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When it comes to our health, it is easy to look for the “one trick” to bring a beach-ready body, but there isn’t a trick. There isn’t some “magic formula” that fixes our health and keeps us in shape. It always comes down to the little daily decisions in our life.
The idea for this series came from a quote that Dr. Layne Norton put on X:
"STOP stressing over every single health topic. The majority of ‘optimal’ health can be achieved through
Implementing these priorities is the key to having a beach-ready body year-round. Plus they aren’t weird or super complicated. On today’s show, we are covering the first of two parts about Movement and its importance in our lives
Beach-Ready vs SedentaryRESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN
Thriving Man Coaching Resources
4D MODEL FREE PDF
Discover OUR SPEAKING AND HOW WE HAVE EMPOWERED THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE ACROSS THE WORLD
Is there an ideal body type? Body types and ideal body types are always changing. Standards of beauty vary from time period to time period. We even see that today. Different countries will often have different standards of beauty and looks.
The problem with these types of standards is that for many of us, they aren’t possible so we don’t even try. What is the use of being in shape if we will never reach a “standard” of perfection? We have to change our minds when it comes to this and it starts with us having the right attitude.
We are using the term “Beach Ready Body” and we want to explain what that means on today’s show.
A beach-ready body isn’t an ideal of perfection, as much as it is an individual goal for a person. It is a term we are using to focus on being healthy all the time and not just going on vacation when people will see us at the beach. We want to focus on living a lifestyle of healthiness which means at any time we could go to the beach. Our health should not be about an event but about a lifestyle journey.
Health Journey vs Health TargetOur challenge is to start with a series of questions about where you are at and where you want to go.
These questions should help you figure out where your mind is at and what changes you will need to make to start your healthy journey.
RESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN
========================
Thriving Man Coaching Resources
4D MODEL FREE PDF
Discover OUR SPEAKING AND HOW WE HAVE EMPOWERED THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE ACROSS THE WORLD
Life often never goes as we planned. Many of us had dreams as kids of what we wanted to be when we grew up. Most of us change those many times before we become adults. No one’s life goes according to their first initial plan.
Why is this? Because we all make adjustments as we grow. We learn about ourselves and we mature in our values. Adjusting to life is part of living life well. We adjust to things like jobs and relationships. Having confidence doesn’t mean we get everything right. It means we have an attitude of adjustment.
On today’s show, we talk through 3 key ways to ensure adjusting is part of building a confident life.
Pick a Direction
- You can’t adjust your direction if you have no direction.
- Why are you here? What does a great life look like in a normal week?
- A lot of guys never answer that question.
- Survival mode is the path of least resistance.
- You can only behave beyond your current standard when you look beyond your current reality.
- Picking a direction is part of living a confident life
- When you don’t pick a direction, you’ll wander from fad to fad.
- Not choosing is a choice. When you don’t pick your direction it is picked for you (listening to music, watching streaming vs TV channels)
- When we don’t pick, we are giving control of our lives to others
- Key Idea: Choices aren’t permanent- they’re tests for feedback
Set Up Boundaries
- Gardens flourish within the right conditions, grass looks lush and green when taken care of
- Too often we don’t work on the boundaries of our lives so we can’t flourish
- Boundaries Focus our Work and Energy
- Boundaries Make Decisions Easier
- It is deciding before you have to make the decision.
- Boundaries Protect Us, even from ourselves
- The simplicity of the concept of boundaries doesn’t mean they are easy
Make Micro Adjustments
- Making adjustments is a good part of living our lives
- Flights adjust constantly as they travel to get to their destination
- We do the same thing as we figure out what works in our life
- We prototype things and then drop it or adjust it
- Don’t always adjust everything- have a planning, executing, and evaluating rhythm.
- These are all micro adjustments and they are a part of life
- You won’t be perfect and shouldn’t expect to be, but if you don’t try you won’t know
CHALLENGE
- Quit waiting for Perfection to pick a direction
- What are the core 4 to 5 things you value most in life?
- What doesn’t a lifestyle that supports those things look like on an average day?
- What does the schedule look like in an average week?
- Where do you live and who are you with?
- Boundaries
- What boundaries do you need to start living that way today?
- Read Boundaries by Henry Cloud & John Townsend
- Go to www.boundaries.me
- Embrace adjustments and look for ways to improve
- Make a plan/prototype.
- Set a start and end date.
- At the end date ask yourself:
- What worked well?
- What made it difficult?
- What did I learn about myself in the process?
- How can I adjust to fit the future I desire? (could even mean stopping something)
- Understand that change isn’t always better
- You don’t have to constantly be changing everything
- Sometimes maintaining what you’re doing is best.
- Be wise in your adjustments. Be selective. Only work on 1-3 areas at a time. NO MORE THAN 3. Preferably 2 or less.
- Sometimes the best adjustment is to stick to the original plan and focus on it
Watch and Enjoy!
David & Reese Maxwell
RESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN
========================
Thriving Man Resources
4D MODEL FREE PDF
Being the main character of your own life and building confidence only happens when you have focus. Our focus on the why behind our lives really does matter. Too often we are so busy living life that we never think about why.
We call this survivor mode. A way of life for too many of us
We have to start living with purpose in the face of the busyness of life
Busyness is a distraction and deception for too many of us
We want to escape the survivor mode by focusing our lives and we do that by recognizing some key mental traps that we can get caught up in
Trap #1: Activity = Success
- Everyone is busy today
- Busyness isn’t evil
- Busyness isn’t evil, but busyness isn’t necessarily success either
- The problem comes when we allow ourselves to take on the activity = success mindset
Trap #2: Riding vs Driving
- The reality of the “Victim Mentality” and how it has permeated our society today
- Question “Is life moving you are, or are you moving you”
- Many of us act like we are on a roller coaster instead of driving a car
- **Decide Your Destination**
- **Evaluate Your Every Day**
- The calendar is the greatest mirror of what your priorities really are
- “Desires without discipline will only be dreams”
- Use the Word No
- We have to learn to say no to ourselves first
- Men who can’t control their own appetites can’t control their life
- We have to learn to say no to others
- We have to say no to the urgent and unimportant
- This is simple but not easy
Trap #3: The “One Day” Dream
- Our society pushes and showcases the “one-day” dream
- One day will never happen if we aren’t ready for it
- The lottery mentality - dreaming of how you’ll spend the millions but not doing anything to earn money now
- Are you a good steward of what you have now?
CHALLENGE
- Ask yourself, “Why am I so busy”
- Am I choosing what I do or allowing it to be selected for me?
- Do this in the reality of your life.
- Write out everything you are committed to, and how much time that takes each week, and look at that list. Are you setting yourself up for stress and overcommitment?
- You can’t control everything but what CAN you control
- Start with the little daily decisions
- Are you choosing how you live or just surviving in the little things of everyday life?
- The “one-day” mentality comes from feeling overwhelmed with all the stuff life throws at us
- Do you need all the decisions you have to make?
- Start fixing the small areas and you will build up strength for the big areas
Watch and Enjoy!
David & Reese Maxwell
RESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN
========================
Thriving Man Coaching Resources
4D MODEL FREE PDF
“Action is the currency of a life well lived.”
This truth shows up in our lives every day. We must take action in our lives and not just wish things would change. Without action, there won’t be change and many aspects of life wouldn’t happen. We all must take action if we want to live our lives well.
We are talking on today’s show about building confidence and being the main character of our own lives. To do this, we must make choices and then take action. Choices always precede action and action must follow our choices or we won’t do anything.
This means we must walk in the confidence of making decisions. We can’t live a main character's life if we aren’t willing to make the main character's decisions.
1. A Confident Person Removes the Unnecessary Obstacles
- What are some unnecessary obstacles standing between us and a life of confidence?
- Worry
- The Trivial
- Savior Complex/Perfectionism
- Interesting Distractions
2. A Confident Person Embraces the Important Obstacles
- Choose: Pick the key area you need to grow in the most
- Your growth in one area gives you the strength and belief to tackle other areas
- Move: Be patient, keep moving
- Endure: Expect failures. Don’t take it personally
- Ask: Get coaching and help
CHALLENGE
Courage Starts Now
- Growth is inside out and on the way. It's on the path, not at the end of the path so start moving in a direction
- Avoid Analysis paralysis= walking in mental circles
- Don’t Use Thinking and Planning to Stall Progress
Watch and Enjoy!
David & Reese Maxwell
RESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN
========================
Thriving Man Coaching Resources
4D MODEL FREE PDF
FIND OUT ABOUT OUR SPEAKING
Building Your Confidence: Being the Main Character of Your Own Life: Confident People Are Self-Aware
We’ve all had those moments where reality slapped us in the face. Mine was an anniversary picture where I looked like I needed a man bra. It was not a pretty site and it woke me up to reality. My self-awareness had woken up.
We all need to have a healthy dose of self-awareness to grow in our confidence. Being the main character of our lives means taking full responsibility for ourselves and our actions. Without self-awareness, we can't take responsibility and we will always lack true confidence. We will only play pretend based on our faulty logic.
Self-awareness is a big key to confidence and we will look at what it means for us in how we think.
You Don’t Have to Know Everything to Be Confident
- When you study some of the CEOs who are the most successful, you often find they have a strong sense of what they are good at and what they aren’t
- They are willing to say “I don’t know” and let experts do their job
- We often get caught up in ourselves and think we have to be able to have all the answers.
- We all have areas we love and excel in and areas we don’t.
You Don’t Have to Excel at Everything to be Confident
- We all have strengths, and we all have weaknesses
1. Recognize your strengths
2. Acknowledge your weaknesses
You Don’t Have to be Perfect to Be Confident
- There is tremendous pressure for guys to be self-sufficient. To be the full package.
- We can’t do it all. We can’t be it all. outside of Jesus, NO ONE IS THE FULL PACKAGE.
- We don’t have unlimited supplies of energy and stamina
- Resting and relaxing can be something we recharge with and not just run away to
- Productivity is not the purpose of life
CHALLENGE: Self Awareness Comes from Learning, Reflection, and Trustworthy Opinions
Learning
- Objective tools to help you build categories for strengths and weaknesses. (No one tool is perfect, but many are useful.)
- Strengthfinders assessment
- Working Genius Assessments
Reflecting
- Work + Love
- What are you good at and enjoy?
- What are you good at but don’t like it?
Trustworthy Opinions
- Find people you trust to ask them their thoughts
- What do you think I am good at?
- Where are some areas in which I don’t excel?
Watch and Enjoy!
David & Reese Maxwell
RESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN
========================
Thriving Man Coaching Resources:
https://www.thrivingman.com/coaching
4D MODEL FREE PDF
Learn about the 4 fundamentals of a Successful Life
https://www.thrivingman.com/the-4d-model
DISCOVER OUR SPEAKING AND HOW WE HAVE EMPOWERED THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE ACROSS THE WORLD
https://www.thrivingman.com/speaking
Welcome to another episode of Manime Month where we learn manly lessons from Anime! We have loved doing these shows and if you enjoy them, let us know what shows you’d like us to use for future Manime months!
Today on the show we look at the realities of compassion and how Naofumi showed compassion to people even when his feelings weren’t always there
As men, we may not always feel things but we are good at getting things done. This is why we are great at showing compassion, but not always sympathy. Naofumi is a classic example of a man who shows incredible compassion even if he doesn’t show a lot of sympathy.
Compassion Gives Attention & Action
- Naofumi showed real compassion with Raphtalia
- Compassion Pays Attention
- Marcus Buckingham “Attention is the food of love” and “The opposite of love is not hate but ignoring”
- Compassion isn’t a formula it is an extremely personal way of relating
- Naofumi did pay attention, but he followed it up with action
Compassion Gives Significance
- Naofumi treated people with significance, even when he questioned himself about it
- What we do when we are paying attention is recognize a person’s humanity and it develops and recognizes our humanity
- For many guys, the path to freedom or the best life isn’t what they will receive from others but what they give.
- Learning how to give and serve can help set us free from our struggles
- The villagers that Naofumi protected are inspired by his example and they fight with him
CHALLENGE:
- Start working on paying attention
- Look for opportunities to take action and give compassion to others
- Five Love Languages
- It starts with us paying attention, and taking action, and then significance and life change happens to the people you help and yourself
Watch and Enjoy!
David & Reese Maxwell
RESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN
========================
Thriving Man Coaching Resources
4D MODEL FREE PDF
Discover OUR SPEAKING AND HOW WE HAVE EMPOWERED THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE ACROSS THE WORLD
Rage is something we love in movies. When the main character goes into beast mode and takes all the bad guys down. We think of guys like John Wick who take out entire gangs for killing his dog. In “Rising of the Shield Hero,” Naofumi has the “Rage Shield.” This is a special power that he possesses that helps him win a bunch of fights. However, it does have a very high cost.
For many men, rage is a common characteristic. They lose their temper and go at people or situations. For many, when they get angry and full of rage, they get things done and make things happen. At least, that is what they tell themselves. The problem is rage always has a lot of collateral damage.
On today’s episode, we talk about the realities of rage. What it can do for us and what it can do to hurt us. We also talk about the positive flip side of rage: discipline.
Truth 1: Rage can be effective.
- When the adrenaline hits and rage takes over, you can do some damage.
- Rage can motivate hard work for a time
- Becoming raged can intimidate people into submission
Truth 2: Rage has a high price
- It only has the power to destroy
- No one gets enraged and then makes a beautiful painting or builds a grand structure.
- Rage has collateral damage
- Our rage hurts those closest to us
- Naofumi hurt himself when he was full of rage
- Rage can be a powerful force but it has a high cost.
Truth 3: Discipline Focuses the Energy of Rage
- Discipline comes from our self-control
- Our ability to focus our energy and use it for good instead of bad
- Discipline is found in community and not isolation
- Discipline is a productive power source
Challenge:
- How do we move from rage to discipline
- Deal with the roots of our pain
- Build a community and don’t fight alone
- Do the right thing even when you don’t feel like it
- Protect yourself from influences and situations that feed your rage
Watch and Enjoy!
David & Reese Maxwell
RESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN
========================
Thriving Man Coaching Resources:
https://www.thrivingman.com/coaching
4D MODEL FREE PDF
Learn about the 4 fundamentals of a Successful Life
https://www.thrivingman.com/the-4d-model
FIND OUT ABOUT OUR SPEAKING AND HOW WE HAVE EMPOWERED THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE ACROSS THE WORLD
https://www.thrivingman.com/speaking
Anime is one of the best genres when it comes to a backstory. They can change how you feel about one of the villains after a backstory. How a character chooses to live after their backstory is what often makes them the villain or the protagonist.
Naofumi had a bad backstory in Rising of the Shield Hero, but how he dealt with it is what helped him become a true hero.
Many of us have hurts and pains from our past. How we deal with them is the key to overcoming and being a hero in our own story.
On today’s show, we deal with the realities of bitterness and how to overcome it so we can become the hero in our own story.
Reduces Your World
- Constantly replaying what happened in the past will reduce our world today
- Bitterness can motivate us to “show them,” which means we are still working for them in a weird way
- Naofumi was consumed with the hurt and it often kept him from doing as much as he could
- Bitter Men are constantly replaying their pain and hurting their life today
Distorts Your Relationships
- Your past hurts define your present relationships if you don’t deal with them
- Pain can isolate us - “I’m the only one….”
- Because of his hurt, Naofumi lived with a “guilty until proven innocent mentality.”
- Bitterness can put us in a place where reconciliation and healing are impossible.
- Victim mentality blinds us to compassion.
Disfigures Your Identity
- Since the beginning of the show, Naofumi was a pretty good guy. Not perfect- but he mentioned that he helped his sister get on the right path and that was why his parents let him live at home.
- But when he got to the new world, Everyone said he was a bad guy. Everyone. and he started filling that role.
- “I’m not that good of a guy,” is something he starts thinking of himself.
- If we stay in our bitterness, it transforms our view of ourselves and everything is seen through the lens of our pain
Challenge
- Don’t fight alone! Too many men try to fight through their past pain by themselves
- Find friends or others who you can be honest with and can help you overcome your past pain
- For Naofumi, not having a sword became a blessing
- “Sometimes your greatest limitations become your greatest blessings”
- Naofumi’s team, helped him overcome his own inner pain
- Heroes overcome their backstory
- Villains stay in their backstory
Watch and Enjoy!
David & Reese Maxwell
RESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN
========================
Thriving Man Coaching Resources:
https://www.thrivingman.com/coaching
4D MODEL FREE PDF
Learn about the 4 fundamentals of a Successful Life
https://www.thrivingman.com/the-4d-model
FIND OUT ABOUT OUR SPEAKING AND HOW WE HAVE EMPOWERED THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE ACROSS THE WORLD
https://www.thrivingman.com/speaking
This week we start a series that we are super excited about. We are combining two passions of ours: Anime and Thriving Men! Welcome to MANIME!
The power of stories has been a constant throughout history and today some of the most powerful storytelling is through the Anime genre. We wanted to choose an anime that we felt had many lessons in it for us as men so we chose the show, “Rising of the Shield Hero.”
We will discuss many things the protagonist, Iwatani Naofumi, goes through in season one. If you haven’t seen the show, we would love for you to check it out before listening to the podcast, but you don’t have to watch it to understand the lessons that we can learn through the shows.
This week’s show talks about Toughness vs Roughness. This is relevant to us because we all go through hard times in our lives. Sometimes it is because of things we have done and sometimes it is because of things that were done to us. Either way, these things can cause us to be tough or rough. Toughness is a necessary trait for us as men and it helps us succeed. Roughness can cause us to isolate ourselves and hurt relationships in our lives. As men, we want to be tough but not rough. We discuss what that looks like and why in this week’s episode.
Hard Times Hit Us All
- Naofumi had it rough because he was betrayed hard! He was accused of something he didn’t do, but everyone believed that he was guilty.
- We see him struggle with this betrayal and the pain it causes him all through the first season
- It causes him to grow in toughness- which isn’t a bad thing. We see him get creative and the situation ends up leading to a lot of good.
- We also see him struggle with his rage. His betrayal from the past colored all of his relationships- even with the people who were trying to help him.
- Bitterness does that to all of us as men.
- The issue is: that we can’t see it as “our lonely burden” and isolate ourselves from everyone! Don’t forget: all men go through hard times. Everyone suffers.
- If we aren’t careful, the pain and bitterness will cause us to reject everything and everyone
- Naofumi projects this aura of being a grumpy man who doesn’t care, but those closest to him see it isn’t true cause he still treats people well.
We Can’t Let The Past Define Our Future
- One of the best lessons we can learn from Naofumi is to not let the past determine our future
- We see him not dwelling too much on the past but looking at what he can do right now
- He decides to get help and becomes financially independent
- He begins to make alliances and build his network of people to work with
- This is his toughness being developed, which he needs.
- We also see him moving on and not allowing the “reputation” he has to define him
- We see him sometimes doing the right thing and then sometimes acting like a hurt child. This is normal and is part of the process of working through the grief of a painful past
- Naofumi shows us that struggle in different aspects
Difficulties Develop Us
- Difficulty when creatively embraced builds different muscles in us
- We see in Naofumi that the difficulties he went through grew him and made him stronger
- The other heroes don’t ever grow in their development
- We see that in society today among a lot of young men who aren’t growing up because they have never gone through any difficulties in their life
- Ease can make us whither - too much comfort and not doing hard things can make us weak
- Hard things build up our mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical selves.
CHALLENGE:
- Ask yourself the question: “How do I treat people?”
- Do you see everyone as your enemy? = This is a symptom of roughness
- Where are you focusing your mind?
- Do you replay old problems and pains or are you looking for solutions to your current issues?
Watch and Enjoy!
David & Reese Maxwell
RESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN
========================
Thriving Man Coaching Resources:
https://www.thrivingman.com/coaching
4D MODEL FREE PDF
Learn about the 4 fundamentals of a Successful Life
https://www.thrivingman.com/the-4d-model
FIND OUT ABOUT OUR SPEAKING AND HOW WE HAVE EMPOWERED THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE ACROSS THE WORLD
https://www.thrivingman.com/speaking
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