Thoughts Off The Stem | Unfiltered Comedy

They Talk to Me Like I'm Five — Thoughts Off The Stem

I thought I was a pretty smart person. Then lately, everybody at work started talking to me like I'm five years old.

This week Justin asks the question out loud: am I one of the idiots I've been complaining about? From the ordering system where "the cart is a trigger," to the Blue's Clues rule of saying everything three times, to being lectured on a job he describes as "Lego for adults — simpler than putting your pants on in the morning."

Also in this one: the resting angry face vs. the mouth-breather blank stare, velcro shoes (he does not wear them — his shoes are slip-ons he tied a long time ago), overthinking vs. underthinking on tired days, the fake argument you replay in your head for two hours after a shift, and why weed at night makes him second-guess himself and sober him the next morning says "fuck that, I didn't do anything wrong."

Do you ever feel like this? Does anybody else get talked to like this and start wondering if it's you? That's what he actually wants to know.

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New episodes Fridays at 4:20pm.

What do men actually think women want? Men want to fix the problem and move on. Women ask a million questions. Same situation, completely different brains.

This week: meeting my girlfriend's kids and trying not to be too much, Swedish Fish, Arnold Schwarzenegger impressions, compartmentalizing uncomfortable feelings, and why "moving on" is usually just putting shit in a drawer and pretending it doesn't exist.

An unfiltered, stream-of-consciousness conversation about relationships, parenting, personality, and the ridiculous ways we navigate everyday life.

Thoughts Off The Stem — cannabis comedy with Justin Barone.

New episodes Fridays at 4:20pm. Listen at tots420.com

Todays Choices, get your 14 day Free Trial at www.habitsbegone.com

Get more TOTS at https://tots420.com

We made it to round 3. Thank you for all your votes. Keep the votes coming here: https://tophost.org/2026/justin-barone

What if God was a pothead?

A Heavenly Sesh on Thoughts Off The Stem — Justin Barone asks the question out loud and follows it wherever it goes. Cannabis comedy, unfiltered observations, and the kind of thought you only get off the stem.

Thoughts Off The Stem — cannabis comedy with Justin Barone.

New episodes Fridays at 4:20pm. Listen at tots420.com

Check out Holy Roller Apparel here: https://holyrollerapparel.ca

Get more TOTS at https://tots420.com

We made it to round 3. Thank you for all your votes. Keep the votes coming here: https://tophost.org/2026/justin-barone

Why does everything feel fake now? Instagram turned everyday life into a highlight reel, influencers started pretending they're living lifestyles they can't afford, and now AI is making it harder to tell what's actually real.

This week: fake lifestyles, rented Lamborghinis, AI slop, fake podcast clips, social media, misinformation — and a lesson my dad taught me as a kid after I broke a window and tried to lie about it. Failure is part of actually succeeding.

Maybe we don't need everything to look perfect. Maybe we just need people to be honest about what's actually going on.

Thoughts Off The Stem — cannabis comedy with Justin Barone.

New episodes Fridays at 4:20pm. Listen at tots420.com

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Everyone wants your time. Your job, your kids, your partner, your family, your friends, your phone — everybody needs something from you. And when you finally get a couple hours to yourself, somehow you feel guilty for not using them productively.

Because apparently the solution is always "just make time." Cool. Where the hell am I supposed to get it?

This week: waking up at 4:30 in the morning, a disastrous boxing class, disappearing into my bedroom for some peace and getting bombarded with texts the second I finally sit down — and why sometimes doing absolutely nothing is exactly what you needed.

Thoughts Off The Stem — cannabis comedy with Justin Barone.

New episodes Fridays at 4:20pm. Listen at tots420.com

At work, nobody wants to point fingers, so everyone talks in circles. Nobody wants to hurt anyone's feelings, so somehow everyone ends up more confused.

Now we've got phones, texts, notifications, FaceTime and a million ways to reach each other — yet we're somehow worse at actually talking to one another.

After a long, exhausting week, I needed a proper smoke day. No bullshit. Get high, clean the house, rearrange the living room and let the world roll off its back.

A stoned stream-of-consciousness about fucked-up communication, phones, work, getting older, finding a little peace, and why sometimes you just need to get high and rearrange your living room.

Thoughts Off The Stem — cannabis comedy with Justin Barone.

New episodes Fridays at 4:20pm. Listen at tots420.com

Vote for me on Top Host Here:

https://tophost.org/2026/justin-barone

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What happens when you become so famous and powerful that nobody around you is willing to tell you no?

Justin Barone goes down a rabbit hole about celebrity culture, fame, money, power, yes-men and what happens when people become insulated from criticism.

Starting with Michael Jackson and The Verdict, the conversation gets into celebrity scandals, extreme wealth, questionable decisions, conspiracy theories and the strange reality of being surrounded by people who might never tell you you're wrong.

Maybe that's the problem with fame.

Maybe when nobody can tell you no, eventually you stop knowing when you should hear it.

Thoughts Off The Stem is cannabis comedy packed with hilarious observations, personal stories and unfiltered takes on everyday life.

Visit Tots420.com

Vote for me on Top Host here:

https://tophost.org/2026/justin-barone

New episodes every Friday at 4:20 PM.

Join the sesh.

What happens when you actually let yourself get bored?You start thinking. You get creative. Your brain wanders.And sometimes that wandering takes you somewhere completely ridiculous.Justin Barone goes down the rabbit hole on boredom, attention spans, doom scrolling, technology, AI and conspiracy theories—and why maybe we need a little more silence and stillness in our lives.Thoughts Off The Stem is cannabis comedy packed with hilarious observations, personal stories, and unfiltered takes on everyday life.New episodes every Friday at 4:20 PM. Join the sesh.Visit Tots420.comVote for me on Top Host:https://tophost.org/2026/justin-barone

We were lied to about being adults.

As kids, adulthood sounded amazing. Freedom. Your own money. Nobody telling you what to do. You'd finally get to make the rules.Then you actually become an adult and realize it's basically Groundhog Day with bills.This week on Thoughts Off The Stem, I'm talking about the scam that is adulting—from doing the same stuff at work every day to coming home and repeating the same instructions to your kids until you sound exactly like your parents.Clean your room. Do your homework. Take out the garbage. Wash your ass.Eventually you realize the people you thought were miserable, strict adults when you were a kid weren't necessarily miserable at all.They were completely exhausted.Somewhere between responsibilities, work, parenting and trying to keep an entire household functioning, you also have the horrifying realization that your parents' words are now coming out of your mouth.Maybe growing up isn't becoming the adult you always wanted to be.Maybe it's finally understanding why your parents were so tired.Adulting Is a Scam.New episodes of Thoughts Off The Stem every Friday at 4:20 PM.Follow, subscribe and join the sesh.

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You spend years dreaming about a little peace and quiet. Then one day, you actually get it… and suddenly the house feels a little too quiet.

This week on Thoughts Off The Stem, I’m talking about my oldest heading off to university, the weird reality of watching your kid start their own life, and the completely irrational things that start running through a parent’s head when they realize they can’t protect them from everything anymore.

Of course, it wouldn’t be a TOTS episode without things going sideways. There’s a confession I definitely wasn’t prepared for, a trip back to my own university days that probably explains why I’m worried, and proof that apparently becoming an adult is terrifying for everyone involved.

Plus, I put the Can2Kit 39 Cone Filler through its paces during the sesh.

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It’s funny how badly you can want some peace and quiet… right up until you finally get it.

Voted one of the Best Comedy Podcasts of 2026 on Player FM.

Thoughts Off The Stem is a comedy podcast packed with hilarious observations, personal stories, and unfiltered takes on everyday life. Join Justin Barone as he turns life's frustrations, weird thoughts, and the absurd into laughs.

Listen, watch, and learn more at Tots420.com.