This ExtraOrdinary Life

Kevin Monroe met Chris Chancey seven years ago and they kept in touch. Two years ago Kevin visited Chris’ company Amplio and immediately knew that a conversation would happen in due course. Chris’ recently released book - Refugee Workforce: The Economic Case for Hiring the Displaced - provided the opportunity for Chris’ appearance on this week’s show.

About the BookThe book highlights the lessons Chris learned from five years of working with companies in manufacturing, construction, and hospitality, to fill their labor shortage with a dependable refugee workforce.  Chris says that over seven million jobs will go unfilled in 2019, mostly in those three categories.

What Refugees Really WantWe often stereotype refugees in two ways:  we either think of them as charity cases that we need to provide for, or we consider them a terrorist threat that we need to be wary of. On the contrary, Chris says, refugees want to contribute, they want to pay taxes, they want to use their skills and time to provide for their families. They want to be seen as people who have value. The average length of time for a refugee to be in a refugee camp is 10 years. They’re not allowed to work while they’re there. Chris sees this as wasted potential since these are the prime years of their working lives. When they do get an opportunity to work, they have a hunger to prove themselves.

ShalomKevin asked Chris to talk about the win-win-win opportunity Amplio is helping businesses discover. Chris responds that we have persons with strong motivation to work, for whom drug abuse is not an issue, and who are legal to work in the US. Amplio matches them with companies that have open positions. Very quickly they started seeing the true impact of engaging the refugee workforce at companies:Increase in retention:  the industry standard in manufacturing is 40%.  With refugees, the retention rate is 80%.Increase in productivity: Refugees are highly motivated to work so they can provide better for their families.Increase in profits: with higher productivity comes increased profits.It's a win for the refugee, it's a win for the employer, and it's a win for Amplio, being the one making that relationship happen. Kevin calls this win-win-win state Shalom, as it’s the right order in all relationships.

A Challenge for ListenersChris throws out a challenge to listeners, which Kevin endorses: Let your table be filled with people not like you. He invites you to find someone from a different background or culture, and engage with them in deep, meaningful conversation. He promises that you'll come away with insights and perspectives that you didn't have before.

ResourcesLearn more about the bookAmplio Recruiting [email protected]Phone: 678-744-5111

Host Kevin Monroe welcomes back his guest from episode 57, author Oscar Trimboli, to continue their conversation about deep listening. They talk about the cost of not listening, listening villains and how to overcome distraction.

This is the Century of ListeningKevin recalls a statement that Oscar made in episode 57: “The biggest productivity gains for leaders and systems is by listening more, not learning to speak more effectively. We spent the last century learning how to speak. We'll spend the 21st century learning how to listen.” Oscar says that we are going back to our storytelling traditions, and there will also be a correspondent focus on improving our listening skills. Stories are a great way to teach children to listen.

The Cost of Not ListeningKevin estimates that the cost of not listening is about $73 billion per year. In some notable crises in recent history, it took people outside of the system who were listening, to point out the impending disaster. Sadly, they were ridiculed at the time. Oscar points out that we find it difficult to pay attention to people who are different because we’re listening to prove them wrong. When you find yourself violently disagreeing with someone, he says, ask yourself which of your assumptions could be false, and what could you learn from that person. That is listening on a deeper level.

The Math of ListeningEric explains the 125/400 and the 125/900 rules and how they keep us from listening well. He describes a good listener as one who helps the speaker to discover their own meaning.

Listening VillainsMost people think they are better listeners than they are. Oscar helps people in the workplace discover which of the 4 listening villains they actually are:The shrewd listener, who pretends they're listening but actually thinks they’re smarter than the speaker;The interrupting listener, who just wants the speaker to get to the point;The lost listener, who is stuck in his own head; orThe dramatic listener, who always has a bigger, better story.

Overcome DistractionKevin shares a simple practice from Oscar’s book that helps him overcome distraction to listen better. That practice is simply to pause for a moment and breathe. Oscar says that putting your phone into flight mode and drinking a glass of water are other simple steps you can take. He finds that these simple practices have a big impact on business: meetings start earlier and end sooner, projects come in under budget, customers are happier, and employees stay with the company longer.

Join the Listening ChallengeKevin and Oscar invite you to join them in the Listening Challenge. It's an opportunity for you to discover your listening villain, remove distractions and become comfortable with silence. You can enroll at ListeningChallenge.com.

ResourcesOscar’s book: Deep Listening - Impact Beyond Words Join the Listening Challenge [email protected]Phone: 678-744-5111

High-performance Culture Coach, David McGlennen, is the guest on the Higher Purpose Podcast this week. He chats with Kevin Monroe about the rhythms of life and how to become a world-class organization.

The Rhythms of Life David recognizes that life has rhythms that are very much like the seasons. There is a time to prepare, a time to bloom, a time for blooming to end and to prepare for winter, and a time to go deep and grow. Kevin concurs and adds that there is also a rhythm to the day. When we find and follow the flow of the daily rhythm, beautiful things happen.

World-class by Design In every organization, there are success behaviors that lead to high performance. When we help people reach their fullest potential, we're actually helping our company to develop: high performance and being people-centered and not mutually exclusive, David says. He helps companies be intentional about creating a world-class culture. He states that a good company has a good culture by default, but a world-class company has a world-class culture by design. Culture is what we actually see as behaviors in an organization. It is either desired and led intentionally or it’s what is allowed to transpire.

Traits of a World-class Organization World-class organizations intentionally develop the rhythms, disciplines, and processes necessary to be high performance. We see it in their attention to detail and how they are purposeful about everything they do. David calls this playing like a champion: it's doing the things that matter most to people on a daily basis, over and over again, no matter how boring it gets. He stresses that it's important for leaders to step back from the business for a moment and define the behaviors that would lead to success. What does it look like to them to be world-class? What are the small behaviors that would make a difference?

World-class Performance Begins With Purpose David says that most people want to do their best. In order for them to perform at their best, however, we have to be able to align them with their purpose. If leaders develop their people, they will, in turn, bring all their skills and talents to the business to the benefit of both parties. Developing people is the groundwork for a culture that is magnetizing. Give people the opportunity to see their full potential, and believe in them, David advises. Leaders should be intentional about helping align their people with their purpose. If we’re on purpose, we're going to serve and impact more people and more lives, he says.

Resources David McGlennen on LinkedIn Email: [email protected]  Be The Leader Podcast on Youtube  [email protected] Phone: 678-744-5111

Devin Halliday recently emailed his subscribers to announce the release of his new book, The Belonging Factor. Since Kevin Monroe couldn’t remember signing up for the list, he replied to Devin’s email explaining that he was unsubscribing on principle. Devin immediately felt that he had broken trust and he immediately emailed back Kevin to express regret and hope that he could earn back his trust in time. That interaction eventually led to today’s show. Kevin and Devin chat about finding your tribe, the belonging deficit and its effects, and how leaders can create an environment where people feel like they fit in.

Finding Your TribeWe’re all looking for our tribe, Devin says. He relates how he came to realize that it was his responsibility as a leader to create an environment where his team could feel a sense of trust, connection, and cooperation. By creating a team with this dynamic, you're creating a culture where people can truly feel like they belong. 

The Belonging DeficitIt's tragic that many people experience a belonging deficit, Kevin says. Devin explains that  social media in particular exposes this. When we post on social media and many people like our post - ironically, most of whom we have no real-life relationship with - we experience a quick dopamine response from feeling we belong. This dopamine fix goes away quickly and the belonging deficit returns, so we post again and again. In the workplace, the belonging deficit manifests itself in 3 major areas:Misalignment between your personal values and the organization’s values - if the organization’s values are not lived by leaders, or employees are not allowed to fulfill these values, they start to question whether they belong. Ultimately the cost to the organization is the repeated loss of its highest-performing talent.Misalignment with your direct leader -  when you don't believe you have trust from your leader, or you're unable to express your voice or share constructive dissent, you feel a growing dislike for your job.Misalignment with your team - this can usually show up in teams that are focusing on diversity just to fulfill a metric. Without the right leadership, the team will be unable to innovate or communicate, and members would feel that they don't belong there. 

5 Key CharacteristicsDevin describes five characteristics shared amongst brands and leaders that when replicated, have a tremendous impact on creating a sense of belonging.

How Leaders Can Create an Environment of BelongingBelonging is feeling permission to show up as yourself, Devin says.  Leaders can create an environment of belonging by:Being an ally and advocate four people in a different position than themselves;Making sure they have clearly defined the organization’s values, culture, and roles and behaviors;Modeling what's expected by being transparent.If you aspire for great impact, be the leader who is taking the appropriate actions and live the values. Devin admonishes, choose the challenge of struggle because it's that path that's going to lead you to exactly the outcome you want to achieve. 

ResourcesWin one of 2 free autographed copies of Devin’s book: HigherPurpose.BelongingFactor.comEmail Devin: [email protected]Website: devinhalliday.com [email protected]Phone: 678-744-5111

At the start of her career as a 4th-grade teacher, Melissa Hughes was tasked with teaching children how to learn, but she had never herself been taught how the brain works. Today, as a neuroscience expert, author and speaker, she finds that we all want to learn how to make our brain work better. She joins host Kevin Monroe in a lively discussion about the neuroscience of purpose on this week’s show.

Psychological Numbing Melissa posted a video about psychological numbing on LinkedIn that caught Kevin's attention. He asks Melissa to describe psychological numbing and the effect it has on us. She explains, when something tragic happens over and over, we feel the emotional magnitude of it less and less. It's not that we don't care; but the more we are exposed to bad stimuli, the more desensitized we get. Sadly, as the number of victims in a tragedy increases, our empathy or willingness to do something decreases, because we feel like there is nothing we can do.

Start With One When it comes to tragedies, big numbers are really abstract but one is a real person. Melissa says that fighting psychological numbness takes intention. The answer is to look for one person and make a difference in his or her life. Kevin adds that this one intentional act of kindness creates a ripple effect.

The Neuroscience of Purpose We are much more positive and engaged when we have a purpose, Melissa says. It's a myth that we want everything to be easy; the human brain likes a challenge but it needs to matter to us. We find joy when we are in a place where we can be both challenged and positive. When we live a purposeful life, the limbic system produces more happy chemicals - oxytocin, serotonin and dopamine - instead of cortisol, the stress hormone. Understanding why it’s important to increase these happy hormones intensifies their benefits to us.

Make Gratitude Part of Your Routine Gratitude works the same way as the happy hormones: the more you do it, the more you benefit. In fact, the best way to get out of a negative feedback loop is to intentionally break it with gratitude. Melissa starts and ends her day by writing in her gratitude journal. Doing so sets her up for a successful day. When you envision yourself being successful, she says, you alert your reticular activation system, also known as the brain’s bouncer, to let in any opportunity that will help you reach your goal. At the end of the day, think of one thing that you are grateful for. You will feel more empowered and more empathetic towards others. We are in much more control of our brains than we think.

Resources Subscribe to Neuroscience NuggetMelissa’s book: Happy Hour With EinsteinJoin the Gratitude Challenge[email protected]Phone: 678-744-5111

Jonathan Raymond is the author of Good Authority: How to Become the Leader Your Team is Waiting For. He chats with host Kevin Monroe about his leadership journey and the core principles he discovered along the way.

The Value of a LeaderLeaders commonly internalize the destructive notion that they need to have all the answers and solve all the problems in the company. In fact, we attach our sense of value to this idea, Jonathan says. This causes lots of problems at work. When it comes to the people part of leadership, a leader’s job is to ask good questions, to get answers you may not even think about. Rather than conducting meetings and presentations, have 1-on-1 conversations and listen actively.

Jonathan’s Journey Into Good AuthorityJonathan shares his gradual journey to becoming a good leader. He describes the moment he realized that things needed to change, and the steps he took from there. His wife asked him a question that would become the cornerstone of his life from that moment: what if professional and personal growth were two separate paths, but one journey? He now sees his life at work as daily opportunities for personal growth.

What is Good Authority?Good authority is not command and control, as it has been historically accepted. It is also not no authority or hierarchy at all. Good authority is acknowledging and embracing that I am in a position of authority and that I use it respectfully and with two-way dialogue.

3 Core PrinciplesKevin asks Jonathan to define the 3 core principles discussed in his book. Jonathan discusses these ideas:The deepest purpose of a business is to change the lives of the people who work there.The role of leaders and managers is to show people that personal and professional growth are inseparable.If you want people to be more engaged, you’ve got to be more engaged with them.

More Yoda, Less SupermanSuperman’s whole identity is wrapped up in saving the day. He never mentored anyone. He was focused on solving all the problems on his own. By contrast, Yoda was invested in helping Luke to become the best version of himself. He asked Luke difficult questions, informative moments to empower him to self-reflect and make difficult decisions, instead of holding his hand at every step. Jonathan believes that the future of work is to give people more Yoda; in other words, a pathway to self-discovery and self-actualization.

ResourcesFind Jonathan at Refound.comEmail: [email protected] Book: Good Authority[email protected]: 678-744-5111

Podcaster and author, Heather Younger joins Kevin Monroe to talk about how to move forward after adversity. Heather spoke at the TedX Colorado Springs event recently. She unpacks how adversity led to her purpose and how she helps others to reframe their adversity.

How Adversity Led to PurposeHeather feels depleted by all the negative news in our society. She remarks that we have turned into a society of being victims. By contrast, she chose to use the adversity she faced early in life as fuel to do what she was called to do. She is driven to help others move forward because there is so much more to all of us than any of us know. She feels that God created her to do exactly what she is doing today. “I can't even be me if I'm not doing what I'm doing,” she says.

Heather’s North StarsThere are many guiding principles Heather lives by. She calls them North Stars. Two of her favorites are: End strong, never end weak. Uplift others always.She comments that she came by these principles through her life experiences. It all started from the adversity: I am the person I am today because of my adversity, not in spite of it, Heather explains. 

How to Reframe AdversityWhen something bad happens, we each have a natural proclivity to either fight, flee or freeze. The first step in reframing is to allow the natural emotions to roll over you. However, there is a cut-off time: you don’t stay in that emotional mode forever. You move on to step 2 in reframing, which is to rethink that event or situation in a way that allows you to grow and move forward. Heather says that there are many ways to rethink what’s happening to us. Asking yourself questions such as “what did I learn from that? What can I do now because of this?” can help us see new possibilities. This same reframing process helps organizations and leaders to focus on rational ways they can impact the customer experience, rather than be discouraged by the things that are out of their control.

Reframing is Not Denying RealityKevin emphasizes the fact that reframing is not denying reality. It is letting reality sink in, but refusing to let it soak in for long periods of time. If you soak in it for too long you will wrinkle and shrink. Instead, focus on thoughts such as “what does this make possible? What's a different path forward?” If you think that there is only one path forward after a bad experience, that's being a victim. There is always more than one way to respond to any problem or dilemma.

Flip the SwitchA big part of personal, organizational and leadership effectiveness is to get a hold of your mind first. Once you discover what you can control after or in the midst of adversity, you feel a level of empowerment, like flipping a switch. 3 steps to start flipping the switch are:Step outside physically.Don’t soak in your adversity.Start imagining a new set of possibilities.

ResourcesHeather R. Younger on LinkedInTed TalkBook: The 7 Intuitive Laws of Employee Loyalty[email protected]Phone: 678-744-5111

The team at One Stone Creative introduced today’s guest, Mike Sipple Jr.  to host Kevin Monroe. Mike is the host of the Talent Magnet Institute Podcast, and the owner of a family business focused on helping organizations and leaders become talent magnets. Kevin and Mike meet up to chat about creating a culture of care at work and how to help people thrive.

Creating Cultures Where People ThriveOur duty as adults, Mike says, is to create environments where all people can thrive. This involves listening and creating empathy. He outlines 6 steps to help people thrive at work. Step 2 is to stop and evaluate your organization’s culture now, from the outside as well as the inside. He defines culture as the thousands of interactions that happen every day in your environment: the way people experience your culture, not the way you talk about it. In step 5 he advises to let TIP (Thoughtful, Intentional, Personal) guide your approach to employee development and retention.

What is Thriving?You can know that someone is thriving if they are innately happy in what they’re doing, when their work is contributing to the company's mission as well as their personal life. The better you understand their personal goals, the more you can understand their motives.

Would You Want to Work For You?The first step in evaluating your culture is to ask yourself, if you were interviewing with you, would you want to work here? Organizations and leaders who care about their people are crushing the competition: when you care about your people, others hear about it and want to work for your organization. Mike shares 3 ways you can evaluate your company culture. Kevin adds that another question to ask yourself is, would you want your children to work here? If the answer is no, Mike advises you to accept it and not excuse it. Be the change.

Caring is Good BusinessCaring about your people is the right thing to do but it also makes good business. Research on positive work cultures show a tangible financial impact, including a 400- 500% greater stock price value and greater ROI for those companies who invest in their people. Mike advises leaders to treat their people just like they treat their customers. Kevin adds that the customer experience will never be better than the employee experience.

Successful LeadersMike shares 4 characteristics of leaders who love well and who are not afraid to let their people know they care. These leaders are courageous, they believe that people are genuinely good, they care about those that struggle, and they are good communicators. Success in leadership is not just about work, Mike says. He asks leaders, do you have 3 a.m. friends? Would you want your kids to live like you? Real success is also about how you show up personally, in relationships as well as the community.

Resources MikeSipplejr.com Talent Magnet Institute PodcastKevin Monroe email: [email protected]Kevin Monroe phone: 1-678-744-5111One Stone Creative 

Kevin Monroe talks with Maryann Kerr, a consultant, and longtime listener and the Unofficial Sponsor of the Gratitude Challenge. They discuss gratitude, the cost of toxicity in the workplace, and how to have a purpose-powered reboot.

Gratitude Steve is grateful for Maryann and asks her to share why he dubbed her the Unofficial Sponsor of the Gratitude Challenge. Maryann explains that it was of the little thing she did by tagging Steve Foran in a post that Kevin had written on LinkedIn. Both men connected from that post which led to their collaboration. Kevin commented that a lot of the things we do are simple, but can be so significant. Actions do not have to be big to have significance.

What is Wrong With Me? Maryann posted on LinkedIn about how she had been fired 3 times in the last 9 years.  She says that she asked herself, why does this keep happening to me? What is wrong with me? The post generated lots of feedback, with many people telling her thanks because they could relate to what she wrote. She realized she wasn't showing the same kindness and compassion to herself that she showed to a complete stranger.

Shed the Guilt Kevin says that fear holds a lot of us back from starting over, mainly because of our responsibilities. The purpose of this podcast, Kevin says, is to help people feel free to start over, and to help them shed the guilt of doing so. Maryann adds that the most important questions to ask yourself are Who am I, What am I meant to do, and What might I have to give up to live my purpose?

Starting Over With Purpose Maryann’s purpose is bigger than herself: there are too many unhappy people in the workplace and her ‘empathy gene’ compels her to do something about it. She comments that if you want to lead your life, nothing is more important than knowing yourself really well.  Come at life from a position of strength, knowing what you're good at and what other people whom you admire, say they like about you. Build on your strengths just like elite athletes do. They focus most of their efforts on honing their strengths.

Toxicity at Work Causes Illness Kevin states that the stress and anxiety at work is the leading cause of chronic disease in North America. Maryann quotes the statistics of toxicity in the workplace and the impact it has on people’s lives. She concludes that if governments are trying to create more productive countries and companies, they could do so by investing in creating kinder, more collaborative, productive workplaces.

How to Have a Purpose-Powered Reboot Maryann outlines the three steps to take to give yourself a purpose-powered reboot, and shares some stories about how they can work for you.

There may be things we have to give up, but what we are getting in exchange for those tradeoffs is of far more value than what we are giving up. Energy that is directed from purpose is transformative. If you want to have a purpose-powered reboot Maryann advises you to be brave, be kind to yourself, and embrace the support of the people you love and trust the most. Most of all be grateful: if you can step back and look at all the things you're grateful for, it will remind you that you are living in an abundant place and that the world is full of hope and possibility and that we're all here to help one another.

Resources Maryann Kerr on LinkedIn 

This week Steve Foran is back on the Higher Purpose Podcast to talk with Kevin about one of their mutual favorite topics - gratitude. They debrief the 10-day gratitude challenges, and the impact they’ve had on people’s lives, and go on to talk about the greater impact of gratitude, and why it’s so critical in this day and age.

Debriefing the Gratitude Challenge The hypothesis was that in ten days we could move people from 0-10 in terms of surviving and thriving. The gratitude challenge was 10 days of emails to help people improve their gratitude. The hypothesis was proven right - the needle moved for many, many people, as proven by an avalanche of messages talking about the real, meaningful changes in their lives. The average self-reported change people experienced was a 46% improvement in how they felt. Steve points out that as more people take the challenge, this kind of data, and what it represents could be massively impactful.

What Happens When You Invite Gratitude In? Steve talks about some of the physical, neurological changes that happen when you’re focusing and prioritizing on gratitude. When stress is one of the leading causes of disease and unhappiness, gratitude is a simple, effective and accessible antidote to the chemicals caused by stress. The hormones that stress causes cannot be produced at the same time as the hormones caused by gratitude. Kevin talks about reading the Abundance Loop, which talks about how negative outcomes have happened when decisions are made on fear. The fix for that is, you guessed it - gratitude. Steve points out that we can be tempted to dismiss the power of gratitude because it is so simple.

Gratitude is Critical The average North American has the highest quality of life in recorded history. But happiness is not keeping up with the external indicators of happiness and comfort. Steve thinks that the negative is so easy to see, and humans have a tendency to notice and amplify the negative much more than the positive. Kevin and Steve talk about one particular challenge, and how the idea of turning lemons into lemonade can be a useful tool.

Breakthroughs Kevin had breakthroughs in gratitude and outlook - even as the host of the challenge! Gratitude is the gateway to improvements in all areas of your life. Steve compares it to brushing your teeth. It’s something to do every day. It shouldn’t be rote, and the 10-day challenges are a way to keep your gratitude practice fresh and engaging. Steve asks Kevin to talk a little bit about the change in outlook he had during the challenge. Ultimately, Kevin doesn’t believe they found the gratitude challenge - the challenge found them. Like most things in life, gratitude is better together than alone.

A Grateful Community The third gratitude challenge - new and improved! - is starting on August 12th. It is the foundation for an extraordinary life. Steve reminds the listeners that even if you’ve taken the first or second challenge - take the third one. There is always something more to learn and experience.

Kevin recalls the line from Steve’s book: “You are worthy and you have much to be grateful for.” Steve talks about what this means, and the way you can use the idea to keep yourself from living in the survival zone. We can all thrive.

Resources 

The Power of Gratitude with Steve Foran 

The Abundance Loop 

The Gratitude Challenge