Ancient Egypt may never stop fascinating us modern types, but as archeologists in recent centuries began to explore the ruined temples and tombs of one of humanity's oldest civilizations, they unearthed a puzzle: what had led to the seemingly violent attempt to erase a pharaoh whose monuments - intact or destroyed - were some of the finest works ever found?

When they learned that Pharaoh Hatshepsut was a woman, their 18th and 19th century brains curdled, coming up with a story of an evil queen who stole her power from the rightful heir. None of this was true. Hatshepsut strode across her world's stage at a moment of rising stability and prosperity in Egypt, and added to it, preserving the throne as regent to a two-year old Pharaoh Thutmose III, and co-reigning alongside him as he matured into one of Egypt's greatest military leaders and pharaohs himself.

Hatshepsut's reign widened the possibilities for a kingdom on the cusp of a Golden Age, and gifted humanity with some of the most marvelous pieces of antiquity discovered yet.

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The House of Grimaldi has ruled the tiny principality of Monaco since January 8, 1297, when Francois “The Spiteful” Grimaldi disguised himself as a monk and knocked on his uncle’s castle door, launching a coup. In the violence that followed, according to legend, a woman – possibly a lover of Francois, possibly a witch he had wronged (can’t it be both?) – issued a curse that has resonated across the centuries: “Never will a Grimaldi find true happiness in marriage.”

The Grimaldi family was considered scandalous enough in Queen Victoria’s time that she forbade any of her close relatives to marry into it, leading Prince Albert I of Monaco to marry an American heiress in 1889 – a precedent that would matter decades later when Prince Rainier III, urged on by none other than shipping tycoon Aristotle Onassis, began interviewing Hollywood A-listers for a very special role: Princess of Monaco. Which is how Grace Kelly abandoned the big screen for the Rock of Monaco, and would go on to celebrate her 40th birthday in High Scorpio style.

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Sources:

The Grimaldis of Monaco: Centuries of Scandal, Years of Grace, by Anne Edwards (Amazon)

Grace: The Secret Lives of a Princess, by James Spada (Amazon)

Elizabeth Taylor: There is Nothing Like a Dame, by Darwin Porter and Danforth Prince (Amazon)

A Detailed Look at the Many Romances of Prince Albert of Monaco (esquiremag.ph)

Portrait of Princess Caroline: Love and Philanthropy (hellomonaco.com)

Who is Giving Prince Ernst August a little TLC During his Marital Strife? (vanityfair.com)

Is Princess Caroline the Latest Victim of the Grimaldi Family Curse? (vanityfair.com)

A Runaway Princess Bride and Feudal Feuds: Three Insane Royal Weddings (vanityfair.com)

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In this episode, Alicia spills all the details of this possibly cursed pearl, La Peregrina, which was the largest pearl ever found when it was pulled from Panamanian waters. It would spend centuries bothering Europe's first families before an English Duke gave it to Sotheby's for auction in 1969, and the legend of La Peregrina gained a brand-new chapter with a different kind of royalty.

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Alicia's taking over all the podcasts this week, with the stories and spiderwebs of screen goddess Elizabeth Taylor. In this week's musically-themed episode, Alicia breaks down some of the lyrics in Taylor Swift's new track, Elizabeth Taylor, from her album The Life of a Showgirl. From Portofino to the very best table at Musso & Frank's, certain themes resonate across these two titanic figures in American pop culture - and leave our podcasts absolutely covered in spiderwebs.

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In an exciting crossover episode today, Alicia was delighted to speak with author and biographer Andrew Morton about his new release Winston and the Windsors: How Churchill Shaped a Royal Dynasty. Our conversation explores the influence of Winston’s mother Jennie Jerome on his early days, as well as Winston’s relationship with each of the Windsor monarchs including Edward VII, George V, Edward VIII, George VI and Elizabeth II. Our discussion does not stop there – Andrew shares many stories about the royal family and his own adventures in reporting.

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As word spreads of Queen Jane and the English people turn to Princess Mary instead, Dudley's coup plot rapidly unravels. The English Navy, forced ashore by storms, learns the situation and the sailors side with Mary, taking personnel and materiel to join her cause against Dudley. In London, efforts to secure the city from invasion collapse as the population rejects the new regime. Things are bleak for the nobles who orchestrated the new queen, and most rush to Mary to make whatever amends they can.

As Mary takes her rightful place on the English throne, the Tower of London gets a passel of new residents. Most, including Jane herself, will eventually be executed, particularly after Wyatt's Rebellion sharpens the sense of danger to the Queen and her counselors. It's a bleak story for fans of Jane Grey, whose personal ambitions do not appear to have included becoming Queen of England, and who was poorly used by powerful men pursuing their own agendas.

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Once on the throne, Queen Jane Grey begins to surprise her would-be handlers, making clear that there would be no crown for her ne'er-do-well husband, and that John Dudley was her subject, not her master. As Dudley rallies the troops for what he thinks will be an easy capture of Princess Mary, the people of England take the news of their new, unknown queen poorly - and rally to Mary's banner.

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Game of Thrones may have wrapped up on that streaming site, but for the Tudor-obsessed, it really never ends. Which brings Alicia to the run-up to the year 1553. King Henry VIII has been succeeded by his son with Jane Seymour, King Edward VI. Having taken the throne at the tender age of nine, the battle among the court's more ruthless players for a regent-like role is intense; the Seymour brothers, Edward and Thomas, and John Dudley, Duke of Northumberland, are constantly scheming against each other to advance their ambitions, which is all well and good until it becomes clear that the young King is not long for the world.

This presents a world of trouble for the now-Protestant English court, because the next logical successor is Henry VIII's first daughter, Mary, an avowed and unrepentant Catholic like her mother, Catherine of Aragon. Desperate to head off her ascension, the Privy Counsel and King Edward (probably) revise the 15-year-old's last will and testament to put the throne in the hands of a Protestant cousin, Lady Jane Grey - by then the daughter-in-law of John Dudley.

But England's Catholic population, sensing an opportunity to regain the status they lost when Henry VIII broke with The Vatican, isn't going to take the snub gracefully. But that's a story for Part Two.

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It was a dark and stormy night in The Bahamas back on July 8, 1943, when a Canadian gold magnate who'd relocated years before for tax reasons was brutally murdered in his home. But don't worry, friends: this was during the period when David, Duke of Windsor, and the former King Edward VIII, was governor of the territory, and he made it his mission to personally handle the investigation of the murder of his rich, white friend. It went.... well, have you met David?

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In the 18th century, modern Germany continued to be a patchwork of various duchies, which kept German nobles in the marriage rotation throughout Europe. So it was that two brothers - Ernst and Leopold - came into the world in the Duchy of Saxe-Coburg-Saalfeld in 1784 and 1790. One would become the King of Belgium, and one would be the legal father of Prince Albert, later the husband of Queen Victoria.

We say "legal father" because apparently it's not 100% clear that Ernst's estranged wife, the long suffering Princess Louise, wasn't comforting her brother-in-law after the death of his wife, England's Princess Charlotte, whose death in childbirth prompted the Hanoverian race to reproduce that gave the world Queen Victoria. 

It is, as they say, complicated.

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