This week, our hero seeks help from the great beyond. After accepting the holy light into his orifices, he feels confident enough to go out into the world and conquer any challenge that may befell upon his breast -including but not limited to hydroplaning into a small crack in the local drawbridge.

Our hero finds himself alone in a bathroom stall, mouth full of rice and butt full of gas. In the air, a foreign plume of fecal matter drifts across the ceiling, taunting him as he fulfills his stomach's purpose for the sake of survival.

On this week's episode of Euphoria, Dominic Fike walks in on a tragic scene: Asian Medley, sprawled out all over the floor, its contents leaking through the wooden boards of his studio apartment. Fike crumbles and falls to his knees, trying desperately to pick up the pieces and restore Medley. He stops when he realizes that his one true love was a fraud. Asian Medley did not contain his favorite vegetable, baby corns, but instead, it was full of carrots. Just carrots. Fike stands up and runs out of the house in horror, vowing never to fall in love with a bag of Bird's Eye Asian Medley ever again.

How do we safeguard the trans community in the sports realm? Should you plunge your own clogged toilet in public spaces? Is the "When You Were Young" festival a scam? Will climate change make a comeback if Greta Thunberg comes out of the closet? These are the questions posed in this episode of The J Team.

On this weeks episode of The Saloon, our hero finds himself amidst a harrowing scene, gazing into the brown eye of a powerful elder. Following this encounter, he returns home to engage in slumber, only to find himself lost in a sea of numbers. A dream, yes, but soon this dream turns malevolent as he is viciously pulled from his sacred world into a void realm in which he can not control. How will our hero survive such events? Will he invoke the memories of his past to find the answers? Find out on this new and exciting episode of Unfabulous.

Our hero has found himself on the brink of extinction. A feral plant has turned him inside out and the local villagers believe him to be a witch. Eyes red as marinara sauce,

Mikey joins the hit children's show Paw Patrol as the new Equity Inclusivity De-escalation Coordinator. As such, Mikey is tasked to defund and reassign our heroes, while simultaneously educate them through a series of classes aimed at minimizing police presence in target areas of high crime. On this episode of The Saloon, the Paw Patrol discover their newfound purpose while balancing the necessary punishment of paid leave and employer benefits.

Please donate to our GoFundMe which aims to finance men and women who have been exiled by their partners and families for picking their nose. "Normalize Nose Picking" has already reached $3.00, which is $4.00 shy of our goal. All proceeds directly feed and shelter our victims, as well as provide a safe space to pick and fling freely. Thank you for supporting our mission.

The major and trusted news organizations such as CNN and Fox News are not covering the real threats to this great nation. Disney China and The United States of Amazon are the least of our worries, as legitimate risk plague the world on the daily basis. Celi, the humble savior of the egotistical race of humanity, describes exactly where we should turn our attention.

Mikey introduces his new podcast which is sponsored, written, and produced by Greta Thunberg. This weekly entertainment was created in an attempt to clear her name, as she did not cause the devastation that transpired on that one, fateful September morning.