In this episode we discuss the three ways couples grow together. This is not a list of activities or skills couples try to achieve with one another, but rather a natural process that exists within all relationships. In this episode listeners will learn the following:

These three processes help couples come along side one another and work together to achieve grow and change within the relationship.

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In this episode we discuss how to cultivate gratitude as a daily exercise. We begin by walking through a gratitude exercise that stimulates the body in its response. Then we proceed to lay the ground work for 10 ways to cultivate gratitude:

Cultivating gratitude is more of a mindset than anything else and takes time to accomplish. The the benefits can outweigh the effort and be a stepping stone on your journey to healing trauma.

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Get our FREE Trauma Couples Workbook at:

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Need more help. Sing up for a coaching session at:

https://www.traumafreerelationship.com/relationship-coaching

In this episode we explore the idea of brokenness. Often through trauma many people will fee a deep sense not being good enough, being defective, or "bad." Shame is often at the root of this problem and so we explore the what shame looks like in the individual as well as the relationship. In addition we trace shame back to its developmental roots in the attachment relationship with the caregiver, we and explore the protections against shame. In this episode you will learn:

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In this episode we discuss how to navigate the holidays, which can be retraumatizing for many, with compassion and self-care. We discuss specific tools and techniques can that be used in the event of being triggered, as well as how to set boundaries. Furthermore, we explore:

In this episode I reveal my own struggle with Thanksgiving in light of my father's death, and the many other types of triggers that may come about during the holiday season.

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www.facebook.com/traumafreerelationship

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You can download our FREE workbook at:

https://www.traumafreerelationship.com/pl/2147999609

If you need further help or resources, make sure you sign up for a coaching session at:

https://www.traumafreerelationship.com/relationship-coaching

In this episode we discuss internal working models. IWMs, are the templates we hold that shape our expectations of ourselves and our partners. The working models are formed in early childhood from our attachment caregivers and then play out unconsciously in our adult relationships. We break down the three different ways IWMs effect our relationships:

In addition we will place IWMs into the secure and insecure attachment styles so we have a closer look at how they play out in our relationships.

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In this episode we discuss the avoidant attachment style. This style is characterized by low anxiety and high avoidance during times of stress or conflict. Avoidant attachment is an adaptation to inconsistent, rejection, or unavailable caretakers during childhood. The avoidant values independence, is able to self-soothe, and be their own best friend. In addition, we discuss the following areas of a relationship and how they are impacted by the avoidant attachment style.

In this episode we discuss the anxious attachment style and what it means for you and your relationship. Anxious attachment is defined by high anxiety and low avoidance. Meaning that a person with anxious attachment tends to ruminate or be preoccupied about the relationship and whether or not the partner can provide the closeness they desire. We also discuss the five areas of a relationship which is impacted by anxious attachment:

•Perception of Closeness and Intimacy

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In this episode I discuss the importance of empathic attunement and how it builds trust and resilience within the relationship and between partners. Empathic attunement is the ability to feel your way into your partners life so that they "feel felt", and to understand things from their perspective. We discuss the elements that make up empathic attunement and why it is so important in the life of the couples.

We also talk about the benefits of empathic attunement for the couples, such as:

1. Enhanced emotional intimacy - the ability the feel safe and open with your partner.

2. Conflict resolution - the ability to problem solve and create solutions together when their is deep empathy on both sides.

3. Enhance resilience - the ability to get through difficulties together with an "us against them," mentality.

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Tom Philp is a licensed professional counselor in Oklahoma who specializes in couples therapy. To hear more from Tom and engage in the next steps towards a trauma-free relationship, visit traumafreerelationship.com.