LOST! A hatch! A guacamole peyote vision of death! A toy plane! TOO MUCH DRAMA!

0:00:00 -- Hotel Hell would apparently better be titled Gordon Ramsay: After Dark. (And hey, a cameo from J.'s wife, Christy.)

0:01:44 -- Open. Who didn't have a GeoCities account?

0:09:06 -- "All the Best Cowboys Have Daddy Issues." Great title. Good episode. And we learn the best way to bring someone back from the dead, and the worst way to start a fistfight.

0:32:06 -- "Whatever the Case May Be." Terrible title. Decent episode. One of the first really clear examples of a character on this show being incredibly secretive for no particular reason.

0:55:26 -- "Hearts and Minds." Locke becomes the writers' surrogate, and constructs Boone's first episode. Always looking out, that Locke.

1:16:26 -- Next on Lost: "Special," "Homecoming" and "Outlaws." One of these is J.'s least favorite episode of the entire series. So, yeah, I guess.

1:21:14 -- Next week: Voyager. FINALLY.

1:22:59 -- Close. You can read our various things at the various places.

1:33:50 -- Tag!

Links:

Robby's Glee reviews

The Cold Open

J.'s column at This Was Television

See you next week. Tell your friends about this show.

Before we were so rudely interrupted...

0:00:00 - "Beyond the Sea." It's J.'s favorite "normal" episode, and, well, also Robby's, I guess. It smartly focuses on Scully and a great guest villain, who is both well-played and well-written.

0:16:09 - The X-Files "formula," and the problems with it.

0:19:33 - Oh, we're not giving up on The X-Files. Not completely.

0:24:44 - Preview for next week: LOST!

0:28:12 - And a preview for the week after that. It's gonna be a good one...

0:30:16 - Close. Our hopes are not exactly high for Elementary.

Next week: it's LOST! We'll be watching "All the Best Cowboys Have Daddy Issues," "Whatever the Case May Be" and "Hearts and Minds." See you then.

(There were server issues that prevented this from going up Wednesday. A thousand apologies.)

Well, folks: here it is. The end of the road for Agents Mulder and Scully. Robby has finally had enough, and we are ending our episode-to-episode examination of The X-Files. Join us in picking through the leavings with our first ever TWO-PARTER!

0:00:00 - Teaser. Does J. sound sad and defeated? Yes. Yes, he does.

0:01:01 - Top of the show.

0:05:24 - "Fallen Angel." A very interesting guest character can't save a bland, lifeless script. Oh, and fourth-, fifth- and sixth-degree burns are a real thing, apparently.

0:33:31 - Interlude: Where did Mulder and Scully get their names? J. know. Also, commentary tracks don't work on VHS. They do on CDs, though.

0:36:05 - "Eve." How far ahead should the audience be allowed to be of the characters? When the viewer knows more than the protagonists, is it suspenseful, or boring?

0:50:59 - "Fire." Remember how J. suggested skipping this episode, because it was bad and there wasn't much to talk about? Yeah, scratch that last part.

1:19:13 - TO BE CONTINUED....In part two, we discuss "Beyond the Sea," J.'s choice for the best "normal" (?) episode of The X-Files, as well as plan ahead for our future Mulder and Scully adventures. Look for that later tonight or tomorrow.

It's Deep Space Nine this week, as we watched "The Nagus," "Vortex" and "Battle Lines." And we aren't that happy about it.

0:00:00 - Teaser. Hotel Hell is the Super Mario Bros. 2 of the Gordon Ramsey Yells at People franchise. (You're gonna have to parse that reference on your own.)

0:01:34 - Top of the show.

0:04:30 - "The Nagus." Seriously, you guys, the Ferengi ARE NOT FUNNY. Neither are obvious, lazy pop culture references.

0:27:04 - "Vortex." A script in desperate need of a rewrite and an overhaul -- it's an episode with a fractured narrative spine. And, really, Odo is just the worst security chief ever.

0:44:50 - "Battle Lines." Hey, Kai Opaka is back! And hey, she's never coming back after this! There are two very different, potentially very good episodes trapped in here, and we're not sure which we'd rather see. We do know that combining them sure as hell didn't work.

1:07:17 - MasterChef. Robby is not happy with the direction the show has wandered the last few episodes...that being in the direction of Hell's Kitchen. But it does lead Robby to exploring...

1:11:21 - Chopped, a show that features Robby's favorite element from MasterChef. Only much crazier and more hectic.

1:16:52 - The TV Challenge prompts continue, as this week we discuss our favorite guilty pleasure shows. Robby's you've almost certainly heard of; J.'s you probably haven't. Both shows are terrible; both shows are glorious.

1:41:35. Closing ceremonies. Seriously: leave some comments. We love feedback. And tell your friends about this show.

Next week: The X-Files. Come and join the party with "Fallen Angel," "Eve," "Fire" and "Beyond the Sea." Two of those are really good. YES FOR REALS THIS TIME

We go back to the island this week, as the Crazy Wacko Mythology(TM) starts to pick up with "Confidence Man," "Solitary" and "Raised by Another."

0:00:00 - J. really did go to school to learn how to edit and produce this podcast. He was a dork already.

0:00:46 - New theme music! What do you think?

0:01:25 - Top of the show. Voyager comes up. Because of course it does.

0:04:42 - "Confidence Man." Does the heavy-handed ending hurt the episode?

0:26:32 - "Solitary." Does anyone not think Hurley is awesome?

0:56:34 - "Raised by Another." Locke: creepy. Australian psychic: creepier. Ethan: creepiest.

1:21:50 - Our favorite title sequences.

1:33:35 - Closing ceremonies. Hello, German listener!

Supplemental materials:

Robby's Lost WTF list

Robby's favorite title sequence

J.'s favorite title sequence

Next week: we go back to DS9, with "The Nagus," "Vortex" and "Battle Lines." See you then!

Oh, god.

It's back to The X-Files this week, and Robby is tapping out. J. keeps promising the good episodes arrive -- seriously, they do -- but the left-right combination this week might be too much to stand. The second episode, "Ice," isn't too bad (J. actually really likes it; Robby less so), but the first and third are dreadful. "Ghost in the Machine" is a spooky (?) Halloween tale of the dumbest supercomputer of all time, which is summed up by both hosts in one word: "stupid." But it ain't got nothin' on the third episode, "Space," by far the worst episode of the season, and maybe ever. Robby and J. have quite a time trying to figure out just what exactly was going on here, and who exactly thought the villain being a ghost from space (but not Space Ghost) was a good idea.

Speaking of bad ideas, NBC has been airing the Olympics non-stop for, oh, feels like about six months now. J. has been less than thrilled with the coverage. Afterwards, a series of recent local political ads leads to a discussion about misleading and false advertising in general, and how lucky Robby is to not have to watch political ads, ever, because he watches all of his television on Hulu. (Bastard!)

Next week, we wash the taste of "Space" out with some crisp, cool LOST! It's "Confidence Man," "Solitary," and "Raised by Another." Make sure to follow along with us (the show is available on every TV streaming service we know about), and tell all your friends about this show. See you next week!

It's back to Deep Space Nine this week, and some shocking happens: J. and Robby disagree! I mean, for reals disagree. They watched "Dax," "The Passenger" and "Move Along Home," and while they see eye-to-eye on two of them, one finds them taking opposite sides. (Hint: it might be the one this episode is named for. SPOILER, I guess.)

After that, Robby finally let curiosity get the best of him, and he tuned into The Choice. Is it as bad as he hoped/feared? The talk of The Choice leads to other dating show related topics, particularly The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. Those shows are utterly ridiculous, and yet take themselves so very seriously -- why? J. can't figure it out.

The conversation then drifts over to Breaking Bad, which J. is currently obsessed with. It also gives him another chance to complain about the twilight years of The X-Files. (Hey, at least it wasn't Voyager this week.)

We hope you're watching along with us on these retro shows. If you are, make sure you catch up on The X-Files for next week: we're watching "Ghost in the Machine," "Ice," and "Space."

See you next time. And please, tell your friends about this show.

It's back to The X-Files this week, and the guys aren't dealt the best of hands: it's "Conduit," "The Jersey Devil" and "Shadows," and Robby is eyeing the exits. J. swears the show gets better -- seriously, it does -- but in the meantime, the discussion is built on how these episodes commit the worst sin a television show can: they're boring. Also, why does Mulder always have to be right? I mean, always? Robby posits the laws of physics themselves bend to Mulder's will, and "Conduit" suggests he might be right.

Then, J. has become fixated on a Food Network show called Mystery Diners, and he's not entirely sure why. Is it bad? Is it good? Is it possibly both at once?

Also, somewhere in there they somehow manage to talk about Battlestar Galactica. Don't ask me how.

Next week: LOST! The three episodes in question will be "White Rabbit," "House of the Rising Sun" and "The Moth," so fire up your Netflix and get ready.

Hey: ten episodes! This is kind of a serious thing we've got going here! Not serious, however, are this week's episodes of our retro series, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. It starts with the good-but-problematic "Babel," but "Captive Pursuit" then leads directly into "Q-Less," the first real speed bump of DS9's first season. We talk about the good, the bad and the ugly...especially "Q-Less," which is ugly. (Something we didn't get to on the show: what the hell does that title even mean?)

Then, Robby hasn't talked about Glee in a while -- seriously, it's been like three episodes -- so he brings it up here in the context of a discussion about stakes. As in, is it the responsibility of a show's writer to make the events matter to the viewer, or is character motivation enough? Oddly, J. and Robby seem to agree on this topic, but the terminology leads to an interesting discussion.

It also leads, somewhat indirectly, to Louie, one of J.'s favorite shows currently on the air. So, of course, he spends this time explaining why Robby would absolutely hate it.

Next week, it's back to The X-Files. If you're following along at home, we're watching "Conduit," "The Jersey Devil" and "Shadows." See you then!