The Working Mom’s Guide To Sanity

Dr. Taryn Marie Stejskal is the Founder and Chief Resilience Officer of the Resilience Leadership Institute and is recognized as the #1 international expert on resilience, mental health, and well-being in both leadership and life.

In this episode, we discuss her new WSJ Bestselling Book, “The Five Practices of Highly Resilient People: Why Some Flourish When Others Fold”, where Dr. Taryn explores how resilience is the key to individual, team, and organizational growth and acceleration across the globe

Show Notes

((02:46) It's OK to not be OK

(05:28) Is it OK to let your kids see you're experiencing negative emotions?

(09:34) Healing childhood wounds and letting go of resentment

(12:53) It can be very helpful to reframe your traumas as character-building experiences

(16:50) Vulnerability can be an asset in the C-suite and in life

(20:56) What level of awareness should children have about your relationship with your partner?

(24:25) Marriage and divorce during the pandemic

(28:53) How much vulnerability can we show at work?

(33:47) We don't owe an explanation to anybody

(35:48) Self-doubt

(39:19) Concluding remarks

Taryn’s links:

Website: https://www.resilience-leadership.com/

IG @drtarynmarie

Books: 5 Practices of Highly Resilient People

Eve Rodsky transformed a “blueberries breakdown” into a catalyst for social change when she applied her Harvard-trained background in organizational management to ask the simple yet profound question: What would happen if we treated our homes as our most important organizations?

Her New York Times bestselling book and Reese’s Book Club Pick, Fair Play, a gamified life-management system that helps partners rebalance their domestic workload and reimagine their relationship, has elevated the cultural conversation about the value of unpaid labor and care.

In this episode we discuss her highly anticipated follow-up, Find Your Unicorn Space: Reclaim Your Creative Life in a Too-Busy World, where Rodsky explores the cross-section between the science of creativity, productivity, and resilience.

Show Notes

(01:48) Introduction to Eve and Finding Your Unicorn Space

(12:33) Who’s putting the pressure on us? Ourselves or Society?

(14:52) The perceived value of men’s time vs women's- diamonds and sand

(18:13) Your kids are watching, so set an example of how to treat yourself with respect

(23:59) The importance of having creative outlets just for your own sake

(27:13) Start where you feel like you're lacking the most

(29:27) Homework assignment

Eve’s links:

Website: fairplaylife.com & everodsky.com

IG @everodsky

Books: Find Your Unicorn Space

Research has shown that the average employee spends nearly 2.5 hours per day in drama – gossiping, tattling, withholding buy-in, resisting change, and stepping down from accountability.

Drama is emotional waste – any unproductive thought or behavior – and like any other waste in the workplace, Cy believes drama can be eliminated through great mental processes, and that’s why her work is focused on giving leaders tools to recapture that emotional waste and upcycle it into results.

In this episode, Cy and I chat about working mom guilt, workplace politics, judgment, competition, and how to let all of that drama go.

Show Notes

(02:32) The limits of people-pleasing: How Cy was surprised by her performance review

(09:43) Are women harassed by unfair grading systems?

(16:45) Are you willing to have people be wrong about you so that you can live the life you want to live?

(20:33) "Skilling up" your kids

(22:59) Cy shares a story of being healed through alternate states of consciousness

(28:30) Your childhood stories of trauma may not be as important as you believe them to be

(30:31) Mom competition is soul-crushing

(31:42) There are only two types of actions: acts of love, and cries FOR love

(33:06) Why we tend to outsource our self-love to external people

(38:26) How we can stop transferring our anxiety onto others

(42:00) Life can be a lot bigger than whatever pain you are in now: Cy's 3-word thought experiment

(44:01) Why our ego wants us to be a victim

Cy’s links:

Website: https://realitybasedleadership.com/

IG: @CyWakeman

YouTube: @CyWakeman

Books:

Life’s Messy, Live Happy

No Ego

Reality-Based Leadership

The Reality-Based Rule of the Workplace

KUTE BLACKSON is a beloved inspirational speaker and transformational teacher. He speaks at countless events he organizes around the world as well as at outside events including A-Fest, YPO (Young Presidents’ Organization), and EO (Entrepreneurs’ Organization)

In this episode, Kute and I chat about his simple mission—to awaken and inspire people across the planet to access inner freedom, live authentically, and fulfill their true life’s purpose.

Show Notes

(02:22) What is the difference between surrendering and succumbing?

(04:27) Many well-known and successful people have also surrendered

(07:11) Why one should not confuse surrender with laziness

(13:01) To truly surrender, one must go through grieving

(14:49) Some of us have not allowed ourselves to grieve unrealized dreams

(16:22) The greatest gift parents can give their children is a healed consciousness

(20:09) Children will pick up on your unresolved traumas, it is therefore crucial that they are dealt with

(24:52) Children are able to pick up on things even if they remain unspoken

(26:21) There is no reason to hold off introducing your kids to spiritual practices early on

(28:01) Kute's train station story or how to make the most of suffering

Kute’s links:

Website: kuteblackson.com

IG @kuteblackson

Books: The Magic of Surrender

Rose Hackman’s research and writings about “emotional labor”, an invisible, devalued, feminized, and yet essential form of work — seeks to drastically reframe our view of women, work, and the nature of persistent inequality.

In this episode, Rose and I chat about how to increase your awareness of emotional labor, offload some of it, and what role men play in it.

Show Notes

(02:35) Defining emotional labor

(05:50) Breaking down examples of emotional labor

(09:31) The burden of pretending to be authentic

(12:02) What about the men? Men and emotional labor

(15:53) Self-imposed obligations and creating space for your partner to step in

(20:07) Understanding the dynamics between masculine and feminine energy

(24:14) Gender roles have evolved in the context of modern times

(24:59) Some practical solutions for bridging the gap

(28:32) The consequences of dropping emotional labor at work

(31:02) The phenomenon of revenge time

Rose’s links:

Website: rosehackman.com

IG @rose.hackwoman

Books: Emotional Labor

Most employers wish their employees cared about the business as much as they do.

Most employees wish their employers cared about them as much as they care about the business. There’s a disconnect when employers think about their employees but fail to show, tell, and demonstrate they care.

Never Lose an Employee Again provides leaders at all management levels, across all industries, the tools they need to design impactful experiences and interactions across the eight phases of the employee journey.

In this episode, Joey and I chat about how to be a self-advocate, if going back to the office is really what’s best for productivity, and how to be a leader people want to follow.

Show Notes

(02:44) The Great Resignation and work post-COVID

(05:00) We can't put the WFH genie back in the bottle - or can we?

(08:32) Was leadership was already missing from offices pre-2019

(11:25) Do you have to judge employees as individuals?

(16:05) Why we are becoming not only location-independent but also time-independent

(20:26) Working parents stand to gain a lot from being able to work from home

(26:23) Negotiation for adequate compensation

(30:47) Why negotiating yourself is on YOU not your boss

(36:57) Some ideas to bring to your employer for improving your working conditions

(41:32) Joey's advice for employees and employers is applicable elsewhere too

Joey’s links:

Website: joeycoleman.com

Books: Never Lose an Employee again – Never Lose a Customer Again

Caroline Stanbury is a name synonymous with luxury, The Real Housewives of Dubai, and everything pink and fabulous.

But, I know a different side of Caroline and it was exciting to pull that side forward in this episode.

Caroline has a fiery entrepreneurial spirit, and business-oriented mind, and great spiritual depth.

In this episode, we had a long over-due girl chat about her path to success, how to fight back when you’re backed into a corner, and how we can constantly be “pitching ourselves”.

Show Notes

(03:07) Caroline is forever pitching herself

(05:53) To have options in life, you need multiple streams of income

(06:13) The importance of following your calling and facing insecurities

(10:50) Nothing is forever, and it is important to learn how to pivot

(12:04) Coming from more humble beginnings

(13:57) Sometimes things NOT manifesting can actually be good

(18:30) Dealing with resistance and difficult people

(21:31) It's possible to get a new lease on life in your 40s and beyond

(26:23) Always bet on yourself

(28:30) What’s the BIG dream for Caroline?

Caroline’s links:

Website: carolinestanbury.com

IG:  @ carolinestanbury and @divorcednotdeadpodcast

Podcast: Divorced Not Dead

Does sex with your partner feel like just another thing on your to-do list?

Is it possible to reignite the spark in your marriage?

In this episode, I welcome Kate Balestrieri— founder of Modern Intimacy, sex therapist, and a licensed psychologist and we talk about IT ALL.

Everything from emotional labor to how being a parent has the potential to crush your sex life.

Show Notes

(02:16) How Kate became a sex therapist

(04:47) For many working women, sex can become a chore

(06:41) What is the third shift aka emotional labor

(08:46) Women tend to pressure themselves

(12:49) Your sex life when there are kids in the house all the time

(16:02) Initiating sex when people are stressed

(21:31) Receiving compliments at the wrong moment

(24:01) Should every couple look into therapy and sex therapy in particular?

(24:50) Isolation as a coping mechanism for men

(28:01) Why a lot of women struggle with feeling genuinely sexy

(32:32) Kate’s take on Sleep Divorces

Kate’s links:

Website: Modern Intimacy

IG:  @themodernintimacy and @drkatebalestrieri

Podcast: Get Naked with Dr. Kate

Millennials lead the ‘sleep divorce’ trend. Do you need one?

It's a distressing phenomenon that haunts my nights: the "sleep divorce." When you're married or living with your partner, the act of "going to bed" can either be a serene conclusion to the day or an endless loop of Groundhog Night, plagued by the torment of counting sheep.

According to a survey from the American Academy of Sleep Medicine (AASM), a third of cohabitating adults have filed for “sleep divorce.”

These couples now get their shut-eye in separate beds. They sleep apart to stay together.

In this episode, I talk about why it's important to evaluate for yourself.

Can affirmations help you overcome addictions?

Can you rewire your brain with affirmations?

That is what author Erica Spiegelman and I discuss in this episode.

Erica Spiegelman is a wellness specialist, recovery counselor, wellness media contributor, and author of the new book 101 Affirmations for Addiction & Recovery: A Practical Guide for Self-Empowerment, a collection of recovery-focused affirmations designed to provide a framework for developing positive self-talk habits.

Show Notes

(02:07) Erica’s Journey: struggles with alcohol led her to find healthy solitude and affirmations

(05:30) Rewiring your brain if it's been taken hostage by bad habits

(07:45) Becoming your own biggest champion by listening to your soul voice and using correct affirmations

(10:37) Future generations could make use of tools of affirmation for better mental health

(13:22) How to become more aware of how negative our self-talk is and rewire it

(15:23) The detrimental effects of social media on your mindset, anxiety levels and self-image

(19:10) Self-care or is it a distraction?

(22:59) Closing thoughts and further resources

Erica’s links:

Website: ericaspiegelman.com

Books: Get Erica's Books

IG: ericaspiegelman