The Unvarnished Truth Podcast

Nothing is too human to be spiritual. In fact, everything we do, every aspect of this human arc, is an opportunity to access the Divine. Even the smallest action can be elevated, undertaken with devotion, and made sacred. I’ve been thinking of this a lot recently, as the process of creating a thriving spiritual mentoring practice requires a lot of attention to the physical world. I find I move in waves, with long periods of focus on systems and structure giving way to equal time spent in silence, in communication with the All That Is, and the receptivity of my daily oracle an

d spiritual practice. I’ve spent the past couple of months on infrastructure, reimagining and then rebuilding my website, Infinite Wisdom Collective. Creating the foundation of all that I offer, in a detailed and coherent format, was an important rite of passage for me. Having spent my former professional career being the person behind the scenes creating structure and systems for others, it was truly an act of devotion to build this infrastructure for myself.

And yet so many judgments came forward as I focused on that creative process. Why can’t I manage to build a website and produce daily writing and channeled content? Why can’t I switch from one side of my brain to the other on the daily, why am I so undisciplined? And then the real questions emerged, the deeper through line. Why do I still equate a “good day” with my productivity, the visible output of my efforts? What voice inside of me deems being able to learn a new platform, create a website, write content for it, choose colors and photography that is visually appealing, and proofread and edit the results as “not enough”? What unhinged self-imposed standard of perfection am I adhering to that, in the face of doing all of that work, I somehow fell short because I wasn’t able to do more? Holy ridiculous expectations, Batman! What the actual???

I wish I could say I was the only one who suffers from this internal dialogue, from this insane attachment to doing as a way of proving worth. Frankly, I don’t know one woman who doesn’t hold this in their consciousness in some form. I have a deep awareness of it, and have worked for years to recognize and reframe this type of all or nothing thinking. Most of the time I am pretty solid with the expectations I hold for myself. But since I have moved to Luxor, and begun deconstructing the myths of my American life, I have noticed the insidious ways that I still judge myself around doing rather than celebrating my Self for Being. I thought moving was the breaking free of the gilded cage, but I realize now it was just the passageway. Living outside of the system gives me a perspective that I could not possibly have had while I was inside the cage. Every creature comfort, every distraction in the form of entertainment, every trapping of my “good life”, all provided me with a life that was just enough. Just enough to keep me on the hamster wheel, striving for more, just enough to keep me in spaces and relationships that kept my hunger at bay but never satiated, just enough to keep me searching outside of myself for a fulfillment that was always within, and just enough distraction to keep me from truly occupying that place in my soul that is Home.

I live with much less now - no TV, no streaming, slowly uncoupling myself from the shackles of social media. There is less noise coming from inside the house, even as the daily buzz of life on the West Bank crackles around me. Call to prayer reminds me to pause and breathe, the rooster next door crowing at all hours signals a return to simplicity and the natural order of things, the appearance of a herd of goats grazing in the field across from my home brings a joy my heart cannot name. For me, this is the life. Maybe I am just a farmer at heart, like generations of my family before me. Or maybe this return to a simpler way of Being is a deeper medicine being revealed. As we increasingly rely on technology for the illusion of connection, as AI takes on a life of its own, and we abdicate our autonomy to a reliance on apps to measure every aspect of our lives, what happens if we simply unplug?

I have been living this question for a while now. Believe it or not, rebuilding my website was a step in this direction. It is also part of why you have not heard from me as often here. I've been simplifying my business structure, with one system that will eventually host all of my offerings, provide a portal for clients enrolled in classes, all in an ecosystem free of censorship and supportive of co-creation. In all honesty, I love to geek out in the systems and organizational aspects of entrepreneurship. It feeds my Capricorn need for structure, and it is a foundation where I can grow, evolve, and create community. Technology is necessary, yet it does not need to run the show. When it provides the framework required to free up my Pisces’ energy to write, to dream, to create, and to bring through the infinite wisdom available to us all, it is a blessing.

To that end, as I migrate away from mainstream social media, Substack will continue to be the home for my writing, as well as my podcast, access to my membership and other offerings, and the primary “social media” platform for communicating and connecting with the Infinite Wisdom Collective community. I appreciate all of you who have been on this journey with me, and invite you to explore the new Infinite Wisdom Collective offerings, or simply to share my work so other like minded souls can find it.

If any of this is resonating with you — if you are also tired of the noise and are curious as to what is underneath it — I want you to know that reclaiming the silence is anything but quiet. That is the essence of my Soul Awakening course. Six weeks. Reclaiming the intuition and the sovereign voice that the noise has been drowning out. The next cohort is forming now. To learn more check out Soul Awakening, or book an Alignment Call to see if it’s right for you.

Much love.

I was having a conversation last night with two brilliant women I know, discussing the nuances of being a spiritual mentor. One of the issues that came up is this trend of “ascending”. Please understand, I am 100% there for our evolution in consciousness - I have lived and breathed it for decades. But I have noticed this troubling trend of denigrating and/or bypassing our human emotions and condition in some effort to be more “spiritual”. I see it as this kind of spiritual purity test, that only the light and positivity has value and that less exalted emotions, such as anger or fear, are to be suppressed or eliminated in service to ascension. I loudly call b******t. I am East Coast spiritual - that means a healthy dose of reality that begins and ends with one of the foundational tenets of my own spiritual practice - We Are Divine Beings Having A Human Experience.

We are not meant to deny our humanity in order to become some being of light in human form - We Are Already That, whether we know it or not. What we are here to do is to recognize our own light, to allow its radiance to illuminate us, to connect to source and to each other, and to EMBODY OUR DIVINE HUMANITY. No bypassing, no b******t, just resurrection within. No denial of our human expression or messy human emotions. Being human is not the problem - being unaware of our divinity is. Every aspect of our humanity is there for us - opportunities to explore our reactions and responses, to understand our relationships to our Self and others, and to Evolve in our consciousness. So strive to be the best version of your self you can be, and let your luminosity shine and guide you into deeper connections with Self and others.

Stop looking for some spiritual escape hatch from the reality of the human condition. It sucks out there right now. The world is on fire, we see in real time the dangerous delusions of a madman gripped by greed and corruption, surrounded by craven sycophants who care only about how much more of the pie they can grab for themselves, while the economy for everyone else crashes, the environment is ravaged by deregulation and greed, and people are slaughtered for the evil ambitions of criminals. The only way out is through. We don’t need to pop off the planet to return to our star being selves. We need to stand on terra firma, fully anchored in our humanity, radiating our embodied Divinity, shepherding each other through. Blessed be.

If you are looking for accompaniment through these troubled times, schedule a Wisdom Within Discovery Call @ www.infinitewisdomcollective.com - I’m here for you, in all of your divine humanity. Much love.

It has been just over six months since I moved to Luxor. I realize now that my soul was ready to be here long before I made the decision to relocate in May of 2024. It took my head a while to get in on the act, but after a few trips to suss out the veracity of my mad plan, I knew it was time. A summer spent weeding through my personal belongings, giving away so much of my accumulation, the trappings of a life I had begun to realize was slowly suffocating me, through that last weekend in September packing the four ridiculously heavy suitcases that contained all I had deemed necessary to carry, and the trajectory of my life changed. A leap of faith, taking flight from my gilded cage. My old life is now represented by a storage unit filled with a few pieces of furniture, artwork, my good pans, and some random decor; a PO Box that collects what mail still trickles through, and a few bins of crystals in the loving custody of a trusted friend. I arrived in Egypt on October 1, 2025, reeling from the abrupt endings of friendships that apparently couldn’t withstand me stepping into the light of my own life. It is funny how when you follow your heart, you find out who else treasures your happiness. My circle is smaller now, yet so deeply trusted. Geographic distance is not a hindrance to connection, and all that was meant to travel with me has made that long journey, what was ancillary left behind.

In many ways I feel like I am just landing here, while simultaneously feeling like I have never lived anywhere else. This is Home. I have yet to find the words to describe the utter peace I feel, the way my nervous system just breathes here, steady and quiet, opening to the cosmic flow of creation in the most profound way. There are moments when I feel like an infant realizing I have hands and feet, stumbling about as I take my first tentative steps. Odd things disorient me - looking at a ketchup bottle with the label in Arabic sends my brain into some sort of spasm of distrust. I Know it is ketchup, but can’t understand the words, so how can I trust what I see, what I Know to be true. Egypt has that effect - it calls us to trust what we know to be true, regardless of the programs and propaganda that swirl around us. For me, Egypt brings everything into Essence, stripping away the superfluous b******t to reveal the core of an ancient, eternal energy that brings me back to my Self, if I am willing to lay my soul bare. I carry only that which is mine now. For decades, especially throughout my accounting career, I was the poster child for over-responsibility. My worth was shackled to my productivity, to how much I shouldered, and carrying the burdens so others could shine became part of a deep conditioning that made me a “success” at work while bleeding my own soul dry. I live without those chains now, investing my creativity in my own endeavors - in writing, in my spiritual teaching and mentorship, in living as the oracle I am, in unending conversation with the sacred. I have a deep and abiding relationship with the Divine - God, Goddess, Spirit, Cosmos - whatever name it is given is a means to convey the majesty of the All That Is, the connection of souls emanating from one source, an infinite energetic web of interdependent life continuously evolving by witnessing itself in relation to its collective Self.

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Luxor calls me deeper into that witnessing, guiding me to explore the Holy of Holies within myself. At the heart of each temple here is a sanctuary space, a place supplicants are guided to as they deepen their connection to both heaven and earth. We are Divine Beings having a Human experience. Our prime impetus is to return to Sacred Union within ourselves - Divine Feminine and Holy Masculine, our Sacred Humanity in harmony with our Embodied Divinity. I believe this is an ancient encoding within us, an alchemy we are meant to experience within our Self, so we can recognize the divinity in each other, and evolve the collective. We are all One. We are on a precipice of destruction that is cataclysmic, a redefining of our human experience. Understanding that we are interdependent, that humanity is a living organism that cannot survive without the planet we are on, the atmosphere we breathe, and most of all, each other, is at critical importance now. The forces of division and greed, stoking separation and negation of our own humanity, are being revealed in an unprecedented way. We can no longer hide behind old narratives of self assigned superlatives, of ideology that denigrates and divides. There is no sitting this one out, protecting “your peace”. The only way out is through, hand in hand, recognizing all of our humanity. There is a freedom in letting go of the creature comforts, the endless scrolling and countless streaming platforms that are designed to distract us, to keep us immersed in a virtual escape while staying trapped in an endless cycle of consumption. We have an opportunity to awaken in every moment, to initiate our own resurrection. We do this by eliminating the distractions, by releasing the unnecessary burdens, by stepping away from the unconsciously adopted constructs that define so many of our lives. All of the things I “needed” in my old life, the distractions and compulsions, the ways I dulled the edges so I could keep functioning in a system that was, by design, stealing my joy, became irrelevant when I stepped outside of the box. For me, that meant walking away from a life that no longer offered me what I needed, to risk an epic fail in order to live in congruence with my soul. I have always had a flair for the dramatic, but it took me decades to reclaim the part of me that trusted so deeply what I Knew that I would follow that voice within. At this holy time, with a world on fire and awash with chaos and madness, it is time for each of us to look within, to listen deeply, and to take the first step toward our own rebirth. We no longer need the chains of the past to anchor us to what was, we need the courage of our Presence to co-create what is becoming. It is our choice. May we bear witness to our collective resurrection, a resurrection of Love.

Blessed be.

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Oracle Cards:

✨ Wailing Tree: The Shaman’s Dream Oracle by Alberto Villoldo & Colette Baron-Reid

🌀 Enter the Garden of Delights: Rumi Oracle by Alana Fairchild

✨ Protection: Sacred Destiny Oracle by Denise Linn

🌀 Flamingo Spirit: The Spririt Animal Oracle by Colette Baron-Reid

When I would get caught in a cycle of hopelessness, my therapist Patti would remind me that the past does not determine the future. The part of me that didn’t want to let go of my suffering, because it was oddly comfortable in its familiarity, would rail against this idea. “But it is an indicator of probability”, I would respond, invested in my pattern of despair because I knew how to function in melancholy, I knew how to navigate the river of disappointment I perceived my life to be. She would look at me with the patience of Buddha, and very lovingly remind me to come back to the present moment. Was my suffering in that moment because of a remembrance of past hurt, or of something actively present? As I healed, in large part due to her patience and unwavering presence calling me forward into my own, I recognized that I had clung to a model of suffering because it was a framework I was familiar with, a space that reinforced shame and blame and allowed me the safety of staying small. I could curl up at the foot of the Wailing Tree and lament my broken heart, railing at the injustice that had caused yet another failed relationship or plan gone awry. It took me some time, and a lot of deconstruction of my own protection patterns, before I realized that I could offer my tears to water the roots of reconciliation within myself, and move past that tree, into a garden of possibility.

When I think back on that younger me who was so fearful, stumbling around in the vestiges of unhealed trauma, an insatiable drive to understand my Self fueling my rather relentless pursuit of “healing”, I have such profound gratitude for her perseverance. Her determination is the reason this iteration of me had the temerity to walk away from my gilded cage, from a life of relative comfort and familiarity, and move to a foreign country where I am the minority, I don’t speak the language (yet), and I had no established social safety net. That young woman I had labeled as broken was an absolute bad ass, and the not as young woman I am now bows to her fortitude. When people tell me I am brave for moving to Egypt, I always say I don’t feel brave. Brave is looking at all of your s**t - every place you have been hurt or hurt another, every wound and trauma, every way you have checked out of your own life, every loss and grief - owning it, and waking up each morning choosing to love. Moving here was just what I had to do. Opening my heart again after it has been broken is courage. Being willing to enter the garden, to see all of the beauty of life even when the dumpster fire of the world is raging alongside you, this is brave. Delight is its own form of defiance. In a world of increasing chaos, joy is its own radical form of protection.

I love that the cards show so clearly that the tree of suffering and reconciliation is also the tree of deep roots, of wisdom, of steadfast protection. It is always our choice how we view our circumstances - because as Flamingo reminds us, life is Both / And. Patti was right, the past doesn’t determine the future, it is just information. We determine the future with what we choose in each moment, fully present, aware, guided by love and compassion. In a world where too many act from greed, self-righteousness, and cruelty, choosing Love is not passive or weak. Choosing Love is an act of defiance, of presence and strength, an embodiment of the only force that can drive out the darkness. And choosing Love means choosing our Self, to stand fully in our Essence and shine without apology, free of the self imposed shame of the past, allowing the person we are in this moment to be Enough. Perfectly imperfect, embodying our luminosity, acknowledging our flaws, and showing up all the same. We can’t change the past, and the future is in the chaos of formation. What we choose today matters. Choose Love. Choose Joy. Choose Presence. The only time is Now.

Blessed be.

Oracle Cards:

✨ Hollow Bone: The Shaman’s Dream Oracle by Alberto Villoldo & Colette Baron-Reid

🌀 Becoming: Journey of Love Oracle by Alana Fairchild

✨ Tenderness: The Priestess of Light Oracle by Sandra Anne Taylor & Kimberly Webber

🌀 Ancient Oak Spirit: The Sacred Forest Oracle by Denise Linn

“Your soul chose obscurity to survive. Now embrace visibility to thrive.” This was the message that poured through as I was channeling this morning. For me, there is no denying the truth of it. For many years I stayed hidden, living an outer life of practicality and an inner life of deep excavation. Healing drove me, in many ways emptying out the persona of me that had been so carefully crafted to stay under the radar while still functioning in the “real world”. This was a necessary process for me, becoming the hollow bone. When the constructs of expectations were dismantled, my soul began to sing. Through my own hollowing, I found the path to becoming.

I am still becoming, growing and evolving in real time. My prayer is that I am still becoming as I draw my last breath, that I am always in the beauty of my own evolution. My life here in Luxor demands a different presence, a solidity of Self that was previously unexplored. I have returned to a place within myself that is imminently teachable, while claiming the teacher that I am. There is much about life here that humbles me - the generosity of the family that has welcomed me as their own, my lack of language skills and the dependency that invokes, navigating what used to be simple daily tasks in a new landscape. No aspect of my life is the same, save the words that flow through me as I both live and observe the unfolding of what is. In my own hollowing, I have found a deep self-compassion, a tenderness for the me that often feels like I am floundering as I find my way through the nuance of daily life in uncharted terrain.

So many of the ways I have self identified are challenged here. So many of the old values, the markers of merit in a framework that previously defined me, feel increasingly obsolete. Adhering to old structures, when the world around me demands coherence, rhythm, and resonance, is an exercise in futility. I now let the day structure itself, feeling into the energy and utilizing what is present to me to determine my tasks. I trust in my own strength, the discipline of those old systems an echo, leveraged in a vastly different way. I allow those deep roots to anchor me, so I stand more solidly in my Presence. I am visible here, like an exotic bird landed on a city street, my ethnicity and nationality exposing me, whether I like it or not. For much of my life, I would not have withstood the scrutiny. The gift of Egypt has been that I trust the deep roots of my soul, the strength of my heart, and the willingness to be emptied of ego so I may be replenished with Grace time and time again. I shine, therefore I Am. Let yourself be emptied, so your Soul may thrive.

Blessed be. Much love.

Oracle Cards:

✨ Magician’s Sword: The Shaman’s Dream Oracle by Alberto Villoldo & Colette Baron-Reid

🌀 Shifting Universes: Journey of Love Oracle by Alana Fairchild

✨ Grateful Optimism: The Priestess of Light Oracle by Sandra Anne Taylor & Kimberly Webber

🌀 Wolf Spirit: The Sacred Forest Oracle by Denise Linn

As the sun enters Capricorn, marking the still point of the sun and the shortest day of the year, we celebrate the Winter Solstice - the return of the Light in the Northern Hemisphere. The calendar year draws to an end, and the wheel turns, beginning a new season. The cards begin with #37, a 1, the number of new beginnings. We are called to action by the Magician’s Sword, a fiery re-ignition of our soul’s purpose. Sword of truth, sword of justice, cutting through the doublespeak and obfuscation, a fierce tool of clarity and coherence. We are opening into a new paradigm, where the illusions of the past will no longer stand. It is time to choose how you will wield your own magic, and if you will allow your brilliance to be unsheathed.

The landscape is evolving, and it does indeed feel as if the universe shifts from one day to the next. Most days feel as if I am living inside of a kaleidoscope, when a single turn can open an entirely new vista. And so it is with the wheel of the year, with each turn we enter a new phase, a new season, all of which is leading us to a new collective experience. What that will be depends on our willingness to show up in our luminosity, unapologetically radiant, standing in the strength of our vulnerability and the depth of our empathy. There are sadly those who denigrate those qualities, sneering at vulnerability and empathy as weakness, blind to the extraordinary connection they offer us. In this moment of stillness, as we leave the past and move toward our future, we are invited to look back at where we have been, at the strengths we carry within us, and offer gratitude. Not platitude gratitude, the perfunctory daily list that is more rote than ritual, but the living essence of gratitude, the jubilant acknowledgment of this very moment, and all that has been required of us to arrive, fully embodied, at the doorstep of a new dawn. In this moment, like every other, we choose our resonance. As we turn our eyes to what is becoming, to the future we usher in, let us choose our gratitude with a generous side of optimism.

It is fitting that this reading concludes with Wolf Spirit, with its simple message of family. In the pause before the days begin to lengthen, in the midst of holiday season, when we humans gravitate toward communal gatherings, we are reminded that family is more than biology, more than the often dysfunctional constructs in which we were raised. For many years I dreaded the holidays because my life didn’t fit the picture perfect norm. It took me too many years of shaming myself for being different before I understood that most people live beyond the norm. I am 5,000 miles from my family of origin this holiday season, yet I am in the embrace of my community here in Luxor, the tribe of expats that wander this ancient land, and my Egyptian family, the generous souls who have taken me under their wing, offering me a haven in this unfolding adventure. Wolf is one of my totems, and wolf energy is strong in me. I roam on my own, and it has been said that I am a “bit of a lone wolf”. Yet this season I am filled with a deep and abiding gratitude for my pack, for the grace of those who live the truth of their heart and find a way to create community. As you celebrate the season, set an extra place at the table, reach out to the ones who drift in and out of spaces. Together we can build a world where those who so choose can come in from the cold, curl up by the fire, and connect us as a global family. We Are All One. Blessed Solstice. Much love.

Blessed be.

Oracle Cards:

✨ Covenant: The Shaman’s Dream Oracle by Alberto Villoldo & Colette Baron-Reid

🌀 Simplicity: Journey of Love Oracle by Alana Fairchild

✨ Twin Flames: The Priestess of Light Oracle by Sandra Anne Taylor & Kimberly Webber

🌀 Standing Stones: The Sacred Forest Oracle by Denise Linn

We are in a powerful time, crossing an energetic and cosmic threshold from what was to what is becoming. The sun and moon will conjunct at 28SAG24, dancing with the Galactic Center at 26SAG23. Our conscious and unconscious in an embrace at the center of All That Is. As above, so below. The messages today reflect this holy union, within ourselves, and with our Divinity. As we cross this opening into a new lunar cycle, preparing for the Solstice in two days, we are reminded today to elevate our commitments, to pursue only that which is sacred. This includes walking away from behaviors, relationships, or entanglements that are out of alignment, allowing those cycles to end so we move forward in deeper congruence with our soul. It is time to drop the complications - to quiet the monkey mind and return to our center, trusting in the quiet space within, allowing our hearts and minds to find resonance once again, to rejoin in eternal connection.

As within, so without. The strength and passion of the tiger, illuminated by the energy of Source, a bridge between soul partners. Yet what if that partner is Self? The energies of this new moon call us into a deeper relationship with ourselves as Divine Beings having a human experience, a deeper relationship with our acknowledgement of our soul as a drop in the cosmic ocean of the infinite galactic expanse. We are invited to be in Sacred Union within ourselves, and with the collective web of energy from which we have emerged. We are being called to remember our shared humanity, to shed the illusion of separation so we may reshape the very human infrastructure in which we find ourselves. So many speak of a new era, a new earth that we are co-creating. We are at the entrance to the portal of that new expression of our humanity. How we cross the threshold will determine the nature of our new collective experience. Union within births harmony without. Shedding anything that keeps us from harmony within ourselves - old faces that are no longer how we wish to be seen in the world, relationships out of which we have evolved, constructs of our personalities that have protected the true face of our soul - our opportunity in this time is to thank them, bless them, and leave them the f**k behind.

Carry only what you need through the portal of your new beginning. Move through the passage of your heart, into the wonder of your soul. To pass through the stones requires courage, a willingness to leave what is comfortable and familiar to risk the unknown. Collectively, we have been hypnotized for decades, believing that the only way to be is to “succeed” in the very system designed to bleed our souls dry. There has never been a more important moment to break the chains that bind you than the one we are living through now. This new moon is less about setting intentions and more about setting the trajectory of our arrow and releasing it; taking the first step that will lead us out of the darkness, out of the maelstrom of chaos and into the profound beauty of the renewed cosmic order. Take a step today, even if it is a microscopic one. Do one thing differently. Feel into the frequency that you want for your life. Peace, adventure, harmony, happiness, love - whatever it is that lights you up, identify the place within you that feels enlivened. This is what you are meant to carry forward. Choose wisely. Choose your Self, choose a new way of Being. Choose a more beautiful future for us all. Much love.

Blessed be.

“I had a revelation, like runaway horses

Took to the road with a carnival show, roll on…”

Robbie Robertson’s Testimony is one of my favorite songs, and it is stampeding through my psyche this morning. “Come bear witness, I’ve danced among the ruins… I’ve walked a crooked mile…. In my soul, I’m howling at the moon…. Declare yourself, I will testify. ” Spirit speaks to us in so many ways - through oracles, through synchronicities, through the raw genius of artists who move through the world without armor, their souls shimmering and fragile, chronicling the experience of our shared humanity in the beauty and tragedy of their art, song, or story, reminding us that our very existence is Art, is an act of creation, of devotion, of intention. I write this morning across from an ancient wonder, the Colossi of Memnon, once again humbled by their presence, by how they have remained stalwart in the thousands of years since they were formed by hands that likely did not realize they were paying homage not just to a king, but to our eternal humanity.

I had lost my voice recently, not physically, but in the sense of my verbal expression. I find myself in a vortex of toning and light language, yet unable to form words that are in coherence with my soul. I have been overwhelmed by sound - screeching motorbikes, rattling tuk-tuks, rumbling tour buses, howling dogs, crying children, animated conversations in a language I am barely beginning to understand. And then there is the land itself, the holy mountain singing a lament so powerful my heart drowns in an echo of inexplicable and relentless sorrow. Present day life at a sharp angle to the resting place of kings, the birthplace of my soul. No wonder words failed me. In the cacophony, I had both lost and rediscovered my resonance, returning to an elemental frequency that transcends my verbal self and communicates fully through vibration. A single note, held until the breath leaves my body and my heart gasps for the next inspiration. The song of the cosmos, sung in unwitting chorus by a planet tenaciously maintaining its rhythm. A raptor circles overhead, reminding me that from his perspective, the colossi are small, a simple guidepost on a landscape that unfolds far beyond my view. We are of both heaven and earth, Divine and Human, cosmic and terrestrial. As with the juxtaposition of past and present, the invitation is in how to honor both.

So I sit here, the cold and dusty Luxor wind prompting a flood of tears from my dry eyes, the sun warming me as I sip yet another Nescafé, honing inward to hear the seemingly distant song of my soul. It is a precarious thread that binds us to this ephemeral voice, to our own eternal whisper. It is easy to lose your voice, your essence, in the chaos of a world on fire. It is a privilege to even be entertaining the thought of it, and one I do not take lightly. It took walking away from everything familiar for me to realize that I exist to create beauty for the sake of beauty. For so long I have struggled with “finding my purpose”, when the answer has been at my fingertips, in the letters that form words that form sentences and paragraphs, expressions of my soul in beautiful cadence and rhythm, a song of story and voice, of perspective and view. It doesn’t matter how my words are received, if they are loved or hated, if they are a welcome resonance or are a wildly rejected affront. It only matters that they live outside of my body, outside of my mind alive with a cavalcade of musings, in full expression of my soul. They are my Testimony. And so, I testify…

Much love. Blessed be.

Oracle Cards:

✨ Drifter: The Shaman’s Dream Oracle by Alberto Villoldo & Colette Baron-Reid

🌀 The Choice: Journey of Love Oracle by Alana Fairchild

✨ The Water Oracle: The Healing Waters Oracle by Rebecca Campbell

🌀 Ivory Wish-Fulfilling Crow: White Light Oracle by Alana Fairchild

I arrived in Luxor 64 days ago, with four suitcases and a vague plan. 64 days is the blink of an eye in a lifetime, and yet it feels as if I have always been here, so natural is the rhythm of Luxor life. Someone said to me the other day that Egypt is all charisma and chaos. This is true, and I would add to that creation. This eternal land is an incubator, holding deep lineages and anchoring souls to an energetic birthright of which most are unaware. From chaos to cosmic order, Egypt is a study in creation. As above, so below. The paradox of this place is that in two months of not “Doing”, of simply going where the day takes me, I am beginning to see the rich tapestry that I have been seemingly aimlessly weaving take shape. The hamster wheel is far behind me now, and as I drift further into this energetic sea, shores of untold possibility are revealed. It is for me to choose.

Choice has always been an issue for me. Back in my lack of self trust era, I relied on my intellect to guide me. What is sensible, what is practical, what makes the most money? From my view here adrift, I recognize how these were fundamentally the wrong questions. They provided me a certain safety in the guise of success, while sidestepping contentment and happiness. Today I choose peace, I choose a life without the trappings that are exactly that - a trap - designed to keep us shackled to the wheel, ever turning and grinding us into submission, so we eventually don’t even recognize we have a choice. I choose the simple pleasure of an afternoon coffee, watching the day fade into dusk, as my soul sings the song of the oracle, the wisdom of the cosmos pouring through me like a deluge of summer rain. For the first time in my life I am in such deep surrender, trusting the path as it unfolds before me.

Choice is trust, in Self, in the Divine, in our own Knowing. It also involves deep listening, and a fearless commitment to the still, small voice within. It is allowing space for the inspiration and the dreams, the visions that appear like a flash of lightning, fleeting and lost if we don’t capture their essence in our hearts. For the past few weeks I’ve been feeling as if I’m losing my mind, because in a way I am. I’m paying homage to Neptune now, allowing my intuition and connection to the Cosmos to flow unimpeded by the restrictions of self doubt or fear. It is as if that ivory crow, cawing from her perch of wisdom, is clearing all the debris left over from my previous iteration of Self. She reveals the dream in a language I am still mastering, yet I speak enough of it to feel what is emerging from the field. And so I weave, I listen and dream and create, and bear witness as a life I had never imagined births itself into Being. My life, in this moment, is a wish I never even knew I had being fulfilled. Deep bow, and so much love.

Blessed be.

We live our lives operating under some fairly basic illusions. The illusion of safety, the illusion of separateness, the illusion of duality. They are constructs that confine us to certain operating modes, locked into the matrix of working to live, sacrificing our passion for a sense of security that is as fleeting as a cumulus cloud on a windy day. I have come to a point in my life, my second Saturn return, where every lesson I’ve learned is being held up in the light, requiring scrutiny. My path in life has meandered, some of it predictable and conventional, some of it wandering into uncharted territories, leading me further from the shores I know into a vast and beckoning sea of possibility. That which makes the least sense on paper makes the most sense to my heart. It is now impossible to ignore its plea to live a life less ordinary, to value love over fear. I recognize that all of the things in my world designed to make me feel “safe” are in and of themselves uncertain, and the only certainty is the peace within my heart. It is unshakable, and leading me to a life that calls me deeper into my own evolution.

I wrote this in the shadow of the Great Pyramid at Giza, a portal to so much more than I can articulate. I had climbed the stifling shaft to the King’s Chamber that morning, the end of a pilgrimage which began in Luxor and wound through the desert, to an oasis, and then back to the incomprehensible crush of humanity that is Cairo. The juxtaposition there is stark - the sounds of this bustling hotel, construction next door, motorcycles and cars jostling for position in the street nearby, horns and people and call to prayer filling the air with the life of this sprawling city, as the Great Pyramid stands sentinel to it all, the silent guardian reminding us of the mystery and history of which we have no memory, only a reverberating echo of resonance within our hearts. Eternal, impossible, and utterly captivating, Egypt is an unending question that captures my soul. If this pyramid exists, defying all conventional wisdom of how it could have been built, still standing thousands of years later, why do we buy into the misperception that our life must be dictated by norms that were established by some nameless patriarchal influence eons ago? Why have we clung so hard to an order that serves the few and leaves the many longing for more? We are in the early stages of its death throes, the last gasps of a dinosaur aware of its own extinction, thrashing wildly to maintain relevance through sheer force and belligerent presence. The more it gasps, the less air is available to it, yet it continues to struggle, to attempt to dictate the terms of its demise. It does not see the new paradigm sprouting up around it, seeded from love, watered with curiosity, and pruned with intention.

I see so many people shrinking in the fear of the unknown, their constructs of safety challenged by uncertainty. Why is what is undefined so frightening to us? As my Egyptian friends would say, it is life. Life is uncertain, unstable, chimerical, and ever evolving. Why have we burdened ourselves with expectations of predicability? We are suffocating from sameness, our vitality slipping away as we sink under the waves of complacency that keep us from our own enlivenment. We work at jobs that don’t fulfill us to earn money to buy things that we hope will fill the emptiness, the void inside that is the portal to our soul that we have neglected in our attempts to keep ourselves safe. It is always a shock when stability is wrested from us, when the unexpected blindsides us and we are scrambling to return to a what was that never truly offered the safety we imagined. It is time to live the what is. It is time to live in resonance with our soul’s calling, to the voice within that must be heard, that must be set free into the world to create a new resonance, a new paradigm that sustains us as we express the gifts we carry inside. We are born Knowing, we hold lifetimes of earned wisdom, of lived experience. It is time to resurrect ourselves into our Sovereignty, in Sacred Union within so we may live in harmony and community. As within, so without. As above, so below. Be fearless. Do the unexpected. Answer the call of your Soul. Let it lead you home. Blessed be.