Thoughts Off The Stem | Unfiltered Comedy

Thoughts Off The Stem is a comedy podcast packed with hilarious observations, personal stories, and unfiltered takes on everyday life. Join Justin Barone as he turns life's frustrations, weird thoughts, and the absurd into laughs.

This week on Thoughts Off The Stem, Justin goes down a true crime rabbit hole and lands on the one question every guy has asked himself at least once — could you actually survive prison?

It starts the way all great sesh conversations do. Someone asks if they could take Mike Tyson. Someone else wants to know how many guys they could fight at once. Then that one dude in the circle — you know exactly who he is — announces he'd destroy a pack of wolves, go full Navy SEAL on anyone who touched his family, and could absolutely take five guys at once. Shut up Carl.

But then the real question hits. If we're all so tough, could we actually survive jail?

The reality check is brutal. You're not Jason Statham. You're a blue collar dad who was mowing the lawn yesterday, having tea parties with a three year old, and giving your wife foot massages. Now you're supposed to walk into the yard and cold cock a gang member with a full dad bod, a touch of arthritis, and zero training.

Yeah. Right.

This one hits different. 🌿

🎙️ New episodes every Friday at 4:20 PM | tots420.com 🔗 Follow on Spotify so you never miss a drop

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Thoughts Off The Stem is a comedy podcast packed with hilarious observations, personal stories, and unfiltered takes on everyday life. Join Justin Barone as he turns life's frustrations, weird thoughts, and the absurd into laughs.

This week on Thoughts Off The Stem, Justin is fired up. Like genuinely, properly fired up.

A UFC commentator texts the president about psychedelics on a Saturday. By Monday he's in the Oval Office. Men are hitting themselves in the face with hammers to get dates. Africa is literally cracking in half. And somehow in the middle of all of this absolute madness, strangers on the internet decided Justin is a bad dad. Because of comedy clips.

Everyone just wants to be right all the time. Nobody wants to laugh. Nobody wants to look inward. They just want to find a stranger online and unload on them instead of dealing with their own stuff.

This week's episode is a high energy, zero filter rant about the world, the angry people in the comments, and the one thing everyone needs to hear but nobody wants to say out loud.

Spoiler: the real reason you're mad at strangers says a lot more about you than it does about them. 🌿

🎙️ THOUGHTS OFF THE STEM — Cannabis Comedy Podcast🌿 New episodes every Friday at 4:20 PM🏆 Voted Best Comedy Podcast of 2026 — Player FM🔗 Listen on Spotify, Apple Podcasts & all major platforms🌐 tots420.com - Sesh Essentials: https://tots420.com/sesh/ - Merch:https://my-store-10fe8fc.creator-spring.com/

Follow on Spotify so you never miss a drop

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Thoughts Off The Stem is a comedy podcast packed with hilarious observations, personal stories, and unfiltered takes on everyday life. Join Justin Barone as he turns life's frustrations, weird thoughts, and the absurd into laughs.

This week on Thoughts Off The Stem, Justin takes on the one restaurant that had one job — cook the chicken — and somehow couldn't pull it off.

A night out at Swiss Chalet with the girlfriend turns into a full investigation when the chicken arrives looking suspicious, the tables are sticky, the host is MIA, and one overworked waitress is holding the entire operation together with sheer will and apologies.

Then the Dude For Real segment takes it further with the most disgusting restaurant horror stories the internet has to offer — bandaid burgers, cockroach coleslaw, salad bugs, and things that will make you seriously reconsider eating out ever again.

Plus this week's Weed Facts breaks down how to make cannabutter — because after hearing these restaurant stories you're going to want to cook at home anyway.

You had one job, Swiss Chalet. One job.

☕ Help keep this podcast independent! Support the show and buy us a coffee here: buymeacoffee.com/TOTS420

🎙️ New episodes every Friday at 4:20 PM | tots420.com 🔗 Follow on Spotify so you never miss a drop

Buy TOTS Merch at the TOTS Store

Elevate your sesh with my hand picked Sesh Essentials

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Help keep the podcast independent

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Thoughts Off The Stem is a comedy podcast packed with hilarious observations, personal stories, and unfiltered takes on everyday life. Join Justin Barone as he turns life's frustrations, weird thoughts, and the absurd into laughs.

They start cute. Cuddly. Irresistible. And then something happens.

This week on Thoughts Off The Stem, Justin breaks down the greatest long con in human history — parenthood. Conspiracy theorists have been out here looking for shapeshifters, and they've been right under our noses the whole time. They're called children.

From adorable babies who trick you into loving them, to teenagers who drain your wallet, ignore your rules, stink up the house, and act like they built it — this is a raw, unfiltered, comedic rant about the reality of raising kids nobody warned you about.

Single dad. Three teenagers. One boy, two girls. Zero chill.

If you have kids, you'll feel this in your soul. If you don't have kids, consider this your warning.

🎙️ New episodes every Friday | tots420.com

🔗 Follow on Spotify so you never miss a drop

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Thoughts Off The Stem is a comedy podcast packed with hilarious observations, personal stories, and unfiltered takes on everyday life. Join Justin Barone as he turns life's frustrations, weird thoughts, and the absurd into laughs.

Meta glasses are cool. Walking through life like you're in Minority Report is genuinely impressive. But when they're on, they're on — and they see everything.

This week on Thoughts Off The Stem Justin Barone breaks down the real world problems that developers and consumers never think about until it's too late. Meta glasses recording things nobody consented to. Tesla owners blindsided by a $25,000 battery replacement bill. And the fundamental disconnect between building cool technology and actually thinking about how people will use it in the real world.

If you're recording with your face you'd think — you'd think about that.

Weed Facts this week: The newest cannabis impairment detection technology using VR headsets and eye tracking — boasting 98% accuracy. Your eyes tell on you every time.

Dude For Real: Meta workers are blowing the whistle on what they've actually seen through users smart glasses. It's exactly as disturbing as you'd expect.

New episodes every Friday at 4:20PM. Follow the show — we're pushing to 1,000 followers on Spotify. 🌿

Visit Tots420.com for more episodes and cannabis education.

Help the show stay Independent with Official TOTS Merch

Check out he Sesh Essentials at Tots420.com/sesh/

Upgrade your roll with KING PALM

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Thoughts Off The Stem is a comedy podcast packed with hilarious observations, personal stories, and unfiltered takes on everyday life. Join Justin Barone as he turns life's frustrations, weird thoughts, and the absurd into laughs.

I spent the last year in job interviews trying to break into project management after leaving the cannabis industry.

And every single time — without fail — someone in a suit would pull me aside, lean in, and whisper that they know someone who smokes weed. Like it's a secret. Like I'm supposed to react like they just told me they know Jesus.

Here's what they don't realize. I've walked into more interviews than I can count and recognized faces — not because I'm a great networker, but because I sold them weed.

This week on Thoughts Off The Stem it's just a sesh. No segments. Just real talk about cannabis normalization, the stigma that won't die, and why both sides of the debate need to take a breath.

The naysayers need to ease up. And honestly? We as the cannabis community need to stop pretending everything about weed is completely safe too. Progress is happening. Let's act like it.

New episodes every Friday at 4:20PM. Follow the show so the sesh comes straight to you. 🌿

Visit ⁠⁠⁠Tots420.com⁠⁠⁠ for more episodes and cannabis education.

📺 Watch on YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thoughtsoffthestem⁠⁠⁠

🎧 Listen on Spotify: ⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/5wHWxJ1IeOtMeFWicmtwd8?si=9ad56a63eb694e27⁠⁠⁠

☕ Keep the show Independent: ⁠⁠⁠https://buymeacoffee.com/tots420⁠⁠⁠

🛠️ Sesh Essentials: ⁠⁠⁠https://tots420.com/sesh/⁠

👕 Merch: ⁠⁠⁠https://my-store-10fe8fc.creator-spring.com/⁠⁠

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Thoughts Off The Stem is a comedy podcast packed with hilarious observations, personal stories, and unfiltered takes on everyday life. Join Justin Barone as he turns life's frustrations, weird thoughts, and the absurd into laughs.

Someone slid into my DMs and asked me to have the CEO of Crowds on Demand on the podcast. So I did what any self respecting pothead would do — I went down the rabbit hole.

Crowds on Demand is a real company. You can literally buy a crowd of paid activists for $39.99 per person. Need a protest outside your competitor's headquarters? Done. Need a packed political rally? Done. Need a fake grassroots movement with hired actors as leaders? Also done.

The person who reached out to me? Kristin M. Davis — the Manhattan Madam — who is now a PR consultant rebranding scandal-ridden public figures for a living.

He claims he wants to blow the whistle on the fake protest industry. But he won't name his clients. He won't name his sources. And his company still sells the exact same service he's supposedly exposing.

Here's my take — when you're whistleblowing you're supposed to do it for the better of society, not for the better of your bank account.

I broke it all down this week on Thoughts Off The Stem. And at the end of the episode I'm asking you directly — should I have him on the show? Because I genuinely don't think I'll get an honest conversation out of him.

Drop your answer in the comments.

New episodes every Friday at 4:20PM. Subscribe so the sesh comes straight to you. 🌿

Visit ⁠⁠⁠Tots420.com⁠⁠⁠ for more episodes and cannabis education.

📺 Watch on YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thoughtsoffthestem⁠⁠⁠

🎧 Listen on Spotify: ⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/5wHWxJ1IeOtMeFWicmtwd8?si=9ad56a63eb694e27⁠⁠⁠

☕ Keep the show Independent: ⁠⁠⁠https://buymeacoffee.com/tots420⁠⁠⁠

🛠️ Sesh Essentials: ⁠⁠⁠https://tots420.com/sesh/⁠

👕 Merch: ⁠⁠⁠https://my-store-10fe8fc.creator-spring.com/⁠⁠

Research links from the sesh:

https://crowdsondemand.com/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kristin_M._Davis

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crowds_on_Demand

https://www.nbclosangeles.com/news/local/concerned-citizens-turn-out-to-be-political-theater/2021439/

https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2024-03-14/paid-protester-company-looking-to-hire-7-foot-300-pound-giants-for-intimidation-factor

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Thoughts Off The Stem is a comedy podcast packed with hilarious observations, personal stories, and unfiltered takes on everyday life. Join Justin Barone as he turns life's frustrations, weird thoughts, and the absurd into laughs.

There are men on the internet hitting themselves in the face with a hammer. On purpose. To get dates.

Justin has questions.

This week Thoughts Off The Stem breaks down Looks Maxxing — the incel community's full-send obsession with optimizing their face with a hammer and chewing gum — 400 sticks a day to chisel those jaw muscles. If the plan to get a date starts with blunt force trauma to the skull, Justin would like to suggest a different strategy.

Then we pivot to what weed actually does to your skin, because if you're going to take a hammer to the face you should probably know what your edibles are doing to your collagen first.

🔬 Weed Facts: Does cannabis cause acne or clear it up? The science is messier than you think.https://www.cosmopolitan.com/style-beauty/beauty/a69423560/can-smoking-weed-cause-acne/

🤦 Dude For Real: The full Looks Maxxing rabbit hole explained.https://www.buzzfeed.com/ajanibazile/looksmaxxing-explainer

If you made it this far, you're already one of us. Hit subscribe so you never miss a sesh — new episodes drop weekly.

Thoughts Off The Stem is a solo comedy podcast hosted by Justin Barone. Comedy first, cannabis always.

Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠Tots420.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ for more episodes and cannabis education.

📺 Watch on YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thoughtsoffthestem⁠⁠⁠⁠

🎧 Listen on Spotify: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/5wHWxJ1IeOtMeFWicmtwd8?si=9ad56a63eb694e27⁠⁠⁠⁠

☕ Keep the show Independent: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://buymeacoffee.com/tots420⁠⁠⁠⁠

🛠️ Sesh Essentials: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://tots420.com/sesh/⁠⁠

👕 Merch: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://my-store-10fe8fc.creator-spring.com/⁠⁠⁠

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Thoughts Off The Stem is a comedy podcast packed with hilarious observations, personal stories, and unfiltered takes on everyday life. Join Justin Barone as he turns life's frustrations, weird thoughts, and the absurd into laughs.

What do a 1930s paper tycoon and a modern-day alpha influencer have in common? Massive fragile egos and world-class temper tantrums.

Justin breaks down how the same playbook that criminalized cannabis in 1937 is being run today by manosphere creators — and why it all comes down to insecure men who never got over themselves. Harry Anslinger, William Randolph Hearst, and HSTikkyTokky walk into a bar. None of them can handle it.

Thoughts Off The Stem is a solo comedy podcast hosted by Justin Barone. Comedy first, cannabis always in the background.

Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠Tots420.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ for more episodes and cannabis education.

📺 Watch on YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thoughtsoffthestem⁠⁠⁠⁠

🎧 Listen on Spotify: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/5wHWxJ1IeOtMeFWicmtwd8?si=9ad56a63eb694e27⁠⁠⁠⁠

☕ Keep the show Independent: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://buymeacoffee.com/tots420⁠⁠⁠⁠

🛠️ Sesh Essentials: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://tots420.com/sesh/⁠⁠

👕 Merch: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://my-store-10fe8fc.creator-spring.com/⁠⁠⁠

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Thoughts Off The Stem is a comedy podcast packed with hilarious observations, personal stories, and unfiltered takes on everyday life. Join Justin Barone as he turns life's frustrations, weird thoughts, and the absurd into laughs.

Your girl is slowly getting rid of all your stuff and you didn't even notice until the blackout blinds went up and there were seventeen lotions on the bathroom counter. Also — has anyone else pulled a three-foot hair out of their ass crack before their morning coffee? Just Justin? Cool.

This week Justin rants about what happens when estrogen moves in and your bachelor pad quietly becomes a five-star spa, then pivots to the actual science of cannabis and anxiety — specifically the terpenes that act as a biological off-switch when your high gets a little too intense.

Thoughts Off The Stem is a solo comedy podcast hosted by Justin Barone. Comedy first, cannabis always in the background.

Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠Tots420.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ for more episodes and cannabis education.

📺 Watch on YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thoughtsoffthestem⁠⁠⁠⁠

🎧 Listen on Spotify: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/5wHWxJ1IeOtMeFWicmtwd8?si=9ad56a63eb694e27⁠⁠⁠⁠

☕ Keep the show Independent: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://buymeacoffee.com/tots420⁠⁠⁠⁠

🛠️ Sesh Essentials: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://tots420.com/sesh/⁠⁠

👕 Merch: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://my-store-10fe8fc.creator-spring.com/⁠⁠⁠

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