The one thing most people fear more than death? Public speaking.¹

There’s something about standing in front of another person (or multiple people) and sharing our thoughts, ideas, and feedback that makes us want to shrink until we evaporate. But sometimes, neglecting to speak up for yourself can have harmful repercussions.

Here to help you see past your fear this week is Darlene Brock and Julie Bender, who get to work excavating the possible reasons why speaking up is so terrifying. Maybe you’ve often been ignored, or never taken seriously, or you feel you’ll come across as foolish (hello, imposter syndrome!). No matter the reason, one thing is for certain: there will be a void left by what you’re not saying.

Darlene and Julie discuss the myriad benefits of speaking up for yourself: setting critical boundaries; encouraging others; making life-changing connections; and more. When we choose to say what’s on our hearts and minds, even when it’s hard or we doubt ourselves, we’re affording those around us not only with new information to chew on, but a reminder of our presence and impact.

¹https://www.mentalhealth.com/library/what-we-fear-more-than-death 

“Someone not hearing you might say more about them as a listener than you as a speaker.” —Julie Bender

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How is your future looking right now? If what you’re envisioning feels bleak, let us offer some encouragement.

Hope often flies right out the door as soon as life starts to unravel differently than we planned. Your kids drop out of college. Your spouse is distant. You haven’t been promoted at work in years. When reality doesn’t match the vision, what can we look forward to?

In this episode of Smart Living in Small Bites, Darlene Brock and Julie Bender unpack ways to find hope in the mundane. It may require work on your end, like cutting back in certain areas to prioritize what’s needed to reach your goals. More often than not, holding on to hope simply calls for believing God’s promise in Jeremiah 29:11: “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

And if you’re wondering when God will come through, take comfort in knowing it’ll be in his timing—which means it has yet to happen and you already have something to hope for.

While you practice staying hopeful, meditate on this nugget of wisdom Darlene shares: “Hope doesn’t exist without deprivation, need and lack.” What we’re lacking now gives us a reason to look forward to our future with optimism and become better versions of ourselves along the way.

“When you’re at the end of your rope, tie a knot and hold on.” —Theodore Roosevelt

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You’ve dreamt of wearing a billowy white dress and floating down the aisle to your prince charming since you were 5. Fast forward several years, and the man you love is doing everything but committing to making that dream a reality. Maybe you’ve been dating for years and are losing hope that a proposal will ever come, or you are engaged, but his promise of marriage feels empty and conversations around setting a date have stalled out. What do you do?

In this episode of Smart Living with Grit and Grace, Darlene Brock and Julie Bender talk about the current cultural view of marriage and the difficulties you may face in broaching your situation with an eye for the truth. If there hasn’t been any movement forward with your boyfriend/fiance, Darlene and Julie provide a series of questions to ask yourself that will help you honestly assess the quality of your relationship and determine whether or not he’s comfortable in staying uncommitted. You’ll then learn how to confidently approach him with your concerns and make a decision on how you want to move forward, based on his response.

This has been one of the most-searched subject on the Grit and Grace Life website for years, so we have plenty of wise advice in this episode—and resources below—to help you make a decision on your future when your partner is dragging his feet.

“Is he as interested in what matters to you as you are in what matters to him?” —Darlene Brock

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Don’t know what to do for spring break? That means it’s time to decide how you really want to spend that time off: planning and prepping for a week-long getaway someplace far away, or catching your breath with a few relaxing days at home with your family?

If 2025 has been a busy year for you (or if saving money is top of mind), you’ll likely opt for the latter. But there’s no reason a staycation can’t be as inspired as a destination trip. In fact, there are ways to make it more wholesome than you might expect.

In this podcast episode of Smart Living with Grit and Grace, Darlene Brock and Julie Bender explain how a distraction-free staycation can strengthen your bond with your kids and keep them inspired. We’ll let you in on a little secret: You have to let them be bored. But don’t worry—Darlene and Julie list off more than a dozen memorable activities that will keep your kids entertained all day and maybe even spark a new hobby along the way.

Spend a little downtime at home or hit up some local attractions with these recommendations, and you’ll make this spring break one your kids will never forget.

“Seek to make memories, to strengthen your relationships, to put the distractions out and just focus on connecting with your kids.” —Julie Bender

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When we think of Valentine’s Day, our thoughts often gravitate toward images of men purchasing giant teddy bears and bouquets of roses for the woman they love. As nice as that is, it’s a bit commercialized, and love deserves so much more intention—and recipients!

Darlene Brock and Julie Bender want to challenge you to think outside the box this year. Who else can you show love to aside from your significant other? Your friends? Jesus? Maybe even yourself? In this podcast episode, Darlene and Julie share small yet touching ways you can let those special individuals in your life know just how much they mean to you—without paying top dollar for a Hallmark card.

“And above all these, put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.” —Colossians 3:14

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Has it been a while since you heard from God? Does it feel like ages since you’ve seen his goodness or felt the Holy Spirit stirring?

Distance from God is one of the most frustrating things we can experience as women of faith. We wonder where he’s gone and why he would ignore the children he loves. The uncomfortable truth? The onus may be on us—and if it’s not us, it’s God trying to help us grow in our faith. Yes, even in the ‘silence’!

In this podcast episode, Darlene Brock and Julie Bender reveal the ways we may be holding back the lines of communication with God and how we can draw close to him in spite of feeling distant. You’ll also learn how God may be trying to stretch you in your faith so you can grow in wisdom.

Your relationship with God will ebb and flow, just like any other relationship. And like those relationships, you keep them strong by repeatedly showing up. God will show up too—in his timing.

“There are seasons that are really hard. There are battles he’s asking you to fight with his strength and then there are battles he’ll fight for you.” —Darlene Brock

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Shoot straight with us for a minute: Did you set any goals at the start of this year?

If you answered ‘no,’ we’re right there with you. After all, weren’t we all just trying to get settled back in after the holidays?

Now that we are settled in, it’s the perfect time to revisit any changes you may have wanted to make this year. In this episode of Smart Living with Grit and Grace, Darlene Brock and Julie Bender share five priorities that would benefit from having structure backed by a goal: home, health, habits & happiness, heart and holiness.

Darlene and Julie unpack myriad ways to simplify your life and inject small changes that will reinvigorate your home, health, and relationships. Many of these tips are small and simple enough to put into practice today, so you can change your life without skipping a beat.

“Goals are ultimately the things that are going to give us some clarity on our priorities.” —Julie Bender

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Do you wish you had someone who could guide you through life? An experienced person who willingly shares their wisdom and insight to help you navigate every crossroads you approach?

If so, we’re happy to say we know just what you’re looking for: a mentor. The Mr. Miyagi to your Karate Kid!

In this Smart Living with Grit and Grace podcast episode, Darlene Brock and Julie Bender share the value in mentorship, how to actually find a mentor, and which areas of mentorship you might want to consider. Whether you’re looking for someone to divulge their tips, tricks, and secrets to confidence in motherhood, having a rock-solid marriage, or working your dream job, a mentor is the best place to start. They’ll ideally be experienced in a subject-specific area and have your best interests in mind.

Just keep in mind that mentorship comes with equal doses of advice and constructive criticism. Make sure you’re ready for feedback of any kind—while it may be a hard pill to swallow in the moment, it’ll help you grow in the direction you want to be!

“Walk with the wise and become wise. Associate with fools and get in trouble .” —Proverbs 13:20

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Life offers an endless rotation of surprises, so the only thing not surprising is our desire for order—often in the form of control. When we believe we can control what goes on around us, we can somewhat come to terms with the way our lives unfold. But controlling everything is impossible, and when we make that our aim, consciously or not, it can leave us on edge and erode our relationships.

In this podcast episode, Darlene Brock and Julie Bender discuss all the areas we might find hard to control—our tongues, our children, our appetite for more—and when our desire for control inches into dangerous territory.

If you brand yourself a control freak, or if others around you suggest as much, you’ll learn some tips for reining in your tendency to control your circumstances so you can begin to graciously accept your life for what it is—ups and downs included.

“Your way isn’t the only way, and it may not even be the best one.” —Julie Bender

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If you’ve been putting it off, consider this podcast episode as a sign to clean up your clutter!

As we get swept up in the busyness of life, we inadvertently let things accumulate. We outgrow our clothes or forget the items we’ve once loved and the gifts we’ve been given. Over time, we stash these items away to make room for new stuff we need or want. Out of sight, out of mind, right? Sadly, no. These items tend to pile up, consuming space in our homes and in the back of our minds.

If you’re ready to free up that space and finally tackle that pile in the corner that’s been haunting you for months, Darlene Brock and Julie Bender can advise on where and how to start. In this episode, they talk through how you can define ‘clutter’ and share a series of questions designed to help you determine whether you should truly hold onto something or toss it. They also dish on some cleaning perks that will keep you motivated. If you still need a little extra push, consider Darlene’s clutter-cleaning mantra: “I live in a home, not a storage unit.”

“If you want to improve your life immediately, clean out a closet. Often what we hold onto holds us back.” —Cheryl Richardson

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