In this solo episode of The Survivor’s Chair Podcast, host Kim Russell opens up about the messy, real, and deeply human transitions women face in their 40s, 50s, and beyond.
From closing her 30-year salon to navigating menopause, caregiving for a mother with dementia, and surviving HER2-positive breast cancer, Kim shares the lessons hidden inside each life shift.
For decades, Kim put herself last—overgiving, overworking, people-pleasing, and powering through.
But midlife has a way of exposing what no longer fits.
With raw honesty, Kim explores:
* The exhaustion of caretaking and why women don't make it on their own list
* How menopause, hormones, and exhaustion spark a demand for change
* The connection between trauma, nervous system dysregulation, and mast cell activation
* Why cancer became her “hard stop”
* How therapy, boundaries, and tiny acts of self-care can shift patterns that feel impossible to change
If you’re an over-giver, perfectionist, or someone who feels “done” with being the caretaker—this episode is your permission slip to start small, speak up, and put yourself first.
Takeaways
Survival mode is not who you are—it’s a pattern you can shift.
Your body is always talking to you—listen before it screams.
You teach people how to treat you; when you make yourself last, they will too.
Five minutes of calm can be the beginning of change.
Midlife isn’t an ending—it’s a chance to live life on your terms.
midlife transitions for women, women over 50 self-care, menopause and mental health, people-pleasing and boundaries, HER2 positive breast cancer survivor, nervous system dysregulation survival mode, caregiving for parent, closing a business, breaking patterns in midlife, how to put yourself first women, signs your body is under chronic stress
Key Takeaways
Midlife often exposes long-held patterns—overgiving, people-pleasing, and silence—that no longer fit who we’re becoming.
Caretaking roles (children, partners, parents) can make women’s needs invisible; change begins by putting yourself on the list.
Menopause and hormonal shifts amplify exhaustion and irritability; naming it reduces shame and supports better choices.
The body “keeps the score”: chronic stress and survival mode can drive immune dysregulation (e.g., mast cell activation).
Surface-level talk therapy helped, but somatic awareness and pattern-breaking created deeper change.
Cancer was the “hard stop” that forced new boundaries, rest, and a life reset.
We teach people how to treat us; when our needs are nothing, others followed that script.
Closing a 30-year business can be an act of self-leadership when the work no longer aligns.
Start small -five minutes of nervous-system care (walk, journaling, nature, “moving meditation”) is a powerful first step.
Midlife question: “Am I doing this for me—or because it’s expected?”
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The Body Keeps the Score - Bessel Van Der Kolk - https://amzn.to/4mXRwrB (Amazon)