The real head of DOGE has been revealed and it’s not Elon Musk, President Trump is wresting control of the press pool away from the White House Correspondents Association, and the U.S. may soon offer green cards to anyone able to afford a five million dollar fee. Restaurateur and Food Network star Guy Fieri details the work done by his Guy Fieri Foundation, which provides meals to first responders when disasters, such as the recent wildfires in and around Los Angeles, strike. Season six of Guy’s show, “Tournament Of Champions,” premieres this Sunday on Food Network.

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Some federal employees wrote “very rude” replies to the DOGE email that demanded they list five accomplishments, the White House declined to explain why President Trump has a huge bruise on his right hand, and beloved American restaurant chain Hooters is preparing to file for bankruptcy. If you don’t know her favorite action film, or which animal she finds the scariest, do you really know “Hollywood Squares” host Drew Barrymore? Get to know Drew on a deeper level when she takes The Colbert Questionert!

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Government employees received a weird, aggressive email from Elon Musk over the weekend while the DOGE head was trying his hand at comedy on stage at CPAC. Today, an AI-generated video went viral depicting President Trump licking Elon Musk’s toes. Also, Stephen pleads his viewers to adopt Norbert, the dog Sam Waterston calls, “the world’s bestest dog.” Find adoption info for Norbert and other adorable adoptable pups at http://animalleague.org/rescuedogrescue. Actor Woody Harrelson shares a story about attending his first Grateful Dead concert and sitting somewhere he shouldn’t have. His new film “Last Breath” is in theaters this Friday. 

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Actor Alan Ritchson raves about the cross-generational fanbase for his show "Reacher," where viewers enjoy watching his character take out bad guys in elaborately choreographed fight scenes. And actress Tamara Tunie tells Stephen what to expect from her glass ceiling-breaking new show, "Beyond The Gates," which is the first daytime drama to feature a Black family in the central roles. It also happens to be the first new network soap opera in over 25 years! Watch "Beyond The Gates" when it premieres Monday on CBS.

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Meanwhile... Stephen shares some good news from a seal rescue in Connecticut, and checks in on two developments from New York City’s underground. Also, a woman saved the life of an opossum who ate an entire cake, men in New York City are enhancing their genitals with filler, and beloved actor Mark Hamill didn't miss a beat after his pants fell down while presenting at an awards show.

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Monica Lewinsky talks to Stephen Colbert about how the world has changed since she was in the center of a massive news story in the late 1990s, and why she thinks Taylor Swift would be the ideal podcast guest. Monica's podcast, "Reclaiming," is available wherever you get your podcasts.

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President Trump’s royal decree banning congestion pricing in New York City didn’t go over too well with Gov. Kathy Hochul, Elon Musk has set his sights on America’s gold depository at Fort Knox, and California is set to recognize Sasquatch as the state’s official cryptid. America’s favorite weatherman takes a stand against Stephen Colbert in the long-simmering battle over whether it’s appropriate to serve shrimp with their tails intact.

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The government is scrambling to rehire federal workers fired from crucial jobs managing nuclear weapons and disease control, the White House insists Elon Musk is not the person running DOGE, and President Trump is spouting Russian propaganda as he seeks a deal with Vladimir Putin to end the war in Ukraine. Acting legend Robert De Niro talks about why he decided to do a limited television series for the first time, and gives a preview of what happens to America in “Zero Day,” which is streaming now on Netflix.

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Federally-indicted New York City Mayor Eric Adams opened his city’s prison system to ICE agents as part of a reported quid pro quo agreement with President Trump, who will allegedly help Adams avoid prison in exchange for cooperation on the president’s agenda. Oscar-winner George Clooney talks about legendary CBS journalist Edward R. Murrow, who was the most trusted person in television news during the 1950s when he stood up to powerful figures like Sen. Joseph McCarthy. Watch his portrayal of Murrow on Broadway in “Good Night, and Good Luck” in previews beginning March 12th and opening April 3rd at the Winter Garden Theater.

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Stephen employs a metaphor to explain President Trump’s tyrannical behavior over the past week, MapQuest is resisting the president’s order to rename the Gulf of Mexico, and we have a preview of the entertainment Trump has planned as he takes control of an esteemed American cultural institution. Stephen asks his Strike Force Five podcast-mate to dive deeper into a story that was mentioned on the pod, involving a mysterious woman who showed up in a family picture drawn by his son Hudson. Watch “Last Week Tonight” airing Sundays on HBO.

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