TonioTimeDaily

“Common phrases gaslighters may use:

"I never said that."

"I did that because I love you."

"I don't know why you're making such a huge deal of this."

"You're being overly sensitive."

"You are being dramatic."

"You are the issue, not me."

"If you loved me, you would..."

"You are crazy."

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“Here, in a nutshell, are seven characteristics that should alert you that a psychopathic personality might be in your sights.

Superficial Charm. ...

Puffed-Up Self-Esteem. ...

Deceitfulness. ...

Shallow Emotions. ...

Boredom and a Need for Stimulation. ...

A History of Shady Conduct. ...

A Riddle of Contradictions.”

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“Sociopathy refers to a pattern of antisocial behaviors and attitudes, including manipulation, deceit, aggression, and a lack of empathy for others. Sociopathy is a non-diagnostic term, and it is not synonymous with "psychopathy," though the overlap leads to frequent confusion. Sociopaths may or may not break the law, but by exploiting and manipulating others, they violate the trust that the human enterprise runs on.”

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“Extremism is "the quality or state of being extreme" or "the advocacy of extreme measures or views".[1] The term is primarily used in a political or religious sense to refer to an ideology that is considered (by the speaker or by some implied shared social consensus) to be far outside the mainstream attitudes of society.[2] It can also be used in an economic context. The term may be used pejoratively by opposing groups, but is also used in academic and journalistic circles in a purely descriptive and non-condemning sense.

Extremists' views are typically contrasted with those of moderates. In Western countries for example, in contemporary discourse on Islam or on Islamic political movements, the distinction between extremist and moderate Muslims is commonly stressed. Political agendas perceived as extremist often include those from the far-left politics or far-right politics, as well as radicalism, reactionism, chauvinism, fundamentalism, and fanaticism.

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“It takes spending time together and engaging in lots of honest, open communication to make sure that the CERTS conditions are operating in your relationship. That's why it is important to build a strong friendship with a partner first, before becoming lovers.

Meeting the CERTS conditions does not ensure that you'll experience terrific sex, but it can help you feel more secure knowing you've minimized the possibility of something bad resulting from the sexual experience.”

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“Wendy Maltz developed the CERTS model for healthy sex; this model requires that the following conditions be met for a person to enjoy healthy & satisfying sex: Consent, Equality, Respect, Trust, and Safety. means you can freely and comfortably choose whether or not to engage in sexual activity.”

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“Psychosis is a condition of the mind that results in difficulties determining what is real and what is not real.[3] Symptoms may include delusions and hallucinations, among other features.[3] Additional symptoms are incoherent speech and behavior that is inappropriate for a given situation.[3] There may also be sleep problems, social withdrawal, lack of motivation, and difficulties carrying out daily activities.[3] Psychosis can have serious adverse outcomes.[3] As with many psychiatric phenomena, psychosis has several different causes.[4] These include mental illness, such as schizophrenia or schizoaffective disorder, bipolar disorder, sensory deprivation[5] and in rare cases, major depression (psychotic depression).”

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I saw all of these as a child in some churches: “Religious Trauma Symptoms

Symptoms of religious trauma include:4

Poor critical thinking skills

Difficulty making decisions

Decreased sense of self-worth

Difficulty building strong relationships

Being unfamiliar with mainstream culture/isolation

Struggling with fitting in and belonging

Nightmares

Sleeping issues

Eating issues

Sexual dysfunction

Anxiety symptoms

Depression symptoms

Grief symptoms

Loneliness.”

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“1. Set ground rules with your partner. To engage in healthy BDSM play, you and your partner should both agree on what you’re comfortable with before you begin—nobody should feel pressured into a particular role or feel as if they don’t have a choice. Have an open and honest dialogue with your partner about the roles you’re each drawn toward so that you both feel comfortable and confident experimenting. If you’re too nervous about bringing it up directly and you’re curious about your partner’s interest levels, consider watching light BDSM erotica together to broach the subject. Learn how to talk about sex with your partner.

2. Select a safe word. Trust and mutual consent between one or more partners are the foundation of BDSM. However, it may be hard to distinguish between playful banter and an honest request to slow down or stop the experience in the middle of a session. Every BDSM practitioner should establish at least one safe word with their partner—something either person can say to signal that a boundary has been crossed and a break is necessary. Additionally, you and your partner can choose two different safe words—one that signals a stop in action and another that signals you’re coming close to a boundary and should ease off or move the session in a different direction.

3. Brainstorm roleplaying ideas. If you’re unsure how to begin a BDSM relationship with your partner or feeling self-conscious, consider some roleplay scenarios that can help jumpstart the action. Boss and employee, teacher and student, doctor and patient, or two strangers are all roles that you can take on to help distance yourself from the situation, which can be a great way to help you get over stage fright so that you can relax and enjoy yourself.

4. Start small. If you’re new to BDSM, avoid buying a complicated rope system or a fancy leather outfit. Instead, let yourself ease in to see if this form of sex play suits you and your partner. Try light BDSM activities for starters; many discipline or D/s sessions only require two willing participants and some imagination. If you want to buy equipment, a blindfold and some wrist restraints are useful, inexpensive items that you can continue to use if you determine that hardcore BDSM activities are not for you.

5. Understand risk. There are two main schools of thought regarding how to treat risk during sessions—the “safe, sane, and consensual” model (SSC) and the “risk-aware consensual kink” model (RACK). Those who follow the SSC model emphasize safety, sticking to activities that you and your partner have designated as “safe” beforehand. Those who follow the RACK model believe that the word “safe” is problematic because most BDSM activities are inherently risky and that emphasizing safety takes away participants’ freedom to evaluate risk on their own or engage in higher-risk BDSM play. For those who follow the RACK model, the responsibility to determine risk and comfort is with each individual—making explicit consent even more crucial.

6. Aftercare is key. Many sexual activities—and BDSM sessions in particular—can be physically or emotionally intense for both participants, so partners must engage in healthy aftercare following the sexual experience. Discussion, cuddling, and cleaning up together are great ways to help everyone wind down and process the session, fostering a sense of calm, physical wellness, and emotional well-being.” I never paid for sex in the past, I accepted legal job money only from past lovers as a way of being nice to me.

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“Signs of Self-Loathing

While self-loathing can take many forms, it typically involves neglecting oneself, having a lack of self-compassion, sabotaging personal success, and trusting others more than trusting oneself. Many people who experience self-loathing refuse to accept compliments and praise, or simply dismiss them when received. Those with self-hatred also tend to experience low self-esteem, believing they have deficits that others may not notice.

Signs of self-loathing may include:

Low self-esteem

Thinking you’re not good enough

Lack of self-compassion

Critical self-talk

Isolating

Neglecting yourself and your needs (e.g., not eating enough or eating too much, not getting enough sleep)

Sabotaging success

Seeking reassurance

Refusing to accept or ignoring compliments or praise

Focusing on the negative

Catastrophizing

Ruminating

Trusting others more than trusting yourself

Engaging in unhealthy habits such as substance use, self-harm, or risky sex

Refusing to get help.”

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