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What do NHL hockey fights, GTA 6, Thanksgiving turkey, a giant Battlehawks mascot, and a failed concert ticket giveaway have in common? Absolutely nothing. Which makes them perfect material for The Rizzuto Show.
Former St. Louis Blues enforcer Cam "Jacuzzi" Janssen joins Rizz, Moon Valjean, Rafe Williams, and King Scott for a marathon of St. Louis morning show chaos featuring hockey war stories, ridiculous celebrity news, questionable holiday traditions, NFL Pick'em punishments, video game addiction, and a listener contest that manages to accomplish the impossible.
Four contestants. Plenty of concert tickets. Zero winners.
And that's not even the biggest disaster of the day.
First, Cam Janssen reveals what really went down during his NHL fighting days.
Cam takes the crew back to his early hockey career, when he started playing competitively at age 11 in Eureka, Missouri, and worked his way into an NHL preseason game by 18.
Seven years.
That's how long it took Cam to go from learning the sport to sharing the ice with professional hockey players.
Meanwhile, the rest of us are still trying to figure out which direction to push the shopping cart when one wheel stops working.
Cam remembers traveling across the country for youth hockey tournaments, getting thrown out of games for big hits, and making his mother drive all the way home after he'd barely played.
He also talks about moving to Windsor, Ontario, as a teenager, living with a strict billet family, and learning to survive against older players who were bigger, tougher, and already missing several important teeth.
Then the conversation gets into the actual secrets of hockey fighting.
Cam explains how enforcers stretched out the necks of their jerseys to make it harder for opponents to grab them. Other players allegedly used sticky substances to gain an advantage during fights.
Apparently, NHL enforcers were preparing for fights with the same level of creativity the Rizz Show uses to avoid doing actual work.
The guys also discuss the serious side of professional hockey, including head injuries, the physical toll of the sport, and Cam's difficult personal experiences with prescription pain medication.
Cam talks openly about the dangers of mixing medications and the painful side effects he experienced during his career.
Naturally, the conversation somehow ends with Rafe telling a story about his own post-surgery bathroom nightmare.
Because even when the show starts with an important conversation about athlete health, somebody eventually has to bring up constipation.
That's the kind of professionalism you can expect from this funny podcast.
Next, the St. Louis Blues have apparently committed a fashion crime.
The NHL's new Hometown Remix jerseys are here, and Blues fans are not exactly greeting them with a standing ovation.
The new St. Louis design features black and silver, local-inspired details, and a look that has divided hockey fans across the city.
Some people love it.
Some people hate it.
Moon thinks the iconic Blue Note deserves a much bigger role.
Rizz wonders why everyone is losing their minds over a jersey the team will only wear for a limited number of games.
Cam discusses his own reaction to the uniforms, plus the signed hockey jerseys and memorabilia he's given away over the years.
Which leads to a surprisingly relatable confession: sometimes you give someone a fantastic gift and immediately realize you should've kept it.
The crew compares alternate jerseys from around the NHL, including Florida's Miami-inspired look, Chicago's green design, and several other questionable fashion decisions.
Rafe suggests the Blues should've embraced St. Louis culture by putting a giant pothole on the jersey.
Finally, a design that truly represents the city.
Meanwhile, King Scott reaches the grand finale of Mascot Punishment Week.
After suffering through a parade of costumes that included a pig, a giant toasted ravioli, lettuce, avocado, pizza, and an overheated chicken, Scott gets one last assignment.
He's dressing as Archie B. Hawk, the official mascot of the St. Louis Battlehawks.
And this costume comes with rules.
Lots of rules.
The Battlehawks have specific guidelines about protecting the mascot's image, keeping things family-friendly, and avoiding inappropriate jokes or behavior while wearing the suit.
Which is adorable, because apparently nobody told them which radio show was borrowing it.
Scott struggles through the complicated costume, the giant bird head, and the unique challenge of trying to communicate with people while dressed like a professional sports mascot.
The guys admire the outfit, joke about its smell, and celebrate the end of a punishment week that turned King Scott into nearly every category of food on the planet.
But Scott's freedom means somebody else has to suffer.
And this time, it's Rafe.
Rafe Williams spins the Wheel of Punishments and lands on the Blind Taste Test.
After losing the latest NFL Pick'em challenge, Rafe is forced to accept a punishment that gives his coworkers way too much power.
The crew will bring in mystery food items, blindfold Rafe, and make him identify what he's tasting.
Rafe immediately starts negotiating.
Nothing illegal.
Nothing disgusting.
No bugs.
And definitely nothing that causes him to instinctively punch somebody.
Rizz assures him the food will be edible.
Which is technically reassuring, but not nearly as reassuring as Rafe would like.
The crew schedules the challenge for November 10, giving everyone time to find the perfect combination of legal, edible, and emotionally damaging food.
Rafe hasn't even taken the first bite, and he's already questioning his life choices.
Then the gang tackles the most important question in American holiday history: Is Thanksgiving turkey a scam?
Christmas music is already invading stores, Thanksgiving is fighting for attention, and Rizz is wondering why everybody insists on cooking an enormous bird that usually needs a gallon of gravy to become interesting.
The crew debates whether turkey deserves its place at the center of Thanksgiving dinner.
Rizz makes a case for an all-sides Thanksgiving.
Rafe suggests brisket.
Cam defends properly cooked turkey.
Moon is perfectly happy letting somebody else handle the cooking.
Ham and chicken get nominated as replacements.
And the real stars of the holiday—mashed potatoes, stuffing, rolls, and gravy—finally receive the respect they deserve.
The guys also debate Christmas decorations going up too early, holiday music taking over retail stores, and which holidays America could eliminate without anybody noticing.
Valentine's Day is in trouble.
St. Patrick's Day takes a few shots.
And somehow Easter candy becomes a legitimate point of contention.
If you thought holiday traditions were safe from the Rizz Show, you must be new here.
Speaking of food, it's National Sandwich Day, and St. Louis gets some love.
The gang celebrates local sandwich favorites, including Blues City Deli, Gioia's Deli, LeGrand's, The Gramophone, Union Loafers, and other places that make living in St. Louis worth the occasional pothole-related suspension damage.
The conversation includes veteran-owned Semper Fi Sammy's, a listener from Peppers Deli and BBQ, and plenty of opinions about where to find a great sandwich.
Rizz complains about sandwich options in West County.
Moon talks about recommending local favorites to visitors.
Rafe discovers that a military-themed sandwich menu provides almost unlimited opportunities for jokes.
And everybody gets hungry.
It's one of the few times the crew manages to promote local businesses while simultaneously making lunch feel like an emergency.
Then Boston decides to stage a revolution against Liberty Mutual commercials.
The crew reacts to reports of a protest outside Liberty Mutual's headquarters, where people gathered to complain about the company's relentless advertising campaigns.
Yes.
An actual protest.
About insurance commercials.
The guys discuss Liberty Biberty, LiMu Emu, Doug, and whether the commercials are genuinely annoying or simply so effective that people can't stop talking about them.
A counterprotester reportedly showed up dressed as one of the company's advertising characters.
Because apparently even insurance commercials have passionate defenders now.
The crew wonders whether this is a brilliant marketing opportunity, an elaborate joke, or proof that America has officially run out of real things to argue about.
Either way, Boston has found its latest revolution.
No taxation without commercial representation.
Or something like that.
And just when things couldn't get more ridiculous, GTA 6 enters the conversation.
The guys discuss a survey asking gamers what they'd sacrifice to play Grand Theft Auto 6 early.
According to the numbers discussed on the show, some respondents claimed they'd give up sex for a month to get early access.
Others were apparently willing to make even more questionable sacrifices.
Including their pets.
Their actual pets.
For a video game.
Rafe has some very strong opinions about anyone willing to trade a living animal for an early copy of Grand Theft Auto.
King Scott, meanwhile, is already considering the premium edition, a better television, and the amount of time he'll need to disappear into the game.
Moon questions how Scott plans to balance all that gaming with being a father.
Scott seems confident.
We'll see how that goes.
The guys also debate whether GTA 6 could hurt workplace productivity, whether people will skip school or work to play, and what might happen if Cam Janssen and King Scott teamed up online.
The fictional police department would like to request additional staffing.
Next, Rizz puts the crew's music knowledge to the test.
A viral Corey Hart video sparks a discussion about classic songs, memorable lyrics, and the surprising number of hits people have apparently misunderstood for decades.
Rafe admits he thought "Sunglasses at Night" was a Sting song.
Which is the kind of mistake that should probably result in another spin of the punishment wheel.
The crew works through music references involving TLC, Sir Mix-a-Lot, the Backstreet Boys, Meat Loaf, Tom Petty, Pearl Jam, the Smashing Pumpkins, and more.
Moon looks suspiciously prepared.
Cam holds his own.
And Rafe discovers that music trivia is a dangerous game when everyone in the room is actively looking for reasons to make fun of you.
Then it's time for celebrity gossip, Hollywood what-ifs, and entertainment news.
Moon brings stories involving Britney Spears, Arnold Schwarzenegger playing Santa Claus, relationship rumors surrounding well-known celebrities, and Hollywood casting decisions that almost changed movie history.
The guys imagine alternate versions of iconic films, including Rocky, Grease, The Silence of the Lambs, and American Psycho.
They also discuss a new television special about the unsolved JonBenét Ramsey case and false online rumors surrounding a tragic Florida plane crash.
It's a mix of pop culture commentary, celebrity news, serious headlines, and the usual sarcastic humor that makes the crew impossible to leave unsupervised.
Finally, the gang attempts to give away concert tickets with Just the Two of Us.
This should be simple.
Cam Janssen pairs up with different members of the Rizz Show crew.
Rafe asks five questions.
If the two players match three answers, a listener wins tickets.
The prize choices include 311, Three Days Grace, Wage War, and Alter Bridge.
There's even a special Patient Zero contestant who can win if a team matches either none of the answers or all five.
What could go wrong?
Everything.
Cam teams up with Rizz for questions about frozen pizza, breakfast cereal, hot dog toppings, movie robots, and nuts with cool names.
They manage to match on Red Baron pizza, thanks to a previous conversation about the viral Red Baron employee story.
Unfortunately, that brief moment of intellectual harmony does not last.
Cam and Rafe attempt questions about casino games, bald celebrities, milkshake flavors, chain restaurant appetizers, and collectibles.
Strawberry milkshakes provide a moment of hope.
But not enough hope.
Cam and Moon face questions about celebrities wearing sunglasses, talking animals in movies, gas station purchases, famous detectives, and fried food.
They somehow find themselves arguing about Homeward Bound, Shrek, Sherlock Holmes, and what people buy at gas stations.
And finally, King Scott joins Cam while still dressed as Archie B. Hawk.
The giant mascot head makes communication difficult enough.
But then Scott tries to name the popular hospital drama The Pitt.
And calls it The Hill.
A television show that does not exist in this particular contest.
At that point, even Cam Janssen can't save the situation.
The teams keep missing the required number of matches.
And whenever they look like they might completely fail, they accidentally get just enough right to ruin the Patient Zero contestant's chances.
By the end of the game, four callers have tried.
The crew has embarrassed itself repeatedly.
And not one listener has won a prize.
That's right.
An entire concert ticket giveaway where the biggest winner is the station's remaining ticket inventory.
Beautiful work, everybody.
From Cam Janssen's NHL fighting stories and the St. Louis Blues jersey controversy to King Scott's Battlehawks mascot finale, Rafe's blind taste test punishment, GTA 6 obsession, Thanksgiving turkey debates, Liberty Biberty protests, celebrity gossip, and the spectacular failure of Just the Two of Us, this combined episode delivers a little bit of everything.
It's St. Louis entertainment, funny stories, weird news, sports talk, pop culture commentary, daily humor, and the kind of morning show chaos that makes this funny podcast a terrible place to look for responsible adult behavior.
So hit play, defend your favorite Thanksgiving side dish, reconsider giving away your pets for a video game, and remember that if you ever play a guessing game with King Scott, make sure he knows the difference between a hill and a pit.
And congratulations to Cam Janssen for surviving an entire morning with the Rizz Show.
He spent years fighting NHL enforcers.
This might've been harder.
Welcome to another spectacularly unnecessary adventure on your favorite funny podcast, The Rizzuto Show.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Four contestants, one former NHL enforcer, a giant Battlehawks mascot, and a pile of concert tickets. What could possibly go wrong? Apparently, every single thing. Welcome to The Rizzuto Show, where the prizes are real, the answers are questionable, and winning is apparently optional.
Rizz, Moon Valjean, Rafe Williams, King Scott, and special guest Cam "Jacuzzi" Janssen are back for another round of St. Louis morning show chaos, featuring NFL Pick'em punishments, a music trivia-inspired guessing game, and one of the most gloriously unsuccessful giveaways in Rizz Show history.
And somehow, King Scott being dressed as a giant bird is only the second-strangest thing happening in the studio.
First up: Rafe Williams spins the Wheel of Punishments.
After losing the latest NFL Pick'em challenge, Rafe is forced to face the same terrifying wheel that has already turned King Scott's life into a rotating collection of mascot-related humiliations.
Scott is wrapping up his own punishment week inside the Archie B. Hawk costume from the St. Louis Battlehawks, which makes him the perfect assistant for Rafe's moment of reckoning.
The wheel spins.
The crew waits.
Rafe desperately hopes for something painless.
And then it lands on the Blind Taste Test.
Congratulations, Rafe. Your coworkers are now legally allowed—at least according to the extremely questionable rules of this radio show—to put mystery food in your mouth.
Rizz explains that the rest of the crew will each bring in an edible item, blindfold Rafe, and make him identify what he's eating.
Rafe immediately begins negotiating.
No bugs. Nothing illegal. Nothing that triggers his fight-or-flight response. And definitely no surprise onions.
Because apparently an onion is where the professional comedian draws the line.
The guys schedule the punishment for Tuesday, November 10, giving everyone plenty of time to shop for something deeply unpleasant.
Rafe is already regretting every decision that brought him here.
And the taste test hasn't even happened yet.
Then it's time for Just the Two of Us, the Rizz Show game where matching three answers out of five can win listeners concert tickets.
Today's special twist?
Former St. Louis Blues enforcer Cam Janssen has to team up with different members of the crew while Rafe asks the questions.
The prizes include tickets to 311, Three Days Grace, Wage War, and Alter Bridge.
Sounds easy enough.
All Cam has to do is think like Rizz, Rafe, Moon, or King Scott.
Which, honestly, might be more difficult than fighting a professional hockey player.
Round one: Cam Janssen and Rizz try to send Mark from Warrenton to see 311.
Rafe opens with a question about nuts that have cool names.
Naturally, somebody goes straight for the most predictable joke imaginable.
The guys eventually find common ground on Red Baron frozen pizza, thanks to a previous discussion about the viral Red Baron employee story.
For one glorious moment, it looks like they might actually understand each other.
Then the wheels fall off.
They can't agree on what belongs exclusively on a hot dog. Their famous movie robots don't match. And breakfast cereal becomes an unexpectedly complicated subject.
Mark doesn't get his tickets.
The crew learns absolutely nothing.
Round two: Cam and Rafe attempt to redeem themselves.
Listener Chris wants tickets to 311, and Rafe is convinced he and Cam are about to dominate.
The questions cover casino games, bald celebrities, milkshake flavors, chain restaurants known for appetizers, and things people collect.
Easy, right?
Not when two people can both give perfectly reasonable answers and still be completely wrong together.
They stumble over casino games.
They miss the bald celebrity question.
They finally connect on strawberry milkshakes, giving the studio a brief moment of hope.
But then appetizers become a battle between Chili's and Applebee's.
Somehow, a question about collectible items leads to one of the most unexpectedly successful moments of the round.
Too little, too late.
Chris isn't going to 311 either.
And the crew's funny podcast has officially become a master class in how to disappoint people with confidence.
Round three: Moon and Cam take their shot.
Listener Amy enters the contest hoping to win concert tickets, and Moon is ready to prove that he's the one person in the studio who can think like a normal human being.
Unfortunately, that would require Cam to do the same thing.
The questions include celebrities famous for sunglasses, movies featuring talking animals, gas station purchases, fictional detectives, and foods that taste better fried.
The sunglasses question produces a particularly ridiculous collection of answers, including Joe Biden, Jack Nicholson, and a callback to Corey Hart.
Then the guys debate Homeward Bound versus Shrek.
Gas station shopping becomes an argument about beer, coffee, candy bars, and lottery tickets.
And when the conversation finally reaches Sherlock Holmes, things briefly seem promising.
But once again, the answers don't line up.
By this point, the crew is also watching Abby, the designated Patient Zero contestant, who can win if a round produces either zero matches or a perfect five-for-five.
The problem?
The guys keep matching just enough answers to ruin everybody's chances.
It's almost impressive.
They're not good enough to win, but they're just good enough to prevent someone else from winning.
That's a very specific talent.
Finally, King Scott joins Cam for the last attempt.
And remember, Scott is still wearing a giant Battlehawks mascot head.
So not only does Cam have to predict Scott's answers, he also has to understand what Scott is saying through a giant bird beak.
Listener Nicholas hopes this will finally be the winning combination.
Rafe asks about popular hospital dramas, celebrities with famous mustaches, restaurants serving complimentary bread, things people take from hotel rooms, and celebrities who've been married multiple times.
The first question immediately becomes legendary.
Cam thinks of a recognizable hospital drama.
Scott attempts to name the award-winning series The Pitt.
Except he calls it The Hill.
Close enough geographically.
Not quite close enough for television trivia.
The guys also manage to land on two different iconic mustaches, proving that Tom Selleck and Sam Elliott have been confusing the American public for decades.
Olive Garden breadsticks enter the conversation.
Hotel shampoo and shoehorns become a subject of debate.
And King Scott's mascot head continues to make every answer sound like it's being delivered from inside a very large feathered mailbox.
By the end of the game, the scoreboard tells a beautiful, terrible story.
Nobody wins.
Not Mark.
Not Chris.
Not Amy.
Not Nicholas.
And not even Patient Zero.
Four rounds of questions, a former NHL enforcer, an entire studio of alleged adults, and a collection of concert tickets that remain stubbornly unclaimed.
It's the kind of spectacular failure that could only happen on The Rizzuto Show.
The episode also includes talk about upcoming comedians visiting St. Louis for the Flyover Comedy Festival, including Yakov Smirnoff and the Sklar Brothers, plus discussion of Impractical Jokers star James "Murr" Murray and his upcoming appearance at Helium Comedy Club.
Because apparently the only thing the crew enjoys more than humiliating themselves is inviting professional comedians to witness it.
From Rafe's upcoming blind taste test punishment and King Scott's Battlehawks mascot finale to Cam Janssen's disastrous guessing-game partnerships, this episode delivers classic Rizz Show comedy talk, ridiculous answers, listener giveaways, and plenty of St. Louis humor.
It's a funny podcast full of game-show disasters, sports punishment chaos, music references, frozen pizza callbacks, and the kind of sarcastic humor that makes you wonder why anybody keeps trusting these people with prizes.
Hit play, test your own answers against the crew, and see whether you could've done better.
Spoiler: You probably could.
And if you ever get paired with King Scott for a trivia contest, make sure he's not wearing a giant bird head.
Because when a man answers The Hill instead of The Pitt, you know you're in for a long morning.
Another unforgettable disaster on your favorite funny podcast, The Rizzuto Show.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
What happens when a former NHL enforcer explains the dirty secrets of hockey fighting, Boston residents revolt against an insurance mascot, and video game fans admit they'd sacrifice almost anything for GTA 6? Apparently, another perfectly normal morning on The Rizzuto Show.
Former St. Louis Blues enforcer Cam "Jacuzzi" Janssen joins Rizz, Moon Valjean, Rafe Williams, and King Scott for a morning packed with hockey war stories, ridiculous protests, gaming obsession, celebrity gossip, and the kind of conversations that should probably come with a warning label.
And this time, the guy who used to punch professional hockey players for a living might actually be the most reasonable person in the room.
Cam Janssen reveals what really happened behind the scenes of NHL hockey fights.
Cam explains how he went from starting competitive hockey at age 11 in Eureka, Missouri, to playing in an NHL preseason game just seven years later. That's an impressive career trajectory for a kid whose early tournament strategy apparently involved driving 12 hours, checking somebody into the boards, getting ejected, and making his mother drive straight back home.
Nothing says family bonding like a three-day hockey tournament that lasts one shift.
The former Blues tough guy also talks about moving to Windsor, Ontario, as a teenager, living with a strict billet family, going to school in a new country, and fighting older players who already had beards, missing teeth, and absolutely no interest in being nice to the new kid.
Then things get even more interesting.
Cam explains how NHL enforcers tried to gain an advantage before a fight, including stretching the necks of their jerseys so opponents couldn't get a good grip. He remembers other players using sticky substances to make fights even more miserable.
Apparently, professional hockey fighting involves more preparation than most people put into their taxes.
The conversation also gets serious as Cam discusses head injuries, the physical demands of professional hockey, and the dangerous culture surrounding painkillers and recovery during his playing days.
He shares his own difficult experiences with pain medication, which somehow leads to an extremely detailed conversation about constipation.
Because this is a funny podcast, and no meaningful discussion of professional sports medicine is complete until Rafe starts talking about his bathroom problems after gallbladder surgery.
Next, Rizz discovers that the crew might need to repeat music history class.
A viral video asking younger employees when Corey Hart wore his sunglasses inspires Rizz to quiz the entire room on classic song lyrics.
The problem?
Rafe apparently spent most of his life believing Corey Hart's "Sunglasses at Night" was performed by Sting.
That's not a small mistake. That's an entire musical identity crisis.
The guys face questions about Sir Mix-a-Lot, TLC, the Backstreet Boys, Meat Loaf, Montell Jordan, Young MC, the B-52s, Tom Petty, the Eagles, House of Pain, Chumbawamba, System of a Down, the Verve, Pearl Jam, and the Smashing Pumpkins.
Moon starts looking suspiciously competent. Cam proves he knows his music. King Scott struggles with some lyrics. And Rafe discovers that several songs he thought he understood have been living completely different lives in his head.
It's part music trivia, part generational humiliation, and part reminder that nobody should ever let Rizz administer a standardized test.
Then Boston decides it's time for another revolution. Against Liberty Biberty.
Yes, the insurance commercial guy.
The crew reacts to a reported protest outside Liberty Mutual's headquarters, where demonstrators demanded an end to the seemingly endless advertising campaigns.
The event's young organizer compared the protest to the Boston Tea Party.
Which is a pretty dramatic escalation for people who are tired of hearing about car insurance.
One counterprotester reportedly arrived dressed as the mascot to defend the commercials.
Naturally, the Rizz Show has questions.
Is the campaign genuinely that annoying? Is Liberty Mutual secretly getting free publicity from the whole thing? Does anyone even know which Liberty character they're supposed to hate?
Between LiMu Emu, Doug, Liberty Biberty, and the endless parade of commercials during sporting events, the crew starts wondering whether the company has too many mascots or simply understands marketing better than the rest of us.
Either way, Boston has apparently found a new hill to die on.
And it's sponsored by insurance.
Meanwhile, Grand Theft Auto 6 threatens to destroy workplace productivity, relationships, and possibly pet ownership.
The gang dives into a survey about how far gamers would go to play GTA 6 early.
According to the figures discussed on the show, 21% of surveyed gamers said they'd give up sex for a month to get the game one week early. Among people planning to preorder, that number jumped to 32%.
But the most alarming statistic?
Seven percent reportedly said they'd give up their pets for early access.
Their actual pets.
For a video game.
Rafe points out that maybe those people shouldn't have pets in the first place.
King Scott, meanwhile, is already thinking about the premium version of the game, upgrading his television, and disappearing into a digital world where nobody can ask him to do chores.
The guys debate whether GTA 6 could trigger a massive drop in workplace productivity, whether students will skip school to play, and how gaming can completely swallow an entire day.
Moon also questions whether Scott's new responsibilities as a father are going to interfere with his ambitious gaming plans.
Scott seems confident he can make it work.
His wife may have a slightly different opinion.
The crew even imagines what would happen if Cam Janssen and King Scott teamed up for an online Grand Theft Auto adventure.
Honestly, the virtual police department deserves advance notice.
And because the entertainment industry refuses to take a day off, it's time for Crap on Celebrities.
Moon brings a stack of celebrity and pop culture stories, including reported relationship trouble involving Margaret Qualley and Jack Antonoff, plus breakup rumors surrounding Bill Belichick and Jordon Hudson.
The crew also reacts to Arnold Schwarzenegger playing Santa Claus in a Christmas movie and debates Hollywood's growing collection of action-hero Santas.
Because apparently if you've ever starred in an action movie, you're legally required to put on a red suit and save Christmas at least once.
The conversation turns more serious with discussion of a tragic Florida plane crash and false online rumors that Lenny Kravitz had been aboard. The crew talks about the dangers of internet speculation, aviation safety, and how quickly unverified stories spread.
They also discuss a new television special revisiting the unsolved JonBenét Ramsey case, Britney Spears' latest public family disputes, and the strange world of celebrity headlines that somehow gets more complicated every week.
Then Moon tests the guys on famous movie roles that nearly went to completely different actors.
Imagine Rocky without Sylvester Stallone.
Grease without John Travolta.
The Silence of the Lambs without Jodie Foster.
Or American Psycho with Leonardo DiCaprio instead of Christian Bale.
The crew explores Hollywood's alternate casting history, including actors who passed on roles that eventually became iconic.
It's the kind of pop culture commentary that makes you realize some of your favorite movies were only one bad casting decision away from becoming completely different films.
And just when you think the morning has finally settled down, the gang prepares to play Just the Two of Us, with Cam Janssen joining the listener game for a chance to win concert tickets.
Because nothing says professional radio production like asking a former NHL fighter to match answers with somebody who may or may not know who sang "Sunglasses at Night."
From St. Louis Blues hockey stories and behind-the-scenes NHL fights to Liberty Biberty protests, GTA 6 gaming obsession, classic rock trivia, Hollywood gossip, and bizarre news, this episode has everything you want from a funny podcast.
It's daily comedy, sarcastic humor, St. Louis entertainment, and a collection of grown adults discovering new ways to embarrass themselves before breakfast.
So hit play, leave your pets out of your video game negotiations, and remember that if you're going to challenge Cam Janssen to a fight, you should probably check whether he's already stretched out his jersey.
And if somebody in Boston starts another revolution against an insurance commercial?
Maybe just change the channel.
Welcome to another completely unnecessary adventure on your favorite funny podcast, The Rizzuto Show.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
King Scott finally reaches the end of his mascot punishment, St. Louis Blues fans are furious about a hockey jersey, and the Rizz Show crew is seriously considering firing turkey from Thanksgiving dinner. Somehow, that's only the beginning of today's nonsense.
It's another Tuesday on The Rizzuto Show, and Rizz, Moon Valjean, Rafe Williams, King Scott, and special guest Cam "Jacuzzi" Janssen are back for a St. Louis morning show that proves grown men can argue about absolutely anything.
Especially hockey uniforms, holiday food, and which coworker deserves to suffer next.
First up: King Scott's mascot punishment finally comes to an end.
After spending days dressed as everything from a questionable pig and giant toasted ravioli to lettuce, avocado, pizza, and an overheated chicken, Scott gets to finish his NFL Pick'em punishment in style.
Well, sort of.
For the grand finale, he's wearing Archie B. Hawk, the official mascot of the St. Louis Battlehawks.
And unlike the other costumes, this one comes with an actual rulebook.
The Battlehawks have some very reasonable requests: protect the mascot's image, don't make inappropriate jokes while wearing the suit, and don't do anything that would embarrass the organization.
Unfortunately, they have entrusted this responsibility to King Scott and the Rizz Show.
Excellent decision, everybody.
The costume takes serious effort to put on, comes with a giant bird head, and apparently smells like an old hockey bag. But Scott finally gets to trade his previous roles as various edible animals and vegetables for something with wings.
Meanwhile, Rafe's NFL Pick'em loss means it's his turn to face the dreaded Wheel of Punishments. And with a face-tattoo-themed punishment being discussed, Rafe is suddenly very interested in how many ways a wheel can be rigged.
That's the kind of supportive workplace environment you get on this funny podcast.
Then Cam Janssen joins the crew for a full-blown St. Louis Blues jersey controversy.
The NHL has unveiled its new Hometown Remix uniforms, and Blues fans have opinions.
Lots of them.
The new St. Louis Blues jersey features black and silver, a redesigned look, and details inspired by the city. Some fans love it. Others think it looks like a youth hockey jersey.
Moon wants the iconic Blue Note front and center. Rizz doesn't understand why everybody is so upset about a uniform the team will only wear for a limited number of games. Cam likes parts of the design, but the conversation quickly turns into a tour of questionable NHL fashion decisions.
The crew compares jerseys from across the league, including the Florida Panthers' Miami Vice-style colors, Chicago's green look, and designs from Calgary, Colorado, Columbus, Detroit, and New Jersey.
Rafe suggests the Blues should've leaned harder into St. Louis identity with a pothole-themed jersey.
Honestly, that's a pretty recognizable local landmark.
Cam also tells the crew about giving away signed hockey jerseys and memorabilia over the years, only to realize later that he might've been a little too generous.
Turns out being a nice guy is great until you remember you gave somebody a really cool jersey that you now desperately want back.
Next, the crew declares war on the holiday calendar.
Christmas music is already blasting through stores, Rafe is just trying to buy hair conditioner, and Rizz is furious that fall apparently lasts about 11 minutes before Mariah Carey takes over the speakers.
The guys debate when Christmas decorations should go up, how many Christmas trees are too many, and which holiday they'd eliminate if they had the power.
Valentine's Day is an early target.
St. Patrick's Day catches some heat.
Rafe even considers benching Easter, which immediately creates a secondary argument about Cadbury Creme Eggs.
Because apparently the real meaning of the holidays is yelling at your friends about candy.
And then comes the question that could destroy Thanksgiving as we know it.
Is Thanksgiving turkey a scam?
Think about it.
You spend hours cooking an enormous bird. You worry about drying it out. You spend half the meal explaining why it isn't dry. Then everybody buries it under gravy, mashed potatoes, and stuffing.
At what point do we admit the side dishes are doing all the work?
Rizz floats the idea of an all-sides Thanksgiving dinner. Cam defends a properly cooked turkey but admits it's easy to mess up. Moon prefers letting the professionals handle the bird. Rafe is more than willing to replace the entire centerpiece with brisket.
Ham gets nominated.
Chicken makes a strong case.
Turkey is suddenly fighting for its life on the one day of the year it's supposed to be the star.
The crew also debates deep-frying a turkey, the risks of cooking one improperly, and whether anyone would actually miss the bird if the mashed potatoes, stuffing, rolls, and gravy were still there.
If you've ever watched somebody spend 12 hours preparing Thanksgiving dinner only to apologize for the meat being dry, this conversation is for you.
And because one food argument isn't enough, it's National Sandwich Day.
The gang celebrates St. Louis sandwich culture with a rundown of local favorites, including Blues City Deli, Gioia's Deli, LeGrand's, The Gramophone, Union Loafers, Vivola Express, and more.
Moon talks about sending out-of-town visitors to local favorites. Rizz complains about the sandwich options in West County. And the guys discover Semper Fi Sammy's, a veteran-owned sandwich shop with military-inspired menu names that give Rafe approximately 400 opportunities to make jokes.
A listener also calls in from Peppers Deli and BBQ, sharing the story behind the family's longtime sandwich business and its house-smoked meats.
It's a rare moment when the Rizz Show manages to discuss local businesses, support St. Louis restaurants, and make everybody in the studio hungry at the same time.
Naturally, the conversation still finds a way to go completely off the rails.
The episode also includes discussions about holiday shopping, bookstores, physical media making a comeback, and the kind of bizarre news stories that make you question how anybody gets through life without accidentally becoming a headline.
Including a discussion of a man who set out on an extraordinary journey around the world on foot, navigating borders, travel restrictions, and even a major sea crossing.
Rafe, of course, immediately imagines the entire adventure starting because somebody got into an argument at home and decided to take the world's longest spite walk.
From King Scott's Battlehawks mascot finale and the St. Louis Blues jersey backlash to the Thanksgiving turkey debate, Christmas music complaints, and St. Louis sandwich rankings, this episode delivers everything you expect from a funny podcast: daily humor, weird news, sports arguments, food debates, and a room full of people who refuse to let a perfectly normal conversation stay normal.
It's classic Rizz Show comedy talk from 105.7 The Point in St. Louis, with Rizz, Moon, Rafe, King Scott, and Cam Janssen turning a Tuesday morning into an extended argument about birds.
Some are mascots.
Some are dinner.
None are safe.
So hit play, grab your favorite sandwich, defend your Thanksgiving side dishes, and remember: if you're going to complain about the Blues' new jersey, at least wait until they win a few games wearing it.
And congratulations to King Scott on surviving mascot week.
We're sure his dignity will recover eventually.
Probably.
That's another day of chaos on your favorite funny podcast, The Rizzuto Show.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
King Scott is trapped inside a giant chicken, Mariah Carey has a secret rock-star past, Michael Jordan might have a new head of hair, and Martha Stewart has managed to make Halloween costumes controversial. Just another Monday on The Rizzuto Show, where apparently nobody can be trusted with a costume, a microphone, or a holiday.
Halloween is officially over, November has arrived, and the Rizz Show crew is still recovering from a weekend of candy, costumes, crowded parties, and grown adults taking Halloween way too seriously.
Rizz, Moon Valjean, Rafe Williams, and King Scott are back with another round of St. Louis morning-show chaos. And if you thought things would calm down after Halloween, we'd like to remind you that King Scott is currently dressed as a chicken.
King Scott's NFL Pick'em punishment continues, and today's costume comes courtesy of Lee's Famous Recipe Chicken.
The giant chicken suit has everything you could want in a mascot outfit: an enormous head, ridiculous gloves, a surprisingly complicated assembly process, and absolutely no consideration for the poor guy who has to sit inside it for hours.
Scott quickly discovers that being a professional mascot is no joke. The costume is hot, the head is heavy, his neck is suffering, and editing a podcast while wearing oversized chicken gloves turns out to be a terrible idea.
Who could've predicted that?
The crew also previews the final day of mascot punishment, when Scott is scheduled to climb into a St. Louis Battlehawks costume that reportedly takes around 15 minutes just to put on.
After the stinky pig, giant toasted ravioli, salad ingredients, and now an overheated chicken, Scott has officially become the most aggressively sponsored man in St. Louis.
Meanwhile, the latest NFL Pick'em challenge comes down to Rafe and Moon, with their punishment hopes riding on opposite sides of Monday Night Football. Rizz is thrilled about one thing: he's safe.
That's the kind of teamwork you can expect from this funny podcast. Everybody for themselves, especially when there's a mascot head involved.
Then comes the great Halloween argument: Is trunk-or-treat ruining trick-or-treating?
Rizz is still taking heat from listeners over his belief that parking-lot candy events are slowly stealing the magic from traditional Halloween.
He remembers the glory days of grabbing a pillowcase, meeting up with friends, and spending hours walking through neighborhoods in search of the houses giving away the good stuff.
Moon sees things differently. Why can't trunk-or-treat just be another Halloween activity? Younger kids get to wear their costumes, families get more candy, and parents get an organized event.
Sounds harmless.
Except Moon also reports a surprisingly light trick-or-treat turnout at his house, despite having full-size candy bars, Reese's, elaborate decorations, movies projected onto the garage, and enough chili to feed a small neighborhood.
Rizz sees evidence of a Halloween crisis.
Moon sees a fun family tradition that's changing with the times.
Rafe sees an opportunity to make fun of everybody.
Naturally, nobody solves anything.
The conversation also takes a nostalgic detour into the absolutely terrible store-bought Halloween costumes of the 1980s: flimsy plastic masks, rubber bands that broke immediately, and outfits that were essentially garbage bags with a character printed on them.
Rizz remembers his Yoda mask being a legitimate mouth injury waiting to happen.
Modern kids might have expensive costumes, but at least their parents aren't sending them outside wearing sharp plastic held together by one staple.
And then there's the Ballpark Village Halloween party.
Rizz, Rafe, and King Scott recap a packed night in downtown St. Louis, where the crowd went all out with costumes and the Rizz Show showed up dressed as characters from The Lost Boys.
Rizz took on Kiefer Sutherland's David, Scott joined the vampire-hunting crew, and Rafe committed to the legendary saxophone player look.
Rafe's costume was so convincing that some people apparently thought he was part of the entertainment.
The saxophone didn't even work.
Perfect.
The costume contest featured some genuinely impressive creations, including a towering Alien Xenomorph, a Ghostbusters Terror Dog, and other elaborate outfits that clearly required more preparation than the rest of us put into filing our taxes.
Unfortunately, the night also included a very unhappy attendee who didn't appreciate the contest selections.
Rizz explains that Ballpark Village staff selected the finalists, while the Rizz Show simply hosted the event. According to Rizz, the situation became especially unpleasant when the upset attendee shoved his wife while she was taking pictures near the stage.
The crew has a simple message: It's a Halloween costume contest. Nobody needs to turn it into an international incident.
They also share the story of a friend dressed as a referee who started issuing pretend penalties to partygoers—and somehow convinced some people he had the authority to kick them out.
Apparently all you need to control a crowd is a whistle, a red card, and the confidence of somebody who's never been told no.
But Halloween isn't finished causing problems, because the celebrity costume department is somehow even worse.
In Crap on Celebrities, the gang reacts to Heidi Klum's outrageous Halloween costume, a giant severed hand modeled from a scan of her actual hand.
Because apparently a witch hat and some fake blood just aren't enough when you're Heidi Klum.
Then there's Martha Stewart, whose Halloween costume as a person experiencing homelessness sparked backlash online.
The crew discusses the image, her explanation that she intended to raise awareness of homelessness, and the uncomfortable optics of an extremely wealthy celebrity holding a cardboard sign asking for help.
It's a conversation about intention, perception, and the fact that some Halloween ideas probably deserve one more review before hitting Instagram.
The gang also discusses Macaulay Culkin's controversial costume, inspired by a historical image of a shell-shocked soldier, and the online reaction to his makeup.
Turns out celebrity Halloween is less about collecting candy and more about collecting angry comments.
Then Mariah Carey arrives to officially end Halloween and start Christmas.
The Queen of Christmas has released her annual holiday announcement, but this year's video comes with a surprise: a nod to the alternative rock music she secretly recorded in the 1990s with the band Chick.
Yes, Mariah Carey made alternative rock music.
The crew listens to a little of that unexpected musical detour before the video switches into full Christmas mode.
Rizz is not ready.
King Scott, naturally, believes November 1 is a perfectly acceptable time to start celebrating Christmas.
The discussion becomes another argument about holiday decorations, Christmas music arriving too early, and whether the phrase "Christmas creep" sounds like a seasonal trend or somebody who shouldn't be allowed near the mall Santa.
Somewhere, a department store has already put up a tree, and Rizz is personally offended.
And just when the entertainment news couldn't get stranger, Michael Jordan apparently has hair.
The crew reacts to photos circulating online that appear to show the basketball legend sporting a much fuller head of hair while spending time in Europe.
Moon thinks the look is great, although he questions whether the images are legitimate.
Rizz can't accept it. Michael Jordan is supposed to be bald. That's simply how the universe works.
Rafe immediately starts imagining Jordan getting a hair transplant just to beat LeBron James at one more thing.
The discussion also revisits Jordan's infamous toothbrush-style mustache from a past Hanes commercial.
Because when you're a billionaire sports legend, apparently your facial hair is still public property.
This is exactly the kind of ridiculous celebrity gossip and pop culture commentary that keeps a funny podcast moving from one bizarre topic to the next.
The crew also looks ahead to November's entertainment calendar, discusses upcoming movies and streaming shows, and celebrates National Deviled Egg Day—an occasion Rafe takes far more seriously than any normal person should.
According to Rafe, he's eaten enough deviled eggs to develop an immunity to their digestive consequences.
Science has not been consulted.
The episode also brings some genuinely good news from the St. Louis community.
The Rizz Show thanks listeners and sponsors who supported its Cardinal Glennon Children's Hospital fundraising efforts, announcing that the campaign had already raised more than $20,000, with the final total still being calculated and a bonus week of sponsorships ahead.
It's a reminder that underneath the mascot abuse, celebrity roasting, and constant arguments about Halloween, the Rizz Show weirdos can actually accomplish something pretty great.
Please don't tell them we said that.
Of course, the weird news doesn't stop there.
The crew discusses a reported private ambulance incident in Cleveland in which a driver allegedly got lost while transporting a patient experiencing chest pains, abandoned the ambulance, and took an Uber home. According to the account discussed on the show, another EMS crew eventually got the patient to the hospital.
There's also the troubled story of a long-term cruise venture that promised life at sea but reportedly left passengers dealing with an abruptly disrupted voyage.
And Rizz shares his excitement over watching the clocks roll backward during the daylight saving time change after a late Halloween night downtown.
For a man approaching 50, an extra hour of sleep might genuinely be the greatest Halloween gift imaginable.
From King Scott's Lee's Chicken costume and the trunk-or-treat debate to Mariah Carey's secret '90s rock band, Michael Jordan's mysterious hair, Martha Stewart's Halloween backlash, and the Ballpark Village costume contest drama, this episode is packed with daily humor, funny stories, entertainment gossip, weird news, and classic Rizz Show sarcasm.
It's the perfect funny podcast for anybody who likes their St. Louis morning entertainment with a side of celebrity chaos, nostalgic arguments, questionable costumes, and coworkers who are way too comfortable making fun of each other.
Hit play, leave the costume judging to the actual judges, don't trust somebody just because they're holding a clipboard, and remember: Halloween may be over, but the embarrassment is apparently year-round.
And somebody please get King Scott out of that chicken suit before Lee's starts charging extra for him being well done.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
King Scott is sweating inside a giant chicken, Rizz is fighting for the future of Halloween, and somebody at a costume contest apparently forgot that dressing up is supposed to be fun. Welcome back to The Rizzuto Show, where the costumes are ridiculous and the adults are somehow worse.
It's Monday morning in St. Louis, and Rizz, Moon Valjean, Rafe Williams, and King Scott are recovering from a Halloween weekend that included elaborate costumes, questionable behavior, an extremely crowded Ballpark Village, and enough leftover candy to keep a dentist employed through Christmas.
But before anybody can talk about their weekend, there's an important piece of unfinished business: King Scott's NFL Pick'em mascot punishment.
Today's assignment? The giant Lee's Famous Recipe Chicken costume.
The crew watches Scott climb into the chicken body, wrestle with the enormous head, figure out where he's supposed to look, and attempt to operate as a functioning radio producer while dressed like the world's most uncomfortable poultry advertisement.
The suit is hot. The head is heavy. The gloves are practically useless for editing audio. And Scott is discovering that mascot work requires a level of physical endurance nobody bothered to mention when he lost his football picks.
Tomorrow brings the grand finale with a St. Louis Battlehawks mascot costume, which apparently takes around 15 minutes just to put on.
At this point, King Scott isn't serving a punishment. He's completing a very strange internship.
It's the kind of workplace nonsense that makes this funny podcast feel less like a professional morning show and more like a group of people who should probably have adult supervision.
Then it's time for the Halloween argument that refuses to die: Is trunk-or-treat ruining trick-or-treating?
Rizz has been catching heat from listeners for suggesting that trunk-or-treat events are stealing some of the magic from traditional Halloween.
Remember when kids grabbed a pillowcase, met up with their friends, and spent hours roaming neighborhoods in search of full-size candy bars? Rizz remembers. He would also like everyone to know that things were better then.
Moon isn't convinced.
He argues that trunk-or-treat can simply be another fun activity, especially for younger kids and families who don't live in neighborhoods with lots of houses. And he has a point: more chances to wear a costume and collect candy aren't exactly a childhood tragedy.
But after Moon reports a lighter-than-expected trick-or-treat turnout at his own house, Rizz sees an opportunity to reopen the case.
Are parking-lot candy events replacing the neighborhood adventure? Are parents just getting their money's worth out of expensive costumes? Or is Rizz becoming the guy who complains about how Halloween used to be better while telling kids to stay off his lawn?
All valid questions. Some more flattering than others.
That debate turns into a trip down memory lane about the truly terrible Halloween costumes of the 1980s.
We're talking plastic masks with sharp mouth openings, rubber bands that snapped after three houses, and character costumes that were essentially garbage bags with a logo on them.
Rizz remembers dressing as Yoda and practically cutting his tongue on the mask. Rafe remembers his mom making his little brother a Glow Worm costume that, in retrospect, looked like something considerably less family-friendly.
Ah, childhood nostalgia. Somehow both magical and made of the cheapest plastic available.
Meanwhile, Halloween night itself was an adventure.
Moon went all out with candy, decorations, movies projected on the garage, and two different kinds of chili. He also narrowly avoided hosting a high-school party that was canceled at the last minute, sparing him from becoming the next neighborhood villain.
King Scott took his little cowgirl trick-or-treating with her cousins, including a stop at an elaborate Beetlejuice-inspired house where kids had to take a number before receiving candy.
And Rizz? He was perfectly content leaving the candy distribution to his in-laws while he headed downtown.
Because the Ballpark Village Halloween party was absolutely packed.
Rizz and Rafe recap a night filled with wild costumes, DJs, huge crowds, and a dance floor that really took off once the giant screens switched from football to Halloween visuals.
The costume contest featured some seriously impressive work, including a towering Alien Xenomorph on stilts that reportedly took six weeks to build, a Ghostbusters Terror Dog, a terrifying Tooth Fairy, and an entire SpongeBob SquarePants crew.
The Rizz Show also showed up in its group costume inspired by The Lost Boys. Rizz went as Kiefer Sutherland's character, King Scott dressed as a Corey Feldman character, Rizz's wife played Star, and Rafe committed to the legendary saxophone player.
Rafe's costume was so convincing that some people thought he was actually part of the night's musical entertainment.
The saxophone didn't even work.
Which, frankly, makes it an even more accurate representation of this show's musical abilities.
Unfortunately, not everyone at the party understood the phrase "costume contest."
The crew discusses an angry attendee who was upset about the contest selections. Rizz makes it clear that the Ballpark Village staff—not The Rizzuto Show—chose the finalists.
According to Rizz, the situation got particularly ugly when the person shoved his wife while she was taking photos near the stage.
Rafe has some thoughts about people who show up in a basic store-bought costume and expect to beat competitors who spent weeks building elaborate creations.
The lesson? It's Halloween. Have fun. Enjoy the costumes. And maybe don't turn a party into a personal grievance hearing.
Speaking of costumes, Rizz discovers that dressing like an authority figure can apparently make people obey you.
His friend Jeremy attended the party dressed as a referee, complete with whistle and red card. He started handing out pretend penalties, and some people actually got up and left because they thought they'd been kicked out.
That launches an entire discussion about outfits that make ordinary people look strangely official.
A construction worker with a clipboard. A backstage technician with a headset. A valet holding a bunch of keys. A pilot with the right shirt and sunglasses.
Apparently the human brain sees a reflective vest and immediately decides that person must know what they're doing.
Rafe even recalls seeing someone dressed as a construction worker wander backstage at the costume party.
No special credentials. Just an outfit and enough confidence to act like he belonged.
The crew also revisits a local story about a Rivian whose keys were reportedly handed over to someone who wasn't supposed to have them, proving that our willingness to trust somebody who looks official can have consequences well beyond a Halloween prank.
Then comes the greatest Halloween miracle of all: Rizz watches daylight saving time happen in real time.
After leaving Ballpark Village around 1:45 a.m., Rizz gets back to his hotel room, looks at his phone, and watches the clock jump backward from 2 a.m. to 1 a.m.
An extra hour of sleep.
A grown man experiencing genuine joy over a clock.
Naturally, this leads to a discussion about proposals to end the twice-yearly time change, whether permanent daylight saving time or standard time makes more sense, and the possibility—raised during the show's discussion—of another clock change if lawmakers were to act.
Moon and Rafe, meanwhile, are still recovering from a weekend of parties, late nights, and the realization that Halloween hits differently once you're in your forties.
The episode also takes a serious turn with a disturbing plane-crash report.
The crew discusses footage and reported air-traffic audio from a private jet crash in Palm Beach County, along with the upsetting circumstances described in the news coverage they were reviewing.
They also react to conspiracy theories circulating online about the crash, while distinguishing those claims from the aircraft information and footage being discussed.
It's a sobering reminder that not every viral video is something to turn into entertainment—and that internet speculation can get out of hand very quickly.
Then the weird-news department gets back to work.
The gang talks about a reportedly troubled long-term cruise venture that left passengers dealing with an abruptly disrupted dream of living at sea. What sounds like an endless vacation becomes considerably less appealing when the money starts running out and the food reportedly gets worse.
And in another story discussed on the show, a private ambulance driver in Cleveland allegedly became so frustrated after getting lost that he abandoned a patient experiencing chest pains in the vehicle and took an Uber home.
Which is an absolutely spectacular way to misunderstand the job description.
Somewhere in the middle of all this, a surprise belated birthday gift for Rafe arrives at the radio station, but the reveal is complicated by one tiny problem: the guy who's supposed to help coordinate it is wearing an enormous chicken head.
You really couldn't script this workplace any better.
From King Scott's Lee's Chicken mascot misery and the great trunk-or-treat debate to The Lost Boys costumes, a Ballpark Village contest meltdown, Halloween nostalgia, daylight saving time confusion, and the strangest news of the weekend, this funny podcast delivers another round of St. Louis morning-show chaos.
It's a mix of daily humor, weird news, ridiculous personal stories, pop culture commentary, and sarcastic observations from people who have somehow turned making fun of each other into a career.
So if you're looking for a funny podcast that understands the importance of full-size candy bars, appreciates a six-week homemade Xenomorph costume, and recognizes the comedy potential of a producer trapped inside a chicken, you've come to the right place.
Hit play, keep your hands to yourself at costume contests, and remember: just because somebody has a clipboard doesn't mean they're in charge.
And somebody get King Scott a fan.
Preferably before he's fully cooked.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Mariah Carey secretly made '90s alternative rock, Michael Jordan might have bought himself a brand-new head of hair, and Martha Stewart somehow turned Halloween into a public-relations nightmare. Welcome to November, where the decorations change overnight but the bad decisions remain year-round.
It's another Monday on The Rizzuto Show, and Rizz, Moon Valjean, Rafe Williams, and King Scott are diving headfirst into celebrity gossip, bizarre Halloween costumes, music industry surprises, and the important question nobody was asking: What happens when Michael Jordan decides being a billionaire isn't enough and he needs hair, too?
Meanwhile, King Scott is still trapped inside a giant Lee's Famous Recipe Chicken mascot costume thanks to his NFL Pick'em punishment. The head is heavy, the ventilation is questionable, and after an hour, his neck feels like it's being compressed by a very angry bucket of fried chicken.
It's everything you want from a funny podcast: weird news, sarcastic humor, pop culture commentary, and a grown man slowly discovering why professional mascots deserve hazard pay.
First up: Mariah Carey has officially defrosted for Christmas. But this year, she's bringing a secret rock-and-roll past with her.
The Queen of Christmas has returned with her annual announcement that the holiday season has begun, and this time her video opens with something completely unexpected: a song from her little-known 1990s alternative-rock project, Chick.
Yes, THAT Mariah Carey.
Before the Christmas magic takes over, the crew gets a taste of the alternative-rock music she recorded decades ago. It's a side of Mariah that most fans probably never expected, and naturally, the band name creates an entirely different problem for Rafe.
Because apparently you can't mention a '90s rock band on this show without somebody making it weird.
The conversation quickly turns into the annual Christmas creep debate. King Scott is ready to put up the decorations on November 1st. Rizz loves Christmas but thinks everybody needs to calm down and let Thanksgiving exist for approximately five minutes.
Moon is fine with the early celebration, Rafe is busy questioning the phrase "Christmas creep," and nobody can agree on when the holiday season should officially begin.
Next: Michael Jordan has hair. Maybe. And Rizz doesn't know how to process it.
Photos circulating online appear to show Michael Jordan sporting a full head of hair while spending time in Europe.
The crew isn't even sure the pictures are legitimate, but that doesn't stop them from launching a full investigation into the possible return of His Airness's hairline.
Is it a transplant? A hairpiece? An unusually convincing photograph? Did Jordan travel to Turkey for a little cosmetic maintenance?
Moon thinks the look is fantastic. Rizz admits it doesn't look bad, but he's emotionally attached to the bald Michael Jordan he's known for decades.
Rafe has a better theory: Jordan is so competitive that he might have gotten hair just to beat LeBron James at one more thing.
The gang also revisits Jordan's famously questionable facial-hair choices, including that unforgettable 2010 Hanes commercial featuring a toothbrush mustache.
Some legends retire their jerseys. Apparently others retire their razors and reconsider the entire arrangement.
Then comes the celebrity Halloween costume controversy nobody needed: Martha Stewart dressed as a homeless person.
The lifestyle mogul reportedly posted photos of herself in disheveled clothing, holding a cardboard sign asking for help, and faced backlash over the costume.
Martha later explained that she intended to raise awareness about homelessness, but the crew has a few questions about whether dressing up as someone experiencing poverty is the best way for an extremely wealthy celebrity to make that point.
Rafe delivers a particularly brutal costume review, Rizz questions the decision-making process, and Moon explains the public reaction.
The conversation also covers Macaulay Culkin's controversial Halloween makeup, which some viewers reportedly mistook for a very different movie reference than the World War II image he was recreating.
On the opposite end of the Halloween spectrum, Heidi Klum continues her annual tradition of making everybody else's costume look like something purchased at a gas station.
Her latest elaborate look? A gigantic severed hand based on a scan of her actual hand.
Because apparently dressing as a vampire or a ghost is simply too pedestrian when you're Heidi Klum.
And the celebrity chaos doesn't stop there.
The gang discusses Jack Nicholson's quiet retirement from acting and the rare updates about how he's spending his time away from Hollywood. This somehow turns into a debate about his final movie, the various famous Brookses, and whether anybody can keep James L. Brooks, Albert Brooks, and Mel Brooks straight.
They also react to a report about Selma Blair's alleged airplane incident and subsequent public apology, including the legal allegations discussed in the entertainment report. The crew has very little patience for people who allegedly mistreat flight attendants, regardless of how famous they are.
Then there's filmmaker Michael Mann, whose reported accidental injury during target practice sends the show down a rabbit hole about Heat, one of the most iconic movie shootouts ever filmed.
Rizz and Rafe revisit the film's incredible action sequences, Val Kilmer's weapon-handling performance, the legendary Al Pacino and Robert De Niro diner scene, and the planned Heat 2.
If you've ever wanted to hear a serious conversation about cinematic gunfights immediately interrupted by somebody making a ridiculous joke, congratulations. You've found your people.
Meanwhile, Bill Murray is heading to Ireland to play golf, and the crew has mixed feelings.
A discussion of Murray's upcoming golf docuseries leads to stories about his unpredictable public persona, his dislike of selfies, and past allegations surrounding his behavior on film sets.
The question becomes whether Bill Murray's famous spontaneous antics are charming, exhausting, or entirely dependent on which side of the interaction you're standing on.
And in music news, James Hetfield apparently wanted Turnstile to tour with Metallica. Turnstile had other plans.
According to the conversation, Metallica expressed interest in bringing the band on tour, but Turnstile preferred to keep doing its own thing.
Instead of taking offense, Hetfield reportedly respected the decision.
The crew talks about how unusual it is to turn down an opportunity involving one of the biggest metal bands on the planet—and why being successful enough to say no might be the ultimate rock-star move.
Plus, the show celebrates St. Louis rapper Nelly's birthday, remembers the careers of other celebrity birthday honorees, and discovers the surprisingly unusual family connection between legendary ring announcers Michael and Bruce Buffer.
Two half-brothers, both in the business of announcing fights, who didn't meet until adulthood?
Even Rafe couldn't write a more suspiciously convenient origin story.
And somewhere in the middle of all this, the crew celebrates raising more than $20,000 for Cardinal Glennon Children's Hospital, with a bonus week of the show's Hats of the Week fundraiser still underway. A genuinely great moment buried beneath approximately forty minutes of nonsense.
From Mariah Carey's secret music career and Michael Jordan's mysterious hair to celebrity Halloween disasters, Hollywood gossip, Metallica tour stories, and the ongoing suffering of King Scott, this funny podcast has a little something for everybody.
Especially people who enjoy watching successful adults make decisions that require a lengthy public explanation afterward.
That's the magic of The Rizzuto Show: a St. Louis comedy talk show where the celebrity news is bizarre, the opinions are unnecessarily passionate, and the producer is dressed like an entrée.
If you're looking for a funny podcast packed with daily humor, entertainment gossip, weird news, music stories, and the occasional emotional crisis over a basketball legend's hairstyle, you're in exactly the right place.
Hit play. November is already off the rails.
And somebody please get King Scott out of that chicken costume before he becomes a combo meal.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
A Halloween costume contest ends with somebody getting thrown out, Rizz is convinced trunk-or-treat is stealing childhood, and King Scott is slowly roasting inside a giant chicken costume. It's Monday on The Rizzuto Show, and apparently Halloween wasn't finished embarrassing people.
Halloween weekend is officially in the rearview mirror, but the chaos has followed everybody straight back into the studio. Rizz, Moon Valjean, Rafe Williams, and King Scott are recovering from costumes, candy, questionable decisions, and a sold-out Halloween party at Ballpark Village that somehow managed to produce both incredible costumes and a grown adult behaving like a toddler who didn't get enough Reese's.
And because this is a funny podcast, we're going to discuss every last ridiculous detail.
First up: King Scott has officially become poultry.
Mascot Week continues after Scott's NFL Pick'em punishment, and today's humiliation comes courtesy of Lee's Famous Recipe Chicken. The costume has a giant head, oversized gloves, and approximately the same ventilation as a microwave.
Scott can barely see, he's sweating through the feathers, and the crew is already wondering how he's supposed to produce a radio show with chicken hands.
The good news? Only one mascot day remains, with a Battlehawks costume waiting for the grand finale.
The bad news? Scott still has to survive being a chicken.
Meanwhile, the NFL Pick'em competition has finally delivered something resembling a victory. The Rizz Show manages to beat The Fast Lane for the first time this season, Lern and Scott finish at the top of the weekly standings, and the next punishment comes down to Moon and Rafe's opposing picks in Monday Night Football.
Then comes the Halloween debate nobody knew could get this heated: Is trunk-or-treat ruining trick-or-treating?
Rizz thinks traditional Halloween is losing some of its magic. Remember when kids grabbed a pillowcase, hit the neighborhood with their friends, and walked until they couldn't carry another miniature candy bar?
Now some families collect candy in a parking lot from the trunks of decorated SUVs.
Moon argues that trunk-or-treat is just another activity, especially for younger kids and families who don't have walkable neighborhoods. Rizz admits there are benefits, but he's worried about what happens when the parking lot replaces the actual neighborhood adventure.
The conversation becomes a full-blown nostalgia trip through terrible 1980s Halloween costumes, razor-sharp plastic masks, rubber bands that snapped after three houses, and store-bought outfits that were basically decorated garbage bags.
Rizz remembers dressing as Yoda in a costume that looked suspiciously like Hefty sponsored it.
Rafe recalls his mother's homemade Glow Worm costume for his little brother, which looks considerably less innocent when viewed through adult eyes.
And Moon just wants kids to keep trick-or-treating so his neighborhood doesn't turn into a ghost town.
Speaking of Halloween, the Ballpark Village party was an absolute spectacle.
Rizz and Rafe recap the sold-out St. Louis Halloween celebration, complete with massive crowds, incredible music, and costumes that looked like they belonged on a Hollywood movie set.
The winning costume was an enormous Alien xenomorph on stilts that reportedly took six weeks to build. A terrifying Ghostbusters terror dog, an elaborate SpongeBob SquarePants group, and other impressive creations helped make the competition one of the night's highlights.
Unfortunately, one attendee apparently didn't appreciate being left out of the contest.
The crew explains that Ballpark Village staff select the finalists, not The Rizzuto Show. That distinction apparently didn't stop one upset guest from making a scene.
According to Rizz, the individual even shoved his wife while she was taking photos near the stage. The situation escalated, and the person was ultimately removed from the event.
Imagine getting kicked out of a Halloween party because you thought your costume deserved an award.
That's a level of commitment to losing that even King Scott would respect.
But the costume drama doesn't end there.
Rizz's friend Jeremy dressed as a referee and started handing out red cards to unsuspecting partygoers. Some people apparently believed he had actual authority and left when he blew the whistle.
This leads to a fascinatingly stupid discussion about Halloween costumes that make strangers automatically obey you.
Construction workers with clipboards. Sound technicians with headsets. Valet attendants with keys. Airline pilots with serious expressions.
Apparently all you need to control a crowded room is a reflective vest, a clipboard, and the confidence of somebody who has never been questioned in his entire life.
Rafe also discovers that his Lost Boys saxophone-player costume is either a brilliant movie reference or a convincing disguise for an actual musician, depending on how much the person looking at him knows about 1980s vampire movies.
The crew also celebrates the greatest gift of Halloween weekend: an extra hour of sleep.
Rizz describes the magical moment when he watched his phone clock fall backward from 2 a.m. to 1 a.m. after the party.
For a man approaching 50, discovering an unexpected extra hour of sleep might be more exciting than the entire Halloween event.
Naturally, the discussion turns into the never-ending debate over daylight saving time, permanent standard time, and whether the government will ever stop making everybody adjust their clocks twice a year.
Moon wants to know why everyone still feels exhausted despite getting an extra hour.
Rafe points out that attending two Halloween parties in your 40s is a very effective way to feel terrible regardless of what time it is.
Elsewhere in this episode, the gang discusses disturbing footage and reports surrounding a private plane crash in Florida, the conspiracy theories that immediately followed, and why serious breaking news seems to attract internet detectives with more confidence than evidence.
The weird news doesn't let up, either. A reported Cleveland ambulance incident leaves the crew stunned after a driver allegedly abandoned a patient experiencing chest pain and took an Uber home.
Because apparently some people have decided that the end of their shift is more important than the entire purpose of their job.
Between the Halloween aftermath, football punishment drama, costume-contest meltdowns, childhood nostalgia, strange news stories, and Rafe's ongoing ability to make every conversation slightly more concerning, this funny podcast delivers another perfectly dysfunctional morning in St. Louis.
It's the kind of daily comedy where one minute you're having a thoughtful discussion about childhood traditions, and the next you're debating whether a guy dressed as a referee can legally eject you from a bar.
And somehow, King Scott is still wearing a chicken head.
If you love sarcastic humor, weird news, funny stories, St. Louis entertainment, and a morning talk show that treats every minor inconvenience like a national emergency, this funny podcast has everything you need.
Hit play, enjoy the Halloween hangover, and remember: just because you dressed like an authority figure doesn't mean you're actually in charge.
Unless you're wearing a referee costume.
Then apparently everybody listens.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
A Red Baron employee finally snaps at an internet prankster, 1994 makes a convincing case for being the greatest year in alternative rock history, and Rafe Williams writes a play about George Washington secretly being Martha Washington. Welcome to Friday on The Rizzuto Show. We're sorry, America.
It's another spectacularly chaotic Friday in St. Louis as Rizz, Moon Valjean, Rafe Williams, and King Scott tackle viral meltdowns, bizarre crime stories, rock music nostalgia, giant pickup trucks, flying cars, celebrity gossip, and a business idea so ridiculous it could only come from this crew: Pee at the Pump.
Lern is off to Chicago, Scott is dressed like a salad, and everybody else is doing their absolute best to make this funny podcast sound like a legitimate morning radio program.
Results are mixed.
The Red Baron employee who became everybody's hero
First up, a viral video from Michigan has the entire internet rallying behind a hardworking Red Baron frozen pizza employee named Walt.
While stocking pizzas at a grocery store, Walt is approached by teenage pranksters who pretend to steal money from his phone using a fake Apple Pay sound.
What starts as another obnoxious social media prank quickly becomes something much more emotional.
Walt explains that he's exhausted, working long hours, struggling to pay his mortgage, and missing time with his four kids. He doesn't have the energy to become somebody else's viral content.
And honestly, neither do the rest of us.
The crew listens to the confrontation, discusses why harassing strangers for views has become such an irritating trend, and celebrates the reported response from people who recognized themselves in Walt's frustration.
According to the figures discussed on the show, an online fundraiser had already collected approximately $335,000 from more than 9,000 donors.
That's a pretty incredible turnaround for a guy who was just trying to put frozen pizzas in a freezer.
Naturally, the conversation also becomes a debate about where Red Baron ranks against Tombstone, Totino's, and the rest of America's frozen pizza royalty.
Because even an unexpectedly touching human-interest story must eventually become an argument about dinner.
1994: The year alternative rock grew up
Moon has been arguing for years that 1994 was the greatest year in alternative rock history, and Rizz finally brings the receipts.
Inspired by a video from Tim of Kicking Harold, the guys revisit an astonishing run of albums that helped define the sound of the '90s.
Green Day's Dookie. Soundgarden's Superunknown. The Offspring's Smash. Weezer's Blue Album. Stone Temple Pilots' Purple. Live's Throwing Copper. Oasis' Definitely Maybe. R.E.M.'s Monster. Korn's debut. Pearl Jam's Vitalogy. Bush's Sixteen Stone.
And somehow, that's not even the whole list.
Moon remembers what it felt like to grow up in St. Louis as 105.7 The Point was helping introduce listeners to a wave of music that would dominate alternative radio for decades.
Rizz makes the case for 1991 as another legendary year, and the crew debates whether anything could match the sheer volume of classic songs released in 1994.
Then comes the emotional damage.
The guys discover that bands like Green Day, Foo Fighters, Blink-182, Weezer, Korn, and The Offspring are increasingly being labeled dad rock.
That's right. The bands that once made your parents nervous are now apparently the soundtrack to mowing your lawn.
Congratulations on surviving the '90s. Your reward is lower back pain and music that qualifies as nostalgia.
The crew also digs into the surprising history of legendary rock artists who never reached number one on the Billboard Hot 100, proving that being iconic and winning the charts aren't necessarily the same thing.
America's deadliest trucks and the future of flying cars
Next, Rizz introduces a study examining the danger gap between how well certain vehicles protect their own drivers and the risks they pose to other people in collisions.
The discussion centers on enormous pickup trucks like the Ram 3500, Chevy Silverado 3500, Ram 2500, and Ford F-150 SuperCrew.
Rafe remembers driving a tiny Mazda pickup without power steering, Moon explains why his wife prefers a giant SUV, and Rizz makes it clear that he appreciates having a little extra metal between himself and the rest of traffic.
The crew debates whether oversized trucks are making American roads safer or simply turning every smaller vehicle into an unwilling participant in a demolition derby.
Then the conversation moves from dangerous vehicles on the ground to potentially dangerous vehicles in the sky.
Would you actually ride in a flying car?
Rizz is interested.
Moon is deeply skeptical.
Rafe wants to know whether we're talking about a real flying car or something straight out of Back to the Future.
The guys also discover a flying glider inspired by the Green Goblin from Spider-Man, revisit the obscure 1980s cartoon The Flying House, and wonder whether humanity should really be developing airborne automobiles before figuring out how to make ordinary driving less miserable.
A murder suspect, a cheesesteak, and the strangest negotiations imaginable
The weird news keeps coming with a story involving a murder suspect and a cheesesteak deal.
Because apparently even a serious criminal investigation can somehow become a conversation about lunch.
The gang digs into the absurdity of a food-related negotiation, reminding everyone that the real world continues to produce stories no comedy writer would dare pitch.
It's exactly the kind of unusual news that makes The Rizzuto Show feel less like a traditional morning talk show and more like four guys trying to figure out whether reality has finally become a parody of itself.
Introducing Pee at the Pump
And just when you think the discussion about transportation has reached its logical conclusion, the crew begins designing the gas station of the future.
Moon imagines a world where your vehicle knows you're hungry, orders food ahead of time, arranges your fuel stop, and has everything ready when you arrive.
Rizz likes the convenience.
Rafe sees an even bigger opportunity.
Pee at the Pump.
The concept is simple, horrifying, and probably one bad investor meeting away from becoming a real startup.
Why walk all the way inside a convenience store when you could have a tiny restroom stall right next to the gas pump?
The guys brainstorm how it would work, whether the stall would unlock only while you're pumping gas, and why convenience stores might not be thrilled about customers skipping the opportunity to buy roller dogs and overpriced snacks.
It's the sort of revolutionary thinking that makes you wonder why these men aren't running a Fortune 500 company.
Then you remember the actual idea.
George Washington in drag: The theatrical event nobody requested
Rafe's weekly In Memoriam returns with a performance that may be the greatest threat to American historical education since the invention of the internet.
After the crew previously joked that portraits of George and Martha Washington looked suspiciously alike, Rafe writes a fictional stage comedy called Mrs. Washington Fire.
The premise is that George Washington and Martha Washington are secretly the same person.
Moon plays Thomas Jefferson.
Rafe plays both Washingtons.
Rizz reads the stage directions.
And the entire production unfolds like Mrs. Doubtfire performed by a group of men who should absolutely not be trusted with the history curriculum.
There are suspicious costume changes, questionable accents, colonial makeup, and increasingly desperate explanations for why George and Martha are never seen together.
It's historically ridiculous, completely fictional, and exactly the kind of original comedy that makes this funny podcast impossible to explain to somebody who has never heard the show.
Rafe's In Memoriam also revisits Lern's expensive wellness retreat, the bizarre viral claim about a man addicted to humping the air, and the listener who described an alleged ghost that just wanted to cuddle.
Because apparently even ghosts can't find a healthy relationship these days.
Celebrity chaos, aging rock fans, and King Scott's vegetable punishment
The crew's Crap on Celebrities segment brings more entertainment gossip, including discussions about Star Trek, Hollywood nostalgia, movie memorabilia, and the possibility of another Austin Powers film.
There's also a tribute to the Star Trek performers whose reported deaths the show discusses, with Rafe delivering a Captain Kirk-style farewell that somehow manages to be heartfelt and sarcastic at the same time.
Meanwhile, King Scott continues paying the price for losing the NFL Pick'em challenge.
Thanks to Crushed Red, his mascot punishment has evolved from a giant toasted ravioli into an entire lunch menu.
Scott starts the day dressed as lettuce, with avocado and pizza costumes waiting in the wings.
The crew considers turning his costume changes into a three-course meal.
Scott considers how much longer he has to endure this humiliation.
And the listeners get another reminder that the Rizz Show's football predictions are about as reliable as its fashion choices.
Rizz's mysterious water damage becomes a paranormal investigation
To round out the chaos, Rizz has a very real homeowner problem: his kitchen's hardwood floors are buckling, moisture is collecting underneath them, and nobody seems willing to fix the issue until somebody else identifies the cause.
Moon suggests plumbers and restoration specialists.
Rafe sympathizes with the frustration of finding a contractor willing to tackle an unusual project.
Listeners send recommendations.
Somebody inevitably suggests Ghostbusters.
And Rizz becomes increasingly irritated that a serious home-repair question has turned into a discussion about a possible moisture ghost.
To make matters worse, King Scott starts offering advice while dressed like a giant piece of pizza.
Rizz is not taking plumbing recommendations from dinner.
St. Louis shows up for Cardinal Glennon
Amid the ridiculous stories and relentless roasting, the crew also celebrates the generosity of the St. Louis community.
Through October hat sponsorships, Hollow Weirdo sticker sales, and billboard events, listeners and local businesses have helped raise money for Cardinal Glennon Children's Hospital.
Rizz reports that the fundraising effort appears to have passed $20,000, with the final total still being calculated.
It's a genuinely great reminder that underneath all the mascot costumes, terrible ideas, and sarcastic humor, this community knows how to show up when it matters.
From a viral Red Baron worker finally catching a break to the golden age of alternative rock, from dangerous pickup trucks to flying Green Goblin gliders, and from George Washington's imaginary double life to a gas station bathroom concept nobody should ever finance, this funny podcast is another gloriously unpredictable installment of The Rizzuto Show.
Hit play, crank up your favorite 1994 album, leave the frozen pizza employees alone, and remember: just because somebody can invent a flying car doesn't mean Rafe Williams should be allowed to invent a gas station bathroom.
And if you see a giant piece of lettuce walking around St. Louis, don't panic.
It's probably just King Scott.
Probably.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
America's biggest pickup trucks might be terrifying everyone else on the road, Elon Musk has the crew arguing about flying cars, and Rafe Williams has written a historical comedy in which George Washington is secretly his own wife. Somehow, the most realistic part of this episode is the flying car.
Welcome back to The Rizzuto Show, where the roads are getting more dangerous, the future of transportation looks increasingly ridiculous, and American history is about to receive a theatrical adaptation that absolutely nobody requested.
With Lern out of the studio, Rizz, Moon Valjean, Rafe Williams, and King Scott are holding down the fort for another funny podcast featuring bizarre news, questionable technology, St. Louis homeowner problems, and one of the most spectacularly unnecessary historical performances ever attempted on morning radio.
America's deadliest pickup trucks
First up, Rizz introduces a study examining the enormous safety gap between drivers of certain oversized vehicles and the unfortunate people who collide with them.
The concept is called the danger gap: a comparison of how well a vehicle protects its own driver versus the fatality risk it presents to drivers of other vehicles.
And according to the study discussed on the show, some of America's biggest pickup trucks are practically rolling fortresses.
The Ram 3500 Crew Cab, Chevy Silverado 3500, Ram 2500, Ford F-150 SuperCrew, and Chevy Silverado 2500 all make the list of vehicles with especially concerning differences in crash outcomes.
Rafe discusses his Toyota Tacoma Trailhunter and remembers the good old days of driving a tiny manual-transmission Mazda pickup without power steering.
Moon admits his wife loves driving enormous SUVs because they make her feel safer.
Rizz, meanwhile, has a refreshingly simple approach to sharing the highway with a giant truck: get out of its way.
Because apparently the unofficial rule of American driving is that whoever has the most pounds of metal wins.
The crew debates whether these massive vehicles make everyone safer, whether they're just protecting their own occupants, and why modern pickup trucks increasingly look like they were designed to tow an aircraft carrier.
Would you ride in a flying car?
From gigantic trucks to cars that supposedly don't need roads, the conversation moves straight into the future.
Rizz brings up Elon Musk's flying-car demonstrations and asks the crew a simple question: If somebody offered you a ride in a flying car, would you take it?
Moon says absolutely not.
He isn't convinced the technology is ready for everyday use, and he has no intention of climbing into something that resembles a helicopter with extra marketing.
Rizz thinks it looks awesome.
Rafe is willing to entertain the idea, provided we're talking about an actual flying car and not a publicity stunt with wheels.
A poll discussed on the show suggests Americans are divided on the idea, with younger men particularly interested and older adults considerably less enthusiastic.
Naturally, the conversation turns into a debate about whether society needs flying cars when regular groceries already cost a fortune.
Rafe also introduces the guys to a real-world flying contraption inspired by the Green Goblin's glider from Spider-Man, complete with propellers and a rider hovering above the ground.
Rizz is impressed.
Moon is concerned about the obvious possibility of falling.
And Rafe seems perfectly willing to volunteer as long as somebody promises to film it.
The crew even revisits the obscure 1980s animated series The Flying House, because apparently the future of aviation is being developed by people who watched too many Saturday morning cartoons.
It's the kind of technology discussion that begins with genuine curiosity and ends with everybody arguing about whether a flying skateboard is worth potentially breaking every bone in your body.
George Washington meets Mrs. Doubtfire
Then comes the segment that may permanently ruin your understanding of American history.
It's time for Rafe's weekly In Memoriam, the show's sarcastic farewell to the ridiculous stories, arguments, and questionable decisions from the past several days.
And Rafe has apparently been thinking a little too much about George and Martha Washington.
After the crew previously joked that portraits of George and Martha looked suspiciously similar, Rafe develops a completely fictional historical comedy called Mrs. Washington Fire.
The premise?
What if George Washington and Martha Washington were secretly the same person?
Yes, it's Mrs. Doubtfire at Mount Vernon.
And yes, Rafe actually wrote a scene.
Moon plays Thomas Jefferson, complete with an inexplicable accent that sounds suspiciously like Patrick Stewart.
Rafe plays both George and Martha Washington.
Rizz handles the stage directions.
The story follows Jefferson as he grows increasingly suspicious that George and Martha are never in the same room at the same time.
There are awkward costume changes, suspicious facial hair, enormous colonial accessories, and enough historical inaccuracies to make a social studies teacher request immediate retirement.
The dramatic climax involves George Washington confessing that he wanted to be more than the father of his country.
He wanted to be its mother, too.
Somebody call Broadway.
Actually, don't. We don't need to encourage this.
Rafe's In Memoriam gets even weirder
The historical theater experiment is only one part of Rafe's weekly comedy tribute.
He also revisits Lern's $500 women's wellness retreat in Innsbrook, Missouri, where yoga, journaling, sound baths, and spiritual enlightenment become material for an absolutely ruthless roast.
Then there's the viral story about a man who claims to be addicted to humping the air, which Rafe revisits with jokes about the world's least demanding romantic partner.
The crew acknowledges the story may not even be genuine, but that doesn't stop them from discussing the sheer absurdity of it.
Rafe also brings back the listener who described an alleged ghost cuddling experience while recovering from injuries after military service.
According to the listener, the mysterious presence wanted nothing more than to cuddle until he eventually asked a priest for help.
Rafe's interpretation?
The poor ghost was just lonely.
It's a funny podcast where even the supernatural apparently can't catch a break in the dating world.
The segment concludes with a more heartfelt, if still occasionally sarcastic, tribute to the Star Trek performers whose reported deaths the crew discussed during the week.
Rafe delivers a Captain Kirk-inspired farewell to Captain Picard and Chekov, celebrating the legacy of Star Trek while finding room for jokes about aging convention fans, Klingon pronunciation, and collectible merchandise.
Because on this show, even a touching farewell has to survive at least one joke about the men's room.
Rizz's floors are falling apart, and nobody wants to fix them
Just when the episode seems incapable of becoming any more ridiculous, Rizz reveals a genuine domestic crisis.
His kitchen's real wood flooring is buckling.
There's moisture underneath it.
Nobody can figure out where the water is coming from.
And the flooring contractors he's contacted won't touch the job until somebody identifies the underlying problem.
Rizz is stuck in the ultimate homeowner nightmare: every professional agrees something is wrong, but nobody wants to be the person responsible for figuring it out.
Moon suggests calling a plumber, restoration specialist, or general contractor.
Rafe shares his own frustrating experience trying to find someone willing to cut old Plexiglas panels for a home project.
Scott offers suggestions while dressed as a giant piece of pizza.
And Rizz makes it very clear that he is not interested in taking home-repair advice from a man currently wearing dinner.
Listeners begin texting their recommendations, including the inevitable suggestion to call Ghostbusters.
Rizz insists there is no ghost.
Moon suggests there might be a moisture ghost.
And suddenly the most practical problem discussed all morning has turned into a paranormal investigation.
It's a reminder that homeownership is mostly just paying a mortgage while discovering new ways your house can disappoint you.
Between the massive trucks, flying-car arguments, superhero-inspired gliders, Rafe's colonial theater production, and Rizz's mysterious water damage, this funny podcast delivers another spectacularly strange dose of St. Louis morning show comedy.
Hit play, give the giant pickup trucks some space, think twice before boarding a flying skateboard, and remember: if George Washington and Martha Washington are never in the same room together, Rafe Williams apparently has some questions.
And if anybody knows how to fix a buckling kitchen floor, Rizz would appreciate a call.
Just don't suggest Ghostbusters.
Follow The Rizzuto Show → linktr.ee/rizzshow for more from your favorite daily comedy show.
Connect with The Rizzuto Show Comedy Podcast online → 1057thepoint.com/RizzShow.
Hear The Rizz Show daily on the radio at 105.7 The Point | Hubbard Radio in St. Louis, MO.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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