The Teenage Guide

Did you know that the #1 way you have influence in your t(w)een's life is in your relationship?

There's nothing you can buy that will replace a high-quality relationship, the way you approach them, communicate, and guide them.

If you're wondering how to have a stronger relationship with them, you're in luck. Inside this episode I share 3 unintentional, yet common mistakes parents make that block closeness between you and your t(w)een, and what to do instead.

If you enjoy this episode, please like, subscribe, and share to continue the ripple effect and reach as many parents and teens as possible!

**p.s. Want to go deeper and find out how to get your t(w)een to listen to you and do what they need to do? ** Be sure to access Ashley's FREE Executive Function 101 guide here! >>

00:50 - Think Parenting a Teen Has to Be Miserable? Think Again.
02:04 - The Great Forgetting: Why Parents Lose Touch with the Teen Experience
03:19 - Stop Taking It Personally—It’s Not About You
04:03 - Curiosity Builds Emotional Safety—Not Control
05:15 - Be the Mirror—Not the Emotional Reaction
07:00 - Know Your Stress—So You Don’t Project It Onto Your Teen
08:07 - Biological Stress Impacts How You React—And How You Connect
08:58 - Cognitive Stress Makes You Snap—Not Think
09:28 - Social Stress Follows You Home—And Affects Your Parenting
09:58 - Other People’s Stress Can Dysregulate You Too
10:24 - Soul Stress: The Weight of a World That Hurts
10:52 - Master Your Stress—So They Don’t Think It’s Their Fault
11:44 - Let Go of Control—Trust They’ll Be Okay
12:39 - Be a Stress Reliever—Not a Stress Projector
15:23 - When Good Intentions Backfire—Melissa’s Story
17:00 - Are You Being a Guide—or Just Acting Like a Boss?
18:00 - Influence Starts with Ownership—Not Personalization or Projection
18:49 - Awareness of Stress = Power to Respond, Not React
19:12 - Stop Being a Sneaky Manager—Loosen the Reins
19:35 - Once You Loosen Control, Lean Into Trust

✨ Ashley

Is your tween or teen stepping into middle school, high school, or a new grade, and you’re both feeling anxious?

You’re not alone.

Transitioning into middle or high school is a big leap. Whether it's your kid's first or 3rd year, each year and stage varies and there are key things you must have on your radar.

In this episode, I’ll guide you through supporting your teen (and yourself) through academic and emotional changes—without stress, overwhelm, or clashing.
🎯 Inside you’ll discover:

If you enjoy this episode, please like, subscribe, and share to continue the ripple effect and reach as many parents and teens as possible! 

00:18 - What Every Parent Needs to Know Before a New School Year
02:15 - Your Teen’s Brain Is Under Construction—Don’t Take It Personally
03:37 - Call Out Their Fears—and Practice Facing Them Together
04:39 - Make Middle School Prep Fun—And Don’t Expect Too Much Too Soon
06:00 - Middle School Is for Practice—Not Perfection
07:37 - When It Hurts to Watch Them Struggle—Start at Home
08:18 - Your Self-Care Is the Anchor in Their Storm
10:07 - High School Is the Launch Pad—Go All In Now
11:18 - Future Pace Without Pressuring—Focus on the Inner Journey
12:05 - Future Pacing Starts with Strengths, Interests, and Vision
13:35 - Guide Your Teen with Trust, Boundaries, and Belief
14:48 - Trust Is Built in Micro Moments—Start by Looking in the Mirror
16:16 - Build Trust Now—So They Can Trust Themselves Later
17:25 - It’s Not Too Late—They Still Need You (and You Need You Too)
18:03 - Middle School Recap: Normalize Struggles, Embrace Growth, Focus on You
19:04 - Future Pace Without Pressure—And Stay Present While You Do It
20:09 - Prepare Them for Life Outside Your Home—One Skill at a Time
21:29 - Strong Relationships Start with How You Show Up

Find all the details about Ashley and her work here >>

✅ 1-on-1 Parent Coaching: Waitlist! Apply Now → https://www.jotform.com/form/240688718868174
✅ Teenage Guide to Finish School Strong: 50% OFF for just $27—help your teen navigate these last months with success! → https://www.theteenageguide.com/offers/xTz2nPfY

Follow Ashley on:
Instagram → the_teenage_guide
Facebook → The Teenage Guide

✨ Ashley

One of the most common questions I get asked is: How do I help my t(w)een have more confidence and feel good about themselves?

Inside this episode I break down the 4 keys you need to know in order to boost their self-confidence from the inside out. I help you get clear on where to focus your time and energy because you know these things are going to pay off in what I call "liking themselves when they're by themselves".

Remember, the #1 way you have influence in them feeling good about themselves is in your approach and inside your relationship. If you'd love even more support don't miss my next DO LISTEN TRUST CLASS - Happening Live throughout each week during this back-to-school season.

The link to register: www.theteenageguide.com/class or just head to my website to regsiter: www.theteenageguide.com

01:00 - Helping Your Teen Build Real Confidence Starts Here
01:51 - What Comes Out When We’re Squeezed Reveals What’s Inside
03:15 - When Your Teen Struggles with Self-Worth and You Feel Helpless
06:24 - How You Parent Shapes Your Teen’s Identity
07:05 - Help Your Teen See Themselves Without Judgment
08:04 - True Significance Comes from Real-World Impact
10:08 - Mutual Respect Matters More Than Matching Values
11:25 - Talk to Your Teen About Purpose—Not Just Plans
13:58 - Four Keys to Help Your Teen Feel Good from the Inside Out
15:35 - Real Parent Story: Shifting a Teen’s Self-Worth Through Connection

The way they treat themselves… starts with how you show up.
Let’s make it intentional.

✨ Ashley

Ever feel like your teen knows what to do… but just won’t do it?
You’re not imagining it. And no—it’s not laziness or defiance. It’s executive function. Whether your t(w)een is avoiding homework, melting down over small things, or just struggling to stay on track, this episode gives you the real reason why—and how to respond without losing your cool.
Inside this episode, you’ll learn:

These are the life skills that help your teen become confident, capable, and self-directed—and you can start practicing them together today.
As always, I’m here to guide you.

✨ Ashley

00:13 - What Is Executive Function & Why It Matters for Teens
01:23 - Executive Function = Being the Boss of Your Life
02:19 - Why Executive Function Starts with Emotional Regulation
03:30 - Emotional Regulation Begins with Feeling Seen, Loved & Valued
04:18 - Why Reacting to Your Teen’s Emotions Doesn’t Work
05:06 - Stop Taking Your Teen’s Behavior Personally
05:55 - How to Stay Calm During Your Teen’s Outbursts
06:25 - Executive Function Is More Than a To-Do List
07:35 - Why Overwhelm Stops Executive Function in Its Tracks
08:02 - Uncover What’s Blocking Executive Function
09:07 - Start with Curiosity, Not Criticism
10:23 - Be the Director of Your Own Mind
11:08 - Executive Function Is a Relay, Not a Race
11:57 - It’s Never Too Late to Build Executive Function Skills
13:18 - How Hidden Stress Hijacks Executive Function
14:38 - Daily Routines Start with Your Emotional Regulation
15:57 - Pain Points Reveal Where to Build Skills
16:59 - How to Talk to Your Teen About Building Executive Function
17:46 - Executive Function Is a Quality of Life Skill
18:40 - Parents Need to Build These Skills Too
19:31 - Daily Action Builds Trust, Skills, and Self-Awareness

✅ FREE Class: Confident & Connected—get your teen to listen, follow through, and strengthen your relationship! → https://www.theteenageguide.com/class
✅ 1-on-1 Parent Coaching: Waitlist! Apply Now → https://www.jotform.com/form/240688718868174
✅ The Teenage Guide, 50% OFF for just $27—help your teen navigate these last months with success! → https://www.theteenageguide.com/guides

Follow Ashley on:
Instagram → the_teenage_guide
Facebook → The Teenage Guide

Do you feel helpless when your teen is breaking down—and just want to do something to fix it fast? 

When I say 'breaking down' I'm referring to any time your tween or teen lashes out, has an emotional reaction to stress, conflict, or overwhelm, and/or takes out their stress on you.

These instances can happen a lot throughout adolescence, and it can be challenging to know what to do as the parent.

So, in this quick episode, I share what you should do first when your t(w)een breaks down.

Afterwards, the next step will be clearer, and you're one step closer to feeling better from the inside out.

Time Codes:  
[01:38] - What to Do When Your Teen Is Breaking Down
[01:49] - Why ‘What Do I Do?’ Might Be the Wrong Question
[02:13] - Start Here: How to Show Up When Your Teen Breaks Down
[02:44] - Why Your Energy Matters More Than Action
[03:18] - Be Present First—Not Reactive
[04:11] - Your Presence Says: 'I See You. I'm Here.

Listen in, subscribe, share, and enjoy! ~Ashley

Find all the details about Ashley and her work here >>

✨ (More details coming soon, so be sure to subscribe and sign up for the latest updates) ✨

Find all the details about Ashley and her work here >>

In this episode, I the role you play in 90% of your tween or teen's challenges.

This is one of my favorites, because when you really start to internalize this approach it's a game-changer in how your t(w)een responds to you, does what they need to do, and in trust-building between you.

Inside the episode I share:

Listen in, subscribe, share, and enjoy! And, never underestimate the power you have as the parent.

~Ashley

Time Codes
[01:00] - What’s Your Role When Parenting Gets Hard?
[02:32] - The Moment I Realized What I Truly Wanted for My Child
[03:45] - You Can’t Teach What You Don’t Give Yourself
[05:23] - You Are Their Guide—Whether You Realize It or Not
[06:16] - Flashback: My First Step Toward Independence
[07:52] - The Day I Refused to Wait for Help
[09:15] - Your Teen Doesn’t Want a Boss—They Want a Guide
[11:29] - Why Your Teen Rejects Your Wisdom

Find all the details about Ashley and her work here >>

✨ (More details coming soon, so be sure to subscribe and sign up for the latest updates) ✨

Just because your t(w)een is moody, distant, or suddenly obsessed with their social life… doesn’t mean they don’t need you.   But the truth is—there are 3 rarely talked about things going on beneath the surface during adolescence that most parents never hear about. And if you don’t know them, it’s easy to misread your kid’s behavior and lose your connection.   In this episode, I share 3 (rarely talked about) things you must understand about your tween or teen.

Once you understand these 3 things, daily interactions become less stressful because you're focused on what's really going on...  

Time Codes  
[01:55] - Why These 3 Things Change How You See Your Teen
[02:38] - Puberty Isn’t the Whole Story Behind Teen Mood Swings
[03:25] - Your Teen’s Brain Is Rebuilding—Just Like Ages 0–5
[04:13] - The Brain Shift Begins Around Middle School
[04:37] - Why Your Teen’s “Leader Brain” Is Under Construction
[05:14] - Mood Swings = Emotional Brain in Charge
[06:12] - Why Your Response Matters More Than Their Reaction
[06:25] - Adolescence Is a Spiritual Transformation, Too
[07:21] - Teens Need to Be Seen Beyond Likes and Labels
[08:36] - Why Teens Need a Bigger Anchor Than Themselves
[09:00] - Teens Need to Know They’re More Than What They Achieve
[10:00] - The Truth: Your Teen Still Wants to Be Close to You
[10:28] - Pulling Away Doesn’t Mean They Don’t Need You
[11:07] - You Have More Influence Than You Think
[11:31] - Why “Because I Said So” Doesn’t Work Anymore
[12:35] - Your Relationship Is Your Greatest Influence
[13:12] - Parenting for the Long Game, Not Just the Moment
[13:56] - The 3 Things Every Parent of a Teen Needs to Know
[14:46] - Take These Nuggets and Use Them With Your Teen
[15:00] - You Were Made for Each Other—Don’t Forget It

🎧 Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and share with a fellow parent

✨ Ashley

✅ FREE Class: Confident & Connected—get your teen to listen, follow through, and strengthen your relationship! → https://www.theteenageguide.com/class
✅ 1-on-1 Parent Coaching: Waitlist! Apply Now → https://www.jotform.com/form/240688718868174
✅ Teenage Guide to Finish School Strong: 50% OFF for just $27—help your teen navigate these last months with success! → https://www.theteenageguide.com/offers/xTz2nPfY

Follow Ashley on:
Instagram → the_teenage_guide
Facebook → The Teenage Guide

Ever stopped to ask yourself: What did my 12-year-old self need to hear? That one question changed everything for me. In this episode, I share a deeply personal story from an Oprah Live Your Best Life event that led to a major breakthrough—not just in my own healing but in the way I help parents and teens today.

If you've ever felt disconnected from your teen (or even from yourself), this episode is for you.

We'll talk about:
✅ How childhood and adolescent experiences shape our parenting today
✅ Why emotional safety is the foundation of success for teens
✅ The ONE question that can unlock healing for you and your child

I hope you enjoy this episode - Listen in now! 

Time Codes

[01:20] - Breaking the Cycle: Transforming Your Relationship with Your Teen
[02:19] - Parenting Teens Can Be Joyful—Here’s How
[04:06] - The Oprah Experience: A Life-Changing Perspective on Parenting
[06:08] - What Your Inner Child Needed to Hear
[07:53] - Finding Control Through Achievement
[08:49] - Healing Perfectionism and Letting Go of Control
[09:26] - What My 12-Year-Old Self Needed to Hear
[10:45] - Seeing My Life Through a 12-Year-Old’s Eyes
[14:06] - The Moment Everything Made Sense
[15:37] - Why Emotional Safety Changes Everything
[16:51] - From Party Girl to Teenage Guide
[17:46] - Becoming the Guide You Once Needed

Find all the details about Ashley and her work here >>

✨ (More details coming soon, so be sure to subscribe and sign up for the latest updates) ✨

Welcome to The Teenage Guide podcast! Each week, Educator and Coach, Ashley Chandler, guides parents, tweens, and teens through the essential soul-to-systems toolkit needed to thrive individually, together, at school, and in life. Launching Aug. 5th, 2024!