Description
When we face challenges, grief, frustration, trauma, and sadness, as Christians, we’re often taught to pray, trust God, and move on so quickly that we never actually have space to grieve what we’ve experienced. But the Bible gives us another way: lament. This is especially important for trauma survivors. Scripture shows us that bringing our deepest pain, questions, and even anguish to God is not a failure of faith; it is part of our faith and full experience. In this episode, we’ll explore what lament is, why it is different from complaining or giving up on God, and how it can help us process emotions rather than suppressing or spiritually bypassing them. We’ll also look at how lament can create a pathway from honest grief toward trust, and I’ll share practical ways you can begin writing, praying, and expressing your own lament without staying stuck there. If you’ve ever wondered whether God can handle your anger, grief, questions, or disappointment, this episode is an invitation to stop hiding your pain and discover that you can bring all of it into the presence of a God, who is big enough to handle your emotions.
Breakdown of Episode
1:17 Intro and Update on Channel
6:30 Why Lament Is Not the Same as Complaining
13:51 Why Does Lament Matter for Trauma Healing?
16:24 Examples of Lament in Scripture
22:44 Lament Versus Spiritual Bypassing
25:59 Concrete Practices: How Do We Practice Lament?
31:41 The Psychological and Research Side of Lament
Sources
American Psychological Association. (2022). Publication manual of the American Psychological Association (7th ed.). American Psychological Association.
Gross, J. J. (1998). Antecedent- and response-focused emotion regulation: Divergent consequences for experience, expression, and physiology. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 74(1), 224–237. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.74.1.224
Gross, J. J. (2015). Emotion regulation: Current status and future prospects. Psychological Inquiry, 26(1), 1–26. https://doi.org/10.1080/1047840X.2014.940781
Holy Bible, New International Version. (2011). Zondervan. (Original work published 1978)
(For podcast citations, you may also cite specific passages in-text, such as Psalm 13; Psalm 34:18; Lamentations 3:22–23; Matthew 27:46.)
Lieberman, M. D., Eisenberger, N. I., Crockett, M. J., Tom, S. M., Pfeifer, J. H., & Way, B. M. (2007). Putting feelings into words: Affect labeling disrupts amygdala activity in response to affective stimuli. Psychological Science, 18(5), 421–428. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-9280.2007.01916.x
Linehan, M. M. (1993). Cognitive-behavioral treatment of borderline personality disorder. Guilford Press.
Neimeyer, R. A. (2001). Meaning reconstruction & the experience of loss. American Psychological Association. https://doi.org/10.1037/10397-000
Park, C. L. (2010). Making sense of the meaning literature: An integrative review of meaning-making and its effects on adjustment to stressful life events. Psychological Bulletin, 136(2), 257–301. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0018301
Pennebaker, J. W. (1997). Opening up: The healing power of expressing emotions (Rev. ed.). Guilford Press.
Porges, S. W. (2011). The polyvagal theory: Neurophysiological foundations of emotions, attachment, communication, and self-regulation. W. W. Norton & Company.
Shalev, A. Y., Bonne, O., & Eth, S. (1996). Treatment of posttraumatic stress disorder: A review. Psychosomatic Medicine, 58(2), 165–182. https://doi.org/10.1097/00006842-199603000-00010
Stroebe, M., & Schut, H. (1999). The dual process model of coping with bereavement: Rationale and description. Death Studies, 23(3), 197–224. https://doi.org/10.1080/074811899201046
van der Kolk, B. A. (2014). The body keeps the score: Brain, mind, and body in the healing of trauma. Viking.
Additional Biblical/Theological Sources (Helpful for a Christian Audience)
Brueggemann, W. (1984). The message of the Psalms: A theological commentary. Augsburg Publishing House.
Lamentations. In Holy Bible, New International Version. (2011). Zondervan.
Psalms. In Holy Bible, New International Version. (2011). Zondervan.
Wright, N. T. (2006). Simply Christian: Why Christianity makes sense. HarperOne.
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