The Vine Donkey Kong Audio Programme

The cast continues their universe-hopping tomfoolery with a stop-off in an underground mobile alien fortress inhabitated by a feudal Japanese ninja tribe. Makes sense, right? Unfortunately, the alien-partnered feudal Japanese ninja tribe doesn't see it that way, and it leads to Chad and Hyle getting tortured in the worst way ever devised by man. Before that, however, they have an all-important discussion concerning the possibility of a Camelot-developed Donkey Kong game and Banjo characters in Minecraft! Their circumstances also make them ponder a mutant freak in Obscure Character Showcase!

Afterwards, the cast helps one of their listeners straighten his cluttered love in Men Are From Treehouses, Women Are From Save Points! However, can they resolve tensions amongst themselves, or will it take a new Master Debater to mend the brewing racial cold war? Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall of sound!

Of course, it wouldn't be The Vine if there weren't life-and-death consequences at stake, and this episode is no different. Will humanity be enslaved by invaders from an alternate dimension... or will they find saviors from the sewer? Order some pizza while you can, because Obamacare is about to price it right out of your budget for some reason.

Showrunners/Editors: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna, Alastair Craig

Hosts: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna

Special Thanks: Alastair Craig, Janell McCanna, Ben Kosmina, Scraps69, Scraps' Girlfriend

Music: Alastair Craig, Jeremy Thorn

©2012 File Two Productions

www.dkvine.com

After leaving the secret agent universe, it would take a mean feat to top the excitement and intrigue that the gang experienced. Eh, the hell with that. We're doing an '80s high school movie universe instead.

Even with the (seemingly) drab circumstances, there's still plenty of riveting Donkey Kong Universe discussion to be had! Chad and Hyle dissect Mario Party 9, Mario Tennis Open, and Donkey Kong 3D rumors in their trademark "too hot for TV" (because nobody will hire them for TV) style! Then, they take a look back at their own tragic school experiences in the first installment of Precious Memories! If that's not depressing enough, your own self-esteem will take a hit when they reflect on the biggest bully in the Donkey Kong Universe in Obscure Character Showcase!

After BIDET goes around the bend a bit, they talk about a game that's similar to the DKU in If You Like The DKU! Then, inspired by their setting, Professor Slush calls for a history lesson on the decades before Donkey Kong Country! But will any knowledge learned be enough to escape... Friday night detention?

Showrunners/Editors: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna, Alastair Craig

Hosts: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna

Special Thanks: Janell McCanna, Matt Cornah, Jeff Onan, Ben Sciortino

Music: Alastair Craig, Jeremy Thorn

©2012 File Two Productions

www.dkvine.com

Our intrepid Vine crew finds itself universe hopping out of the frying pan, and smack in the middle of a universe ripe with espionage, intrigue, and rampant womanizing. While Janell recouperates from her probably life-threatening wounds, Hyle, Chad, and their robot pal BIDET-52 wax philosophical over a Diddy Kong Pilot alpha build in a round of Game Discussion.

Upon Janell's return, the group educates a newfound ally in the ways of the DKU via Jaynell Walking, prepping him for a dangerous mission. Once he's off, the quartet has no choice but to take a call for relationship advice in that old standby, Men Are From Treehouses, Women Are From Save Points. It doesn't go well.

But once the mission is underway, nothing can stop the momentum! That is, except a spirited conversation to determine the true fate of Rare, via that old stalwart Master Debater. It all ends in a finale so action packed, so panty-moisteningly debonair, you'll want to listen with a watered-down martini and won't even care.

Showrunners/Editors: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna, Alastair Craig

Hosts: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna

Special Thanks: Janell McCanna, Karla Gurney

Music: Alastair Craig, Jeremy Thorn

©2012 File Two Productions

www.dkvine.com

Last time, after escaping the Mushroom Universe, the fate of our cast was left up in the air. Were they to return home, or find themselves in yet another creepy world? Well, we're not going to spoil it here, but you can bet that the answer will have frightening consequences.

In this very spooky episode, the streets are deserted. Not a soul is around. Of course, that means it's the perfect chance to talk about Donkey Kong! Specifically, a look at some Dead Games that have recently found a return from the grave! Then, it's a direct spotlight on everyone's favorite non-crocodile, non-Blackeye pirate in an Obscure Character Showcase! What of the sexual relations that exist between the here and the hereafter? Why, we better head to The Jungle Shore! Finally, bloodshed breaks out over a very particular form of enemy seen through the Donkey Kong Universe, and it can only be satiated in Master Debater!

Elsewhere, Alastair continues his journey to find his lost friends... with bone-chilling results! Shivers will run down your spine as he bones up on geography, haunting new locations and digging up...

Ugh. It's Halloween, see.

Showrunners/Editors: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna, Alastair Craig

Hosts: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna

Special Thanks: Janell McCanna, Robin Gibbons, Steve Gibbons, Jeremy Thorn, Andrew Buchanan

Music: Jeremy Thorn

©2011 File Two Productions

www.dkvine.com

With our hosts still stranded in the Mushroom Universe, they continue their tour of the Mario series by spinning their wheels, both figuratively and literally, with a healthy dose of Mario Kart discussion! The first lap is a look at the upcoming Mario Kart 7, with both Chad and Hyle analyzing videos you've already watched months ago! Then, Janell pulls into their lane with her brand new segment, Cake Bakin', Love Makin'!

However, just when their cruise control is set with this status quo, their plans quickly hydroplane when a new driver enters the race. Will this mysterious character threaten to dismantle The Vine crew and send them to the scrap heap? If so, they better get another Obscure Character Showcase out of their inventory drawer... er, glove compartment... before it's too late!

On the final lap, it's a race against time with yet another new segment. You better bring the lube in a jiffy, because they're calling it Master Debater! Sit tight and buckle up, because this episode is riding in the HOV lane whether it has two passengers or not! And it does.

Showrunners/Editors: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna, Alastair Craig

Hosts: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna

Special Thanks: Janell McCanna, Alastair Craig, Anne-Gaelle Craig, Ben Kosmina, Matt/Waddle

Music: Jeremy Thorn

©2011 File Two Productions

www.dkvine.com

All right, hi, Paisanos! It's time for the second season premiere of The Vine! Hyle and Chad kick things off by establishing the status quo after a nine-month hiatus, guaranteeing more fun than a barrel of Chained Kongs! They begin by discussing Upcoming Games, with a particular focus on the impending output for the Nintendo 3DS. The always-effervescent Janell stops by with her signature in-game sexpose, which threatens more than once to derail into a discussion on internet bestiality. Chad and Janell take diligent notes during one of Hyle's Continuity Corners, and Jeremy berates yet another hapless forum-goer into submission during an energetic round of Trivia!

The show is capped off with a brand new segment, The Royal Flush Brigade, five minutes so epic, it would be absolutely tragic if it were somehow interrupted for the listener by a trans-spatial glimpse into, say, Alastair and Ben's lives. Good god, that would be a hypothetical shame.

Cram in some earbuds, grab a slice of mushroom pizza, and kick back to enjoy The Vine: Season Two!

Showrunners/Editors: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna, Alastair Craig

Hosts: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna

Special Thanks: Janell McCanna, Jeremy Thorn, Mushroomhead, Ben Kosmina

Music: Jeremy Thorn

©2011 File Two Productions

www.dkvine.com

It's here, despite our every procrastination attempt - Scrambled Eggs, the long-delayed drunken live recording by half of The Vine cast! The proceedings are kicked off with a 20-minute explanation/apology by Chad McCanna and Hyle Russell, followed by the main event.

It's the night of Chad and Janell's wedding in New York City, and their noisy post-marital copulation is mistaken for a terrorist attack! Donald Rumsfeld is immediately dispatched, followed by a whole host of political figures, both living and dead. Naturally, a 90-minute orgy ensues. I wish this was a joke. It is not.

Scrambled Eggs is by far the most deserving of an EXPLICIT LYRICS "Tipper Sticker," although ironically, Tipper Gore is almost certainly a participant in this episode's festivities.

Hosts: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna

Special Thanks: Jeremy Thorn, Kayo Thorn, Preston Phillips, Eric Lambert

Music: Jeremy Thorn

©2011 File Two Productions

www.dkvine.com

Our merry band of reminisciers has returned, this time with over two hours of insight into the back-half of The Vine's first season. Join Chad, Hyle, Alastair, and special drop-in guest Janell (with a brand new surname!) as they explore the behind-the-scenes process from Episodes 106 - 110.

A fair bit of meandering is done to get to the conversational finish-line, but we wouldn't have it any other way. And neither will you... because you have absolutely no say in the matter.

Hosts: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna

Special Thanks: Alastair Craig, Janell McCanna

Music: Jeremy Thorn

©2011 File Two Productions

www.dkvine.com

Season One of The Vine Donkey Kong Audio Programme has come and gone, and we only thought it befitting of our collective ego to sit down for a retrospective. First on the chopping block is Part One of our first season retrospective. Hosts Hyle Russell and Chad McCanna sit down with the shockingly well-mannered Alastair Craig and shockingly ill-livered Jeremy Thorn for a look back at the season's first five episodes. This is a candid, out-of-character discussion and should not be considered within the established canon of The Vine itself.

WARNING: Digressions on the subject of Nazi swamp creatures occur within the first five minutes, and really, where can you go from that?

Hosts: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna

Special Thanks: Alastair Craig, Jeremy Thorn

Music: Jeremy Thorn

©2011 File Two Productions

www.dkvine.com

This is it! It's the epic first season finale of The Vine, but will it also be the last? The previous nine episodes have been building to this: A climactic showdown between man, ape, crocodile, vampire, and werewolf-cat. There may be a koala and some parrots in there too, but we haven't double checked.

Chad and Hyle still discuss Donkey Kong Country Returns and Retro Gamer, but can Chad overcome his own impotent nature and rescue Janell from certain death at the scales of the Khrushchev Klan? Will another edition of Jay-nell Walking possibly play into that? What exactly are the machinations of the newly-anointed Emperor Ben Kosmina and Shigeru Miyamoto, and will Jeremy stand for them? Is Alastair truly the Messiah of Ook Ook Island, and, if so, is a crucifixion in order, or did I just spin a cruci-fiction?

It all comes to a bloody head with the largest naval battle ever recorded in a video game-related podcast. Heroes will live. Heroes will die. And The Vine will never be the same.

Hosts: Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna

Special Thanks: Alastair Craig, Jeremy Thorn, Janell Gibbons, Ben Kosmina, Andrey Summers, Andrew Buchanan, Mushroom Head, J.R. Stone

Post Production: Alastair Craig, Hyle Russell, Chad McCanna

Music: Jeremy Thorn, Alastair Craig

©2011 File Two Productions

www.dkvine.com