TonioTimeDaily

“Getting in the Mood

Getting in the mood is often both a physical and mental process for people. Not everybody is interested or ready for sex (any kind of sex) just because someone’s partner runs into a room and is like “Hey! Let’s have sex!” And so sometimes it takes specific activities to get people horny. There are no rules to which of these activities do or do not count as foreplay; whatever gets you in the mood is foreplay for you! So what kinds of things can people do to get in the mood? What activities or behaviours are good foreplay? These are good questions to ask yourself and your partners, but here are some ideas:

Getting Comfortable

Set the Scene: Flowers. Candles. A Sexy playlist. Sometimes cliches are actually great for making a moment feel more sensual! Other things to consider: Are the curtains closed? Did you brush your teeth? All of these things can contribute to the vibe of the space, which can affect how comfortable a person feels being intimate or vulnerable.

Get in the Zone: What do you need to do to feel ready and comfortable for sex? Some people like to take a bath or shower. Some people need a moment to themselves to decompress from a busy day. Try and figure out what helps you relax and focus on the sensations and activities you’re doing with your partner(s) in the moment.

Practicing Safer Sex: It can be difficult to feel comfortable during sex if you’re constantly stressing about getting pregnant or getting an STI. Using condoms, dental dams, or birth control can help put someone’s mind at ease and focus on the matter at hand (aka sex). For condoms specifically, it can help to incorporate them into your foreplay; try keeping them near where you have sex, or give yourself time to roll around after you put the condom on/in before any penetration. Just because a condom’s out of its package, doesn’t mean there’s a need to start rushing things.

Touching and More

Kissing: Foreplay doesn’t need to be elaborate or fancy. Some people just need a good amount of kissing to get in the mood. Consider making time for longer makeouts. You can also talk to your partner if it feels good to kiss places other than their mouths (like necks, ears, toes, bellies, etc.).

Massages: A massage can help relieve tension, as well as help partners feel more physically intimate. You don’t have to be an expert masseuse to rub someone’s shoulders or back or whatever it is that helps get them in the mood. There are also lots of body oils that people use to enhance the experience.

Oral Sex and Masturbation: While oral sex and and mutual masturbation are wonderful activities by themselves, lots of people engage in them as warm-up to things like penetrative sex. If this is the case for you, spend lots of time on oral sex or masturbation! Edging your partner (or yourself) in this way can help a lot in getting people in the mood, which can lead to things like greater vaginal lubrication or more confident erections.

Engage the 5 Senses: Foreplay doesn’t just have to be about touching. It can also be about tastes, smells, sights, and sounds. Think about incorporating things like massages, chocolate, candles, mood music, etc. These examples may be a bit cheesy, but finding the sensations that work for you and your partner(s) can also help get everyone in the mood.”

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“USING A RAINCHECK

When responding to your partner’s initiation for sex you want to first acknowledge their desire to be close to you by thanking them. This ensures that you are honoring where your partner is at and what they are feeling. Then you want to check in with yourself and see where you are at regarding saying yes to physical intimacy. If it’s a yes to their initiation, well then you can both go play. If it’s not a yes, then ask yourself why and let your partner know. This will honor your feelings and it gives you a voice in the negotiation. Then ask yourself what you can say yes to and when. You have options of negotiating a different intimate activity at that moment your partner initiates, to give a rain check to a different time, or rain check both a different activity and a different time. Negotiating a different activity can be any sort of physical intimacy that doesn’t have to end in penetration or orgasm. Perhaps it’s a yes to a naked massage or making out on the couch. These options for intimacy will be discussed further in my future blog featuring the letter “P”. If it’s a rain check to a different time, you need to make sure that you follow up at the end of the time you said. This means if you say “give me an hour to have some ‘me’ time and then I’ll be ready for intimacy” then by golly at the end of that hour you need to check back in with your partner. This is where you close the loop of the Intimacy Limbo Land and minimize the anxiety of your partner of when they get to be physically close to you and feel your love. When you constantly keep to your word of when you check back in, your partner will begin to learn that your availability is both reliable and dependable. This calms down those anxious thoughts and helps your partner to not keep anxiously reaching out to you.”

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“Preparing for BDSM Negotiation

If you’re new to negotiating, it might be helpful to do a little work on your own before you talk to a partner. A great tool for pre-negotiation is a yes/no/maybe list, which is a big list of things that you do or do not want to do, as well as what you might be interested in trying. These lists are a great way to organize all of your thoughts in one place, and if both you and your partner fill one out, you can reference each other’s lists to see where your kinks align. One of our favorites is by our friend Bex, and it includes not only ideas for sex and play, but also the types of language you may or may not want to be used, as well as feelings that you may or may not want to play with.

Bringing a prepared list of ideas written out on paper to a negotiation is helpful, especially if you’re anxious about forgetting things, or just having the talk in general. Another thing you might want to do is make sure you have ample time allocated the first time you negotiate—preferably not in the few minutes before your first scene! Setting aside a specific chunk of time to talk will help, as it can be easy to get lost in excitement or forget important information if you’re planning to play soon. Good Questions to Ask While Negotiating

As far as practical negotiation goes, we’ve gathered a list of specific questions to ask the first time we negotiate with a new partner.

What do you/don’t you want to do in our scene?

This is naturally the first question, as you’ll both want to know what kind of play you’re interested in getting up to! Take the time here to address your partner’s boundaries and limits when it comes to play. Here you also can discuss what kinds of toys you may want to use and whether or not you plan to engage in any sexual activity during the scene.

How do you want to feel?

This one is a bit more specific, where you can dig into the heart of how you want to feel during a scene. Some folks like to play in order to get into altered headspaces (sub or top space, puppy or little space, etc.) and it can help to know both what your partner wants to feel, and what gets them there. Some answers may look like: “I want to feel pleasure,” “I want to feel humiliated,” “I want to feel cherished,” “I want to feel dirty,” and so on.”

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“A U.S. District Court jury yesterday convicted three men of operating a criminal enterprise that used murder and intimidation to control drug sales in a Northeast Washington neighborhood.

Two other defendants, who prosecutors said also were members of the R Street Crew, were convicted of drug conspiracy and other charges.

The case, which took five months to try, has been watched by federal prosecutors and defense lawyers across the country because it was one of a few attempts, and the first in the District, to use sophisticated anti-racketeering laws against a suspected street drug gang.

Although the jurors acquitted all defendants of racketeering, defense lawyers said the prosecutors' strategy of using the law made it easier to include other crimes, such as murder, in the case and thus made their defense problems far more complex. As a practical matter, the racketeering acquittals had little effect because the jury voted to convict on the more serious offense of operating a continuing criminal enterprise. "Today's verdict is a tremendous victory for the people of the District of Columbia," said U.S. Attorney Jay B. Stephens. "It demonstrates our unrelenting commitment to use the full arsenal of laws available to us to bring to justice drug kingpins who are responsible for much of the human devastation affecting this community."

From the start of the trial, prosecutors portrayed the R Street defendants as high-rolling drug dealers who built an organization complete with enforcers, drug processors, distributors, lieutenants and street runners. The organization operated between 1983 and 1991, conducting much of its business near the corner of Lincoln Road and R Street NE.

Various witnesses described lavish spending sprees on Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills, Calif., high-speed chases in Mercedes-Benz sedans, three killings and an unsuccessful drive-by shooting attack on convicted drug kingpin Rayful Edmond III.”

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“Social services are a range of public services intended to provide support and assistance towards particular groups, which commonly include the disadvantaged.[1] They may be provided by individuals, private and independent organisations, or administered by a government agency.[1] Social services are connected with the concept of welfare and the welfare state, as countries with large welfare programs often provide a wide range of social services.[2] Social services are employed to address the wide range of needs of a society.[2] Prior to industrialisation, the provision of social services was largely confined to private organisations and charities, with the extent of its coverage also limited.[3] Social services are now generally regarded globally as a 'necessary function' of society and a mechanism through which governments may address societal issues.[4] The provision of social services by governments is linked to the belief of universal human rights, democratic principles, as well as religious and cultural values.[5] The availability and coverage of social services varies significantly within societies.[6][4] The main groups which social services is catered towards are: families, children, youths, elders, women, the sick and the disabled.[4] Social services consists of facilities and services such as: public education, welfare, infrastructure, mail, social work, food banks, universal health care, police, fire services, public transportation and public housing.[7][2] . Healthcare

Education

Police

Labour Laws

Fire Services

Insurance Laws

Food Banks

Charitable Organisations

Public Housing

Aged Care

Disability Services

Legal Aid

Youth Services

Crisis Support Services

Emergency Relief

Public Transportation

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“The District has approximately 60 open-air drug markets, some as large as two to three blocks, that are controlled by crews. Open-air markets are typically located near low-income housing projects and on main corridors into and out of the city. Most open-air markets operate 12 or more hours a day, 7 days a week. Crews sell primarily crack at open-air markets; however, powdered cocaine, heroin, marijuana, methamphetamine, and other dangerous drugs (ODDs) are also available. Law enforcement officials report that marijuana is available with increasing frequency at these markets. However, individual sales at open-air markets may involve no more than half a pound of marijuana because of legislation that became effective in D.C. in June 2001, making penalties for distribution and possession of marijuana much more severe than they had been previously.

Open-Air Drug Investigation in D.C.

On July 13, 2000, federal and local law enforcement officials arrested 37 individuals and seized $30,000 worth of crack, $70,000 in cash, and 13 guns, including an assault rifle and an Uzi-style weapon. The arrests and seizures were the result of a yearlong investigation that focused on open-air drug markets in the 1st, 3rd, and 5th Police Districts.

Source: Office of National Drug Control Policy, Drug Policy Information Clearinghouse, Washington, D.C., August 2000.

Local neighborhood-based crews that are unaffiliated with nationally recognized gangs usually dominate retail drug distribution in the District. Law enforcement officials usually assign the names by which crews are known based on the streets and housing developments in which members of crews live and distribute drugs. According to the Metropolitan Police Department, crews form primarily for economic gain and change composition regularly. Many crews distribute crack, and they frequently distribute other drugs as well. They maintain control of their markets by preventing nationally recognized street gangs from entering the area, and they will fight and kill to defend their "turf." No single crew appears to control or dominate the distribution of drugs throughout the District. Some reports indicate that as many as 150 crews, each averaging 20 to 30 members, distribute drugs and engage in additional criminal activities. The NDIC National Gang Survey 2000 identified 42 crews that distribute cocaine in D.C., and most of these crews distribute heroin and marijuana as well. Forty-one of them are African American, and one, La Mara R, is Hispanic.

Crews Known to Distribute Drugs in D.C.

1-5 Mob 1-7 Crew 1st & O Crew 1st & Seaton Place Crew

1st & T Street Crew 3rd World 5th & O Street Crew 6th & S Street Crew

7th & I Street Crew 7th & O Street Crew 7th & S Street Crew 7th & Taylor Crew

12th & Hamlin Street Crew 13th Street Crew 14th & Clifton Street Crew 20th Street Crew

57th Street Mob 58th Street Mob 1512 Crew 6200 Crew

Alabama Avenue Crew Barry Farms Crew The Circle/Simple City Crew Congress Park Crew

E Street Crew Hobart Stars Hucks Crew La Mara R

Langston Crew Levis Street Crew Lincoln Heights Crew Mellon Mob

Michigan Park Crew Montana Avenue Crew Naylor Road Crew Park Morton Crew

Queen Street Crew Rock Creek Church Crew Rosedale Crew Stanton Terrace Crew

Todd Place Crew Woodland Boys

Source: National Drug Intelligence Center, National Gang Survey 2000.”

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“Michael Anthony Salters, described by law enforcement officials as a drug dealer and mediator among competing District drug organizations, was shot and killed late Tuesday near First and Bryant streets NW when an unidentified gunman opened fire on Salters's car, D.C. police reported.

Salters's body, still inside his bullet-riddled car, was left outside the entrance to Washington Hospital Center shortly after 10:30 p.m. Tuesday, said 5th District Capt. James Coffey.

Salters was pronounced dead about 1 a.m. yesterday, said Officer Daniel Straub, a D.C. police spokesman. The police department released few details of the incident yesterday. Sources said Salters had been shot at least six times. Law enforcement sources said Salters was one of the city's largest drug dealers but that his real power was in his ability to referee turf disputes among rival drug dealers.

A law enforcement source said Salters had been implicated in drug deals of more than 200 pounds, but that he had proved too "well insulated" from direct involvement to be charged. Agents at times put Salters under intense surveillance, and interviewed drug dealers who said they had worked with and for him, law enforcement sources said. His name also came up in wiretapped conversations, they said.

Federal drug officials say they have been told by several drug dealers that some dealers ceded to Salters the power to assign drug territories for PCP, heroin, cocaine and other drugs.”

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“Ten members of a Southwest Washington street gang that authorities said has terrorized a housing complex for a decade with homicides, shootings and armed kidnappings have been indicted for their alleged participation in a "violent marijuana distribution conspiracy," U.S. Attorney Wilma A. Lewis said yesterday.

The defendants -- all males ages 22 to 35 -- were indicted on 87 counts of racketeering and narcotics-related charges, including allegations that gang members killed two people who were government witnesses against the group. The federal indictment was unsealed yesterday.

The joint federal-local investigation focused on violence spawned by the marijuana sales at the Greenleaf Gardens housing complex in Southwest. The men charged yesterday were members of the K Street Crew, a neighborhood gang that waged feuds with rival drug gangs, such as the L Street Crew, whose federal racketeering trial is scheduled for January. At a news conference yesterday, standing beside a chart that listed the names of 31 victims of shootings -- including 13 homicides -- attributed to the K Street Crew, Lewis said: "This is a clear example of why marijuana use and dealing cannot -- I repeat, cannot -- simply be viewed as a harmless activity or a victimless crime."

Prosecutors said the K Street Crew carried out at least 13 killings from 1989 to 1996, as well as numerous shootings, robberies and other crimes. The victims were not limited to rival gang members or people who did not pay drug debts, according to the 77-page indictment.

Crew members staked out the area surrounding the 200 block of K Street SW as their territory, authorities said. To protect themselves and their business, they carried semiautomatic weapons and often wore bulletproof vests, investigators said.”

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giving and sharing

courteous,

courtly,

gallant,

gracious,

polite

diplomatic,

tactful

deferential,

dutiful,

obliging,

regardful,

respectful

altruistic,

beneficent,

benevolent,

benignant,

humane,

selfless,

unselfish

charitable,

generous,

magnanimous

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In the church world, adultery and homosexuality are foolishly conflated with rape. The toxic forgiveness of the church is why they are quick to fight for the pastor, have pregnant females announce to the congregation about “their repentance of their sins” without the male who impregnated her to be found, deacon and trustees secretly moving preachers to different parishes and churches once they are discovered to being predators, church members turning prayer requests into gossip columns in the pulpit, church members shoving their Biblicism in the faces of other church members, deacon boards hiding the evidence of knowing predatory preachers being themselves while hiring them to join the cloth membership, the possibility of Bible writers using real people to interact with non-historical figures in the canonical scriptures, church leadership emphasizing church membership over Jesus ministry partnership, and congregants bashing females for the sexual perversions and violent acts of males.

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