That we start by discussing Cinderalla’s no-no hole should tell you this isn’t your parents idea of a fairy story. I’m joined by Nona to go over the many, many, MANY! different levels to this movie, leading to the longest “spoiler zone” yet.

Written and directed by Emilie Blichfeldt, (feature-length directorial debut), The Ugly Stepsister introduces Lea Myren, and also stars Thea Sofie Loch Næss (The Last Kingdom) and Ane Dahl Torp (The Wave).

Classic fairy tales are known to be far more sinister than their more well known animated interpretations, and Emilie Blichfeldt's The Ugly Stepsistercertainly promises to swing the pendulum back towards the grisly. A homage to Charles Perrault's Cinderella, The Ugly Stepsister is a dark and gruesome adaptation of the classic story where you truly find out exactly how much pain beauty is.

Elvira (Lea Myren) has one all-consuming obsession: to win the affection of her kingdom’s handsome prince and live happily ever after. Yet, she lives in the shadow of her beautiful stepsister, Agnes (Thea Sofie Loch Næss), who seems fated for the happy ending she’s always dreamed of. But, in a kingdom where beauty is prized above all things, Elvira will get what she wants, no matter what…

Nona Things

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Tatami: OutrunTatami: Midnight Drive

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Trigger Warning: Middle aged men remember their youth

Record Store Day comes once a year and instead of just repeating what we said last year, I’ve decided to put on a battle of the movie bands contest and invited Rob Jones and Captain J Spaulding on to judge who is worthy and who not worthy of the title

On this episode, Memories… fear, anger, rage, all the things that lead to the dark side

(Substack has annoyingly capped podcasts at an hour so rather than one big long episode it’s being cut into two parts. It’s not me trying to milk the audience for downloads I promise)

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Captain J Spaulding - Bluesky

Rob Jones on Substack

Tatami: OutrunTatami: Midnight Drive

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Trigger Warning: Middle aged men remember their youth

Record Store Day comes once a year and instead of just repeating what we said last year, I’ve decided to put on a battle of the movie bands contest and invited Rob Jones and Captain J Spaulding on to judge who is worthy and who not worthy of the title

On this episode, Bunton Watch, Free Neil Gaiman records, the first bracket of the competition. Vampires, Muppets and Dicks…. Oh MY!

(Substack has annoyingly capped podcasts at an hour so rather than one big long episode it’s being cut into two parts. It’s not me trying to milk the audience for downloads I promise)

TotalCultZone.com for all my stuff

[email protected] - To Direct message without that social media guff

Captain J Spaulding - Bluesky

Rob Jones on Substack

Tatami: OutrunTatami: Midnight Drive

Music from Uppbeathttps://uppbeat.io/t/tatami/outrun

License code: WL5SKQKGCYUROHRMLicense code: I27A9WQID9MEZUKO

Nona is back and still eating cake, it’s almost like she never went away. This time around though the film features mid 00’s star Heather Graham, starring, writing and directing in her 2nd feature film attempt “Chosen Family”. She’s got help with a whole host of people you know from other things but will need to consult IMDB to remind you exactly where from and, playing her sister, Clio… who is on drugs…. Julia Stiles.

To say we go on a journey watching this film is an understatement and, I don’t just mean down to the local drug alleyway to score drugs with her sister… who is on drugs.

Yoga teacher Ann is trying to find inner peace despite having a manic family a miserable dating life and an inability to say no that keeps her busy trying to fix everyone else's problems.

Chosen Family will be available on Digital Download from 21st April

Nona Things

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Tatami: OutrunTatami: Midnight Drive

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This week I am joined by Mark and Joe to talk about a charming little brit sci fi film about time travelling in Muswell Hill.

Time Travel Is Dangerous is a quintessentially British comedy, blending witty dialogue, quirky characters and a touch of the absurd with a heartwarming core.

The ensemble cast surround best friends and shop owners Ruth Syratt and Megan Stevenson, who play characters based on themselves, bringing their own vibrant personalities and undeniable chemistry to the screen. The film is set around their actual Muswell Hill vintage shop ChaChaCha, bringing a real-life documentary element to the sci-fi mockumentary.

Best friends Ruth and Megan run a vintage shop in Muswell Hill. When they stumble across a time machine, it occurs to them that stock is much cheaper if they ‘borrow’ from the past - well, it’s free. They don't want to change history, or rob banks, they just want to find a nice Victorian lamp or authentic 80s bum bag without getting sucked into the hellish time-space vortex that is “the Unreason”. The thing is, Time Travel Is Dangerous.TOTALCULTZONE.COM

Hallmark of Greatness Stuff

100 Things stuff

Cult Connections stuff (sadly missed the recording)

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Tatami: OutrunTatami: Midnight Drive

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I am now cursed to watch Lindsay Lohan movies till the end of time, fortunately I have Nona to keep me company while I do so. Join us as we eat cake and talk about the newest slice of Lohan offered up by Netflix (it’s a little odd covering a Christmas movie in March admittedly but we’d better get it out of the way before Freakier Friday comes out )

Check out the rest of the episodes hereLindsay Lohan Pt.1 "the Mean Girl"Lindsay Lohan Pt.2 "I know who killed my career"Lindsay Lohan Pt.3 "The Lohanaissance"

Nona Things

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Our Little Secret is a 2024 American romantic comedy film directed by Stephen Herek and written by Hailey DeDominicis. It stars Lindsay Lohan, alongside an ensemble cast featuring Ian Harding, Tim Meadows, Jon Rudnitsky, Judy Reyes, Henry Czerny, Chris Parnell, and Kristin Chenoweth. The film was a part of Lohan's creative partnership with Netflix, under which she also executive produced the project.

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Tatami: OutrunTatami: Midnight Drive

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It’s a rare solo show as I’m off for a few weeks to do some bits. I’m leaving you with a fistfull of films to be getting on with. Films! you may not have heard of that I’ve watched on the Mubi Streaming service

Films…. that are all in a different language so make zero sense on a podcast if you’re one of them rubbish monolingualists

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Tatami: OutrunTatami: Midnight Drive

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This week, I sink to new depths as we cover what is considered to be the worst British film ever made, The 2004 film adaptation of the Viz comic strip, The Fat Slags.

Join Me, Joe (Hallmark of Greatness) and Ian (Cult Connections) as we question our life choices in watching this movie. a Film that among it’s B/C list pop culture celebrities down on their luck and needing a paycheck, also features the unlikely combination of Dolph Lundgren and Les Dennis in it’s cast list.

FeaturingFiona AllenSophie ThompsonTom Goodman-HillJerry O’ConnellAnthony HeadGeri HalliwellJames DreyfusNaomi CambellAngus DeaytonPunt and DennisSimon FarnabyRalf LittleHelen LedererEamonn HolmesSarah CawoodANDBURT KWOUK

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Cult Connections Stuff

Hallmark of Greatness Stuff

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Tatami: OutrunTatami: Midnight Drive

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This week a film you maybe wouldn’t have seen, unless you’re into Non Fungible Tokens or Griftcoins. I’m joined by Tyrants in training Host Kevin Ryan, who quite rightly is wondering why the hell I sent this thing to him.

Kevins LinksTyrants PodcastBluesky

My stuffTotalcultzone.com

Killroy was here! A babysitter tells a little girl several terrifying stories about Killroy, a vicious killer behind the famous graffiti. The NFT Kevin Smith horror anthology writen with Andy McElfresh who co-hosts the Edumacation Podcast with Smith. The film stars Harley Quinn Smith, Ralph Garman and Chris Jericho. It is available only as an NFT…. but you may be able to find it elsewhere online…. I’ve sold mine already for .350 ETH

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Tatami: OutrunTatami: Midnight Drive

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I’m once again joined by the man who completed shudder, Captain J Spaulding. As we check out “The Damned”, a chilling trip to the middle of nowhere in the 1800’s, Which doesn’t seem all that far away once we start thinking about it.

We also touch upon 2 versions of Nosferatu, Lily Rose Depps giant forehead and Willem Dafoes giant penis… if only

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Captain J Spaulding - Bluesky

The Damned will be released in UK and Irish cinemas from 10th January 2025.

Starring Odessa Young (The Staircase, Mothering Sunday) and Joe Cole (Peaky Blinders, Gangs of London), The Damned is a tense psychological horror film that follows 19th-century widow, Eva. Tasked with making an impossible choice when a ship sinks off the coast of her isolated fishing outpost during the middle of an especially cruel winter.

With provisions running low, Eva and her close-knit community must choose between rescuing the shipwrecked crew and prioritizing their own survival. Facing the consequences of their decision and tormented by guilt, the inhabitants wrestle with a mounting sense of dread and begin to believe they are all being punished for their choices.

Following its premiere in November, the Cork International Film Festival 2024 awarded an Honourable Mention to The Damned commenting 'The Damned is a juggernaut of a film, breathing fresh life into a well-trodden genre. Its powerful use of the landscape and compelling performances make it truly deserving of this Special Mention.'Inspired by the Westfjords of Iceland in the 1800s, The Damned takes place in an unforgiving, almost unliveable setting, yet one that is steeped in immense beauty and turbulent folklore.

For director Thordur Palsson (The Valhalla Murders), himself a native Icelander, it was this folklore and mythology that led him to develop the idea that would later become The Damned. Growing up in Iceland, family members would often share gruesome tales of ghosts, demons and evil spirits.

Rooted in the depths of Norse Mythology, The Damned features haunting performances from Rory McCann (Game of Thrones), Siobhan Finneran (Happy Valley), Turlough Convery (Belfast), Lewis Gribben (Somewhere Boy), Francis Magee (The Tourist) and Mícheál Óg Lane (Calvary).

Tatami: OutrunTatami: Midnight Drive

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#thedamned #nordic #nosferatu