The Innovative Therapist

Episode 7.

Hey everyone! Before we dive in to this great episode, did you hear yet about my Free 5-Day Body Respect Challenge?! It's all about how to dig DEEP on your values and tie them directly to your health behaviors. It brings together everything we talk about on this podcast and goes over the HOW of bringing it all together.

Grab your spot today! Doors open Saturday Feb 27th!

Do You Worry about "Messing Up" your Kid's Relationship with Food?

Do you worry that your comments or your struggles with your weight or body image are somehow going to get transferred to your kids? Do you stress that you've already "messed up" your kid's relationship with food and it's beyond repair?Are you stressing about accommodating your children's picky eating and feel that you need to become a short-order cook to get everyone fed? Do you feel frustrated that you want or feel the need to make different meals for different family members due to different health concerns?

If so, you are in the right place. Today's post is for you if you are a parent of any age kid, or have kids in your life you care about. Even if your kids are adults, I promise it isn't too late. Stay tuned for what you can do to prevent difficulties or remedy the situation whether your "kid" is 2, or 62.

Body Image: Let's Take a Look at the Numbers

Let's check out a few stats about body image to see where we are at:

Males

25% of male children and adolescents were concerned about muscularity and leanness and expressed a desire for more toned and defined muscles (Calzo et al., 2015)For adult men in the US, 9% reported frequent body checking and 5% reported body image avoidance (Striegel-Moore et al., 2009).

Females

Of 1000 adult women in Switzerland (ages 30-74), 70% expressed a desire to be thinner (Allaz et al., 1998).50% of girls in the US are unhappy with their body; by 17 years, this number is nearly 80% (Kearney-Cooke et al., 2015).

This is clearly a major issue. This isn't just on the individual families to change this. We need to change at a societal level in terms of how we think about and pursue health. However, as a family unit we have opportunities to improve how we communicate with our loved ones. If nothing else, this can set an example for the world at large.

Am I Going to Say Something to Negatively Impact My Kid?

Frankly the answer is probably. But don't despair. Even if you make a harmful comment, it's never to late to remedy. You are an imperfect human and you are never going to it get it right 100% of the time.

I've worked with many adults and have heard countless stories about how comments from their parents have negatively influenced their relationship with food.

I've heard stories from clients who are in their 60s and 70s tell of how their parents finally owned their mistakes from childhood or parenting them as an adult, and how incredibly helpful and meaningful that conversation was.

Your Anxiety about Your Kiddos is a Major Concern Here

Parental anxiety and worry is REAL. And it isn't going away. But we have to be aware of it and keep it in check, in many areas but particularly when it comes to their health.

The absolute hardest thing do to as a parent is to watch your children be in pain and to struggle. And yet, we have to allow them space to do so so that they can learn and develop confidence.

I know you want your kids to eat well and be as healthy as possible. You want to help them avoid significant weight gain, as you are well aware that being in a larger body in our society is harder. You know that if they gain weight, not only it is harder to lose it (particularly when it's more than 20-30 lbs or so), but that they are also much more likely to experience significant bias and may have a harder time in social relationships or finding a job due to their weight.

Your Suggestions about "Health" Are Probably Making Things Worse

You can have your anxiety, but your comments and suggestions about "healthy changes" your kid can make are probably making things worse.

Your suggestions to "join a sports team" or that they think about if they "really need that snack" is making things exponentially worse, not better.

Sometimes, parents are blatantly cruel when it comes to their child's weight. Like stories I've heard where the entire family including the siblings will call a heavier child "piggie" as a nickname. This is clearly awful and inappropriate.

The Subtle Comments Can Be Just as Harmful

Many times, however, it can be more subtle. Like a mom who suggests the daughter come to a Weight Watchers meeting with her, to "get healthier." Or the dad who tells his kid they need to join a sports team to "stay fit."

Kids read between the lines easily and they know you. If you are worried about their weight, they probably know. They don't hear your comment as worry or concern. Much of the time all they hear is "my parents think I'm ugly, fat, obese" or often "my parents don't love and accept me as I am."

The Sense of Acceptance and Belonging is the Absolute Best Thing You Can Do For Them

One of the key psychological needs for vitality and thriving is relatedness, which is defined as a sense of belonging and connectedness with those around you (Deci & Ryan, 2012). Your family is ideally the place you get their first, and can always return to when you are struggling to find this sense.

What If You ARE Still Struggling with Poor Body Image?

Sadly, this is likely to be the case. You saw the stats above.

So if kids are always watching and know us so well, how do we hide our own "stuff" from them as we are actively working on it (hopefully)?

First, make sure you in fact ARE working on your own issues. Many times, we can get complacent and accept that "I'm just going to hate my body, it's the way it is" or we think that we have been self-critical our whole lives so we will always be this way.

This is not only a sad reality for you, but it certainly isn't going to help your kiddos.

How a Growth Mindset Can Help the Whole Family Overcome Food and Body Image Issues

The great news is, the mindset of learning, growing and changing is one that can be applied to any struggle we have. It is also a mindset that will serve us regardless of what goals or dreams we hope to achieve.

You can acknowledge that you are working on your relationship with food and body image while still helping your kids work on theirs, regardless of where you are both at. Maybe your kiddo is actually farther ahead than you. That's ok. Listen more than you talk, ask open ended questions, and find out their experience.

Remind them (and yourself) that you are human, you are a work in progress, and you want to support them but you don't always know the best way. Tell them you want them to be happy and you are sorry if you ever made them feel less than ok or unaccepted in the past. Let them know that if there's things they want you to do or say, or not do or say, to help them be the best version of themselves, you are more than happy to listen.

5 Tips to Promote a Great Body Image for the Whole Family

Avoid "diet talk". Instead, talk about your habits and how you feel. Feeling uncomfortable in your jeans today and tempted to tell your spouse how fat you feel? Keep the thought to yourself. Instead of saying "I feel so fat," or "I've gained weight I feel gross" change it to something like "I've been feeling low energy, I am going to make sure I get a walk in today as that usually helps" or "I would like to cook more home cooked meals this week." Focus on how you want to feel instead, and the behaviors that will help you get there.Shift the household towards a similar eating pattern. Here's the thing. The eating pattern that works for most is similar across people. When we say each person needs their own food, because some people in the house are on a diet and some aren't, not only it is exclusive of them and unhelpful, it also isn't true. If you move towards mostly plant-based whole foods for most of the meals, you can stop stressing about the variation. Will it take time to move in that direction if you are eating the standard American diet right now, yep. It can be gradual. You know what works best for your family, but keep an open mind. You might be surprised what the family can learn to like.Avoid restriction whenever you can. Avoid bringing tons of sweets or tempting foods into your home but don't be overly rigid. If you have a ton of sweets there now, there isn't a need to get rid of them all at once. Just gradually get out of the habit of buying them where you can. If you usually get a bag of candy from the grocery store and your kids know and ask about this, gradually just start buying less, or stop altogether. If they ask, just say, oh you know I decided not to get the bag of candy this time. If they want to know why, maybe say "I was focused on getting some of the other ingredients for dinner and I didn't think of it" or "sometimes if it's in the house I eat more than I want to and then my stomach feels upset, so I thought we could just start going out when we want to get something sweet instead." Obviously, choose language that works for you and is age appropriate with your kiddos, but focus on function and how you feel versus weight or how they feel. Model a healthy relationship with your body even if you don't always feel it.Don't catastrophize. Here is the thing. Overeating on sweets or processed foods here and there won't cause your kids to be overweight overnight. With our kids, because we care a lot, we tend to catastrophize. If you find yourself thinking "omg, she's going to get addicted to candy and become overweight", reign yourself in. When tasty stuff is around, our brains are designed so that we overeat. It's how candy is designed, not so we eat just one. Nothing is wrong with them, and they aren't out of control....

Episode 7.

Hey everyone! Before we dive in to this great episode, did you hear yet about my Free 5-Day Body Respect Challenge?! It's all about how to dig DEEP on your values and tie them directly to your health behaviors. It brings together everything we talk about on this podcast and goes over the HOW of bringing it all together.

Grab your spot today! Doors open Saturday Feb 27th!

Do You Worry about "Messing Up" your Kid's Relationship with Food?

* Do you worry that your comments or your struggles with your weight or body image are somehow going to get transferred to your kids? * Do you stress that you've already "messed up" your kid's relationship with food and it's beyond repair?* Are you stressing about accommodating your children's picky eating and feel that you need to become a short-order cook to get everyone fed? Do you feel frustrated that you want or feel the need to make different meals for different family members due to different health concerns?

If so, you are in the right place. Today's post is for you if you are a parent of any age kid, or have kids in your life you care about. Even if your kids are adults, I promise it isn't too late. Stay tuned for what you can do to prevent difficulties or remedy the situation whether your "kid" is 2, or 62.

Body Image: Let's Take a Look at the Numbers

Let's check out a few stats about body image to see where we are at:

Males

* 25% of male children and adolescents were concerned about muscularity and leanness and expressed a desire for more toned and defined muscles (Calzo et al., 2015)* For adult men in the US, 9% reported frequent body checking and 5% reported body image avoidance (Striegel-Moore et al., 2009).

Females

* Of 1000 adult women in Switzerland (ages 30-74), 70% expressed a desire to be thinner (Allaz et al., 1998).* 50% of girls in the US are unhappy with their body; by 17 years, this number is nearly 80% (Kearney-Cooke et al., 2015).

This is clearly a major issue. This isn't just on the individual families to change this. We need to change at a societal level in terms of how we think about and pursue health. However, as a family unit we have opportunities to improve how we communicate with our loved ones. If nothing else, this can set an example for the world at large.

Am I Going to Say Something to Negatively Impact My Kid?

Frankly the answer is probably. But don't despair. Even if you make a harmful comment, it's never to late to remedy. You are an imperfect human and you are never going to it get it right 100% of the time.

I've worked with many adults and have heard countless stories about how comments from their parents have negatively influenced their relationship with food.

I've heard stories from clients who are in their 60s and 70s tell of how their parents finally owned their mistakes from childhood or parenting them as an adult, and how incredibly helpful and meaningful that conversation was.

Your Anxiety about Your Kiddos is a Major Concern Here

Parental anxiety and worry is REAL. And it isn't going away. But we have to be aware of it and keep it in check, in many areas but particularly when it comes to their health.

The absolute hardest thing do to as a parent is to watch your children be in pain and to struggle. And yet, we have to allow them space to do so so that they can learn and develop confidence.

Episode 6. For this episode I talked with Quinn Menier about the book The Body is Not an Apology: The Power of Radical Self-Love by Sonya Renee Taylor. Quinn is a fellow entrepreneur and podcaster, board certified case manager in behavioral health, and friend of mine and she was gracious enough to come on today to talk about some of the concepts in this book from the perspective of a Black Woman.

The Body Respect Free Challenge Opens Saturday Feb 27th!

You will learn:

How to dig deep and clarify your valuesEasy ways to add more plants into your lifeMost importantly, how to apply an anti-diet mindset to habit change

All 100% free and in 10-20 minutes per day. Giveaway for fun prizes at the end and free PDF workbook to take with you. Learn more and join us here!

Body Shame and The Black Body

Although our conversation certainly isn't comprehensive and frankly is just the tip of the iceberg in terms of these important topics, Quinn and I talk about the following:

Body shame from the perspective of a Black Woman, including the additional barriers to body acceptance and radical self-loveWhy certain groups like the Black community have additional barriers to body acceptance and radical self-love, and how understanding and breaking down these barriers is essential for the health of all of usSome ways we can move towards a inclusive view of health, starting with our school systems

"It's a lot to unpack."

This phase was used at least 3 times in this podcast. We have so much work to do in better understanding issues of racial justice and equity for all bodies. This includes but is not limited to different races, ethnicities, abilities, beliefs, and sexual orientation.

This isn't just a matter of social justice and doing what is "right" but a matter of life and death in many ways. We need to start viewing our health as a whole picture.

What is Poodle Science?

The author discussed the concept of poodle science as a metaphor and illustration of lack of appreciation for body diversity. Check out this video for a video depiction of this.

This metaphor is based on the idea that "poodles" meaning the white majority culture conducts health research and measurements that are based on the white majority culture, and do not take into account the fact that diversity is inherent and useful biologically and "poodle" bodies are not going to look or weigh the same as say, "mastiff" bodies. Therefore, for "poodles" to come in and tell mastiff's that they need to lose weight to make their bodies look like poodles isn't helpful or healthy for the mastiff's.

We also talk about the body mass index and it's failure to be useful in determining true health, how this wasn't necessarily a new concept to Quinn. We also talk about some of her experiences with weight bias and lack of appreciation for diversity in medical care.

Key Takeaways from our Discussion

We talk about some tough topics in this podcast, but if you read to the book, you will hear a hopeful message. A message that reminds you that there is a lot that can be done to improve these issues, and we have more control than we think.

Here are a few places to start:

Keep talking. Only by continuing to have these conversations about the fact that we need to re-think our definitions of health to support the health of everyone will we actually make progress. Even when you don't fully agree with everything we talk about here, that is okay. Let's still have the conversation so we can move forward. It can be hard and uncomfortable at times, but oh-so worth it. Start with yourself. The great news is, not only can we start working on radical self-love within ourselves (of which we have more control), doing so will allow us to better support others getting there. Is it hard work? Of course, we have many barriers as body shame is pervasive. Folks in bodies that aren't the "default body" meaning not the white, slim, able-bodied, cis-gender body that we so prize, have a longer, steeper upbill battle to climb. But the more we work to improve this in ourselves, the more we can inspire others to do the same. Stop the shame. Look, we all do it. But it's time to make an active effort to stop shaming our bodies and the bodies of others. Whether you have fully given up weight loss as a goal or not, that is 100% your choice. Whether your body looks like the default body or not, your body deserves love and appreciation. Go first. Be courageous. We all have body shame. Instead of telling others what to do, feel, or think, start by sharing your experience first. Be vulnerable (in safe environments) and share your experience. Share what you struggle with and what has been useful. You never know how it will impact someone. This is way more likely to be useful compared to telling someone what to do, think, or feel.

Learn More About Quinn Menier!

Quinn has a business that helps mom's of children with special needs get their and their children's needs met. You can find more about this on her website.

She also has a podcast called Momma's Morning Cup where she interviews moms and talks about the 5 pillars of: Inspiration, Family, Health, Career, and the love of Books.

Let me just say that I've already been brought to tears with the stories on that podcast and I know you will be inspired too, so check it out!

Disclosure: Using the Bookshop.org links in this post means that I would get an affiliate fee if you purchase from the online bookshop (this also supports local bookstores too!).

Disclaimer: This blog and podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for individual professional advice or treatment, including medical or mental health advice. It does not constitute a provider patient relationship.

Episode 6. For this episode I talked with Quinn Menier about the book The Body is Not an Apology: The Power of Radical Self-Love by Sonya Renee Taylor. Quinn is a fellow entrepreneur and podcaster, board certified case manager in behavioral health, and friend of mine and she was gracious enough to come on today to talk about some of the concepts in this book from the perspective of a Black Woman.

The Body Respect Free Challenge Opens Saturday Feb 27th!

You will learn:

* How to dig deep and clarify your values* Easy ways to add more plants into your life* Most importantly, how to apply an anti-diet mindset to habit change

All 100% free and in 10-20 minutes per day. Giveaway for fun prizes at the end and free PDF workbook to take with you. Learn more and join us here!

Body Shame and The Black Body

Although our conversation certainly isn't comprehensive and frankly is just the tip of the iceberg in terms of these important topics, Quinn and I talk about the following:

* Body shame from the perspective of a Black Woman, including the additional barriers to body acceptance and radical self-love* Why certain groups like the Black community have additional barriers to body acceptance and radical self-love, and how understanding and breaking down these barriers is essential for the health of all of us* Some ways we can move towards a inclusive view of health, starting with our school systems

"It's a lot to unpack."

This phase was used at least 3 times in this podcast. We have so much work to do in better understanding issues of racial justice and equity for all bodies. This includes but is not limited to different races, ethnicities, abilities, beliefs, and sexual orientation.

This isn't just a matter of social justice and doing what is "right" but a matter of life and death in many ways. We need to start viewing our health as a whole picture.

What is Poodle Science?

The author discussed the concept of poodle science as a metaphor and illustration of lack of appreciation for body diversity. Check out this video for a video depiction of this.

This metaphor is based on the idea that "poodles" meaning the white majority culture conducts health research and measurements that are based on the white majority culture, and do not take into account the fact that diversity is inherent and useful biologically and "poodle" bodies are not going to look or weigh the same as say, "mastiff" bodies. Therefore, for "poodles" to come in and tell mastiff's that they need to lose weight to make their bodies look like poodles isn't helpful or healthy for the mastiff's.

We also talk about the body mass index and it's failure to be useful in determining true health, how this wasn't necessarily a new concept to Quinn. We also talk about some of her experiences with weight bias and lack of appreciation for diversity in medical care.

Key Takeaways from our Discussion

We talk about some tough topics in this podcast, but if you read to the book, you will hear a hopeful message. A message that reminds you that there is a lot that can be done to improve these issues, and we have more control than we think.

Here are a few places to start:

* Keep talking.

Episode 5. Today's podcast will help to clarify some important questions. You all have had some amazing questions over the past few weeks and I think it's important that everyone benefit from the answers.

Before we dive in, this is a good time to remind you that this podcast is for educational and information purposes only and does not constitute any form of medical, psychological, or professional advice. Please always consult with a professional regarding your specific needs and situation.

Listener Questions

Here are some of your great questions.

Can I move away from a diet mentality and still want to change my body or lose weight? Like choose bariatric surgery or follow a specific eating plan?

I'm all about autonomy. Autonomy is freedom of choice without excessive pressure to behave or be a certain way. When I talk about the "diet mentality" or "no longer dieting", I'm talking about how you think and feel about what you are doing, not the specific eating behaviors you are or aren't doing (e.g., following a specific eating plan).

A diet mentality moves us away from autonomy because its all about shoulds, pressures, and typically associated with feelings of restriction or stress about being "on the plan." However, you can autonomously decide to follow any eating plan, because you want to, because you feel good doing it, or because it feels like the best choice for you and your life and specific health considerations.

Let's take an example. If someone has had bariatric surgery and is stressing out because they heard someone say "you can never eat bread after surgery" and feel like they really "shouldn't" eat bread and feel deprived. That's a diet mentality. It's all about shoulds, stress, all-or-nothing thinking.

Yet that same person could choose to eat bread on occasion and really enjoy it without guilt. Alternatively, they could choose to avoid bread due to internal reasons (when they eat bread they feel ill). Both of these examples are autonomous choices. It isn't about the behavior (bread or no bread) it's about how the person thinks and feels about it.

Diet mentality: "I can't or shouldn't ever have bread."

Autonomous motivation: "Avoiding bread feel best for my body. I don't have it, based on my own choice."

Can I move away from the diet mentality and follow a plan like intermittent fasting?

Again, the main question is why are you doing it? Do you feel good following this type of plan? What's the goal here? Is weight loss a main goal or it is about energy, concentration, gut health, etc.? Be honest with yourself here. The underlying reason is what makes all the different in terms of whether it's a diet mentality or autonomous.

Shawn, is this a body acceptance/Health At Every Size podcast or a Plant-Based Podcast? What is happening here? What can I expect?

Great question. I don't know that I can put myself in only one of those buckets and truly support autonomy. The podcast is called Motivation Made Easy because I want to stay true to motivation tory. And that means giving you autonomy and choice. I want you to have access to all the research findings and I want to make it as unbiased as possible. Some of those buckets have strong social movements and followings and that's great and truly important. But I want us to learn from all camps. I think there are many ways to health.

How can I know if I have a diet mentality or if the choice is autonomously motivated?

A great question to ask to ask is whether you would do the behavior even if you knew the scale would never budge.

I'm not saying you have to make yourself not desire weight loss, that's a BIG ask for someone living in our society. But WHY are you making the choices/changes you are making? Do you feel good on the keto diet, intermittent fasting, the plant-based diet? Do you like the exercise or movement you are doing?

I want you to dig deep to your deepest most important values and reasons for change. Those reasons that truly drive you and make you tear up, in a good way.

Much of the time, it has to do with relationships. Showing up as our best selves and connecting with others or being there for them. Helping others. But it's an individual process. Let yourself explore and figure out what your deepest reasons for change truly are.

To dig deeper on this and walk through clarifying your values and tying them to your goals, grab my free PDF here.

We Are all Learning, All the Time

My opinion continues to evolve and change as I learn, grow, and get new information and have new experiences, doesn't yours? I hope with this podcast and blog to create a community where we are all continue to learn grow and gather new information about the topics we talk about here.

I hope we can continue to respect ourselves and each other as we explore and learn together.

Take Home Messages

You deserve accurate information about your health and well-being. There are a lot of biased sources out there. I'm biased too, but I will continue to strive to be true to the evidence, which includes both scientific papers as well peoples experiences. As Brene Brown says, "stories are just data with a soul." I believe we vastly overemphasize weight and weight loss as necessary for health and focusing on this distracts us from things that factor into our health way more, like stress level, health habits, medical care, and healthy relationships, among many others.I also believe moving away from a diet mentality and external should-based motivation is useful for everyone regardless of your weight. A diet mentality means thinking of your eating from a very "should" based all or nothing place. It's by nature external motivation and thus probably going to be short-term. I also believe that everyone deserves information about the power of dietary change on disease risk, such as plant-based eating. I believe it's fully your choice what you do with your body and you deserve to do that without excessive pressure that you SHOULD be a certain way, or eat or move in a certain way.I believe we have a LONG ways to go to improve the way we do things and that is going to involve having hard conversations about where we are failing people with regards to their health, and what we can do about it.

YOU are the Boss of YOU

To sum up, I think of a quote from the show FRIENDS. Phoebe is talking to Rachel and asks her "Is your boyfriend the boss of you?" Rachel says no and Phoebe says "Who is the boss of you?" and Rachel timidly says "You?" Phoebe replies:  "No, you are the boss of you!"

My friends/listeners, you are the boss you. You get to decide what to do with your body and how you approach your health.

I truly hope as a society we can work to give more people more autonomy in this way. For now, I hope you take a quiet moment to ask yourself, "Is this how I want to eat and move? or is it how someone else told me to?" What values or areas are most important to you and how does your health fit into that in your own specific unique way?"

Episode 5. Today's podcast will help to clarify some important questions. You all have had some amazing questions over the past few weeks and I think it's important that everyone benefit from the answers.

Before we dive in, this is a good time to remind you that this podcast is for educational and information purposes only and does not constitute any form of medical, psychological, or professional advice. Please always consult with a professional regarding your specific needs and situation.

Listener Questions

Here are some of your great questions.

Can I move away from a diet mentality and still want to change my body or lose weight? Like choose bariatric surgery or follow a specific eating plan?

I'm all about autonomy. Autonomy is freedom of choice without excessive pressure to behave or be a certain way. When I talk about the "diet mentality" or "no longer dieting", I'm talking about how you think and feel about what you are doing, not the specific eating behaviors you are or aren't doing (e.g., following a specific eating plan).

A diet mentality moves us away from autonomy because its all about shoulds, pressures, and typically associated with feelings of restriction or stress about being "on the plan." However, you can autonomously decide to follow any eating plan, because you want to, because you feel good doing it, or because it feels like the best choice for you and your life and specific health considerations.

Let's take an example. If someone has had bariatric surgery and is stressing out because they heard someone say "you can never eat bread after surgery" and feel like they really "shouldn't" eat bread and feel deprived. That's a diet mentality. It's all about shoulds, stress, all-or-nothing thinking.

Yet that same person could choose to eat bread on occasion and really enjoy it without guilt. Alternatively, they could choose to avoid bread due to internal reasons (when they eat bread they feel ill). Both of these examples are autonomous choices. It isn't about the behavior (bread or no bread) it's about how the person thinks and feels about it.

Diet mentality: "I can't or shouldn't ever have bread."

Autonomous motivation: "Avoiding bread feel best for my body. I don't have it, based on my own choice."

Can I move away from the diet mentality and follow a plan like intermittent fasting?

Again, the main question is why are you doing it? Do you feel good following this type of plan? What's the goal here? Is weight loss a main goal or it is about energy, concentration, gut health, etc.? Be honest with yourself here. The underlying reason is what makes all the different in terms of whether it's a diet mentality or autonomous.

Shawn, is this a body acceptance/Health At Every Size podcast or a Plant-Based Podcast? What is happening here? What can I expect?

Great question. I don't know that I can put myself in only one of those buckets and truly support autonomy. The podcast is called Motivation Made Easy because I want to stay true to motivation tory. And that means giving you autonomy and choice. I want you to have access to all the research findings and I want to make it as unbiased as possible. Some of those buckets have strong social movements and followings and that's great and truly important. But I want us to learn from all camps. I think there are many ways to health.

How can I know if I have a diet mentality or if the choice is autonomously motivated?

A great question to ask to ask is whether you would do the behavior even if you knew the scale would never budge.

Episode 4. Have you ever had a health scare (for you or a loved one) and been frustrated with yourself that it didn't propel you to make a big lifestyle change?

On today's episode of the Motivation Made Easy podcast, I talk about our family's experience learning of our high genetic risk of cancer. I share this as one example of how external fear based motivation can be shifted to internal autonomous motivation and what this has looked like for us.

A Personal Story

Today we are getting personal. I talk first about about having basal cell carcinoma last year and how a recent experience brought up fears about our family history.

I share that my husband has Lynch syndrome, a genetic mutation that greatly increases his risk (and potentially our kids) of many types of cancer.

How to Transform Fear into Positive Progress

When (Fear-Based) External Motivation Does Not Motivate

Have you had a health scare in the past where you really hoped it would propel you to make habit changes in your life, but it didn't? I know this is extremely common, because I would often talk to patients about this.

They might have recently had a heart attack and be incredibly frustrated with themselves that they weren't "taking it more seriously."

I can relate to this, as I think many of us can. In the past, before I stopped dieting, I always hoped that health scares would motivate me to live a healthier life.

I would try to use them as a reason for eating differently ("I have high cholesterol, I shouldn't have that") but really when push came to shove, it didn't work. The motivation was solidly in the external category. "A should" that was not transforming into any internal motivation any time soon.

How to Merge the Eating Disorder & Weight Management Worlds in a Healthy Way

We happened to find out about my husband having Lynch syndrome when I was working in a Preventive Cardiology clinic that recommended plant-based eating. Therefore, I decided to try out the Forks Over Knives Meal Planner as this was often being recommended to our patients.

The Most Shocking Thing I Learned in My Plant-Based Eating Class

I have written about this in the past, but I share again some of the data on how percentage of calories from animal protein is highly linked to cancer risk.

This is another example of how our over focus on weight loss distracts us from the things we actually do have control over (e.g., our habits, how many fresh fruits and vegetable we have on a regular basis).

Take Home Message

I urge you to consider the information you have gotten about your health and your weight. Are you over emphasizing your weight and how much it impacts your health risk?

If you are having a lot of shoulds or fears about your health, I urge you to just notice that, but then turn inward and ask yourself the question, "What do I really want for my life?" "Why is my health important to me?"

Usually our health is important to use because of the things it will allow us to do, now or in the future. If you want more help clarifying this, download my free guide here.

References

Campbell, T. & Campbell, T. C. (2006). The China Study: The Most Comprehensive Study of Nutrition Ever Conducted and the Startling Implications for Diet, Weight Loss, and Long-term Health.

Dunaif, G. E. & Campbell, T. C. (1987). Dietary protein level and aflatoxin B1-induced preneoplastic hepatic lesions in the rat. The Journal of Nutrition, 117, 1298–1302.

Madhavan, T. V. & Gopalan, C. (1968). The effect of dietary protein on carcinogenesis of aflatoxin. Archives of Pathology & Laboratory Medicine, 85, 133-137.

Youngman, L.D., & Campbell, T. C. (1992). Inhibition of aflatoxin B1-induced gamma-glutamyl transpeptidase positive (GGT+) hepatic preneoplastic foci and tumors by low protein diets: evidence that altered GGT+ foci indicate neoplastic potential. Carcinogenesis, 13, 1607–1613.

Youngman, L. D., & Campbell, T. C. (1991). High protein intake promotes the growth of preneoplastic foci in Fischer #344 rats: evidence that early remodeled foci retain the potential for future growth. The Journal of Nutrition, 121.

Episode 4. Have you ever had a health scare (for you or a loved one) and been frustrated with yourself that it didn't propel you to make a big lifestyle change?

On today's episode of the Motivation Made Easy podcast, I talk about our family's experience learning of our high genetic risk of cancer. I share this as one example of how external fear based motivation can be shifted to internal autonomous motivation and what this has looked like for us.

A Personal Story

Today we are getting personal. I talk first about about having basal cell carcinoma last year and how a recent experience brought up fears about our family history.

I share that my husband has Lynch syndrome, a genetic mutation that greatly increases his risk (and potentially our kids) of many types of cancer.

How to Transform Fear into Positive Progress

When (Fear-Based) External Motivation Does Not Motivate

Have you had a health scare in the past where you really hoped it would propel you to make habit changes in your life, but it didn't? I know this is extremely common, because I would often talk to patients about this.

They might have recently had a heart attack and be incredibly frustrated with themselves that they weren't "taking it more seriously."

I can relate to this, as I think many of us can. In the past, before I stopped dieting, I always hoped that health scares would motivate me to live a healthier life.

I would try to use them as a reason for eating differently ("I have high cholesterol, I shouldn't have that") but really when push came to shove, it didn't work. The motivation was solidly in the external category. "A should" that was not transforming into any internal motivation any time soon.

How to Merge the Eating Disorder & Weight Management Worlds in a Healthy Way

We happened to find out about my husband having Lynch syndrome when I was working in a Preventive Cardiology clinic that recommended plant-based eating. Therefore, I decided to try out the Forks Over Knives Meal Planner as this was often being recommended to our patients.

The Most Shocking Thing I Learned in My Plant-Based Eating Class

I have written about this in the past, but I share again some of the data on how percentage of calories from animal protein is highly linked to cancer risk.

This is another example of how our over focus on weight loss distracts us from the things we actually do have control over (e.g., our habits, how many fresh fruits and vegetable we have on a regular basis).

Take Home Message

I urge you to consider the information you have gotten about your health and your weight. Are you over emphasizing your weight and how much it impacts your health risk?

If you are having a lot of shoulds or fears about your health, I urge you to just notice that, but then turn inward and ask yourself the question, "What do I really want for my life?" "Why is my health important to me?"

Usually our health is important to use because of the things it will allow us to do, now or in the future. If you want more help clarifying this, download my

Episode 3. "I am just not motivated."

"I just need more willpower."

Have you ever said something like this? But actually, science does not support that.

It Ain't About Amount, It's About Type

Our first episode of the podcast was all about the 3 KEY psychological needs that facilitate long-term behavior change:

AutonomyCompetenceRelatedness

Today, we are building on this information to talk about different types of motivation.

The different types listed above (ranging from external to internal) are:

External: You do the behavior for the reward or to avoid a punishment. Should or shame based motivation would fall here. Also exercising for the calorie burn or to lose weight would also fall into this category. Introjected: This one is still shame-based, usually. The behavior is often motivated by guilt and should and the person is often putting a lot of internal pressure of themselves to do it, which makes it hard to keep up over the long-term. If nothing else because stress and pressure is exhausting. Identified/Integrated: These types of motivation are based in the person you want to be, like you exercise because it's personally important and/or consistent with how you want to show up in the world. You may or may not love it all the time, but often doing a certain exercise is part of who you are, part of your identity. Intrinsic: You do the behavior because something about it is inherently enjoyable.

Examples of Internal Motivators for Exercise

I wrote a detailed post on this in the past, that you can check out here. The idea with this list is to give you ideas about some of internal motivations for some. Remember that there are no right or wrong answers here, but the list below is just for ideas of what some internal motivators might be for you.

As a reminder, here are some of the ideas:

Make Exercise a Social Occasion

Improve Mobility and Reduce Pain

Manage Stress or Boost Your Mood

Increase Focus & Concentration

Improve Creativity & Problem-Solving

5 Tips to Move Towards Internal Motivation For Exercise

Be on the lookout for ways to make exercise more enjoyable or fun! Time to move away from the shoulds! As children, at some point we intuitively loved to move our bodies. Many of us have lost touch with that and we need to work to get back in touch with our body and what movement it actually likes. I made a free 10 minute audio to help you with this goal. Grab it for free here! Make a realistic plan for the timing and routine that will work best for YOU. Have you heard those articles about the fact that you should workout in the morning? Yeah, me too, and they stress me out. Working out in the morning is great because you get it done and you are less likely to have things come up that get in your way, however, this isn’t right for everyone. Right now, working out in the morning sounds terrible to me. I want to sleep in, so I let myself. In the evening if a walk sounds better than a strength/cardio workout in my basement, I let that “count.” Being flexible in this way leads to better mood benefits from exercise and better long term adherence. And it’s the long-term adding up of your habits that really matters, not whether I can force myself to get up at 5:30am and workout for 21 days in a row.Find a supportive and like-minded community. We are incredibly influenced by the people around us in so many ways. If you are constantly around someone who is saying “I’m too fat, I need to exercise more” or “I need to burn off the calories from this meal” in a self-deprecating way, it will likely influence you negatively. The more we can surround ourselves with people who are exercising in a self-supportive way, the more we get inspired and find new ideas to do the same. Myself and about 10 of my friends have had a private group to provide support and accountability for exercise for about 3 years now. Most of us post several times per week about what we did along with a picture of our sweaty face. The language is always about exercise as self-care and never about hating our bodies or weight loss. We aren’t perfect and we miss days sometimes, but most of us consistently show up week after week, year after year, and many of us attribute the consistency at least partially to the support of the group.Be on the lookout for weight loss as a motivator. Be on the lookout for unhelpful mindsets. Do you hop on the scale (just because, you are "curious") and then think “what’s the point, my weight is the same.”? If your reasons for exercise are not weight-related, then the number on the scale should have no bearing whatsoever on your motivation to move. Just take notice of the mindset and how it impacts that internal motivation, it might be enlightening.Think creatively, or ask for help. Many people have pain or other reasons why exercise is challenging. Sometimes finding creative ways to move is needed, and luckily with the internet there are tons of options. There is chair yoga, other exercises tailored to specific injuries, and yoga modified for different body types. However, always talk to a trusted professional to make sure you fully understand the causes of the pain and your treatment options. And if the professional you talk to tells you the only thing you can do is lose weight, get a second opinion. Unfortunately, weight bias is a common issue among health care professionals and the reality is that many problems can be improved even if the number on the scale does not change.

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Episode 3. "I am just not motivated."

"I just need more willpower."

Have you ever said something like this? But actually, science does not support that.

It Ain't About Amount, It's About Type

Our first episode of the podcast was all about the 3 KEY psychological needs that facilitate long-term behavior change:

* Autonomy* Competence* Relatedness

Today, we are building on this information to talk about different types of motivation.

The different types listed above (ranging from external to internal) are:

* External: You do the behavior for the reward or to avoid a punishment. Should or shame based motivation would fall here. Also exercising for the calorie burn or to lose weight would also fall into this category. * Introjected: This one is still shame-based, usually. The behavior is often motivated by guilt and should and the person is often putting a lot of internal pressure of themselves to do it, which makes it hard to keep up over the long-term. If nothing else because stress and pressure is exhausting. * Identified/Integrated: These types of motivation are based in the person you want to be, like you exercise because it's personally important and/or consistent with how you want to show up in the world. You may or may not love it all the time, but often doing a certain exercise is part of who you are, part of your identity. * Intrinsic: You do the behavior because something about it is inherently enjoyable.

Examples of Internal Motivators for Exercise

I wrote a detailed post on this in the past, that you can check out here. The idea with this list is to give you ideas about some of internal motivations for some. Remember that there are no right or wrong answers here, but the list below is just for ideas of what some internal motivators might be for you.

As a reminder, here are some of the ideas:

* Make Exercise a Social Occasion

* Improve Mobility and Reduce Pain

* Manage Stress or Boost Your Mood

* Increase Focus & Concentration

* Improve Creativity & Problem-Solving

5 Tips to Move Towards Internal Motivation For Exercise

* Be on the lookout for ways to make exercise more enjoyable or fun! Time to move away from the shoulds! As children, at some point we intuitively loved to move our bodies. Many of us have lost touch with that and we need to work to get back in touch with our body and what movement it actually likes. I made a free 10 minute audio to help you with this goal. Grab it for free here! * Make a realistic plan for the timing and routine that will work best for YOU. Have you heard those articles about the fact that you should workout in the morning? Yeah, me too, and they stress me out. Working out in the morning is great because you get it done and you are less likely to have things come up that get in your way, however, this isn’t right for everyone. Right now, working out in the morning sounds terrible to me. I want to sleep in, so I let myself. In the evening if a walk sounds better than a strength/cardio workout in my basement, I let that “count.” Being flexible in this way leads to better mood benefits from exercise and better long term adherence. And it’s the long-term adding up of your habits that really matters,