Time To Grow Up

Sarah has such a unique story, and I am so glad we cross paths to allow me to gain some insight on what it is like to be ‘on the other side’ of the coin when it comes to being a parent, where you have a child that is studying in a completely different country. I was very much (and still am) that child to my parents, and of course, I have my views, but it was terrific to get a perspective from someone (Sarah) who has her child currently studying in Japan. All this while doing her Masters at the University of Illinois and being a coach.

In addition, Sarah also has a fantastic story about being a surrogate mother, and she goes into detail on some of the points to consider before going down the path and how she has decided to still keep in touch with the child and the family till this very day.

You can find Sarah here at https://www.instagram.com/wakeupreadyllc/

My IG https://www.instagram.com/i_am_choong/

And if you would like 150 free recipes to help with your health goals check them out here https://go.iamchoong.com/free-recipe-pack

They say as you grow older, your views change, and in the case of Mike, that was the vibe I was getting. Honestly, I give all the credit to him because for someone who might be old, being receptive to change is important, especially as a parent, and always being able to adapt to the situation.

The conversation opened up my eyes to see that we need to ensure we let our children be who they want to be, but even as parents, we sometimes need to be open to exploring new things for ourselves, be it a new hobby, going into therapy or just talking to someone about your feelings (the big F word) but also dont force someone to change unless if they are ready emotionally to do so.

You can find Mike here at https://www.instagram.com/oldbastardbjj/ T

he gym he is at at https://www.instagram.com/magicbjj/

My IG https://www.instagram.com/i_am_choong/

I had the pleasure of speaking to none other than the old bastard himself, Mr Mike Mahaffery. Mike and I connected via a little mutual group called BJJ Mental Models. While he graciously stroked my ego a couple of times on my BJJ skill (thanks, Mike), Mike gave me a few gems of wisdom as a father himself, having kids who are adults who mostly have their own interests and hobbies.

He reinforces the idea that at the end of the day, kids will grow up into adults of their own, and its essential always to acknowledge that as a parent. Aside from being a BJJ Black Belt, Mike also shared some of his experiences, being a Gen X , on his views on therapy and why and how parents should look into it more often even if you are of the so called 'older generation'.

You can find Mike here at https://www.instagram.com/oldbastardbjj/

The gym he is at at https://www.instagram.com/magicbjj/

My 28-day free nutrition coaching series: https://sendfox.com/choong

My 150 free recipes https://sendfox.com/lp/1d8qdj

My IG https://www.instagram.com/i_am_choong/

So, if you did catch this episode, it was recorded a few weeks after Marcus was born. And boy, oh boy, life is different! I took a few things speaking to Gerry, and I had a lot of time to reflect on some of the things I would try to do with my kids as they grow older.

It's always going to be a fine line on 'baby-ing' them VS letting them learn from mistakes. I think one of the things that I am starting to realize with parents who end up having kids who grow up to be independent is that it is easy for parents to step in and help, it is a lot harder, as Gerry suggested, NOT to try to help. Let them make those mistakes, communicate openly, and love them.

You can find Gerry on LinkedIn here https://www.linkedin.com/in/gerrylynch/ My IG https://www.instagram.com/i_am_choong/

I had the pleasure of speaking to Gerry Lynch, a jack of all trades but primarily at this point, a great business coach and even greater father to his children (biological and stepson).

For context and to set this episode up, I have been working with Gerry and his wife as their coach, and I know how good their family dynamics are. It's fantastic to get some fatherly advice and general good mindset approaches when running a small business while ensuring I (and other parents alike) can also spend time with the family.

You can find Gerry on LinkedIn here

https://www.linkedin.com/in/gerrylynch/

My 28-day free nutrition coaching series: https://sendfox.com/choong

My 150 free recipes https://sendfox.com/lp/1d8qdj

My IG https://www.instagram.com/i_am_choong/

Based on my guess (which tends not always to be accurate lol) by the time this airs, we should have Marcus and I can imagine the chaos observed at home. While recording and doing this episode, Cliff has greatly reminded me that to be the most present parent you can be, it's vital always to spend time just to calm your mind with things like yoga. He also gave a fascinating perspective, which was that while being an older parent, there are a lot of upsides to things which ultimately tend to lead to him being able to spend more time with his kids. And while I am certainly in no position to take that advice on board anymore (once you become a parent, you cant go back lol) I do think that the lessons I took from Cliff is something I wish to pass on to others as well as my kids.

You can find Cliff here on https://cliffharvey.com/

his IG here https://www.instagram.com/cliffdoggydog/

Where we work at HPI here https://www.holisticperformance.institute/

My 28-day free nutrition coaching series: https://sendfox.com/choong

My 150 free recipes https://sendfox.com/lp/1d8qdj

My IG https://www.instagram.com/i_am_choong/

Woohoo, another podcast in the books. Let's see how long you boys can keep this up because, by the time this comes out, Marcus will likely be tearing up the house with Henry. I have the pleasure of chatting with Cliff about what life will be like for me when we go from a one-kid to a two-kid household. It's cool to chat with Cliff outside of what we usually discuss at work: nutrition and the best ways to teach and train nutritionists. Its nice to get his take on his experience going from one kid to two. From the present, how to ensure you and your partner pair up on tasks, as well as a discussion on when should, at least for a man, look to start a family?

You can find Cliff here on https://cliffharvey.com/

his IG here https://www.instagram.com/cliffdoggydog/

Where we work at HPI here https://www.holisticperformance.institute/

My 28-day free nutrition coaching series: https://sendfox.com/choong

My 150 free recipes https://sendfox.com/lp/1d8qdj

My IG https://www.instagram.com/i_am_choong/

It is always great to reconnect with old friends, and in this case, reconnecting with my first-ever mentor, Pete shed light on how far we both have come. When I first worked with Pete, this would have been when his kids were still young and in primary school, and back then (as Pete would say), being naive, I never really knew what parenthood was like. It's pretty interesting to sit back now and edit/listen to the conversation that we had on the previous episode, which reinforced an idea in my head as to where I ultimately want to be in terms of how I want to obtain a stable financial situation for my family, but also making sure I am a role model for my kids. It was a great chat, and once a mentor, always a mentor, and it did feel like I could pick his brains on certain touchy subjects like divorce and how kids deal with things as they grow up, which is pretty cool to hear from his end.

You can find Pete here on https://www.instagram.com/petetansley/

My 28-day free nutrition coaching series: https://sendfox.com/choong

My 150 free recipes https://sendfox.com/lp/1d8qdj

My IG https://www.instagram.com/i_am_choong/

I had the pleasure of speaking to my first-ever mentor, Pete Tansley. We go way back to 2018/201,9 when he was the first ever mentor/coach I hired outside of the context of sport-specific and nutrition training. Back then, I knew Pete had twins, and he shared his stories about being a father and a business owner.

It feels like things have come full circle, and I am asking for his thoughts on parenthood so far. From topics like being present, how to ensure you take care of yourself first, ways to do deep work, and the struggles of what it was really like when you find out you have twins, only to have your business come crashing down and heading into a divorce. It was such a great chat, and I had a lot to think about along the lines of trying my best to do high-quality work so that I have more time to spend with the children before they go on and have their interests.

You can find Pete here on https://www.instagram.com/petetansley/

My 28-day free nutrition coaching series: https://sendfox.com/choong

My 150 free recipes https://sendfox.com/lp/1d8qdj

My IG https://www.instagram.com/i_am_choong/

Whew! What an episode! I sincerely thank Newton for being so open to chat about his family, especially in light of recent events. There are many takeaways from our conversation, but primarily, we reached an agreement on a few things that can significantly benefit one's mental health as a parent: Ensure you have a community behind you, whether big or small, always take time to process your emotions, and no matter what cards life deals you, keep playing the game.

Thank you again for the chat. From our family to yours, we wish you the best and a speedy recovery for the young one!

You can find Newton here https://www.instagram.com/newtoncheng https://www.newtoncheng.com/ And myself below

My 28-day free nutrition coaching series: https://sendfox.com/choong

My 150 free recipes https://sendfox.com/lp/1d8qdj

My IG https://www.instagram.com/i_am_choong/