In this Valentine’s Day special, Bryan and Tracy reflect on nearly 30 years of marriage by choosing one word to define each decade, encouraging you to do the same. From the chaos of young parenting to the tension of busy schedules and the transition into the empty nest years, they share honest lessons from every season. Wherever you are in your marriage journey, this episode will encourage you to embrace the season you’re in and trust how God is using it to shape you both. We hope it inspires conversation for your Valentine's Day date night out!

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The PursueGOD Family podcast helps you think biblically about marriage and parenting. Join Bryan and Tracy Dwyer on Wednesday mornings for new topics every week or two.

Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org/family.

Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.

Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.

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WHY DID JESUS HAVE TO BECOME HUMAN? (CHRISTOLOGY 2)

Last week, we began our journey through Hebrews by focusing on Christ’s divine nature. In just four verses, we saw that Jesus is the agent, purpose, sustainer, and ruler of creation. He is fully God—uncreated, eternal, and the exact expression of God’s nature. That was a lot of theology packed into a small space.

Today we slow down and move to Christology part two: Jesus’ human nature. This raises a crucial question for Christians then and now: Why did Jesus have to become human?

The theological term for this is the incarnation—the central Christian belief that the eternal Son of God took on human nature in the person of Jesus Christ. Importantly, Jesus did not stop being God when He came to earth. He retained His divine nature and added a fully human nature. This means Jesus is one person with two distinct natures: fully God and fully man. No other being in the universe exists like this.

While on earth, Jesus didn’t “turn off” His divine power. Instead, He chose not to exercise His divine attributes independently. He lived in complete dependence on the Holy Spirit. The early church called this mystery the hypostatic union. It’s deep theology, but the book of Hebrews doesn’t present it as abstract theory. It presents it as good news.

Let’s slow down and read our passage for the day:

Hebrews 2:14–18 (NLT)

Because God’s children are human beings—made of flesh and blood—the Son also became flesh and blood. For only as a human being could he die, and only by dying could he break the power of the devil, who had the power of death. Only in this way could he set free all who have lived their lives as slaves to the fear of dying…

From this passage, Hebrews gives us seven reasons Jesus had to become human.

First, Jesus became human because we are human. Since God’s children are flesh and blood, the Son also became flesh and blood. Only a human could represent the human race before God. To save humanity, the Savior had to belong to humanity. In God’s courtroom of justice, Jesus stands as our representative—one who truly understands our condition.

Second, Jesus became human so He could die. Death is the penalty for sin, established by God from the beginning. This is the great paradox of the gospel: the Author of life became mortal. If Jesus had remained only divine, He could not have died—and if He could not die, we could not overcome death. Hebrews later reminds us that without the shedding of blood, there is no forgiveness of sins.

Third, Jesus became human so He could break the power of the devil. Hebrews says that through death, Jesus destroyed the one who had the power of death. Satan once held the authority to accuse humanity and hold eternal separation over our heads. Notice the tense—had the power of death. Through the cross, that authority was broken.

Fourth, Jesus became human to set us free from the fear of death. Death is still inevitable, but it no longer has the final word. In the ancient world, death was a constant companion, and fear of it shaped daily life. The Christian hope of resurrection transformed everything. As Paul later declared, “O death, where is your victory?” Christians don’t have to live as slaves to fear anymore.

Fifth, Jesus became human so He could be our high priest. A priest bridges the gap between a holy God and broken people. Jesus had to be made like us in every respect to fulfill this role. He is merciful toward our weakness and faithful toward God’s holiness. Hebrews will return to this theme again and again.

Sixth, Jesus became human so He could be our sacrifice. In the Old Testament, priests offered animals. In the New Covenant, the Priest is the sacrifice. This is the ultimate power move of grace: Jesus offered Himself to take away the sins of the people.

Seventh, Jesus became human so He could help us in our testing. Hebrews was written to believers facing persecution and temptation to give up. Jesus understands. He was abandoned, tempted, grieving, and suffering. Because He endured testing Himself, He is able to help us when we are tested.

The author later sums it up beautifully: because Jesus is our great High Priest, we can come boldly to God’s throne. If Jesus had remained distant in heaven, God’s throne would be a place of terrifying judgment—a “Keep Out” sign for sinners. But because Jesus added a human nature to His divine nature, God is now approachable.

You don’t have to clean yourself up. You don’t need fancy words. You come boldly—not because you are worthy, but because Jesus is. At the throne of grace, we receive mercy, not judgment.

In this episode, Tracy unpacks the idea of a time budget and challenges us to take an honest look at how we spend our time and what it reveals about our true priorities. By examining our daily routines, she invites us to align our schedules with what we say matters most—especially our relationship with God.

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The PursueGOD Family podcast helps you think biblically about marriage and parenting. Join Bryan and Tracy Dwyer on Wednesday mornings for new topics every week or two.

Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org/family.

Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.

Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.

Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at [email protected].

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We all have the same 24 hours in a day. How we spend those hours tells a powerful story—one that reveals our true priorities, passions, and commitments. It’s easy to say we value certain things—faith, family, health—but when we step back and take an honest look at how we actually spend our time, the truth becomes clear. Are we really living according to the values we claim to hold dear?

Think about it: if someone tracked your daily routine for a week, what would they discover? Maybe they’d find that your evenings are filled with sports practices, Netflix binges, or endless scrolling on your phone. Church attendance or involvement might fall down the list with sports tourneys for the kids, camping on the weekends or other vacations. Maybe work consumes your days and fatigue takes your nights. None of these are inherently bad—but when they take up the bulk of our time, we have to ask: What’s being left out?

“Moments aggregate, and they become memories and tradition. Our routines become who we are, become the story and culture of our families.

“Think of it like this: when it comes to spiritual formation, our households are not simply products of what we teach and say. They are much more products of what we practice and do.” These habits of the household are giving our children windows into what we mean when we talk about faith.

“The liturgical lens allows us to see all of our normal moments for what they really are: moments of worship to someone or something.”

One of the most eye-opening exercises you can do is create a "time budget". Just like a financial budget shows you where your money goes, a time budget breaks down how you spend the 168 hours in your week. Include everything: sleep, work, meals, commutes, entertainment, family time, exercise, screen time—and yes, time with God.

Take time to do a time breakdown of a month. Think of all that you do in a day and in a week.

Once you've created your time budget, take a step back and look at it. Ask yourself:

1. What gets the most hours?
2. What gets squeezed in?
3. What gets neglected entirely?
4. And most importantly: Where does God fit in your week?

The expectation isn’t to say you should spend hours in prayer and Bible reading a day, but a good question to ask is, “How much time does God get?” It’s about recognizing whether your relationship with God is being treated as a priority or an afterthought.

In Joshua 24:14–15, Joshua challenges the people of Israel to make a decision:

“Now fear the Lord and serve him with all faithfulness… But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve... But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”

Joshua's words are a reminder that faithfulness requires intention. You don’t accidentally serve God with your life—you choose to. And that choice is reflected in how you spend your time.

If your time budget reveals that God is getting your leftovers, don’t be discouraged—make a change. Just like with a financial budget, adjustments are possible. Maybe it means starting your morning with prayer instead of scrolling. Maybe it’s carving out time in your week for church, Bible study, or serving others.

Reallocating your time is about aligning your daily rhythms with what (and Who) matters most.

The truth is simple: how you spend your time is how you spend your life. And your life is shaped by your priorities.

If God is truly important to you, let it show up in your schedule. Not just in theory—but in practice, day by day, hour by hour.

Deuteronomy 6:5–9

“And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength. And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today. Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”

While the Bible depicts the devil as a formidable and active force in our world, his authority is far from absolute. Often misunderstood as an equal opposite to God, the devil is actually a created being whose influence is strictly bound by divine permission. His "power" is less about brute force and more about the strategic use of deception, accusation, and the exploitation of human fear. This episode explores the specific nature of his influence—often described as the "god of this world"—while highlighting the ultimate victory that renders him a defeated foe for those who stand in the truth of Christ.

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The PursueGOD Truth podcast is the “easy button” for making disciples – whether you’re looking for resources to lead a family devotional, a small group at church, or a one-on-one mentoring relationship. Join us for new episodes every Tuesday and Friday.

Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org.

Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.

Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.

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The devil is frequently referred to as the "ruler of this world" or the "god of this age." This doesn't imply legal ownership of the earth, but rather a pervasive influence over its current systems and spiritual darkness.

1. Atmospheric Influence: He works through human culture and philosophies to nudge people toward rebellion.
2. Spiritual Hierarchy: While not omnipresent (like God), he leads a structure of spiritual forces aimed at clouding human judgment.
3. Temporary Authority: His "rule" is a result of humanity's original fall and remains only as long as God allows it for His greater purposes.

The devil’s most potent weapon isn't physical; it is misinformation. By masquerading as an "angel of light," he twists truth to create mental strongholds.

1. The Father of Lies: Deception is his native language. He seeks to make good look evil and evil look good.
2. The Accuser: He uses our failures to convince us we are beyond God’s grace, effectively sidelining our faith through guilt.
3. Mental Strongholds: By planting seeds of doubt regarding God's goodness, he leads individuals into spiritual bondage.

Historically, the devil used the fear of death as a chain to keep humanity in slavery. Because sin leads to death, he used human guilt as a legal claim.

1. The Great Disarming: Through the incarnation and resurrection, Jesus broke this power.
2. A Change in Perspective: For the believer, death is no longer a tool of the enemy or a source of dread, but a transition into the presence of God.

A crucial theological point is that the devil and God are not equal. The devil is on a "leash" and must operate within boundaries set by the Creator.

1. The Job Example: In the Book of Job, Satan had to request permission before acting, and God set strict limits on what he could touch.
2. Finite Capabilities: The devil is not all-knowing, not all-powerful, and cannot be in multiple places at once.

Victory over the devil’s influence is not achieved through human willpower, but through submission to God.

1. Resist and Flee: The promise is that when we resist him, he will flee.
2. The Armor of God: This "armor" is comprised of spiritual truths (The Gospel, Righteousness, and the Word of God).
3. No Forced Sin: While he can tempt and suggest, he cannot control a person's will unless they give him ground.

The Takeaway: The devil is a defeated enemy. While we must remain "sober and alert," we do not need to live in paranoia. The "One who is in you" is infinitely greater than the one in the world.

In this episode, Brandi and AJ share how unanswered questions, painful discovery, and an honest search for truth led them from “grinding for godhood” in Mormonism to encountering the real Jesus of the Bible.

Check out Brandi's Book: The Journey to Jesus: Finding Christ after Leaving Mormonism

Brandi's Instagram

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The Unveiling Mormonism podcast pulls back the curtain on Mormon history, culture and doctrine. Join us for new episodes every Monday.

Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org/mormonism.

Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.

Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.

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Brandi and AJ were doing everything “right.” They were BYU grads, married, building a life, raising kids, and fully committed to the LDS vision of a faithful future. AJ describes it like “grinding for godhood”—a life built on steps, worthiness, temple goals, and constant striving. But then the foundation started to crack.

For AJ, some of the doctrinal history raised unsettling questions (including ideas like “blood atonement,” which they mention they’ll unpack later). For Brandi, the tipping point was watching changes in the LDS church after COVID and feeling like the church was shifting in a more progressive direction. She tried to address it the way a devoted member would: she wrote letters to Salt Lake City headquarters about what she saw as inconsistency—especially related to abortion and human life. She wasn’t trying to tear anything down. She genuinely believed the LDS church was true, and she wanted it to be consistent.

But the response felt dismissive—more like a polite pat on the head than a meaningful engagement. That frustration pushed them into a place they never thought they’d go: researching.

Brandi makes an important clarification: they weren’t hunting for “gotcha” moments. They didn’t go searching because they assumed the church was false. In fact, they needed it to be true. That’s why reading outside sources felt dangerous. AJ describes that fear as avoiding the “cognitive dissonance fire”—because their hearts were convinced, and they didn’t want their minds persuaded that everything was a lie.

But once they started reading, the “genie” didn’t go back in the bottle.

They looked at sources like MormonThink because it included multiple perspectives—both critical claims and apologetic responses. That felt more balanced. Still, it wasn’t official, and Brandi felt guilty even being there. Eventually, as more historical issues piled up (like multiple First Vision accounts, questions surrounding the Book of Abraham, and other details they had never been taught), Brandi felt desperate for the church itself to clarify things. So they turned to the Gospel Topics Essays—official LDS content hosted on the LDS website.

That’s where everything shifted.

Instead of restoring confidence, the essays confirmed key issues and, in Brandi’s view, exposed more “spin” than clarity. For the first time, she seriously wrestled with the question: What if the church isn’t true?

AJ explains how people often survive early doubts by “nuancing” their faith—making room for uncomfortable data while keeping the system intact. But eventually, they reached a crossroads: Would they live in a growing pile of nuance just to keep the community and structure—or would they follow truth wherever it led, even if it cost them everything?

For them, it took about six months of intense study—re-reading, checking footnotes, cross-referencing sources, and trying to disprove what they were learning. And then came a painful realization: staying “for the good parts” wasn’t enough. They feared raising their kids inside something they no longer believed—only to have their kids later say, “You knew, and you still taught us.”

So they left.

They explain why this often leads to losing all faith. Mormonism doesn’t just shape beliefs—it shapes identity, habits, relationships, and your entire framework for “the good life.” If you were taught you had the pinnacle of truth—and it collapses—then everything else can feel like lesser options or chaos.

AJ’s next step was simple: keep morality, keep family values, and “worship God in the mountains.” Brandi’s journey was darker at first. For a moment, atheism felt peaceful—like relief from endless striving and spiritual pressure. But that peace didn’t last. Holding her baby, she started asking deeper questions: Why is there something rather than nothing? Where does consciousness come from? Can I really trust my feelings to define truth?

She realized she needed sturdier ground than emotion and authority.

Brandi began exploring arguments for God, morality, and the reliability of the Old Testament. That season pulled her into what she calls her “Jewish era”—not literally converting, but deeply studying the Hebrew Scriptures and seeing how unique the Bible’s ethical monotheism really is.

But she also noticed something: the story didn’t feel finished.

Eventually, the Old Testament pushed her toward the question she didn’t want to touch: Jesus. After years of associating His name with LDS pain and betrayal, she approached Jesus through a historical lens: Who was this man who changed the world’s calendar? Why does every major worldview have to deal with Him?

Then she went straight to the hinge point: the resurrection.

Because if Jesus rose from the dead, He is not just a teacher—He is Lord. And if He is Lord, then Christianity isn’t another “system.” It’s a surrender. Brandi describes the moment she felt the implications land: If this is true, it’s the most important event in human history.

AJ’s journey took a different route. He had to be confronted with sin—not just mistakes, but real guilt before a holy God. The Bible dismantled his “good person” confidence. He began to see that the gospel isn’t self-improvement. It’s rescue.

That’s the contrast they highlight:

1. In Mormonism, the “problem” is untapped potential.
2. In Christianity, the problem is sin and separation from God.
3. In Mormonism, the “solution” is a system of ordinances and obedience.
4. In Christianity, the solution is Jesus—His finished work, received by faith.

And that’s where their story is headed: not toward a better version of themselves, but toward a Savior who actually saves.

Scripture References (NLT): Jeremiah 29:13; Mark 4:9; Isaiah 53:5-6; Romans 3:10-12; Isaiah 64:6; Romans 6:23; Ephesians 2:8-9; 1 Corinthians 15:3-8.

Big Idea: Jesus Christ is not just a chapter in the story of God; He is the Author, the Hero, and the Ending. When we see Jesus for who He truly is, every other priority in our lives finds its proper place.

Today we begin a nine-week journey through the Book of Hebrews, a letter written to magnify the greatness of Jesus Christ. Hebrews isn’t primarily about religious rules, moral improvement, or spiritual techniques. It’s about Jesus—who He is and what He has done. Everything else flows from that foundation.

The original audience was likely Jewish Christians living under Roman rule, facing intense persecution. As pressure mounted, many were tempted to abandon their faith in Jesus and return to the familiarity and safety of traditional Judaism. Hebrews speaks directly into that tension with one clear message: Jesus is greater than anyone or anything that came before Him. To walk away from Him would be to walk away from the fulfillment of all God’s promises.

The author of Hebrews remains anonymous, one of the great mysteries of the New Testament. While Paul may have influenced it, the writing style is far more polished and rhetorically sophisticated than Paul’s letters. Hebrews chapter 1 proves this immediately. Verses 1–4 form a single, majestic sentence in the original Greek—an exordium, designed to grab attention with both beauty and weight.

Hebrews 1:1–4 (NLT) sets the stage:

In the Old Testament, God spoke in fragments—a dream here, a burning bush there, a prophet’s warning along the way. But in Jesus, God didn’t just send messages; He sent the Message. This is Christology—the study of the person and work of Jesus Christ—and Hebrews wastes no time getting to the point.

In verses 2–3, the author unleashes a rapid-fire description of Jesus using seven distinct attributes. In Scripture, the number seven represents completeness and perfection. Together, these form a full portrait of the Son.

Jesus is the Heir—the goal of history. God has promised everything to Him as an inheritance. History is not random; it is moving toward the coronation of King Jesus. He is the “why” behind all creation.

Jesus is the Creator—the architect of reality. Through Him, God made the universe. Jesus is not a created being; He is the source of all things. Nothing exists apart from His will.

Jesus is the Radiance—the shining glory of God. He doesn’t merely reflect God’s glory like the moon reflects sunlight; He radiates it. The Son is the visible manifestation of the invisible God—“Light from Light.”

Jesus is the Expression—the exact imprint of God’s nature. The Greek word charaktēr refers to a stamp or seal. Jesus doesn’t resemble God; He perfectly represents Him. To see Jesus is to see God.

Jesus is the Sustainer—the glue of the cosmos. He holds everything together by the power of His word. The universe doesn’t persist on autopilot; it endures because Jesus commands it to.

Jesus is the Savior—the cleanser of sin. When He purified us from our sins, the work was finished. Unlike Old Testament priests who never sat down, Jesus completed the work once for all.

Finally, Jesus is the Ruler—the seated King. He sat down at the right hand of the Majesty in heaven, a position of total authority. The victory is won.

Hebrews 1:4 reminds us that Jesus is far greater than angels, traditions, or anything else we might be tempted to trust. For believers facing hardship, this truth re-centers everything.

The message of Hebrews is clear: It’s all about Jesus. When we see Him rightly, everything else falls into place.

In this episode, Tracy and her son AJ (almost 23) share a field guide for parenting in the digital age. Drawing from AJ’s experience growing up with smartphones and social media, the conversation isn’t meant to scare parents—but to wake them up and help them guide their kids with biblical wisdom.

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The PursueGOD Family podcast helps you think biblically about marriage and parenting. Join Bryan and Tracy Dwyer on Wednesday mornings for new topics every week or two.

Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org/family.

Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.

Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.

Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at [email protected].

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If you’re a parent today, you’re raising kids in a world you didn’t grow up in. Smartphones. Social media. Gaming communities. Private messaging. Endless scrolling. And the truth is, most of us are trying to parent through technology we don’t fully understand—while our kids often understand it better than we do.

In this episode, Tracy teams up with her son AJ (almost 23) to offer a “field guide” for navigating the digital world with your kids. AJ grew up in the smartphone/social media era and shares what he’s learned—both from experience and from research. They call it a cautionary tale, not because parents should panic, but because parents should wake up.

Here’s the big idea: a smartphone isn’t just a phone. It’s a powerful tool with access to an entire universe—and a lot of that universe is unfiltered, unsafe, and deeply shaping.

Parents feel the pressure early. Today, many kids are getting smartphones in elementary school. And when “everyone has one,” kids start to feel like they’ll be left out socially if they don’t.

AJ shares that this pressure isn’t just about having a device—it’s about access to the communication apps everyone uses. If your kid isn’t on the group chat or the app the team uses, they can feel isolated.

But here’s the problem: social pressure is not a good reason to hand your child a tool they aren’t ready to handle.

A better question than “When should my kid get a phone?” is: Is my child ready for this responsibility?

There are phone options that allow for basic communication without opening the floodgates of social media, porn, and endless content. Parents can start with a “dumb phone” and treat it like training wheels.

AJ compares it to driving a car: you don’t hand your kid the keys and hope for the best. You teach them. You supervise. You build habits. You set boundaries. You require trust and responsibility over time.

If you decide to give your child a phone, boundaries matter.

Some practical boundaries include:

1. Screen time limits (and learning delayed gratification)
2. No phone in the bedroom at night
3. Charging phones in a public place
4. No phone use until homework/chores are done
5. Parents know passwords and have full access
6. Regular conversations about what your child is doing online

The goal isn’t to micromanage forever. The goal is to train your child to be wise and self-controlled before they’re fully on their own.

This episode also highlights the “hidden dangers” that many parents don’t realize until it’s too late:

1) Algorithms

Social media apps are designed to learn what your child likes and then feed them more of it—often in addictive cycles. What starts as “normal” can quickly become a constant stream of harmful content.

2) Comparison Culture

Social media trains kids to compare their life to everyone else’s highlight reel. This fuels insecurity, anxiety, depression, and identity confusion—especially for young women.

3) Private Messaging & Predators

Many apps (including gaming communities) allow private conversations. Kids can be groomed, manipulated, bullied, catfished, or blackmailed by people pretending to be someone they’re not.

4) Sexual Content

One of the most urgent warnings is exposure to sexual content and pornography, which can happen shockingly early. AJ emphasizes that kids are not neurologically equipped to handle this—and it can shape their brains, desires, and relationships for years.

To help parents think strategically, the episode ends with a framework:

1. Elementary School: focus on obedience and trust (if any phone, start basic)
2. Middle School: focus on wisdom and self-control (strong boundaries, high caution)
3. High School: focus on ownership and integrity (preparing for adulthood)

And above all: don’t assume “everyone else is doing it” means you should too.

The episode closes with a reminder that Christian parenting is countercultural. God’s people don’t follow the world’s patterns just because they’re common. We protect our kids, shepherd their hearts, and help them grow in wisdom.

Romans 12:2 (NLT) says, “Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think.”

Parents, this conversation is not about fear. It’s about discernment. Your child’s heart, mind, and future are too valuable to leave to the wild west of the internet.

In this episode, Bryan sits down with Brandi and AJ to hear how a lifetime of devotion to Mormon exaltation turned into what they call “grinding for godhood”—a relentless pursuit of worthiness, temple marriage, and eternal approval. Their story reveals the hidden pressure of a works-based faith and sets the stage for how God began to unravel everything they thought was true.

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The Unveiling Mormonism podcast pulls back the curtain on Mormon history, culture and doctrine. Join us for new episodes every Monday.

Find resources to talk about these episodes at pursueGOD.org/mormonism.

Help others go "full circle" as a follower of Jesus through our 12-week Pursuit series.

Click here to learn more about how to use these resources at home, with a small group, or in a one-on-one discipleship relationship.

Got questions or want to leave a note? Email us at [email protected].

Donate Now

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Check out Brandi's Book: The Journey to Jesus: Finding Christ after Leaving Mormonism

In this episode, Bryan talks with Brandi and AJ, two former Mormons who were fully committed to their faith from childhood. Brandi introduces a phrase that captures their experience perfectly: “grinding for godhood.” It describes a life shaped by striving—keeping covenants, qualifying for temple blessings, and doing everything necessary to reach exaltation.

Brandi explains that from a young age she believed her purpose was to tap into her divine nature and eventually become like God. This wasn’t driven by ego or a desire to be worshiped. It felt like obligation—this is what I was created for, and I have to take it seriously.

AJ felt the same pressure. The temple represented the ultimate goal: exaltation, eternal family, and eternal progression. Getting to the temple—and staying worthy—was everything.

For Brandi, godhood wasn’t just a “male” idea. She fully expected to become like a “Heavenly Mother,” even though Heavenly Mother was rarely discussed in Mormonism. Eternity was tied to temple marriage, which meant finding the right husband wasn’t optional—it was essential.

That belief raised the stakes on dating, college decisions, and life itself.

AJ grew up in Utah, where Mormonism was normal and rarely questioned. Brandi grew up in California, constantly interacting with non-Mormons and Christians who challenged her beliefs. Instead of weakening her faith, that pressure made her more confident and outspoken.

Brandi actively debated theology, defended the Restoration, and gave Book of Mormons to friends and teachers—believing she was sharing something life-changing.

At BYU Provo, the urgency intensified. Brandi describes the dating culture as competitive and stressful. Being single as a junior or senior felt like failure. Marriage wasn’t just about love—it was about eternity.

When Brandi and AJ began dating, the pressure followed them into engagement. Brandi admits she feared something tragic might happen before they were sealed in the temple. Eternity felt fragile, dependent on timing, worthiness, and obedience.

Brandi explains receiving her endowment and garments—milestones she had looked forward to for years. They symbolized progress toward exaltation. Yet at the same time, she felt uncomfortable with the legalism and image-driven culture she saw in Utah Mormonism.

She loved Mormon theology and the idea of living the “higher law,” but she also felt suffocated by expectations to look perfect and hide weakness.

Neither Brandi nor AJ were looking to leave Mormonism. They loved it. Their families were all in. But cracks began to form.

AJ’s started when he learned about blood atonement in a BYU religion class—something he had never heard despite years in the church. It forced him to reconsider the claim that prophets would never teach error.

Brandi’s concerns began with leadership decisions and perceived contradictions. Those questions eventually led them to consider researching issues more deeply—something they had been taught to avoid.

They describe that moment as frightening and disorienting. Looking outside approved sources felt wrong, even sinful. But once they started asking honest questions, everything changed.

The episode ends on a cliffhanger as Brandi and AJ stand at the edge of a journey they never planned to take.

We live in a culture obsessed with control. Hustle harder. Plan smarter. Pray longer. If you do all the right things, life should cooperate. That’s the promise of hustle culture—and it’s incredibly seductive.

But Ecclesiastes offers a brutally honest response.

As we close our Ecclesiastes series, Qoheleth—the Teacher—pulls back the curtain on the illusion of control. Life “under the sun” is not a machine we operate; it’s a mystery we inhabit. And the more we try to control it, the more frustrated and disillusioned we become.

Earlier in the book, Qoheleth introduced us to two key ideas that shape everything else. First, his name—Qoheleth—means “Teacher,” the one who gathers people to tell the truth. Second, the word hevel—often translated “meaningless”—literally means vapor. Life is fleeting, unstable, and impossible to grasp.

Pleasure is hevel.

Wealth is hevel.

They’re not sins. They’re not gods. They’re gifts—but terrible masters.

In this final message, Ecclesiastes confronts three unavoidable realities of life: the uncontrollables.

We live under the illusion that we are in charge—especially in American culture. Ecclesiastes says otherwise.

Ecclesiastes 7:13–14 (NLT) says, “Accept the way God does things, for who can straighten what he has made crooked?”

The hardest truth for control-oriented people is this: God is God, and we are not.

Scripture teaches that God is sovereign—not just aware of events, but actively holding the universe together and directing history toward His purposes. Sometimes God acts directly. Sometimes He allows human choices. But even when He permits something, He never loses control.

God is the primary cause—the one with the plan and the power.

Humans are secondary causes—we make real choices with real responsibility.

The bottom line is humbling: you are not the scriptwriter of your life.

We assume life is a meritocracy—that the fastest, smartest, and hardest-working people always win. Ecclesiastes dismantles that assumption.

Ecclesiastes 9:11 (NLT) says, “The fastest runner doesn’t always win the race… It is all decided by chance, by being in the right place at the right time.”

Timing matters. Circumstances matter. Opportunity matters.

This doesn’t mean effort is pointless. In fact, Ecclesiastes affirms wisdom and preparation.

Ecclesiastes 10:10 (NLT) says, “Using a dull ax requires great strength, so sharpen the blade.”

Sharpen the blade. Work hard. Be wise.

But even then, outcomes are never guaranteed.

Ecclesiastes doesn’t call us to quit trying—it calls us to stop pretending we’re in control.

Some people are better at predicting the future than others. Many of them are rich. But it’s still a guess.

Ecclesiastes is clear: the future is unknowable, and death is unavoidable.

Ecclesiastes 8:7–8 (NLT) says, “No one really knows what is going to happen… None of us can hold back our spirit from departing.”

No amount of money, innovation, or optimism can stop time—or death. The human mortality rate remains a steady 100%.

That reality sounds dark until we realize what Ecclesiastes is doing: stripping away false hope so we can find real hope.

If we can’t control the Creator, the consequences, or the clock—what can we control?

Ecclesiastes ends with clarity.

Ecclesiastes 12:13–14 (NLT) says, “Fear God and obey his commands, for this is everyone’s duty.”

You can control your response to God.

Not your parents’ faith.

Not your spouse’s obedience.

Not your pastor’s integrity.

Yours.

To fear God means more than being afraid. It means awe, reverence, humility, and trust. And obedience naturally flows from that posture—not because outcomes are guaranteed, but because God is worthy.

Qoheleth lived “under the sun”—under the law, under the cycle, under the shadow of death. He didn’t see the full picture.

But we do.

Jesus stepped directly into the uncontrollables. He entered a world of chance, suffering, and death. He took the judgment Ecclesiastes warns about. He broke the cycle we couldn’t escape.

Life under the sun finds its answer in the Son.

The brutal honesty of Ecclesiastes doesn’t lead to despair—it leads to trust.

Your duty isn’t to be in control.

It’s to live in submission to the One who already is.

Welcome back to the podcast!

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The PursueGOD Truth podcast is the “easy button” for making disciples – whether you’re looking for resources to lead a family devotional, a small group at church, or a one-on-one mentoring relationship. Join us for new episodes every Tuesday and Friday.

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Today we're discussing part 7 in our 12-week Discipleship series with hosts Bryan Dwyer and Ross Anderson. Getting to your defining moment of faith is more than the end of your old life; it’s the beginning of a new one! Baptism is a symbol of that new life.

In this lesson we’ll learn 5 reasons why Christians should get baptized.