The Uncommon Communicator

Giving and receiving feedback is a truly a skill. The results on both ends of the exchange will brings growth, breathes life and trust into the relationship. 

Today we will look at:

·      Giving effective feedback

·      Receiving feedback 

Top 4 ways to give feedback

1.     Be specific: When giving feedback, make sure it is clear, concise, and specific to the situation. Avoid vague or general statements and instead focus on specific actions or behaviors that need improvement.

2.     Focus on the behavior, not the person: Feedback should focus on actions or behaviors rather than personal characteristics. It is important to avoid making negative comments about the individual and instead focus on what can be improved.

3.     Be timely: Feedback is most effective when it is given in a timely manner, as close as possible to the event being evaluated. Delaying feedback may lead to confusion or the loss of important information.

4.     Use a balanced approach: Feedback should be balanced, combining positive reinforcement with constructive criticism. This helps the recipient feel encouraged and motivated while also addressing areas for improvement. Emphasize the positive and offer suggestions for how to improve in the future. The sandwich method isn’t always the best. Start with the constructive criticism and end it on a positive. Otherwise the listener will be expecting the bad news after the fluffy fake positive that you started with. 

Best situations to provide constructive feedback:

1.     Performance reviews

2.     One-on-one meetings

3.     After a specific project or task

Worst situations to provide constructive feedback:

1.     In front of others

2.     When emotions are high

3.     In a crisis situation:  

How to receive feedback :

1.     Be open-minded: Approach feedback with an open mind and a willingness to learn and grow. Avoid getting defensive or taking feedback personally. Instead, focus on the message being conveyed and how you can use it to improve.

2.     Set aside personal emotions: It can be helpful to take a step back and detach yourself from the situation emotionally. This allows you to better understand and process the feedback without getting caught up in feelings of anger, frustration, or disappointment.

3.     Ask questions: If you don't understand the feedback, don't be afraid to ask questions for clarification. This can help you gain a deeper understanding of the feedback and ensure that you are interpreting it correctly.

4.     Be self-reflective: Before receiving feedback, take some time to reflect on your own performance and areas for improvement. This can help you be more receptive to the feedback and can provide a starting point for future growth and development.

5.     Show gratitude: Acknowledge the person providing the feedback and express gratitude for their time and effort. This can help maintain a positive relationship and can encourage future feedback in the future.

The UC Moment : Start with trust, trust the feedback 

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Giving good directions requires you to:

·      Understand the listener. 

·      Be skilled at giving directions 

Why do some have an issue with following directions?

1.     Limited reading or comprehension skills: Some individuals may struggle with understanding written instructions, due to a lack of literacy skills or difficulty with the language being used.

2.     Cognitive or learning disabilities: Some individuals may have difficulty processing information, following sequences of steps, or retaining information, due to conditions such as ADHD, dyslexia, or traumatic brain injury.

3.     Limited prior knowledge or experience: Some individuals may have difficulty understanding instructions for tasks that are new or unfamiliar to them, as they may not have the necessary background knowledge or experience.

4.     Difficulty with abstract concepts: Some individuals may have difficulty understanding instructions that involve abstract concepts or ideas.

5.     Lack of attention or focus: Some individuals may have difficulty understanding instructions due to distractions or other competing demands on their attention, they may not be fully listening or paying attention to the instructions.

It's important to note that everyone has different abilities, experiences, and learning styles that may affect their ability to understand instructions. Being aware of these differences, providing clear, concise and simple instructions and providing additional resources or explanations when needed can help to ensure that the instructions are understood and followed.

What are some skills we could use to better give directions?

1.     Be clear and concise: Use direct and simple language when giving instructions and avoid using unnecessary or confusing words or phrases.

2.     Use visual aids: Use diagrams, images, or other visual aids to supplement the instructions, as this can help to make the information more easily understood.

3.     Provide examples: Give real-life examples or scenarios to help illustrate the instructions and make them more relatable to the listener.

4.     Encourage active engagement: Ask questions and encourage the listener to ask questions to ensure that they understand the instructions and to check for understanding.

5.     Break it down: Break the instructions down into smaller, manageable steps. This makes it easier for the listener to understand and follow the instructions, and can help to avoid confusion and mistakes.

It's important to note that the best way to give directions or instructions will vary depending on the situation, the audience and the task at hand. These five methods are generally effective but adapting to the context and being aware of the listener's needs and abilities is always recommended to make sure the instructions are understood and followed.

The UC Moment: Adapt to the context and be aware of the listeners needs and abilities.

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The problem isn’t always the instructions’ fault:

·      Why do some people have difficulty following directions?

·      What are some tools to help us be better at following directions?

1.     Limited reading or comprehension skills: Some individuals may struggle with understanding written instructions, due to a lack of literacy skills or difficulty with the language being used.

2.     Cognitive or learning disabilities: Some individuals may have difficulty processing information, following sequences of steps, or retaining information, due to conditions such as ADHD, dyslexia, or traumatic brain injury.

3.     Lack of focus or attention: Some individuals may have difficulty following instructions due to distractions or other competing demands on their attention.

4.     Limited prior knowledge or experience: Some individuals may have difficulty following instructions for tasks that are new or unfamiliar to them, as they may not have the necessary background knowledge or experience to understand the instructions.

5.     Difficulty with abstract concepts: Some individuals may have difficulty understanding instructions that involve abstract concepts or ideas.

6.     Stress or anxiety: Some individuals may have difficulty following instructions due to stress or anxiety, which can make it harder to concentrate and process information.

7.     Lack of motivation: Some individuals may not be motivated to follow instructions if they do not see the relevance or value of the task.

It's important to understand that people have different learning styles, abilities and experiences that may affect their ability to follow instructions and that it's important to be sensitive to the unique needs of each person.

How can we Improve?

When reading complex instructions, the best way to start is by doing the following:

1.     Preview the instructions: Before reading the instructions in detail, take a quick scan of the document to get an overall understanding of its structure and content. Look for headings, subheadings, and highlighted information.

2.     Identify the main goal: Understand what you are trying to accomplish by reading the instructions. Make sure you have a clear understanding of what is expected of you.

3.     Read actively: Pay attention to important details, and actively engage with the text by asking questions and making connections.

4.     Take notes: Jot down key points, important details, and any questions that come to mind. This will help you stay organized and focused.

5.     Break it down: Break the instructions down into smaller, manageable chunks. This will help you to focus on one step at a time and will make it easier to understand.

6.     Don't be afraid to ask for help: If you are unsure about something, don't hesitate to ask for clarification from the person who provided the instructions or from an expert in the field.

7.     Check for understanding: Before proceeding to the next step, make sure you understand what you're supposed to do and why. This will help you to avoid confusion and mistakes later on.

It's important to keep in mind that taking the time to read and understand complex instructions before starting a task will save you time and effort in the long run.

 The UC Moment : Check you ego at the garage door . Scan all of the instructions before starting, break it down into manageable chunks 

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Decision makers are executive level stakeholders within a company that are responsible for making decisions and managing resources within their scope. 

There are so many ways on the internet to get to the decision maker 

Here is or summation of some best practices and what to look for in the individual you are chatting with

We are really looking at 3 levels 

1.    The gatekeeper 

2.    The idea person or lackey doing research 

3.    The decision maker 

The gatekeeper:

A gatekeeper is a person who controls or regulates access to a decision maker or other key individual. They act as a barrier between the decision maker and external parties, such as salespeople, recruiters, or other individuals seeking to make contact. The gatekeeper's role is to filter and manage the flow of information, calls, and requests that reach the decision maker, and to protect their time and attention. They can be found in many different organizations, from businesses to government agencies. They can be either formal or informal gatekeepers, in formal one is assign by the organization as a secretary, personal assistant, or receptionist, while in informal one could be a team leader, manager or supervisor who control the access to the decision maker.

1.     Build a relationship with the gatekeeper. Treat them with respect and kindness, and try to understand their perspective. They may be more willing to help you if you build a rapport with them.

2.     Be direct and specific when asking to speak with the decision maker. Explain the purpose of your call or email and how it will benefit them.

3.     Use a personal touch. If you know the name of the decision maker, address them by name in your communication and try to make a connection with them.

4.     Be persistent but respectful. Follow up on your request to speak with the decision maker, but avoid being pushy or aggressive.

The idea Man or lackey doing research

·      A necessary step in the process

·      Could be the end user or  champion of the process

·      Will have the appropriate on the information on the item/project

Questions to ask to drill down to the decision maker 

1 "Can you tell me a bit about your role and responsibilities in the company?"

1. "Who has the final say on this matter?"
2. "Can you tell me about the decision-making process for this project?"
3. "Who is the budget holder for this initiative?"
4. "Can you tell me about the chain of command for this decision?"
5. "Who would I need to speak with to move forward with this proposal?"
6. "Who is the person responsible for this initiative, can you introduce me to them?"

The decision Maker 

1. Look for the person who is accountable for the results of a particular decision or action.
2. Check the organizational chart to see who holds the highest position in the relevant department or division.
3. Research the company or organization's leadership team and identify the key decision makers.
4. Network and ask for introductions to key decision makers from industry peers or contacts.

The UC Moment 

There is always a bigger fish 

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I. Introduction to ChatGPT

• Brief overview of what ChatGPT is and how it works
• ChatGPT (Generative Pre-trained Transformer)[1] is a chatbot launched by OpenAI in November 2022. It is built on top of OpenAI's GPT-3.5 family of large language models, and is fine-tuned with both supervised and reinforcement learning techniques.
• Reached 1 million subscribers users in a week. 
• An OpenAI blog post states that their ChatGPT model is trained with a deep machine learning technique called Reinforcement Learning from Human Feedback (RLHF) that helps simulate dialogue, answer follow-up questions, admit mistakes, challenge incorrect premises and reject inappropriate requests.
• Setting the stage for the discussion of the pros and cons
   
  • Clearly this will have impact in our communications in the future. Will the benefits outweigh the disadvantages? Let’s take a look 
• 
  

II. Pros of ChatGPT

• Efficient and fast communication with customers
• Ability to handle multiple conversations at once
• Can provide quick and accurate responses to frequently asked questions
• Creates content easily and quickly ( Pro or con?) 
• Presents and thinks in an organized and logical fashion.
• ? frees up time for other or better pursuits? 

III. Cons of ChatGPT

• Limited to providing pre-determined responses
• Difficulty handling more complex or nuanced questions
• Lack of personalization and human touch
• It makes one question the content being provided. Not original or human made?
• The school system will need to respond to schoolwork, papers. Will it change us forever? 
• Potential security issues? Spam or virus generation 

IV. Balancing the pros and cons: when is ChatGPT appropriate to use?

• Situations where ChatGPT can be a valuable tool (e.g. customer service, FAQs)
• Situations where human interaction is still necessary (e.g. sales, personalized support)

V. Conclusion and future outlook for ChatGPT

• Recap of the main points discussed
• Thoughts on the potential future developments and evolution of ChatGPT technology

The UC Moment : ChatGPT is here and prepare yourself. 

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Happy New year to all our listeners worldwide. We are taking this moment to thank you and reflect on the last year. 
We always end our episodes with the UC Moment. A takeaway from the discussion that you can learn from and share. 
Brandon: B-Positive, like my blood type
James : Be less of  and call out the passive aggressive. 

Much thanks to the faithful Uncommon Communicator Podcast listeners. Are hope is that you find our topics useful and that it will make an impact in your life.  If you have found value, please share with your friends, family and network. 

We plan to bring enlightenment to the topic of communication coming this year in full force. 

Please drop us a line at [email protected] and give us your feed back. what do you like, and what do you wan to hear more of this coming year. 

If there are things that need improvement , please provide those as well. We can not get better with out your input. 

Happy New Year and we will see you on the internet!!

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School house rock is a modern take on the instructional hymn 

Schoolhouse Rock! is an American interstitial programming series of animated musical educational short films (and later, videos) that aired during the Saturday morning children's programming block on the U.S. television network ABC. The themes covered included grammar, science, economics, history, mathematics, and civics. The series' original run lasted from 1973 to 1984; it was later revived from 1993 to 1996.[2] Additional episodes were produced in 2009 for direct-to-video release

·      Conjunction Junction 

·      I’m just a bill

·      Three is the magic number

·      A noun is person place or thing

Max Fischer story using pop music lyrics in the classroom

Keys to the success of Instructional hymns and School house rocks 

·      MUSIC PERKS UP STUDENTS

·      MUSIC MOTIVATES CRITICAL THINKING

The UC Moment: Consider the appropriate  vehicle for your communication 

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Welcome to Part 4 of our 5 part series on Communication Evolution where we have been looking into forgotten forms of communication that still have relevance in our life 

The Drum Beat

Based on natural languages and speech patterns, drum beats have been used as a means of communication by many civilizations throughout the history of the world. 

For ceremonies and rituals, drum rhythms can get the adrenaline pumping for expressing the joy of life with celebratory dance…or as the driving force behind war with its sound of thunderous terror.

In ancient villages, drummers sent messages, poems, and gossip because it was much faster to relay this way than it was for a person to run the same distance. They communicated details by changing the beats’ speed, pitch, and timbre.

Developed and used by cultures living in forested areas, drums served as an early form of long-distance communication, and were used during ceremonial and religious functions.

In Africa, New Guinea and the tropical America, people have used drum telegraphy to communicate with each other from far away for centuries. When European expeditions came into the jungles to explore the local forest, they were surprised to find that the message of their coming and their intention was carried through the woods a step in advance of their arrival. An African message can be transmitted at the speed of 100 miles in an hour.

n central and east Africa, drum patterns represent the stresses, syllable lengths and tone of the particular African language. In tone languages, where syllables are associated with a certain tone, some words are distinguished only by their suprasegmental profile. Therefore, syllable drum languages can often transfer a message using the tonal phonemes alone.

In certain languages, the pitch of each syllable is uniquely determined in relation to each adjacent syllable. In these cases, messages can be transmitted as rapid beats at the same speed as speech as the rhythm and melody both match the equivalent spoken utterance.

Misinterpretations can occur due to the highly ambiguous nature of the communication. This is reduced by context effects and the use of stock phrases. For example, in Jabo, most stems are monosyllabic. By using a proverb or honorary title to create expanded versions of an animal, person's name or object, the corresponding single beat can be replaced with a rhythmic and melodic motif representing the subject. In practice not all listeners understand all of the stock phrases; the drum language is understood only to the level of their immediate concern.

The UC Discussion 

The concept of beating a drum or singing instructions can be considered the more personal, emotional side of communication in which the written word either isn’t functional or brings about the desired result.  

Speak in a rhythm that matches your charisma

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Welcome to Part 3 of our 5 part series on Communication Evolution
                                                                       The heliograph

A heliograph (from Ancient Greek ἥλιος (hḗlios) 'sun', and γράφειν (gráphein) 'to write') is a semaphore system that signals by flashes of sunlight (generally using Morse code) reflected by a mirror. The flashes are produced by momentarily pivoting the mirror, or by interrupting the beam with a shutter.[1] The heliograph was a simple but effective instrument for instantaneous optical communication over long distances during the late 19th and early 20th century.[1] Its main uses were military, survey and forest protection work. Heliographs were standard issue in the British and Australian armies until the 1960s, and were used by the Pakistani army as late as 1975.[2]

In this episode we learn about this forgotten form of communication. The heliograph is the forerunner to fiber optics. 

Using the idea of mirrors its important to discuss how our communications mirrors 
The UC Moment is:
Our actions Mirrors our thoughts. Our words are the mirror of our soul. 

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The Semaphore Flag Signaling System

A fascinating way of disseminating information, the semaphore tower was first implemented in 1792 at 556 stations over France for the primary source of communication for military and national applications. 

The structure’s design had two large towers with a single crossbar between them on which were two pivoting arms. The combination of positions between the crossbar and arms equaled 196 characters. Those characters could be combined to created thousands of codes. 

This method eventually evolved to the positioning of smaller flags and was used for communication between naval vessels for hundreds of years (even Napoleon used one version). 

There were two critical downfalls of the semaphore system. First, it offered no secrecy. Second, it was practically invisible at night or during heavy fog and rain.

The semaphore train system of a hundred years ago (when a train must wait before entering a single track until the semaphore permits travel) might sound similar to semaphores in multithreaded computer programming in which a thread waits for permission to proceed and then signals that it has proceeded by performing an operation on the semaphore.
Here are some Communication Red Flags :

1. Conflict avoidance. Humans, by nature, either confront conflict or bury it. “Most people don’t have an agreement on how to talk about hard issues when they are both ready to talk,” Farmer says. “Then the problems get worse and worse.”
Determine how each team member best deals with conflict, then make sure the conflict isn’t allowed to fester

2. Avoiding Eye Contact

3. Explosive conversations. “When anger triggers anger, you have two people angry at the same time and nobody is listening,” Farmer says. Problems cannot be solved unless both parties have their turn in the listening role.
 “The only time that anger works in a conversation is when you have someone who is a good listener,” he says. “Good listening de-escalates anger as the angry person can’t stay angry, they want to be understood.” 

4. Asking questions with out waiting for an answer

5. Criticism and negative comments. “A relationship needs to be 9/10 positive,” Farmer says. “If the ratio gets anywhere close to 50-50 it will seem like its 90% negative. You need to work overtime on building a relationship with positives. Then the occasional jerk behavior is no big deal.”

6. The persons conversation always revolves around them.
 
7. Bad apologies. All people make mistakes that require a heartfelt and sincere apology. “But, a lot of people don’t know how to make a good apology, so people hold on to resentment,” Farmer says. “That resentment is a way of getting even for past troubles.”

The UC Moment : Identify and pay attention to your red flags 

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