Don’t you just love that feeling of being in love? Did you know you can create that feeling whenever you want?

We are designed to feel love and be love, and love is who we are. To create a feeling of love, all you need to do is find something to love.

Look around you – there’s so much to love. Love the sun sparkling on water…love the songs birds are singing to each other…love the road you drive on and the car you drive and the people who designed and built those roads and cars so you could use them. Love the music coming out of the radio, the radio itself and the people whose brains conceived of this amazing device and the artists who wrote and created that wonderful music.

When you focus on what you love, you feel that love. And when you learn to love everything, you’ll be in love any time you want to be!

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Want a perfect way to gut your self-esteem and self-confidence?

Of course you don’t, yet you probably do it a lot.

What is “it”? Comparing yourself to others. If you’re like most people, nearly 10% of your thinking time each day is spent comparing yourself to others, often feeling like you don’t measure up.

Can you stop doing that? When you find yourself using someone else as a yardstick to measure yourself, ask these questions: Is that person the best measure of me and my talents? Where are they in their journey in relation to my journey? Is this person possibly comparing themselves to me?

You are the only you in the entire world. There is literally no comparison. Can you stop comparing yourself to others and use that time and energy to contribute in your own, one-of-a-kind way? The world needs more people like you, not you like other people.

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If you’ve lived more than a few years, there are people who have let you down in some way. Maybe you trusted or loved them and they used or betrayed you.

If you’re like most people, maybe you beat yourself over it.

May I give you a more powerful way to think about it? You gave trust or love to this person. You opened yourself to them, you felt good doing it, and you learned from the experience.

What they did with the trust or love you gave was up to them and the repercussions they suffer are on them. Let them live their life and let yourself off the hook.

You did the best you could with the information you had, and now you have more information. Instead of beating yourself up, focus on those in your life who deserve your trust and your love and pour it on them. It’s so much more fun to release and move on than it is to regret and beat yourself up.

Move on, and enjoy looking for better people to love and trust.

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Is there someone who doesn’t like you? Do you respond by doing things to help them see the “real” you?

Don’t.

It’s a waste of your precious time and energy to try to make someone like you. When you’re around someone who doesn’t appreciate you, realize it’s their issue, not yours. There are people you don’t like. Maybe you don’t even know why you don’t want to be around them – you just don’t.

Allow others the same freedom.

Don’t keep trying to make someone like you. Let them come to you eventually, if they want to, and in the meantime, let them be while you focus on the people in your life who already like and love you. That’s where your precious time and energy belongs.

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Observe the world around you for any length of time and you’ll understand that a lot of what happens around you, and sometimes even to you isn’t perfect. Sometimes it’s horrible or tragic.

There is darkness that may occasionally happen to you, but the darkness isn’t you. You are the light that continues to shine in spite of the darkness you endure. You are the beacon that others look to in order to find their own strength.

You may not know the influence you have on others, and yet you do. You are the light that others follow, being inspired by how you’ve navigated the darkness in your own life.

Be the light and shine in a way only you can.

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Time is on your side. Really!

If you’re faced with a big decision or a big problem, wait. And then wait some more. Focus on something you enjoy or feel in control of and let time bring the solution to you.

When I do this, I give the problem to the committee in the back of my head. That’s my personification of my intuition – you can use my term or create your own. Each time I start to ruminate about the problem, I remind myself that the committee is at work and will let me know when they have the answer.

Let your brain work on the problem in the background while you go about your life. And suddenly, almost like magic, the perfect solution or decision will come to you.

See – that committee in the back of your head takes care of you!

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Is it right for you to want to be happy? When you want to be happy, is it tough to find happiness? How often do you actually look for happiness?

And is life supposed to be happy all the time?

It might surprise you to know that it isn’t. Life isn’t about being happy all the time – it’s in the setbacks, heartbreaks, and yearning for more that we stretch ourselves and grow. It’s in the reaching for more and the catching up to that more that make life truly worth living, and you can only reach and catch up when you’re not quite there.

Teach yourself to be OK when things are not optimal, because those are the times that line you up for the next level of happiness and success.

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Do you know the word godwink? Maybe you say “happenstance” or “synchronicity” or “coincidence” – all are similar words for the special little things you notice that are somehow special to you.

Some people see a butterfly or certain kind of bird and feel the presence of a departed loved one. Some see matching numbers like 333 or 1111 and feel a connection to the infinite.

Think of what your special godwink might be, and notice and appreciate it when it shows up in your day. Smile and use that moment to remember how much good there is in the world and how wonderful it is when it shows up for you.

Being in the moment instead of letting your time-traveling brain wander around in past problems or future worries lets you focus on life’s little miracles, which are always just waiting for you to see them.

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Do you make yourself small?

I spent a big part of my life trying to fit in, to adapt, to be part of…whatever. I was making myself small. And then I discovered that we were never meant to be small. People who cared about us taught us to adapt and fit in because that’s what they’d been taught to do.

When we focus on fitting in, we limit our own bigness. We were born big – full of wonder and curiosity and possibilities. Remember how that felt, before you began to adapt to the world instead of shaping your world your way?

You are still full of wonder and curiosity and possibilities. Resist the urge to make yourself small. Be big – the universe is expanding and changing, and you can, too.

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Are there people in your life that get on your last nerve? People you avoid when you can and dread being near when you can’t? Maybe you even think they’re bad or evil, so you are justified in disliking them.

They may not deserve your good thoughts, but you deserve your good thoughts about them. Face it, everyone has at least one redeeming quality – you owe it to yourself find it.

When you can find just one positive thing to focus on about that person you dislike, you shift your attitude from one of negativity to one of positivity and that benefits you.

Can you do that? Because when you can, you become a better friend, co-worker, leader, and partner.

PS...want more? Subscribe to the Mind, Body, Soul Sessions podcast, a weekly mental spa treatment for your total self! #success #leader #lawofattraction #personaldevelopment #mentalwellbeing