Tough Love

Paul Bulos is a publishing professional, an Executive, Leadership & Wellbeing Coach, a husband, and a father of two children. He has lived with anxiety since he was a young man.

Following the sudden loss of his father at a time when he'd just become a father himself, he developed a desperate need to keep his family safe that manifested itself through unhelpful behaviours.

Today Paul has learned to manage his anxiety but it's very much an ongoing process full of pitfalls. 

In this episode, we discuss a specific type of anxiety a growing number of men in their thirties and forties seem to experience about the roles and responsibilities they have in their families, their communities and in society in general.

Follow Paul on Twitter @BooBooBulos and check out his articles here and here.

You can also contact him through his website: the Complete Coach

The book: Don Miguel Ruiz's The Four Agreements

In the episode we also mention Jo Simpson, coach and author of the book, The Restless Executive. 

If you enjoy the podcast, don't forget to subscribe, share and review.

Follow us on Twitter @toughlovepc or on Instagram @missleonardis

 

Buck Angel is a transexual activist, entrepreneur, motivational speaker, YouTuber and many more other things. 

Born female, Buck was diagnosed with gender dysphoria in his twenties after a tumultuous adolescence. Now in his late fifties, he speaks candidly about his transition to become a man and how that cured his dysphoria. 

In this episode we talk about being a guinea pig, almost becoming a supermodel and the importance of taking ownership of your own life. 

Follow Buck on Twitter @BuckAngel or subscribe to his YouTube channel 

Check out Rachel Mason's documentary: Circus of Books

The book: Leslie Feinberg's Stone Butch Blues

If you enjoy the podcast, don't forget to subscribe, share and review.

Follow us on Twitter @toughlovepc or on Instagram @missleonardis

In her early twenties, homeless and addicted to drugs, Robin sought treatment for an STD.

Scared and confused, and completely unaware of being pregnant, what Robin didn't realise was that she'd been given drugs to terminate the pregnancy.

After years she's finally made peace with what she's done and what she's lost.

In this episode Robin and I talk about the role of faith in her healing, the importance of having a pro-choice/pro-life debate and the reaction to that Tweet.

Follow Robin on Twitter: @truthagape

The book: Karen A. Allison's Healing the Hurt that Won't Heal

The resources: 

Abortion Testimonials

Deeper Still Retreats

Rachel's Vineyard Retreats

If you enjoy the podcast, don't forget to subscribe, share and review.

Follow us on Twitter @toughlovepc or on Instagram @missleonardis

As a teenager, Eliza had big dreams. However, within 48 hours of arriving in LA, the man who had promised to make her a star had sold her to another man in Hollywood for $500.

This was only the beginning of an ordeal that was to last for over 15 years.

Today Eliza is an advocate for survivors of human trafficking, sex trafficking and child trafficking.

In this episode, Eliza and I discuss why she's the queen of bouncebacks, the importance of taking personal responsibility and how being difficult saved her life.

The book: Jordan B. Peterson’s 12 Rules For Life: An Antidote to Chaos

Follow Eliza on Twitter @elizableu.

If you want to find out more about human trafficking and how you can help or receive support, below is a list of resources mostly for the US which is where Eliza is based:

Global Modern Slavery Directory

RAINN

National Domestic Hotline

National Human Trafficking Hotline

If you enjoy the podcast, don't forget to subscribe, share and review.

Follow us on Twitter @toughlovepc or on Instagram @missleonardis

At the age of seven, Somali-born nurse Hoda Ali was subjected to type 3 female genital mutilation (FGM), alongside her six-years-old sister.

At the age of eleven, with Somalia on the bring of civil war, Hoda started experiencing severe medical complications as a consequence of the cutting. She was in and out of hospital for the following six years and eventually ended in the UK as a refugee. The numerous complications still affect her today, over thirty years later.

In this episode Hoda and I talk about how we all bleed the same colour, the importance of calling things by their name, and why she thinks she’s the luckiest girl alive.

Here’s the article Hoda wrote about Keur Simbara, a village in Senegal that has successfully put a stop to female genital mutilation.

This is the book that in 1999 planted the seed that I could survive whatever fate put on my path: Waris Dirie's Desert Flower

The book: Laura Dodsworth's Womanhood: the bare reality and the documentary: 100 Vaginas

If you want to find out more about FGM and how you can help or receive support, below is a list of resources mentioned in the episode:

The Vavengers: a UK-based charity led by FGM survivors, that bring communities together using the arts to speak what is often unspeakable and transform singular experiences into shared action.

John Lyon’s Charity: this is the charity Hoda works with.

The Orchid Project: an NGO catalysing the global movement to end female genital cutting.

The Dahlia Project: a clinic that provides psychological support to women affected by FGM founded by Dr Leyla Hussein OBE.

The Magool Foundation: a charity founded by Dr Leyla Hussein OBE to promote the rights and well being of girls and women especially those who have experienced or are at risk from female genital mutilation (FGM)

Aissa Edon's TED talk

Hoda's interview for Ealing Council

28TooMany: a registered charity established in 2010 by Dr. Ann-Marie Wilson to undertake research and provide knowledge and tools to those working to end FGM.

If you enjoy the podcast, don't forget to subscribe, share and review.

Follow us on Twitter @toughlovepc or on Instagram @missleonardis

 

This Bonus Episode is an origin story of sorts. In it I reflect on my personal trauma, why I started the podcast and why it's called Tough Love (Spoiler Alert: it's because of my favourite teacher). Tough Love is taking a short break and will be back on the 3rd September with more inspiring stories.   Follow us on Twitter @toughlovepc or on Instagram @missleonardis

After a normal pregnancy but a difficult birth, Susannah’s baby, Arthur, passed away just three days after being born. For a pregnant woman, this is the worst case scenario.   So, what does it take to move beyond the engulfing grief? Is it even possible to do?   In this episode we talk about the importance of having a community, why after something like this happens you’ll never look at statistics quite in the same way, and about the big difference made by telling people exactly what you need.   The book: L.M. Montgomery’s Anne’s House of Dreams and Andrew Solomon’s Far from the Tree   Follow Susannah on Twitter @serhamilton.   If you're going or you've gone through a similar experience to Susannah's and you're looking for support and information on what to do, here are some organisations that can help: Leo’s Neonatal Sands Tommy’s Mind Thrive: Gardening for Mental Health   If you enjoy the podcast, don't forget to subscribe, share and review.   Follow us on Twitter @toughlovepc or on Instagram @missleonardis

How do you recover physically from a stroke that left you unable to blink or swallow, let alone speak or walk? How do you move past the anger, the resentment, and the fear you’ve become a burden to the people you love?   At the age of twenty-four, occupational therapist Emma was a keen traveller and an avid runner. When surgery to remove a malformation in her brain went wrong, the subsequent stroke robbed Emma of life as she knew it.   Fifteen years later, Emma has come a long way in her physical and emotional rehabilitation. She now lives with her dog, Gilbert, and in addition to her job as an occupational therapist she gives inspirational talks about her experience.   The book: Emma Gee’s Reinventing Emma   Find more about Emma on her website and follow her on Twitter @egee1 and on Facebook EmmaGeecom   If you enjoy the podcast, don't forget to subscribe, share and review.   Follow us on Twitter @toughlovepc or on Instagram @missleonardis

How do you begin to recover from an addiction that has plagued you for over twenty years? Lisa started drinking at the age of seven, developed a dependency at eleven and got herself on the way to recovery at thirty-four. Fifteen years later Lisa is now a yoga therapist helping other people in recovery. In this episode, we talk about growing up in East London in the 70s, about arrested development and about how helping others gives her the strength to stay clean and sober.   Follow Lisa on Instagram @horwelllisa or on Facebook thegratefulretreat   The book(s): James Frey’s A Million Little Pieces, Anthony Kiedis’s Scar Tissue, Johann Hari’s Chasing the Scream and Lost Connections.   Check out her retreats in Brittany - France on her website or email her on [email protected]   If you're looking for looking for information on or support with addiction go to: www.ukna.org www.alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk/aa-meetings/find-a-meeting   Don't forget to subscribe, share and review.   Follow us on Twitter @missleonardis

How do you learn to trust yourself again as a mother after the lines between reality and allucination become blurred? And where does one learn how to be a mother? When her son was three months old, Catherine Cho, author of the memoir 'Inferno', experienced a psychotic episode while travelling to visit family. The journey to recovery meant time in hospital and several months on medication.   In this episode we talk about mental health and motherhood, about the mothers that came before us, and about what it took to build a bond with her son.   Buy Catherine's book Inferno and follow Catherine on Twitter @catkcho   The book: Laura Ingalls Wilder's Little House in the Big Woods (Little House on the Prairie book 1)   If you're looking for information or support for Postpartum Psychosis go to https://www.app-network.org/   Don't forget to subscribe, share and review.   Follow us on Twitter @toughlovepc or on Instagram @missleonardis