Toddler Purgatory

How do you find an authentic mom group that lets you be yourself, especially when you're the only mother of color there? Helena Andrews-Dyer discusses learnings from mothers with different lived experiences with Molly and Blaire.

Helena Andrews-Dyer is an award-winning culture reporter for The Washington Post, covering the intersection of popular culture, race, politics and art in the nation’s capital. Her third book, “The Mamas: What I Learned About Kids, Class and Race From Moms Not Like Me,” was published by Crown in August 2022. 

Helena, Blaire, and Molly discuss:

When your mom friends are willing to sit in discomfort with their own biases, and when you feel you can be around them without stepping on eggshells or withholding parts of yourself, those are the mom friendships that are healthy and beneficial to maintain long-term.

Here's where you can find Helena:

Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:

If you’re looking for self-care that’s quick and easy, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/LAUGHING. 

Misfits Market is an intuitive online grocery shopping platform. Visit get.misfitsmarket.com/toddlerpurgatory and use code LAUGHING25 to get $25 off your first order by June 30, 2023. Terms and conditions apply. 

Try Peloton Tread Risk-Free with a 30-day home trial. New members only. Not available in remote locations. See additional terms at onepeloton.com/home-trial. 

Ready, Set, Food! helps prevent food allergies in children. Go to readysetfood.com/todpurgs & use code TODPURGS for 15% off your first order. 

Ritual’s Essential for Women 18 and up is a multivitamin you can actually trust. Visit ritual.com/toddler for 10% off during your first 3 months.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How do we make time for our partners when all of our time is taken up with work and kids? We asked our listeners for date night ideas ranging from fancy to simple - and how to work those special times into your regular schedule.

Molly and Blaire discuss:

The secret to date night is it doesn't have to be fancy - it can be anything from a walk around the block to a night out on the town hopping from restaurant to restaurant - or you can stay home and roast up a nice moose - whatever you prefer.

Links!

Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:

If you’re looking for self-care that’s quick and easy, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/LAUGHING. 

Misfits Market is an intuitive online grocery shopping platform. Visit get.misfitsmarket.com/toddlerpurgatory and use code LAUGHING25 to get $25 off your first order by June 30, 2023. Terms and conditions apply. 

Try Peloton Tread Risk-Free with a 30-day home trial. New members only. Not available in remote locations. See additional terms at onepeloton.com/home-trial. 

Ready, Set, Food! helps prevent food allergies in children. Go to readysetfood.com/todpurgs & use code TODPURGS for 15% off your first order. 

Ritual’s Essential for Women 18 and up is a multivitamin you can actually trust. Visit ritual.com/toddler for 10% off during your first 3 months.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How do we instill a love of reading in our kids from a young age? Author and educator Maya Smart shares simple strategies for developing language skills in young kids.

Maya Payne Smart is a parent educator, literacy advocate, and the author of Reading for Our Lives: A Literacy Action Plan from Birth to Six. Her website, MayaSmart.com, publishes new book lists, literacy activities, and other free family resources weekly to help parents play their dual roles as first teachers and educational advocates. She holds a master’s degree in journalism from the Medill School at Northwestern University and a bachelor’s in social studies with honors from Harvard University. She serves as affiliated faculty in Educational Policy and Leadership in the College of Education at Marquette University.

Blaire, Molly, and Maya discuss:

A light touch of language development every day - mentioning how a certain letter sounds or looks on the page, for example - is a great way to foster your child's reading skills, rather than spending hours drilling phonics flashcards one rainy weekend. Just keep engaging with them in a consistent way - that's a great start!

Here's where you can find Maya:

Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:

If you’re looking for self-care that’s quick and easy, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/LAUGHING. 

Misfits Market is an affordable online grocery service that makes shopping easy, quick, and fun. Visit get.misfitsmarket.com/toddlerpurgatory50 to get 50% off your first two orders when you use code LAUGHING50 by February 28, 2023. 

Try Peloton Tread Risk-Free with a 30-day home trial. New members only. Not available in remote locations. See additional terms at onepeloton.com/home-trial. 

Ready, Set, Food! helps prevent food allergies in children. Go to readysetfood.com/todpurgs & use code TODPURGS for 15% off your first order. 

Ritual’s Essential for Women 18 and up is a multivitamin you can actually trust. Visit ritual.com/toddler for 10% off during your first 3 months.

Zocdoc is the only FREE app that lets you find AND book doctors who are patient-reviewed, take your insurance, and are available when you need them. Go to Zocdoc.com/TODDLER and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This just in: violence in play is normal behavior. But today parents tend to take it more seriously. Here's why it's natural for kids to incorporate play-fighting with guns and swords into their games– and when to let it go versus intervene.

If something doesn't sit right with you, it's good to check in with kids about it later – but remember that kids use play as a way of processing the world.

Links! 

Virginia Sole-Smith for Parents Magazine: "Should Parents Be Concerned About Violent Play?"

Dan Shapiro for CHADD: "Children and Violent Behavior: Where it Comes From and What to Do"

Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys by Dan Kindlon, Ph.D. & Michael Thompson, Ph.D.

Under Deadman's Skin: Discovering the Meaning of Children's Violent Play by Jane Katch

Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:

If you’re looking for self-care that’s quick and easy, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/LAUGHING. 

Misfits Market is an affordable online grocery service that makes shopping easy, quick, and fun. Visit get.misfitsmarket.com/toddlerpurgatory50 to get 50% off your first two orders when you use code LAUGHING50 by February 28, 2023. 

Try Peloton Tread Risk-Free with a 30-day home trial. New members only. Not available in remote locations. See additional terms at onepeloton.com/home-trial. 

Ready, Set, Food! helps prevent food allergies in children. Go to readysetfood.com/todpurgs & use code TODPURGS for 15% off your first order. 

Ritual’s Essential for Women 18 and up is a multivitamin you can actually trust. Visit ritual.com/toddler for 10% off during your first 3 months.

Zocdoc is the only FREE app that lets you find AND book doctors who are patient-reviewed, take your insurance, and are available when you need them. Go to Zocdoc.com/TODDLER and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Feeling exhausted from keeping up with all of your responsibilities as a mother, partner, and professional? You may be experiencing mom burnout. Here's how to spot the signs and take baby steps towards climbing back out of the emotional, physical, and mental pit we sometimes find ourselves in.

Blaire and Molly discuss:

The resources available to moms in this situation vary greatly, but if you can, asking for help - from your partner, your boss, your friends, your relatives - is a great place to start. Burnout happens to so many moms and is nothing to be ashamed of, so give yourself a break, first and foremost.

Links!

Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:

If you’re looking for self-care that’s quick and easy, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/LAUGHING. 

Misfits Market is an affordable online grocery service that makes shopping easy, quick, and fun. Visit get.misfitsmarket.com/toddlerpurgatory50 to get 50% off your first two orders when you use code LAUGHING50 by February 28, 2023. 

Try Peloton Tread Risk-Free with a 30-day home trial. New members only. Not available in remote locations. See additional terms at onepeloton.com/home-trial. 

Ready, Set, Food! helps prevent food allergies in children. Go to readysetfood.com/todpurgs & use code TODPURGS for 15% off your first order. 

Ritual’s Essential for Women 18 and up is a multivitamin you can actually trust. Visit ritual.com/toddler for 10% off during your first 3 months.

Zocdoc is the only FREE app that lets you find AND book doctors who are patient-reviewed, take your insurance, and are available when you need them. Go to Zocdoc.com/TODDLER and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Wish someone would give you a pat on the back for keeping track of all the water bottles or knowing which dishes are dishwasher-safe? Grace Farris, author of "Mom Milestones," is here to give us moms the credit we deserve for the little things that no one else notices.

Grace Farris is a mom, doctor, and illustrator. Her work has appeared in the New York Times, Vogue, BuzzFeed, and Cup of Jo. The New York Times' Wirecutter called her book Mom Milestones “an affirming read for new moms in particular, a literary road map of the very-hard-but-very-good path that lies ahead.”

Grace, Molly, and Blaire discuss:

Here's where you can find Grace:

Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:

If you’re looking for self-care that’s quick and easy, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/LAUGHING. 

Misfits Market is an affordable online grocery service that makes shopping easy, quick, and fun. Visit get.misfitsmarket.com/toddlerpurgatory50 to get 50% off your first two orders when you use code LAUGHING50 by February 28, 2023. 

Try Peloton Tread Risk-Free with a 30-day home trial. New members only. Not available in remote locations. See additional terms at onepeloton.com/home-trial. 

Ready, Set, Food! helps prevent food allergies in children. Go to readysetfood.com/todpurgs & use code TODPURGS for 15% off your first order. 

Zocdoc is the only FREE app that lets you find AND book doctors who are patient-reviewed, take your insurance, and are available when you need them. Go to Zocdoc.com/TODDLER and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Do you look in your bank account and wonder where all your money has gone? We asked our listeners for the small ways they save and and budget every month to make money less of a mystery.

Molly and Blaire discuss:

Investing a little bit of time in some of these solutions reaps big rewards budget-wise, so seriously, start eensy teensy tiny. Look in your fridge to see what you need to use up before going to the store. Join Facebook Marketplace or your local "Buy Nothing" group. Budgeting is a muscle that you have to exercise consistently in order to get good at it, so give yourself some grace!

Here are all the resources we mentioned in the episode!

Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:

If you’re looking for self-care that’s quick and easy, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/LAUGHING. 

Misfits Market is an affordable online grocery service that makes shopping easy, quick, and fun. Visit get.misfitsmarket.com/toddlerpurgatory50 to get 50% off your first two orders when you use code LAUGHING50 by February 28, 2023. 

Try Peloton Tread Risk-Free with a 30-day home trial. New members only. Not available in remote locations. See additional terms at onepeloton.com/home-trial. 

Ready, Set, Food! helps prevent food allergies in children. Go to readysetfood.com/todpurgs & use code TODPURGS for 15% off your first order. 

Zocdoc is the only FREE app that lets you find AND book doctors who are patient-reviewed, take your insurance, and are available when you need them. Go to Zocdoc.com/TODDLER and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Are we creating unrealistic expectations when we praise our kid just for waking up in the morning? Turns out there is too much of a good thing, but we can also reframe how, when, and why we praise our kids.

Molly and Blaire discuss:

Kids can sense when praise isn't genuine. Instead of congratulating them on their every action and creating an unrealistic standard for praise in the future, focus on encouragement without value judgement or "I" statements.

Links!

Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:

If you’re looking for self-care that’s quick and easy, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/LAUGHING. 

Misfits Market is an affordable online grocery service that makes shopping easy, quick, and fun. Visit get.misfitsmarket.com/toddlerpurgatory50 to get 50% off your first two orders when you use code LAUGHING50 by February 28, 2023. 

Try Peloton Tread Risk-Free with a 30-day home trial. New members only. Not available in remote locations. See additional terms at onepeloton.com/home-trial. 

Ready, Set, Food! helps prevent food allergies in children. Go to readysetfood.com/todpurgs & use code TODPURGS for 15% off your first order. 

Zocdoc is the only FREE app that lets you find AND book doctors who are patient-reviewed, take your insurance, and are available when you need them. Go to Zocdoc.com/TODDLER and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sharing is caring, right? We were all raised to believe that sharing is an important part of polite social interactions. But as adults, we would be taken aback if abruptly asked to share something we were using, like our phone. So why do we insist that our kids share toys with complete strangers at a moment's notice? Here's when– and why– it's ok NOT to share.

Molly and Blaire discuss:

Role-playing with your child to practice polite yet assertive behavior is a great way to start the conversation about when and why it's appropriate to share.

Links!

Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:

If you’re looking for self-care that’s quick and easy, Athletic Greens is giving you a FREE 1-year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. Go to athleticgreens.com/LAUGHING. 

Misfits Market is an affordable online grocery service that makes shopping easy, quick, and fun. Visit get.misfitsmarket.com/toddlerpurgatory50 to get 50% off your first two orders when you use code LAUGHING50 by February 28, 2023. 

Try Peloton Tread Risk-Free with a 30-day home trial. New members only. Not available in remote locations. See additional terms at onepeloton.com/home-trial. 

Ready, Set, Food! helps prevent food allergies in children. Go to readysetfood.com/todpurgs & use code TODPURGS for 15% off your first order. 

Zocdoc is the only FREE app that lets you find AND book doctors who are patient-reviewed, take your insurance, and are available when you need them. Go to Zocdoc.com/TODDLER and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

As we look back on 2022, it's easy to focus on the things we didn't do or should have done. But today Molly and Blaire give themselves permission - and you too, dear listeners - to revel in all you and your kids have accomplished this year.

Molly and Blaire discuss:

It's so rewarding to see others recognize in your kids what you have worked so hard to instill in them. But it takes a long time before you see the resulting blooms of the seeds you've planted in your littles.

Special thanks to our sponsors for this month:

DockAtot is the premium lifestyle brand made for the modern parent, with elegant cushions, swaddlers, and more. Get 15% off at dockatot.com with the code LAUGHING.

Honeylove shapewear is the secret sauce you need for your everyday wardrobe. Get 20% off at honeylove.com with the code LAUGHING. 

Misfits Market is an affordable online grocery service that makes shopping easy, quick, and fun. Visit get.misfitsmarket.com/LAUGHING30 by Dec. 31st to get 30% off your first order.

Ready, Set, Food! helps prevent food allergies in children. Go to readysetfood.com/todpurgs & use code TODPURGS for 15% off your first order. 

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices