Thinking leads to trouble, and no good comes of it. When you think you might be having a thought, simply turn to one of the government’s many regulation entertainment programs. For instance, there is the House of Apples located in every town where you can practice eating apples. Since apples do not exist, you will be using faux horse chestnuts. Faux because horse chestnuts no longer exist. Or you can mosey on down to the Twirl Your Arms Around center, where an instructor will indicate when you should twirl your arms around. These are all fine alternatives to thinking.

We think that you should listen to the Mustache Rangers Interpod Netcast today.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 54 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

It is the charge of every Earth-liver to consume. Food, plastics, and oxygen are ripe for the literal and non-literal digestion. Shoes, however, are a different sort of beast. Neither plastic nor oxygen, they sit and wait in a bin of blank description. The greatest scientist in the time of our great-great-grandchildren may finally discover an adequate category for the shoe, but we will not be alive to see it. But you may fall asleep, knowing that our future is safe.

The Mustache Rangers have put together another interpod netcast for your listening enjoyment. So pleasure your ears with their sweet sounds. But pleasure only within the legal limit, please.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 53 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

It has come to our attention that the span of attention that most people can hold is less than ten seconds. Luckily for these individuals, the Short Attention Span Termination Squad also had a short attention span. Sadly, they are unable to even terminate themselves. It is was a terrible program, and we are sorry for having wasted your monies on it.

Today, the Mustache Rangers make you happy. So you had best listen closely to their message of pieces.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 52 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Another Monday has arrived. Do not expect a fanfare for a Monday. It is comparable to another Meredith or Beatrice arriving at your party. The come along with regularity, and generally bring stories of shopping at craft stores. Yes, a Monday is not a special thing in the least.

Enjoy today’s interpod netcast of the Mustache Rangers. It will in enjoy you, that is guaranteed.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 51 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers have reached the arbitrary 50 episode mark! What better way to celebrate than with your families? You should head home right now and take care of the celebration. This is a mandatory celebration. All persons of non-celebration will be stripped of their VIP status, and downgraded to IP. And then P. And then P, but in a lower case. You have been warned.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 50 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

The Mustache Rangers have left Earth again, for the good of the Earth. As you’re sure to know, only 100 people are allowed on the Earth at a time. If 101 people were allowed on to the Earth, everything would be thrown out of balance. Emily and Winston Grack will be happy to come home from their temporary orbit, now that the Rangers have left.

On today’s fantastic adventure of magnificence, the Mustache Ranger remember things. Enjoy your interpod netcast!

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 49 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

It may physically harm you to realize this, but the Earth is not flat. It’s okay, relax. We have given you a informational punch to the stomach. The Earth is actually shaped more like a ribbon. The Great Mustache help us all if the giant space cat awakens from its million and two year slumber.

Today, the Mustache Rangers interpod netcast brings you information on candles. Your enjoyment is necessary.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 48 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

A deep that has begun in space. Things are warming up nicely, and the wildlife has come out to greet explorers of all kinds. Don’t be a stranger to the wildlife. It tastes great.

The Mustache Rangers are taking a break from moving merchandising, and getting back to the business of exploring. And if not exploring, then something else completely. Enjoy the current interpod netcast.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 47 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

Desperate times call for not so desperate measures. Today’s hilarious interpod netcast is trying to part you with your hard earned monies. But the benefits are great.

The specific benefits are a discounted price on a Doc Johnson’s Olde Tyme Elixir t-shirt. These t-shirts are available for PRE-ORDER for this special price. But once the shirts go to print, these fantastic savings will disappear like the dolphostich.

The online internet order form for these chest warming cloth shirts can be found RIGHT HERE.

Who needs electronics when you can purchase t-shirts? The t-shirts were probably made with electronics. That you don’t need to buy.

Are you still reading this? You should be listening! Or ordering. You could probably do both at the same time. You’re that talented.

The post The Mustache Rangers: Episode 46 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.

If you extend a season’s greetings to somebody in the middle of summer, you will be pummeled for being odd and out of place. This generic term is to be used in the middle of winter, and that is it. Don’t forget that, or else you may get pummeled for the reasons that have already been stated.

The Mustache Rangers bring you season’s greetings into today’s adventure of the season. For some reason.

The post Celebrate Terrance Day, The Mustache Rangers: Episode 45 appeared first on The Mustache Rangers Podcast.