Tread Perilously

Tread Perilously settles in to watch one entire season of Doctor Who. Season 23, to be exact, the infamous "Trial of Time Lord." This week: Parts 1-4 of the Trial, Robert Holmes's "The Mysterious Planet."

When the Doctor is pulled out of time to stand trial for interfering in the development of younger races, the Time Lord prosecutor, the Valeyard, enters into evidence the Doctor's involvement in the affairs of a planet called Ravalox. Sometime before the trial, the Doctor and Peri land on the planet, which features certain eerie similarities to Earth despite being a couple of lights years away. The inhabitants include scruffy surface dwellers and anemic humans in the underground ruled by the mysterious "Immortal." But does the situation on Ravalox relate to the Time Lords or the secretive mission of space-faring rogue and smuggler Sabalom Glitz? Is Ravalox really Earth?

Justin sees Gallifreyan headgear for the first time. He also considers the episode to be the platonic ideal of Doctor Who. Erik maintains that Robert Holmes created The Matrix. Justin attempts to recreate Peri's accent; which continues to amuse him. Glitz and his partner Dibber also delight. Justin and Erik call out the episodes tendency to ask why viewers are watching irrelevant scenes. Erik warns against using the nickname "The Prince of Darkness" when writing about bad ass bad guys and Justin offers a lot more sci-fi writing tips.

Tread Perilously concludes Sci-Fi month with the Black Mirror episode "The Waldo Moment."

When a failed comedian makes good as a naughty parody of a children's show character, his producer positions him against a Conservative standing for MP somewhere in England. The comedian's character, Waldo, also ends up standing in the election. The stunt is working and constituents are turning to Waldo's "politics sucks" non-platform. The comedian, however, is becoming more concerned with his producer's real goal. Will technology destroy the comedian in the end? Will the cartoon bear bring about a worldwide fascist society?

Erik and Justin debate the merits of the Living Slot Machine episode of The Twilight Zone. Justin believes British people put brown sauce in their pints of bitter. He also believes the Queen loves Brokeback Mountain and Batman slashfic. Erik praises the work of professional film and television douchebag Tobias Menzies. He also enjoys the shade thrown at the Liberal Democrats throughout the episode. The pair also cannot deny certain parallels between cartoon bears in the episode and in real life. Various wavering British accents are employed while making fun of wavering American accents. Erik makes educated guesses about other Black Mirror episodes and apologizes for bullying Jeb Bush all those years ago.

Tread Perilously continues its latest Sci-Fi Month with its first look at the late 70s camp classic Buck Rogers in the 25th Century with the episode aptly titled "Vegas in Space."

When a crimelord's most valued data analyst is kidnapped, he offers Dr. Huer the secrets to the Draconians' anti-detection systems in exchange for rescuing her. Soon, Buck and Major Marla Landers (guest star Juanin Clay) are dispatched to the space station Sinaloa; a well known den of gambling and, apparently, human trafficking. Will Buck be able to save the analyst before Dr. Morphus the interrogator fries her brain? Will he decide to save sex slave Tangie from Sinaloa? Will he engineer a foursome before the episode is over?

Justin and Erik recast Gil Gerard's Buck Rogers as a pansexual adventurer; a reading the show sort of supports. Justin mistakes Buck Rogers for Ted Cruz during the credit sequence. Erik tries to explain the Gay Computer Council of the 25th Century. The Good Place gets a free plug. Tread Perilously all-star Richard Lynch returns dressed as Dracula in Space. Justin tries to determine if Buck slept with one of Lynch's goons. He also suggests every movie should end with Journey's "Anyway You Want It."

Tread Perilously continues sci-fi month with the first hour-long episode of the original Battlestar Galactica, "The Lost Warrior."

When Apollo leads a Cylon raiding party away from the fleet, he ends up out of fuel and on the western themed planet Equellis, where "ovine" ranchers are held in the grip of local land baron Lacerta and his mysterious enforcer Red Eye. When Apollo befriends a young boy named Puppis and his mother on the outskirts of town, he determines Red Eye is a Cylon, but refuses to use his colonial pistol until he knows whether or not Red Eye is alone. Will he ever take his gun to town and mete out justice? Will Puppis call after him as he leaves the planet? And will Boxey learn to smoke while in Starbuck's care?

Erik and Justin doubt Cylons like Tommy's burgers. They also lament the comic convention status of Herbert Jefferson Jr. Justin outlines the dangers of making sci-fi terms for common words like "minute" and "years." Uncle Booties makes his first appearance. Memories of Kickboxing Academy appear from the ether. Erik confuses how to say "Cassiopeia." The oddly foppish Lacerta becomes a favorite. Erik also outlines why Equellan males are less desirable and defines the meaning of "felgercarb."

Tread Perilously continues Sci-Fi month by breaking the three-year rule again and looking at an episode of the 2017 series The Orville with the episode entitled "Krill."

When the Orville manages to destroy a Krill ship, the gang end up with a pristine Krill shuttle. Sensing the intelligence gathering opportunity, Captain Ed Mercer (Seth MacFarlane) is ordered to infiltrate a Krill warship using the shuttle and holographic projectors. Soon, he and Gordon Malloy (Scott Grimes) learn about Krill religion, customs and their war machine. He also discovers they train children aboard their starships. Will he be able to stop the Krill's extermination plans for a human colony while saving the Krill younglings?

Erik reveals his dislike of MacFarlane and his seemingly contradictory appreciation for Ted. He also admits that MacFarlane is a charming in person. Justin outlines why he believes "Krill" is both the strongest and weakest episode of The Orville to date. Erik is convinced he can see Scott Grimes's soul dying a little more in each scene. The attention to detail in Krill culture and makeup is praised while MacFarlane's brand of comedy continues to be derided. Nuance comes into play as Justin calls out Erik's preference for repetitious comedy and Erik realizes that Law & Order: Special Victims Unit's Michaela McManus should've spent her career playing Narns.

Tread Perilously heads into a month of science fiction television with a look at the worst episode of Star Trek: Discovery thus far, "Si Vis Pacem, Para Bellum."

Confounded by the cloaking technology dispersed to Klingon ships by Kol, Son of Kor, the U.S.S. Discovery is dispatched to the planet Pahvo; where a unique frequency resonance may aid Starfleet in detecting cloaked ships. The Away Team comprised of Saru, Michael Burnham and Lt. Tyler make contact with an energy lifeform Saru dubs "The Pahvans" despite the fact the planet is causing havoc on his highly evolved danger senses. Meanwhile, disgraced Klingon L'Rell offers to interrogate Admiral Cornwell, but she may be interested in defecting to the Federation. Can she and Cornwell escape the Klingon Ship of the Dead?

Erik and Justin make a deep dive into Star Trek: Discovery's first season, the changes to Klingons and the show's structure with stops at Avatar, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and the forests of Canada. Erik supports the notion that the Pahvans are related to DS9's profits and pah-wraiths. Justin doubts it entirely. Erik sympathizes with Saru's mad anxiety. Justin imagines Klingon IKEA and recalls that all spacefaring races have a version of Swedish Meatballs. The Federation's First Contact protocols get criticized and the pair judge Discovery overall.

Tread Perilously concludes a month of Treading Safely with an emergency appearance by Manimal thanks to the episode "Night of the Scorpion."

When a man arriving in New York by boat is found dead in his cabin, Manimal is called to the ship and discovers he died not from a spider found on his arm, but from a very potent truth serum. He soon meets the man's daughter who was left with instructions to retrieve a letter should her father be found dead. The letter sends her, Manimal and Black Partner to Nassau. The trio soon meets her father's business partner (Doug McClure), who may or may not be involved with Soviet operatives attempting to retrieve a list of deep-cover agents in high places of the American government. Will Manimal use his animal husbandry powers to save the day and democracy?

Hulu becomes a frenemy of the show. Erik and Justin immediately get derailed by the Apu Situation and Allison Mack's NXIVM ties. Erik is tickled by the presence of McClure and his connection to The Simpsons' Troy McClure. The Russians immediately become Latverian thanks to their iffy accents. Justin defines "the knockout spot." Erik denies the existence of the Import/Export industry and Black Partner's superpower is finally identified.

Tread Perilously continues its anniversary month by inducting The Incredible Hulk into the Hall of Fame with an episode called "The Psychic."

While working at a San Francisco bodega, David Bruce Banner bumps into Annie, a psychic who quickly learns he is the Hulk. Strapped for cash, she tips off Jack McGee with the creature's rough whereabouts. But upon getting to know more about Banner, she regrets her decision. Meanwhile, Banner contemplates suicide when he learns a boy he may have struck while Hulking out died of his injuries. Will Annie stop him from making the wrong choice? Will McGee's reporter instincts help him suss out the truth of the Hulk's latest attack? And will David Banner ever find peace?

Erik decides he cannot retire The Incredible Hulk from future Tread Perilously episodes. He and Justin wax nostalgic for the grime of San Fransisco and grouse about the price of slab bacon. Justin argues the show would work in the Berlantiverse. Which, of course, means the pair digress into talk about the CW superhero shows. Chili with beans and the Hulk's 5K run become favorite topics. Star Bill Bixby and guest star Brenda Benet receive praise while Erik has a hard time saying "origins" and "oranges."

Tread Perilously continues its anniversary month by inducting Xena: Warrior Princess into the Hall of Fame with the episode "A Day in the Life."

When Xena and Gabrielle are awakened by a group of ruffians in the forest, they learn Xena's old warlord pal Zagreas intends to raid a nearby village. When the pair cannot find their way to the village, they soon meet Hower, whose village is also under threat from a giant. Once there, Xena and Gabrielle meet Minya; she's strong as an ox and she can read. Can the three defend the village from the giant while also stopping Zagreas from pillaging the other village?

Erik and Justin get lost by talking about the Deathstalker and Ator movies of the 1980s. Justin also mentions a few of his favorite Greek Myths and compares Hower's first meeting with Xena to a cishet young man's first viewing of the John Hughes written Career Opportunities. Minya immediately becomes the Most Valubale Character of the episode. Erik envisions a "Hut Hunters" series to decry the poor housing conditions of the village and praises the varying levels of comedy throughout. A single piece of set decoration takes on a special meaning. Also, Erik falls in love with the episode's incredibly accurate depiction of kite-flying and Justin defends a rebooted version of Xena.

Tread Perilously celebrates its third anniversary with a month of treading safely and inaugurating a Hall of Fame of shows that faced the perilous test. The first inductee: Burn Notice.

In "Bad Breaks," Michael Weston and Jason Bly find themselves held hostage in a private bank at the hands of professional bank thief Prescott (everyone's favorite guest star, Mark A. Sheppard). Forced to fight the bank robbers "like a spy," Michael sets out to make "acts of man look like acts of God." But will Bly make his task harder? Meanwhile, Sam Axe tries to set up a long-term fling with a beer millionaire who owns multiple houses across the Caribbean and who wants nothing more than to relax.

Erik and Justin almost immediately get sidetracked by a discussion of Legends of Tomorrow. Erik discovers the black mold of geopolitics while Justin praises Sharon Gless's role across the whole of Burn Notice. Erik mistakes Antigua for a fictional country and Justin learns about Silicon Valley's hot tub culture. He refuses to believe "Jock Ewing" and "Digger Barnes" are real names from the TV show Dallas. Mark Sheppard's presence in the episode leads to another Battlestar Galactica discussion. Erik learns the real conflict between Michael Weston and Bly and attempts to do a Sheppard impression.