#91: "You see, God gave men both a brain and a penis…but only enough blood to run one at a time."

• Robin Williams

While this is hilarious – and there's certainly plenty of evidence to support this from parts of my life – it also serves to perpetuate an antiquated social narrative that hurts both men and women:

When it comes to sex, men have no agency and are dragged around by the whims of their dick.

I'm here to tell you that's bullshit.

There's incredible intelligence in the brain between your legs, if you're willing to listen.

Today, I share a deeply personal story from my sex life (gulp) where I didn't listen, and how it led me to an experience where I felt violated and sick to my stomach.

AND, how that experience taught me a newfound respect for my body, my boundaries and my sexual well-being.

-DQ