Dani has always wanted to live alone. Now, at 28, she’s living the dream. She owns her condo and doesn’t foresee needing a roommate. But looking ahead at the rest of her life, she’s a little worried about what she sees. If she lives alone forever, is she closing the door on an important kind of intimacy and support? 

With help from a song from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend and a scene from Friends, Dani, Vanessa, and Casper explore society’s expectations around partnership, family and long-term relationships.

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A few years ago, Lindsay left an abusive relationship. Since then she has almost completely cut her abuser out of her life. But there’s one friend they still share - and that friend is getting married. Lindsay has never talked to her friend about the abuse. But now, with her ex likely invited to the wedding, questions are coming up: Should she tell her friend about the abuse? What if he doesn’t believe her? Or still wants her abuser at his wedding? 

With help from In the Dream House by Carmen Maria Machado and Hunger by Roxane Gay, Lindsay, Vanessa and Casper discuss strategies for how to be vulnerable when you don’t know how a hard conversation will go. 

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If you or someone you know is experiencing intimate partner violence, The National Domestic Violence Hotline has great resources and are available 24/7 help.

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Ruth has been a woman their whole life, but that label has never quite felt right. Recently they had an experience where a stranger gendered them “wrongly” and it felt amazing. Since then they’ve been wondering, should they identify as non-binary? 

With help from Shakespeare’s Twelfth Night and an article by Tre’vell Anderson, Ruth, Vanessa, and Casper explore the confines of gendered language and the possibilities we have to expand it. 

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Maya Gosh has been in pain for years. She’s been going to doctors, trying to figure out what's going on with her body, but nobody seems to think anything is wrong with her. And lately she’s started to feel like the whole process of trying to get good healthcare is more painful emotionally and psychologically than the physical pain she’s in. Should she stop trying and protect her mental health? Or is that giving up?

With help from Mythbusters and the Liverpool Football Club, Maya, Vanessa and Casper discuss everything that's at stake in trying to get a diagnosis.

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We are so grateful to our supporters on Patreon who make this show possible. If you can, please considering chipping in!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Last fall, Sophie Clark broke up with her long-term partner and it was one of the hardest things she’s ever done. Trying to organize her grief, she began a weekly ritual - lighting candles and journaling about the break-up. But now, several months later, the ritual is feeling a little flat. What can she do to reimagine her practice to better fit where she is now in the grief process? 

With help from Jane Eyre and a William Prince song, Sophie, Vanessa and Casper explore what kind of thoughts and feelings surround a big break-up and what it means to heal. 

At the end of today’s episode, you’ll hear an original song by Sophie! You can hear more of her music here.

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We are so grateful to our supporters on Patreon who make this show possible. If you can, please considering chipping in!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Dana Schwartz is a #1 New York Times Best Selling author (go read her new book!), top charting podcaster, and Twitter super-star. But still, she sometimes finds herself looking at other writers with feelings of professional jealousy. She doesn’t like that feeling when it comes up, but she doesn’t know what to do about it. 

With help from Nick Jonas and the movie Amadeus, Dana, Vanessa and Casper explore how feelings of inadequacy often lead to jealousy. 

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If you’re interested in joining Dana and Vanessa on our upcoming Frankenstein pilgrimage, there are still spots available! 

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Happy holidays! We're dropping in your feeds to share some news about the future of the show.

If you’re interested in being on the show, please fill out this form and we’ll start contacting people in the new year. 

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Vanessa's step-daughter is *very* cool. But...is that a good thing? And what is coolness really?

With help from West Side Story and Gone Girl, Vanessa and Casper explore the social capital and social manipulation of coolness.

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We are so grateful to our supporters on Patreon who make this show possible. If you can, please considering chipping in

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We got so many questions for our "bad chaplaincy" episode last month, we decided we needed another round! This week, Casper and Vanessa answer your questions about work, exes, and how to know when you're on the right path.

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We are so grateful to our supporters on Patreon who make this show possible. If you can, please considering chipping in!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Casper's life is on a path and generally he's pretty happy with how it's going. But every so often, he likes to fantasize about what it would look like to step off that path. What if, instead of living his normal life, he went on an adventure? What if he spent months traveling the world? Is that just a fantasy or is it something he can really do?

With help from Under the Tuscan Sun and Mary Oliver, Casper and Vanessa explore the fear and excitement tied up with choosing something new.

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We are so grateful to our supporters on Patreon who make this show possible. If you can, please considering chipping in!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.