// April 27, 2026

That's emotional support rust.

• Intro: Bad Bad News, Leon Bridges, Columbia (2018)
• Poem: And Isn't Everything at Risk, Gregory Orr
• Music: Comfortably Numb, Scissor Sisters, Polydor Records (2004)

These donuts aren't gonna eat themselves.

• Intro: Come on Eileen, Save Ferris, Epic (1997)
• Poem: Late Fragment, Raymond Carver
• Music: Groove Is in the Heart, Deee-Lite, Elektra Records (1990)

Nothing says 'productivity' like people who won't take their right of way.

• Intro: Come on Eileen, Save Ferris, Epic (1997)
• Poem: Te Deum, Charles Reznikoff
• Music: Grace Kelly, MIKA, Casablanca Records/Island UK (2007)

The merge lane is about momentum, not courtesy.

• Intro: Come on Eileen, Save Ferris, Epic (1997)
• Poem: The Committee Weighs In, Andrea Cohen
• Music: Rebirth Of Slick (Cool Like Dat), Digable Planets, Pendulum Records (1993)

Is this existential dread or just...Tuesday?

• Intro: Come on Eileen, Save Ferris, Epic (1997)
• Poem: In Memoriam, Leo Dangel
• Music: Ooh La La, Goldfrapp, Mute, a BMG Company (2005)

We're all just one poorly-timed intersection from being late.

• Intro: Come on Eileen, Save Ferris, Epic (1997)
• Poem: Cabbage, Charles Simic
• Music: Hollywood Swinging, Kool & The Gang, Island Mercury (1973)

Get in, losers, we're getting donuts.

• Intro: About Damn Time, Lizzo, Nice Life/Atlantic (2022)
• Poem: From time to time, Matsuo Basho
• Music: Ice Cream, New Young Pony Club, Universal Music Australia Pty. Ltd. (2007)

What's the deal with commuting, am I right?

• Intro: About Damn Time, Lizzo, Nice Life/Atlantic (2022)
• Poem: A Prayer for Future Us, Harriet Solinas
• Music: Sun of a Gun, Oh Land, Epic (2011)

Day-old coffee is still coffee.

• Intro: About Damn Time, Lizzo, Nice Life/Atlantic (2022)
• Poem: My Mother Asks How I'm Doing with Just Whiskey and Cats, Joyce Sullivan
• Music: Chains of Love, Erasure, Rhino/Warner Records (1988)

The door's not child-locked, it just...won't open.

1. Intro: About Damn Time, Lizzo, Nice Life/Atlantic (2022)
2. Poem: Love comes quietly, Robert Creeley
3. Music: Bear with Me, Propaganda;Marz Ferrer, Fair Trade/Columbia (2017)