Have you ever wished there were ways to step AROUND the argument instead of going THROUGH it? Ever feel like attempts to resolve disagreements just leads to conflict and hurt feelings that never really accomplish anything?

This episode is for you.

In Relationship Judo, I talk about ways to seek true resolution and repair when we disagree with our partners. It's not that we can't disagree or that we sometimes do things that hurt each other. This is the real world, right?

BUT

We can seek ways to resolve our differences and heal our injuries without falling into the old traps - criticism and defensiveness, shaming, gaslighting, etc. We can find resolution and repair in more effective and authentic ways.

How? What is this magic?

It's not magic, but it is a bit of Relationship Judo. If you want to know more, check out today's show!

Check out the Being Well podcast with Dr. Rick Hanson and Forrest Hanson

Get Buddha's Brain by Dr. Rick Hanson.

Get Nonviolent Communication by Dr. Marshall Rosenberg.
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Chris Neal (he/him) is an integrative psychotherapist, educator, and host of The Resilient Self podcast. A former university professor, he brings over 25 years of experience inspiring others to grow and succeed. In addition to his private psychotherapy practice, he presents workshops for organizations seeking to enhance member wellness and fully embody the stated organizational values.

A Licensed Professional Counselor in the State of Texas, Chris sees adult individuals and couples for a range of concerns in his private psychotherapy practice . His primary practice areas include relational work on boundaries and codependency, stress management, and helping couples build mutually supportive relationships.

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Check out our website at https://theresilientself.com for more great content!

Our theme music is by Ted Hammond. Check out Ted’s music on iTunes or Amazon Music.

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This week’s guest is Kyira Wackett. Kyira is a licensed mental health therapist, coach, YouTube creator, and consultant who specializes in working with shame and anxiety. 

 We talk about Kyira’s work and she helps us think about shame in new and important ways. We also spend a little time deconstructing the latest Ted Lasso plot twists, which was a lot of fun too.
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Kyira Wackett is a licensed mental health therapist specializing in shame and anxiety. She is the owner of Adversity Rising, a company who equips people with the confidence and skills to write their own stories. Her work ranges from one on one coaching to corporate wellness packages with a focus on what she calls the anti-band-aid movement or resisting the quick fix in favor of doing the work necessary to make meaningful and sustainable change. The highlight of her work is her signature program, That Life AR, where she walks people through her 5-step therapeutic process she believes can combat any pain point that comes our way because we all deserve to live a life in which we can thrive.

• Website: www.adversityrising.com
• YouTube: www.youtube.com/@adversityrising

Check out our website at https://theresilientself.com for more great content!

Our theme music is by Ted Hammond. Check out Ted’s music on iTunes or Amazon Music.

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I’m excited to bring you today’s interview with author, hypnotherapist, and coach Joseph Bennett.

 We talk about Joseph’s work helping people slow down and choose to engage in meaningful periods rest. We talk about his popular book, Rest: The Art of Doing Less, and he also tells us about his newly released book, When in Doubt.

 I think you’ll enjoy the positive and uplifting energy Joseph brings to this week’s show. So here’s my conversation with Joseph Bennett… 

Joseph's website

Joseph's LinkTree

Get Rest: The Art of Doing Less

Get When in Doubt

Joseph Bennett is an improv actor, author, poet, podcaster, co-founder of Joseph Bennett is an improv actor, author, poet, podcaster, co-founder of San Miguel Retreats, assemblage artist and an inspiring creativity coach. His podcast Are You Waiting for Permission? has been downloaded more than 13,000 times and listeners have described it as "motivating, inspiring...heartfelt and enriching."

Joseph's next book When in Doubt—Nearly 400 funny, insightful & inspiring ideas for what to do when you're in doubt was recently released.

Check out our website at https://theresilientself.com for more great content!

Our theme music is by Ted Hammond. Check out Ted’s music on iTunes or Amazon Music.

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This week, we have Licensed Social Worker and author, Joey Pagano, who describes his years-long battle with addiction. He tells his story of resilience and healing that eventually led him not only to recovery, but also to becoming a leader in his community in helping others discover the road to recovery.

He details his story and talks about his powerful perspective on helping those who struggle with addiction in his new book, No Addict Left Behind: It’s a Recovery Medicine State of Mind.

Please be aware that this episode includes candid conversation about some very difficult life challenges, and may not be suitable for young listeners.


Joey Pagano's Website

Joey's LinkedIn

Joey's Instagram

Joey's Facebook 

Joey Pagano, MSW, LSW, CRS is a father of two, husband, and brother. Most importantly, he is a person in long-term recovery who brings the same personal principles such as empathy, compassion, and understanding that recovery teaches into his relationships and professional clinical roles.

Joey has years of experience as a mental health and drug and alcohol therapist, as well as a licensed social worker (LSW) and certified recovery, family, and forensic specialist with over a decade of overall experience in the field. He serves on a multidisciplinary clinical and peer drug and alcohol treatment teams and currently supervises a Center of Excellence (which coordinates care for >550 clients with OUD and mental illness). He is trained in motivational interviewing, trauma-informed practice, and the American Society on Addiction Medicine (ASAM) assessment criteria. He has published research manuscripts in social work and taught various behavioral health presentations throughout the country.

Joey is an author of three books, with the third co-written with Scott A. Cook MD, MPH about the clinical, medical and personal experiences of the stigma of addiction and recovery medicine in our country. No addict left behind: It’s a recovery medicine state of mind was released on 4/25/23, in stores and online. He speaks professionally about the clinical implications of recovery and social work. Joey is also an educator and is currently pursuing his Doctor of Social Work (DSW).

Check out our website at https://theresilientself.com for more great content!

Our theme music is by Ted Hammond. Check out Ted’s music on iTunes or Amazon Music.

[Note: Links may be affiliate links. You will pay the same price, but we may receive a commission that helps support publication of The Resilient Self.]

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This week, I welcome Dr. Heidi Kay Begay. Heidi is a wonderful flutist and teacher, and produces two separate podcasts: the Flute 360 Podcast and the Pivoting Musician Podcast.

Heidi chose to enter one of the most competitive careers in all of Classical Music, becoming a professional flutist and professor. She got a Doctor of Musical Arts in Flute Performance, and began the process of kickstarting a career as an artist-teacher.

After years of commitment, her dream job was upended by the Pandemic. Heidi made the choice to reinvent her professional identity, moving into content creation and online coaching and teaching.

She’s here today to talk about the pivot - that choice to take your career, and ultimately, your professional identity, in a new direction. We also discuss the challenges of creating an online business and how families seek to create financial wellness by cultivating additional income streams.

I know you’ll be inspired by her story, and we  have a great time talking about her experience as an online entrepreneur.

Dr. Heidi Kay Begay is passionate about guiding the modern-day musician to find their unique voice on and off the stage.

Heidi is the owner of two thriving companies, which include J&K Media Productions and Flute 360. Through her entrepreneurial portfolio, she wears many different hats, which include being an educator, flutist, coach, and podcaster.

She is the creator and host of two current podcasts. The first is Flute 360, which has received over 100,000 downloads since 2018 and has served flutists worldwide through its 225+ episodes. The second podcast includes The Pivoting Musician, which Heidi co-hosts with her colleague, Dr. Garrett Hope.

Throughout her business, she serves her clientele through different offerings, such as music lessons, coaching sessions, and her three digital courses, which include The Pivoting Musician, The Podcasting Musician, and Generating Income as a Podcaster Through Corporate Sponsorships.

Heidi is thrilled to work with musicians to reach new heights, so they can feel empowered and have a life they love both on and off the stage. To learn more about Heidi, please visit her website at https://heidikaybegay.com.

 
Check out our website at https://theresilientself.com for more great content!

Our theme music is by Ted Hammond. Check out Ted’s music on iTunes or Amazon Music.

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We’re following up on last week’s show about starting therapy with Australian psychologist and author Yelena Fishman. Yelena is the author of the book, What’s Normal Anyway?

In our conversation, we hear Yelena’s amazing story of immigrating as a child with her family from a Soviet state to Israel, and she discusses what it was like to adapt not only to a new location, but also to new language and cultural understandings.

She describes the unlikely circumstances that led to her becoming a psychologist, and tells us about her wonderful book and how it can uplift and inspire anyone who’s struggled with “feeling normal” in these truly uncommon times.

Buy "What's Normal Anyway?" on Amazon

Yelena Fishman's website

Check out our website at https://theresilientself.com for more great content!

Our theme music is by Ted Hammond. Check out Ted’s music on iTunes or Amazon Music.

[Note: Links may be affiliate links. You will pay the same price, but we may receive a commission that helps support publication of The Resilient Self.]

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Today Chris talks about the process of starting therapy. From the decision to being to how to find the right therapist for you. This episode explains it all.

We go through the whole process:

• When/Why to start therapy
• How to choose the right therapist for you
• How to pay for therapy
• How to get started with someone
• What to do if you're not sure you've chosen the right mental health counselor

Links

Psychology Today

Check out our website at https://theresilientself.com for more great content!

Our theme music is by Ted Hammond. Check out Ted’s music on iTunes or Amazon Music.

[Note: Links may be affiliate links. You will pay the same price, but we may receive a commission that helps support publication of The Resilient Self.]

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Did you know you can teach your brain to make different brain wave patterns? When done properly, this process can improve cognitive functioning in several important ways, including how me manage sleep, stress, and attention.

Today Chris welcomes neuroscientist Dr. Andrew Hill to discuss optimizing brain performance. Dr. Hill describes the history and process of neurofeedback brain training, and explains what it means to be a functional neuroscientist.  

Dr. Hill answers several important questions about neurofeedback as he the research basis for this work and ways he's helped countless people reach their goals:

• What is neurofeedback training?
• How was eeg neurofeedback invented?
• Does neurofeedback work?
• How does neurofeedback work?
• What are the long term effects?

He also explains the effectiveness of neurofeedback and how many of his clients can actually get better results training remotely. This means you don't have to live in a location with a Peak Brain Institute. Dr. Hill tells us how his expert staff coaches remote, home-based clients to get results.

Mention The Resilient Self Podcast and get $250 off brain mapping memberships or training package costs at Peak Brain Institute!

Peak Brain Institute 

ISNR ( the International Society for Neurofeedback and Research)

Guest Bio
Dr. Andrew Hill is the founder of Peak Brain Institute and a leading neurofeedback practitioner and biohacking coach for clients worldwide. He has lectured on psychology, neuroscience, and gerontology at UCLA’s Department of Psychology where he received a PhD in Cognitive Neuroscience.

At Peak Brain, Dr. Hill provides individualized training programs to help you optimize your brain across goals of stress, sleep, attention, brain fog, creativity, and athletic performance. He is the host of the Head First podcast and continues to do research on attention and cognitive performance. 

Check out our website at https://theresilientself.com for more great content!

Our theme music is by Ted Hammond. Check out Ted’s music on iTunes or Amazon Music.

[Note: Links may be affiliate links. You will pay the same price, but we may receive a commission that helps support publication of The Resilient Self.]

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In this episode, Chris interviews Rev. Dr. Shannon Fleck, Executive Director of the Oklahoma Faith Network (formerly the Oklahoma Conference of Churches). Shannon works to bring people of all faiths together to promote inclusion and understanding through activities such as the recent No Hate in the Heartland initiative. 

Shannon’s passion and commitment are evident from the beginning. We discuss a wide range of topics, including:

• Her experiences studying and working as a young female religious leader, including ways she encountered gender discrimination and misogyny within faith communities.
• We talked about leadership and power structures, and the intersection of politics and religion. Shannon talks specifically about th e influence of Christian Nationalism on life in and outside the church.
• She shares her own struggles as a young female religious leader. 
• We also talked candidly about shame triggers in some faith communities, and what Shannon has to say to people who have strayed from the church.
• We also discuss the tremendous ways faith communities can promote resilience and belonging.

I know you’ll want to learn more about Shannon and her work in the Oklahoma Faith Network after hearing this candid and honest discussion.

The Oklahoma Faith Network: OKFaith.org

Shannon Fleck Instagram

Shannon Fleck Twitter

Guest Bio

The Rev. Dr. Shannon Fleck, an Oklahoma native, became OCC’s Executive Director in June 2018. She was ordained by the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) in 2011.

Fleck was elevated to Executive Director after serving as OCC Director of Program Development from May 2017 to June 2018. 

She has a passion for social justice and interfaith relations, both core components of the OFN mission. 

Prior to her current position, Fleck served as the Central Christian Church Associate Minister in Enid, Oklahoma. There, she was instrumental in initiating several community outreach programs.

She continues that work with OFN by initiating such meaningful movements at the No Hate in the Heartland Initiative and a formal anti-racism/anti-discrimination platform.

Dr. Fleck was selected for the 2017 Human Rights Award from Church Women United. And was a recipient of the 40 Under 40 recognition in 2018 by the Oklahoma Gazette.

She spent her childhood in Guthrie, where she graduated high school before earning a Bachelor of Arts in Sociology from the University of Central Oklahoma, Edmond.

Following college, she spent two years with the Oklahoma Office of Juvenile Affairs. She entered Phillips Theological Seminary in Tulsa, Oklahoma, where she was the Matthew Thompson Fellow. There she was the recipient of the Sojourner Award; the Interpreter’s Award and multiple book awards along with serving in the Phillips Student Senate. 

Dr. Fleck graduated with her Doctor of Ministry Degree from Candler School of Theology at Emory University in May of 2021 with a focus on Leadership and Community Witness.

Check out our website at https://theresilientself.com for more great content!

Our theme music is by Ted Hammond. Check out Ted’s music on iTunes or Amazon Music.

[Note: Links may be affiliate links. You will pay the same price, but we may receive a commission that helps support publication of The Resilient Self.]

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Let's be honest, making real change is harder than it sounds! Even when you're motivated, there are forces at work that tend to pull you back into old habits.  In this episode, Chris talks about this issue and helps you find ways to reach those personal growth goals.

Book recommendations:

Atomic Habits by James Clear

Daring Greatly by Brene Brown - This one is a CLASSIC!

Brene Brown TED Talks:

The Power of Vulnerability

Listening to Shame

Check out our website at https://theresilientself.com for more great content!

Our theme music is by Ted Hammond. Check out Ted’s music on iTunes or Amazon Music.

[Note: Links may be affiliate links. You will pay the same price, but we may receive a commission that helps support publication of The Resilient Self.]

Support the show

Support the show