We're baaaaack and we're talking Housewives. Analisa is deep in the OC. Becky's Bravodextrous. And Meesh is double-watching every new Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. And boy, do we have a lot to talk about when it comes to our lovely ladies of Utah. 

RIP hot girl summer. Long live whatever this is? It's time for The Speak Sleazy to catch up on episodes 2 and 3 of Love Island: Beyond the Villa on Peacock, a program that is a lot of things, but mostly it's a show we committed to watching. We love Aaron and we aren't sorry (yet). We need more Leah and Miguel screen time and fewer fake birthday parties (and relationships). Zac and Dylan Efron make a cameo. BUT NOT HOW YOU'D THINK. Hashtag they're brothers.

Meesh-heads, rise up! A new Love Island show has entered, er, exited the villa. And that can mean only one thing: The Speak Sleazy is recapping season one of Love Island: Beyond the Villa. For the premiere, we're building up to a party and a two-part meltdown starring Kaylor and Liv. Sorry but Aaron's hair looks great and there's simply nothing we can do about it!!!!

And we found it. America crowns a winning couple for Love Island USA 2025. And is anyone actually surprised? Not on The Speak Sleazy. But that doesn't mean we don't have 181374 things to discuss like Huda's patented (and yet failed) countdown method, the best dresses of the declarations of love ceremony, wolf nose nipples?? and how pretty Ariana's hair looks. Don't worry. Unlike SOME episodes, this one is not two hours long.

Butts out for the parents, sir. It's family day and ~*FINAL FOUR*~ day in the villa. Oh boy is the boo-hooing bountiful. The Speak Sleazy podcast is recapping the peaks and pits of Love Island USA episode 34. There will be tears. There will be dancing. There will be topknot malfunctions that only Analisa can see. And yet, we persisted.

OR IS IT. We might be having a brain moment, but — unlike Chris — The Speak Sleazy has a lot of thoughts about episode 33 of Love Island USA season 7. Bryan and Amaya do a Parent Trap. Ace and Chelley are setting the table, er, drawing the sand heart to win back America's love. And, finally, we get a challenge that's actually cute and captures our sparkly gold hearts! Viva las Villa. Taylor has left the building. But his ghost will haunt us forever.

America is out here being a hater to Clarke and Taylor. And we feel like Ariana Grande licking that doughnut. What the helly, indeed. The Speak Sleazy is recapping Love Island USA episode 372341 of season 7. A.k.a. actually episode 32. And honestly, bro, we are lowkey bummed. Like not so bummed that we'd wear socks at the beach. But it's not outside the realm of possibility. Thanks for loving us anyway, bro. 

Love Island USA episode 31 had everything: horrible robot babies whose clothes MUST BE FOLDED, Chris ... ahem ... folding, little aliens, nihilism-inspiring s'mores and, heaven help us, "Nicky poo." Huda predicted it would be fun to watch. But The Speak Sleazy will be the judge of that!

Everyone with an Al Pacino tattoo, we're going DYE SKIVING. Cierra had a "personal situation." Taylor dreams of rodeos. And Nicolandria is happening just as the sages, um, foretold? We're recapping episode 30 of Love Island USA season 7 for the rest of our days. Give The Speak Sleazy five stars if you wanna be the water to our fireness.

What's covered in dry slime, grandma dresses and dagger-to-the-heart betrayal? This Speak Sleazy recap of episode 28 of Love Island USA season 7.