Transforming Monday

We've all felt that way...that we're the only ones keeping a positive outlook while everyone else around us is spewing negativity like a 76 Datsun burning oil. Admittedly, it's difficult. That's where the power of visualization and the encouragement of sharing your story with others who are now going through, or have been through, what you're dealing with right now.

Misery loves company, that's true. Yet it can also be the strongest foundation to build community on.

A special Independence Day Weekend episode of Transformation Radio. The year is half over, and where are you on meeting your goals, your New Year's Resolutions? Are you still stuck in the same routines? Did you start out like gangbusters but fall back into your old patterns? Well, take this weekend to declare your independence from all the bullshit in your past, from having to be someone everyone else expects you to be, from all those things holding you back.

I'm gonna share a little secret. I'm not perfect. I screw up from time to time, but recently I screwed up...big time...that sort of life altering screw up.

Hear how badly I screwed up, how I got to the point I screwed up, and how I, and you, can begin to repair the damage, learn the lesson, and discover how to recognize when you're headed for disaster.

Eventually we're all going to run into periods where we begin to doubt our growth, our change, when relationships that are very near and dear to us cause us to doubt ourselves.

Grieving the change in or even the loss of those relationships is a very real thing. Listen to hear my story about grieving the change in my relationships with my parents and how I'm dealing with it.

When wondering why we're treated so horribly by bosses, coworkers, family, friends, significant others.... it's often because we've taught them it's ok to treat us that way. Our standards are too low, we demand too little of ourselves, and we allow ourselves to be treated poorly.

In this episode, I share how I allowed myself to be treated like someone's "Plan B" for years, how I got out of it, and what awesome stuff happened once I demanded more of myself and from others.

Control freaks and micromanagers. We all know one, live with one, work with or for one, or are one. The question is "why is controlling how things are done a bad thing?" Well, it's demotivating to your family, your employees, your friends. It erodes trust in the superior/subordinate relationship. It builds resentment between spouses or between parents and children.

Is your need to have things done "your way" more important than the relationship you're trying to control? If it is, then you're doing it wrong.

Listen as I talk about my own experiences working for micromanagers, overcoming my own need to control, and how you can salvage sanity in times of "control stress".

Conflict is unavoidable. Parent/Child, Supervisor/Subordinate, all relationships will inevitably face conflict. The question is, how can you manage conflict without it destroying or damaging the relationship.

Listen to Christian explain some simple rules and simple techniques for managing conflict and dealing with people looking to be confrontational.

Analytical types typically suffer from paralysis by analysis. They always need more data, more comparisons, more thing to think about before they make a decision. Naturally, the decision rarely comes and the thinker believes they're making progress as long as more data is collected. The problem is that this isn't progress, it's imaginary momentum.

Momentum only comes from action, not from analysis. The best way to get momentum is to start making decisions, taking action, and following through. Even if it's just deciding what you're going to eat and taking the action to eat it, that creates more momentum than thinking about it.

The ability to reframe, or repurpose, negative events in your life is a skill everyone should learn. Being able to reframe the "crap" that happens to us allows us to get beyond defining ourselves as those events, and turn them into learning experiences. On this episode, Charlotte and I teach you what happens subconsciously when an event happens, how we end up defining ourselves as those events, and how and what you can change.

This is a skill that can be used for events caused by our choices, events caused by other people's choices, and by events completely out of our control. It's a skill that adults and children should learn.

Don't try to win over the haters...You're not the jackass whisperer!

As you continue along your personal development journey and continue to grow, continue to gain confidence, continue to become more decisive, more self assured, you're virtually guaranteed to pick up some haters. Whether they're friends, acquaintances, or even family, there are going to be those who are resentful of you because you aren't who you used to be.

Don't try to win them over... you can't. All you can be is who you are, and that's not the jackass whisperer.