Alan powers through a toothache, shows off his DIY core board, and somehow ends up debating northern accents, oat‑milk lawsuits, and why he's currently fuelled by cow's milk instead of beer.

Ian brings the chaos with fitness trends gone wrong (yes, someone runs a 6‑minute mile just to justify fast food), questionable race branding like "Hyathlon," and the latest hybrid racing gossip.

They dive into: • The dog‑friendly OCR • AI vending machines behaving badly • Spartan's halftime challenge • DEKA's big marketing opportunity • OCR series updates & adaptive athlete wins • Judges get pay at Deadly Dozen • Six Nations predictions and England's chances

It's fast, funny, and full of the usual Swift Half tangents — from dodgy Amazon deliveries to sea‑creature TV shows.

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