All behavior is communication, even PARENT behavior. When we feel triggered or explode for no logical reason -- it's likely that we have trapped emotion coming to the surface. Talesha Carter, is going to share how we UN-TRAP that emotion & how do we help our kids do the same.

Emotions are energy in motion. If you take anything that has energy, like a thought, vibration, feeling -- all of that combined together can become trapped in the body.

⋒ SHOW NOTES: xolaurenpace.com/xoparenting

⋒ FACEBOOK GROUP: facebook.com/groups/xoparenting

Sign up for 2-week or 4-week parent coaching for 10% off with code XOPARENTINGPODCAST, xolaurenpace.com/coaching

_____________________________________

If you're new to me, I'm Lauren Pace. Mom of two (one on the way). I have a Master's Degree in Child Development with research in challenging behavior. I have worked as a behavior coach online, in classrooms, and in homes.

Talking about child development & challenging behavior fires me up with so much passion and my goal is to help parents all over the world.

I love helping parents understand their children, see hard behavior through new lenses & strengthen their relationships.

_____________________________________

Find Talesha

Taleshakim.com

Facebook: Talesha Kim

IG: Instagram.com/taleshakim

Family Culture is made up of the unwritten rules. The things that the [insert last name] do. It’s what relationships look like And what this family does when no one else is watching.

We spend so much time planning for the wedding, college, vacation, first day of school… that sometimes we overlook the day-to-day. The tiny moments, interactions, patterns, and habits that are actually shaping our children's world view. The day-to-day is where you will find the family culture.

Our traditions, the days we value, the activities we participate in, who cleans, who cooks, how we talk about our neighbors, how we look at strangers. The affection we show and the way we resolve conflicts. All of these little things are part of the way our children see the world.

Strong families don’t happen by accident. It’s intentional.

Family culture isn’t how big our house is or how many toys we buy. It isn’t how many activities we sign them up for or what our favorite meals are. Family culture is the values, priorities, habits, and experiences we choose for our family. 

It’s the atmosphere of our homes. 

It’s what makes our families unique.

1. What do we want for our child long term? aka When our kids leave the home, who do we want them to be?

2. How can we help them develop this?

-- Pick 5 Values that you want for your child long-term.

-- Go through each value and ask the question, how can we help them develop this?

⋒ SHOW NOTES: xolaurenpace.com/xoparenting

⋒ FACEBOOK GROUP: facebook.com/groups/xoparenting

Sign up for 2-week or 4-week parent coaching for 10% off with code XOPARENTINGPODCAST, xolaurenpace.com/coaching

_____________________________________

If you're new to me, I'm Lauren Pace. Mom of two (one on the way). I have a Master's Degree in Child Development with research in challenging behavior. I have worked as a behavior coach online, in classrooms, and in homes.

Talking about child development & challenging behavior fires me up with so much passion and my goal is to help parents all over the world.

I love helping parents understand their children, see hard behavior through new lenses & strengthen their relationships.

_____________________________________

Family Culture is made up of the unwritten rules. The things that the [insert last name] do. It’s what relationships look like And what this family does when no one else is watching.

We spend so much time planning for the wedding, college, vacation, first day of school… that sometimes we overlook the day-to-day. The tiny moments, interactions, patterns, and habits that are actually shaping our children's world view. The day-to-day is where you will find the family culture.

Our traditions, the days we value, the activities we participate in, who cleans, who cooks, how we talk about our neighbors, how we look at strangers. The affection we show and the way we resolve conflicts. All of these little things are part of the way our children see the world.

Strong families don’t happen by accident. It’s intentional.

Family culture isn’t how big our house is or how many toys we buy. It isn’t how many activities we sign them up for or what our favorite meals are. Family culture is the values, priorities, habits, and experiences we choose for our family. 

It’s the atmosphere of our homes. 

It’s what makes our families unique.

1. What do we want for our child long term? aka When our kids leave the home, who do we want them to be?

2. How can we help them develop this?

-- Pick 5 Values that you want for your child long-term.

-- Go through each value and ask the question, how can we help them develop this?

⋒ SHOW NOTES: xolaurenpace.com/xoparenting

⋒ FACEBOOK GROUP: facebook.com/groups/xoparenting

Sign up for 2-week or 4-week parent coaching for 10% off with code XOPARENTINGPODCAST, xolaurenpace.com/coaching

_____________________________________

If you're new to me, I'm Lauren Pace. Mom of two (one on the way). I have a Master's Degree in Child Development with research in challenging behavior. I have worked as a behavior coach online, in classrooms, and in homes.

Talking about child development & challenging behavior fires me up with so much passion and my goal is to help parents all over the world.

I love helping parents understand their children, see hard behavior through new lenses & strengthen their relationships.

_____________________________________

Dr. Brittan Barker has professional and personal experience with person-centered care and ADVOCATING for your child who needs extra support.

Dr. Barker talks about how to advocate for your child, the process from assessment to intervention, and the REALNESS of how exhausting it can be.

🌟SCHOOL-AGE FREE SUPPORT PROCESS🌟

Write a formal letter

Get a psycho-social educational evaluation free

Parents will be given a packet of test results

Meeting with the family

Move forward with IEP (if qualified)

🌟UNDER-THREE FREE SUPPORT PROCESS🌟

Contact your state’s early intervention hotline

Get evaluated for free in your home by professionals

Get IFSP support (if qualified — pay scale may apply)

"Parents need to take care of themselves just as much as their kids and there's nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed or feel guilty about these are our kids and they happened here for very specific and special reasons and it's our job as parents to support them just as we would if they were learning to ride a bike."

FIND MORE FROM BRITTAN

The easiest way to find out more about Brittan and some of the work she does, especially our research would be at our Labs website. Her lab at Utah State is called the Aural Rehabilitation Lab. USU’s Rehabilitation specifically supports rehabilitation for people who are affected by hearing loss.

Website is www.BrittanBarker.com.

Instagram @auralrehablab

WEBSITE SUPPORTS

- Institute for Patient- and Family-Centered Care https://www.ipfcc.org/bestpractices/sustainable-partnerships/background/pfcc-defined.html

- Dr. Barker’ Aural Rehabilitation Lab at USU www.brittanbarker.com

- Baby Watch Early Intervention program for children aged 0-3 years who live in Utah http://health.utah.gov/cshcn/programs/babywatch.html

- How to find an early intervention program for children aged 0-3 years in your state (English) https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/actearly/parents/states.html

- How to find an early intervention program for children aged 0-3 years in your state (Spanish) https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/spanish/actearly/parents/intervencionTemprana.html

- How to request an initial evaluation for special education services for your elementary school-aged child (with model letter; English) https://www.parentcenterhub.org/evaluation-2/

- How to request an initial evaluation for special education services for your elementary school-aged child (with model letter; Spanish) https://www.parentcenterhub.org/carta-evaluacion/

- What is an IFSP? https://www.understood.org/en/learning-thinking-differences/treatments-approaches/early-intervention/ifsp-what-it-is-and-how-it-works

- What is an IEP? https://www.understood.org/en/school-learning/special-services/ieps/understanding-individualized-education-programs

⋒ SHOW NOTES: xolaurenpace.com/xoparenting

⋒ FACEBOOK GROUP: facebook.com/groups/xoparenting

Sign up for 2-week or 4-week parent coaching for 10% off with code XOPARENTINGPODCAST, xolaurenpace.com/coaching

_____________________________________

If you're new to me, I'm Lauren Pace. Mom of two (one on the way). I have a Master's Degree in Child Development with research in challenging behavior. I have worked as a behavior coach online, in classrooms, and in homes.

Talking about child development & challenging behavior fires me up with so much passion and my goal is to help parents all over the world.

I love helping parents understand their children, see hard behavior through new lenses & strengthen their relationships.

_____________________________________

Dr. Brittan Barker has professional and personal experience with person-centered care and ADVOCATING for your child who needs extra support.

Dr. Barker talks about how to advocate for your child, the process from assessment to intervention, and the REALNESS of how exhausting it can be.

🌟SCHOOL-AGE FREE SUPPORT PROCESS🌟

Write a formal letter

Get a psycho-social educational evaluation free

Parents will be given a packet of test results

Meeting with the family

Move forward with IEP (if qualified)

🌟UNDER-THREE FREE SUPPORT PROCESS🌟

Contact your state’s early intervention hotline

Get evaluated for free in your home by professionals

Get IFSP support (if qualified — pay scale may apply)

"Parents need to take care of themselves just as much as their kids and there's nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed or feel guilty about these are our kids and they happened here for very specific and special reasons and it's our job as parents to support them just as we would if they were learning to ride a bike."

FIND MORE FROM BRITTAN

The easiest way to find out more about Brittan and some of the work she does, especially our research would be at our Labs website. Her lab at Utah State is called the Aural Rehabilitation Lab. USU’s Rehabilitation specifically supports rehabilitation for people who are affected by hearing loss.

Website is www.BrittanBarker.com.

Instagram @auralrehablab

WEBSITE SUPPORTS

- Institute for Patient- and Family-Centered Care https://www.ipfcc.org/bestpractices/sustainable-partnerships/background/pfcc-defined.html

- Dr. Barker’ Aural Rehabilitation Lab at USU www.brittanbarker.com

- Baby Watch Early Intervention program for children aged 0-3 years who live in Utah http://health.utah.gov/cshcn/programs/babywatch.html

- How to find an early intervention program for children aged 0-3 years in your state (English) https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/actearly/parents/states.html

- How to find an early intervention program for children aged 0-3 years in your state (Spanish) https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/spanish/actearly/parents/intervencionTemprana.html

- How to request an initial evaluation for special education services for your elementary school-aged child (with model letter; English) https://www.parentcenterhub.org/evaluation-2/

- How to request an initial evaluation for special education services for your elementary school-aged child (with model letter; Spanish) https://www.parentcenterhub.org/carta-evaluacion/

- What is an IFSP? https://www.understood.org/en/learning-thinking-differences/treatments-approaches/early-intervention/ifsp-what-it-is-and-how-it-works

- What is an IEP? https://www.understood.org/en/school-learning/special-services/ieps/understanding-individualized-education-programs

⋒ SHOW NOTES: xolaurenpace.com/xoparenting

⋒ FACEBOOK GROUP: facebook.com/groups/xoparenting

Sign up for 2-week or 4-week parent coaching for 10% off with code XOPARENTINGPODCAST, xolaurenpace.com/coaching

_____________________________________

If you're new to me, I'm Lauren Pace. Mom of two (one on the way). I have a Master's Degree in Child Development with research in challenging behavior. I have worked as a behavior coach online, in classrooms, and in homes.

Talking about child development & challenging behavior fires me up with so much passion and my goal is to help parents all over the world.

I love helping parents understand their children, see hard behavior through new lenses & strengthen their relationships.

_____________________________________

Today I'm going to talk to you guys about something called the “Safe Place.”

So the safe place is actually something that I get the most negative comments about. In fact, it's the topic that I get the ONLY negative comments about. I seriously don't get very many negative comments about the stuff that I teach, except for this so on Instagram, Facebook, and on my blog I've gotten comments before and I'll share some of those as the episode goes on.

I am going to tell you about the strategy, how it works, and why it's actually one of the best things you can teach your child contrary to the misinformed commenters.

First and foremost, we do NOT do timeouts in our home. So timeouts typically go like this: you either have a Time Out Chair, time-out Corner, or they have to sit in a certain place for a certain amount of time. The expectation is that as soon as they come out of a timeout, they should be behaving well. Timeouts that aren't effective usually result in Slammed doors, yelling frustrated parents doing whatever they can to get the results that they want, and not knowing any other possible way. It's just so common to do at timeouts.

So what we do might look like a time out to your natural eye, but I'm going to explain how it's different.

Read the blog: https://xolaurenpace.com/blog/2020/5/26/4g67t7yo2lr7dpm83c7flvtp3y4rgl

⋒ SHOW NOTES: xolaurenpace.com/xoparenting

⋒ FACEBOOK GROUP: facebook.com/groups/xoparenting

Sign up for 2-week or 4-week parent coaching for 10% off with code XOPARENTINGPODCAST, xolaurenpace.com/coaching

_____________________________________

If you're new to me, I'm Lauren Pace. Mom of two (one on the way). I have a Master's Degree in Child Development with research in challenging behavior. I have worked as a behavior coach online, in classrooms, and in homes.

Talking about child development & challenging behavior fires me up with so much passion and my goal is to help parents all over the world.

I love helping parents understand their children, see hard behavior through new lenses & strengthen their relationships.

_____________________________________

Today I'm going to talk to you guys about something called the “Safe Place.”

So the safe place is actually something that I get the most negative comments about. In fact, it's the topic that I get the ONLY negative comments about. I seriously don't get very many negative comments about the stuff that I teach, except for this so on Instagram, Facebook, and on my blog I've gotten comments before and I'll share some of those as the episode goes on.

I am going to tell you about the strategy, how it works, and why it's actually one of the best things you can teach your child contrary to the misinformed commenters.

First and foremost, we do NOT do timeouts in our home. So timeouts typically go like this: you either have a Time Out Chair, time-out Corner, or they have to sit in a certain place for a certain amount of time. The expectation is that as soon as they come out of a timeout, they should be behaving well. Timeouts that aren't effective usually result in Slammed doors, yelling frustrated parents doing whatever they can to get the results that they want, and not knowing any other possible way. It's just so common to do at timeouts.

So what we do might look like a time out to your natural eye, but I'm going to explain how it's different.

Read the blog: https://xolaurenpace.com/blog/2020/5/26/4g67t7yo2lr7dpm83c7flvtp3y4rgl

⋒ SHOW NOTES: xolaurenpace.com/xoparenting

⋒ FACEBOOK GROUP: facebook.com/groups/xoparenting

Sign up for 2-week or 4-week parent coaching for 10% off with code XOPARENTINGPODCAST, xolaurenpace.com/coaching

_____________________________________

If you're new to me, I'm Lauren Pace. Mom of two (one on the way). I have a Master's Degree in Child Development with research in challenging behavior. I have worked as a behavior coach online, in classrooms, and in homes.

Talking about child development & challenging behavior fires me up with so much passion and my goal is to help parents all over the world.

I love helping parents understand their children, see hard behavior through new lenses & strengthen their relationships.

_____________________________________

Ever since Wendy introduced me to sensory, and its effect on behavior, my eyes have been opened. Something that's really stood out to me was one of the sensory things was proprioceptive input and she talked about how we have different preferences. So some of us like to sleep with like heavy blankets on or have tight jeans or whatever and I was like, that is me it changed my life. If I don't have a heavier comforter, I have to put pillows on top of me to get to sleep and so it just helps me figure out my own sensory preferences and calm my body.

The Seven Senses

Imagine that we all have a series of seven cups in us and each cup represents our seven senses. (Yes, there are seven— there's actually nine but we're just going to go into seven cuz the other two are less researched).

So a big cup would mean our body is seeking more of that a little cup is our body only tolerate a little bit of it. So we're going to avoid it most of the time.

Our seven senses are see, hear, taste, touch, smell, proprioception, and vestibular.

Somebody with a large hearing cup would be one who likes to have the music on and they don't mind background noise. They can have a conversation with people without having things bother them noise does not bother them really, and they enjoy the noise.

Somebody with a small hearing cup (which is most moms at like 6 p.m) would be one where loud noise can be really overstimulating or just overpowering and too much.

Find Wendy's workshop here: https://exceptionalparentingpodcast.com/epf-lauren/

Follow here on instagram here: instagram.com/wendybertagnole

⋒ SHOW NOTES: xolaurenpace.com/xoparenting

⋒ FACEBOOK GROUP: facebook.com/groups/xoparenting

Sign up for 2-week or 4-week parent coaching for 10% off with code XOPARENTINGPODCAST, xolaurenpace.com/coaching

_____________________________________

If you're new to me, I'm Lauren Pace. Mom of two (one on the way). I have a Master's Degree in Child Development with research in challenging behavior. I have worked as a behavior coach online, in classrooms, and in homes.

Talking about child development & challenging behavior fires me up with so much passion and my goal is to help parents all over the world.

I love helping parents understand their children, see hard behavior through new lenses & strengthen their relationships.

_____________________________________

Ever since Wendy introduced me to sensory, and its effect on behavior, my eyes have been opened. Something that's really stood out to me was one of the sensory things was proprioceptive input and she talked about how we have different preferences. So some of us like to sleep with like heavy blankets on or have tight jeans or whatever and I was like, that is me it changed my life. If I don't have a heavier comforter, I have to put pillows on top of me to get to sleep and so it just helps me figure out my own sensory preferences and calm my body.

The Seven Senses

Imagine that we all have a series of seven cups in us and each cup represents our seven senses. (Yes, there are seven— there's actually nine but we're just going to go into seven cuz the other two are less researched).

So a big cup would mean our body is seeking more of that a little cup is our body only tolerate a little bit of it. So we're going to avoid it most of the time.

Our seven senses are see, hear, taste, touch, smell, proprioception, and vestibular.

Somebody with a large hearing cup would be one who likes to have the music on and they don't mind background noise. They can have a conversation with people without having things bother them noise does not bother them really, and they enjoy the noise.

Somebody with a small hearing cup (which is most moms at like 6 p.m) would be one where loud noise can be really overstimulating or just overpowering and too much.

Find Wendy's workshop here: https://exceptionalparentingpodcast.com/epf-lauren/

Follow here on instagram here: instagram.com/wendybertagnole

⋒ SHOW NOTES: xolaurenpace.com/xoparenting

⋒ FACEBOOK GROUP: facebook.com/groups/xoparenting

Sign up for 2-week or 4-week parent coaching for 10% off with code XOPARENTINGPODCAST, xolaurenpace.com/coaching

_____________________________________

If you're new to me, I'm Lauren Pace. Mom of two (one on the way). I have a Master's Degree in Child Development with research in challenging behavior. I have worked as a behavior coach online, in classrooms, and in homes.

Talking about child development & challenging behavior fires me up with so much passion and my goal is to help parents all over the world.

I love helping parents understand their children, see hard behavior through new lenses & strengthen their relationships.

_____________________________________

A lot of times as parents -- we are saying the right things! But we are saying them at the wrong time. It's not about what you're doing. It's about WHEN you're doing it.

In the "green arrow" moments, we teach. In the "yellow arrow" moment, we prompt. And in the red, sometimes we prompt, mostly we STAY SAFE.

⋒ SHOW NOTES: xolaurenpace.com/xoparenting

⋒ FACEBOOK GROUP: facebook.com/groups/xoparenting

Sign up for 2-week or 4-week parent coaching for 10% off with code XOPARENTINGPODCAST, xolaurenpace.com/coaching

_____________________________________

If you're new to me, I'm Lauren Pace. Mom of two (one on the way). I have a Master's Degree in Child Development with research in challenging behavior. I have worked as a behavior coach online, in classrooms, and in homes.

Talking about child development & challenging behavior fires me up with so much passion and my goal is to help parents all over the world.

I love helping parents understand their children, see hard behavior through new lenses & strengthen their relationships.

_____________________________________