Uncle Mason has lost his chill.

This week's episode brought to you by Goldfrapp.

♫ I see a bad moon rising / I see Uncle Mason on the way / I see crossbows a-firing / I see Matt Donovan acting like a shitbag again today / Don't go round the old Lockwood ruins tonight / It's bound to take your life / There's a bad moon on the rise ♫

One of the Salvatore brothers' stupidest plans doesn't end very well for a carnie, and the Lockwood family may all be spidermen.

Katherine's back and in the mood for stabbing!

It's finally Founder's Day and everybody wants to murder each other.

Elena meets her birth mom and Beth and Claire reveal their drag names.

Stefan is feeling his Angel fantasy while Uncle John Gilbert makes a play for the title of Worst Character.

Nothing like a pageant to serve as a backdrop for a man's addiction storyline...

Much like Stefan, we had a little trouble keeping things under control this week. We blame special guest Rose.