Tim Goodman's TV Talk Machine

If you tuned in for smart, witty commentary on TVTM favorite like "Breaking Bad," "The Pacific," or 'Treme," sorry to disappoint you, but you're not going to find it in this episdoe. Okay, you might get a minute or two of Power Rankings breakdown towards the end, but that's about it. No, in this episode, Tim and the guys talk about nothing really. Okay, that's not entirely true either. They talk about the NFL Draft's shift to primetime. Oh, and QB reads Juan Antonio Samaranch's eulogy.

Hell yes we did a TVTM podcast. Our producer, The Greatest (aka Ali Thanawalla) finally herded Question Boy (aka Joe Garofoli) into the Podcave and off his backside. Inspired, Benny (aka Benny Evangelista) also showed up. And so did I, just to add some actual talent to the non-pro line-up. We had lots of e-mails (some of them angry) and a decent amount of calls (including one from Thailand). There were voices. (Bill Walton, you ask? Of course. But Ali learned a little something about the pronunciation of Peter Krause and that really derailed things. We apologize in advance to Germany.)

This week, QB is recovering from attending a Tea Party event and The Greatest was knocked out by Ken Norton aka The Flu. Macworld's Jason Snell dons a raincoat/shorty rob and fills in for QB. Benny mans the knobs and puts his headphones in the right hole. In this episode, the guys breakdown this week's Power Rankings. They also hold a really short vigil for "24." They also discuss the idea of multitasking and tweeting while watching television, and when it works and when it doesn't.

Just so you know, this isn't a Celebrity Podcast, where I interview people I like in the industry, like the last one I did with "Breaking Bad" creator Vince Gilligan. Those can be informative and sometimes insightful. They are professionally done. This is not one of those. Nope, this is our "regular" old TVTM podcast, where stupid is as stupid does. Or something stupid like that. We talk TV. We answer mail. And phone messages. There are, ahem, "voices" of people like Tom Brokaw and Howard Cosell and of course! Bill Walton, our Patron Saint of Voices on the podcast. Even Existential French Woman and the cast of "Bars" drop by. We are without Benny, who was "working." So there's absolutely no foley work here. If you're longing for the sound of, say, a door closing, forget it. But Question Boy decided to show up. The podcast is produced by Ali, aka "The Greatest," and someone has the audacity to call in and say he's good at the job. That needs to end right now. In other highlights, I'm asked to choose between red wine and Diet Coke. Plus, someone had a pointless dream about the podcast. "Enjoy!"

Tim Goodman talks with Vince Gilligan, the creator of "Breaking Bad," AMC's hit drama about Walt White, a chemistry teacher diagnosed with cancer. With nothing left to lose, White decides to go into the drug business and quickly becomes a major player in the drug world. "Breaking Bad" returns for it's third season on March 21st.

Well, after a brief hiatus, the TV Talk Machine is back for the second episode of 2010. This time, Oh Great One Tim Goodman, Joe "Question Bay" Garofoli and Benny "Manny" Evangelista are joined by new TVTM producer Ali "The Greatest" Thanawalla. In this episode, Tim and the guys give their post-Olympics analysis (if you're a fan of NBC, cover your ears), and Tim previews the Spring schedule. And as always, they take your phone calls, and things get a little steamy (and awkward).

Who doesn't love ponies? Anyway, after being off "the air" since December, the world's most dangerous, stupid and pointless podcast about television is back! We have a new podcave (actually, someone else's office). We've gone through three producers, one intern, any number of Question Girls, a dozen or so 12-step programs, a grand jury investigation, two foreign tribunals and successfully (and almost legally) avoided international sanctions. So, happy third birthday to us! We can't be killed. We even took a phone call from Qatar, so put that in your Doha pipe and smoke it! Our world domination continues. See, now you want to listen. It's free. Easy. And also quite popular on iTunes. Although we turned down an invite to go on "Fighting Talk," our good friends at the BBC and my recent appearance on Bill Simmons' "B.S. Report" podcast have finally nudged the decision-makers at TVTM to consider expanding the cult. Even though tens of thousands of people listen to us monthly (when we're not too lazy to actually do the podcast) we are very much an acquired taste, as any number of our measly 573 or so TVTM Facebook fans will attest. In theory, this podcast is about television. In practice, it's a collection of rants, asides, dribs and drabs of actual answers to listeners who have questions, inside jokes, terrible impersonations (Walter Cronkite, Juan Antoniio Samaranch, The Count from "Sesame Street," Vladamir Putin, Dora the Explorer, the Existential French Woman and "hundreds" more, including our patron saint, Bill Walton. Plus porno versions of all of those people, except Walton.) These podcasts are not to be confused with the TV Talk Machine's spin-off "Celebrity Podcasts" (see link on right side of this blog) where I talk professionally with a number of important people I like in the industry and do it with actual TV knowledge. Those have value. And a point. If, however, you'd like to listen to our more regular TVTM podcasts and you're a newbie wondering why we have listeners around the globe (that part is actually true), iTunes availability, a Facebook fan page and a toll-free hotline for those living in the U.S. of A, then here's a quick primer: Our cast is made up of Yours Truly, plus Question Boy (Chronicle political writer Joe Garofoli) and Manny (Chronicle business writer Benny Evangelista) who "mans the knobs" and produces this thing. Or as we like to say, "produces" this thing. (We go through producers like Spinal Tap goes through drummers, just FYI.) Whenever we're not too lazy, we put on our shorty robes, head to the podcave and answer your questions while channeling Walton and any number of other bad voices we can conjure. We encourage people to take the TVTM logo with them when they travel and take "Flat Bastard" photos that are posted on our Facebook page (seriously, you should go look). We ask only that you set your bar low for information and entertainment. No animals are hurt in the creation of this podcast.

The whole special menagerie (Goodman, Question Boy, Benny Durwood, Sheri from the Vale, PPage and Justin Beck) return for another fun-filled holiday 'cast. It's chock full of dreidel spinning, bah-humbugery, inappropriate sexual innuedo, wassailing and a very special Christmas fable narrated by PPage.

Tim, Question Boy, Benny and Durwood are joined by very special guests: Sherry from the Vale, PPage and the ghost of producers past--Justin Beck. Things get warm and fuzzy--and steamy--as the all-star cast talks TV and learns the true meaning of Christmas. Plus: a somewhat audible live phone call with George D.!

We're still here, holding down the dilapidated bunker that is the second floor podcave with lots to say about The Venture Brothers, how to talk like a Gilmore Girl and why Al Gore has such bad teeth. Plus special visits from Angry Regis, Porno Count and Tim Gunn!