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Hotels. The glamorous perk of flight attendant life… until they’re not. This week, we’re pulling back the curtain on what crew hotel life is really like — the good, the weird, and the absolutely unhinged. From “food beds” vs. “sleeping beds” to conference tables with no actual beds in sight, we’ve seen it all.

We’re also venting (just a little) about holiday passengers, airplane bathroom etiquette, and those deplaning sprinters who think row 37 is somehow first off the aircraft. Plus, in Galley Gossip, a mid-flight wardrobe change turns the aisle into a full-blown fashion runway somewhere over Kentucky. Buckle up. This one’s chaotic in the best way.

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Episode Highlights

[1:03] We talk holiday travel madness — once-a-year flyers, seat confusion, and why row numbers suddenly stop making sense.
[2:42] Drew goes full lecture mode on airplane bathroom etiquette. Tissues. Courtesy. Please.
[5:24] My rant: the deplaning sprinters who think common courtesy no longer exists.
[7:28] The glamour of hotel life — from rundown apartments to La Quinta feeling like luxury.
[9:31] Food bed vs. non-food bed. Office beds. Furniture that makes zero sense.
[11:38] The mysterious conference room hotel suite situation (yes, it happened).
[14:50] Accessible room surprises and asking the front desk for a “bathtub and shower curtain.”
[16:35] Naked hallway stories and why we need data on this immediately.
[17:22] Worst hotel offenses: bad beds, bad pillows, and impossible-to-find outlets.
[19:22] Connecting room paranoia… and Drew apparently opening the door on purpose.
[20:09] When your coworkers fight next door and security gets involved. Hotels: sometimes Jerry Springer, sometimes Marriott.
[23:25] To inspect for bed bugs or live blissfully unaware? We choose peace.
[25:39] Bathtubs vs. showers — and why soaking your feet in a sink may or may not be acceptable.
[28:11] Regional flying throwback: ordering pizza to the hotel before we even land.
[31:00] Galley Gossip: A passenger changes into a floral sundress mid-aisle and asks us if it’s giving Magic Kingdom or Epcot.
[34:32] We wrap it up and invite you to send us your wildest hotel stories.

Thanks for flying with us! If you laughed, cringed, or felt personally attacked by our hotel pet peeves, do us a favor: rate, follow, share, and leave a review. It helps more than you know. See you next time at 35,000

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This episode was brought to you by StaffTraveler, the #1 non-rev app! If you travel on standby and are looking to make your journey easy and stress-free, check out StaffTraveler for free in the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.

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February has us feeling reflective… and real. With Valentine’s Day just behind us, we’re discussing what it actually looks like to be married, both work as flight attendants, and somehow still like each other. People always ask us, “Do you ever even see each other?” And honestly? Sometimes… no! But we’ve learned how to turn that into our superpower.

In this episode, we talk about intentional time, opposite schedules, missed trains at the airport, and the tiny rituals that keep us grounded when life is anything but. From “just landed” texts to Etch-A-Sketch love notes, we’re sharing how we make it work—without pretending it’s always easy. If you’re navigating challenging travel schedules, long distance dating, or just trying not to let routine take over your seasoned relationship, this one’s for you.

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Episode Highlights:

[1:07] Why February has us talking love—and what it’s really like being married flight attendants.

[3:04] Winter flying struggles and the toddler who ran the cabin.

[6:20] The big question: how do we make this schedule actually work?

[8:25] Why absence keeps things intentional (and interesting).

[11:07] Months apart vs. six weeks together—finding the balance.

[16:38] Airport crossovers and five-minute coffee dates that save the day.

[17:24] Our purple door, Etch A Sketch notes, and Trader Joe’s love language.

[19:49] Mandatory texts: good morning, good night, wheels up, wheels down.

[22:06] Turning work trips into adventure (Lisbon chaos included).

[23:42] Galley Gossip: secret Tito’s, law enforcement, and a very messy landing.

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This episode was brought to you by StaffTraveler, the #1 non-rev app! If you travel on standby and are looking to make your journey easy and stress-free, check out StaffTraveler for free in the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.

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So many people ask us, “How do I become a flight attendant?” and while the technical answer is simple—go to the airline’s website and apply—the real question is *what airline should you be applying to in the first place? In this episode, we take a step back and talk through everything you should seriously think about before you ever hit that apply button.

From airline personality and uniforms to bases, commuting, aircraft types, pay structures, and company culture, we’re breaking down the stuff no one tells you when you’re dreaming about this job. We also share a little winter flying chaos, questionable passenger behavior, and one galley gossip story that truly belongs on the no-fly list. If you’re thinking about becoming a flight attendant—or just love an unfiltered look behind the galley curtain—this one’s for you.

Watch this episode on YouTube!

Episode Highlights:

[0:00] Kicking things off with the big question: which airline actually fits you
[1:05] Welcome to Two Guys on a Plane and what really goes on behind the galley curtain
[2:00] Winter flying struggles, crew camaraderie, and why pilots should always offer coffee
[3:10] Banana hammocks, HR violations, and finding humor on bad flying days
[5:53] Why choosing the right airline before applying can save your sanity and seniority
[8:00] Legacy vs low-cost vs regional airlines—and what that really means for your life
[10:14] Bases, commuting, and realizing you don’t actually have to live where you’re based
[11:18] Uniforms, tattoos, sneakers, and how much personality you’re allowed to show at work
[14:03] Company culture, union vs non-union airlines, and why contracts matter
[16:37] Pay beyond the hourly rate: cancellations, training pay, and extra duty money
[17:00] Aircraft types, training intensity, and our favorite planes to actually work
[19:45] Trip length, layovers, route networks, and where you’ll really be flying
[21:00] How the application process works and what you need ready before applying
[23:14] Galley Gossip: a probation-era passenger encounter gone wildly off-script
[26:21] How to submit your own galley gossip and join our Patreon community

Support the show

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This episode was brought to you by StaffTraveler, the #1 non-rev app! If you travel on standby and are looking to make your journey easy and stress-free, check out StaffTraveler for free in the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.

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We love people and we love to travel... no, seriously! Want to join us on one of our upcoming group trips? Check out the link below for current trips!

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Ever wonder how those wild aviation headlines actually come together, and what’s really going on behind the scenes when travel chaos hits the news? This week, we’re recording *on location* in New York City and flipping the script with someone who usually asks us the questions. We’re joined by consumer travel reporter Zach Wichter, and trust us, this one is packed with insight, laughs, and plenty of “oh wow, that tracks” moments.

We dig into passenger behavior, TikTok “travel hacks,” accessibility issues, and why everything in aviation always comes back to safety. From crazy inflight stories to how travel journalism actually works at USA Today, this conversation hits that sweet spot between informative and wildly relatable. If you’ve ever rolled your eyes at the seatbelt sign being ignored—or wondered why you can’t just move to an empty seat—this episode is for you. 

This episode of the Two Guys on a Plane Podcast was recorded on site at the USA Today Bureau in New York City, NY.

Watch this episode on YouTube!

Episode Highlights:

[0:00] We kick things off with real (and unhinged) aviation headlines that prove we can’t make this stuff up.
 [2:18] Zach shares a truly horrifying passenger story involving bare feet, armrests, and lifelong trauma.
 [4:00] We dig into how Zach accidentally found his way into aviation and travel journalism.
 [6:00] Talking flight anxiety, routines, and why knowing too much can make you a worse passenger.
[8:14] How aviation stories get written—breaking news vs. consumer travel advice.
[10:31] Balancing passenger outrage with airline reality (and why safety is always the subtext).
[16:55] TikTok travel hacks: why we’re not buying them and how they create more chaos than comfort.
[19:15] Hate mail, frequent flyer bragging, and what reader feedback really looks like.
[22:52] A deep dive into flight attendant history and why the role has always been about safety.
[28:11] Accessibility, damaged wheelchairs, and why airlines still aren’t doing enough.
[33:42] Why you can’t just move to an empty seat—and why this story struck a nerve.
[37:35] Disruptive passengers, post-COVID behavior, and why crews act fast now.
[43:36] Zach’s biggest passenger pet peeves (spoiler: seatbelts and headphones).
[45:43] Travel habits that actually make flying easier—no “hacks” required.
[52:05] Flight atte

Support the show

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This episode was brought to you by StaffTraveler, the #1 non-rev app! If you travel on standby and are looking to make your journey easy and stress-free, check out StaffTraveler for free in the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.

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Have a funny, wild, or heartwarming travel story from a flight that you’re dying to share with us? Submit your story at the link below and we could feature your story on an upcoming episode of the show!

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Ever think about the firsts that shape a career? In this episode, we’re taking a nostalgic stroll down memory lane and talking about the moments that made us who we are as flight attendants. From first trips and first layovers to the early chaos, nerves, and excitement that come with being brand new, we’re reflecting on why—despite the complaining—we really do love this job.

Along the way, we get real about turbulence, crew bonding, passenger moments that stick with you forever, and those times when flying reminds you just how lucky we are to do what we do. If you’ve ever wondered what flight attendants actually think about their jobs—or you just want a heartfelt, funny look behind the galley curtain—this one’s for you. 

Watch this episode on YouTube!

Episode Highlights:

[0:21] Taking a stroll down memory lane and why we’re talking about flight attendant “firsts”
 [1:00] Catching up on recent flying, vacations, and the irony of jet lag
 [3:24] Drew’s very first flight as a flight attendant—and being thrown into the deep end
 [5:53] Rich’s IOE chaos and realizing this career might always be a little unhinged
 [7:44] First real working trips, baby buses, and why some airplanes feel like home
 [10:23] Our first truly scary turbulence stories and why we nag about seatbelts
 [15:58] Passenger interactions that remind us we’re part of something bigger
 [20:33] First “wow” hotel rooms…and the ones with way too many bunk beds
 [22:51] Crew scheduling disasters and saying “no thank you” to a 4 a.m. phone call
 [25:57] Using flight benefits to do the impossible—like flying to Japan for lunch
 [31:23] The first time we really had to rely on our training
 [37:19] The moments that make us think, “God, I love this job”
 [39:01] Advice we’d give our first-day flight attendant selves

Support the show

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This episode was brought to you by StaffTraveler, the #1 non-rev app! If you travel on standby and are looking to make your journey easy and stress-free, check out StaffTraveler for free in the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.

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Have a funny, wild, or heartwarming travel story from a flight that you’re dying to share with us? Submit your story at the link below and we could feature your story on an upcoming episode of the show!

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In this episode, we decided to flip the script a bit. You hear us complain about passengers all the time—on the podcast, on the jumpseat, in the galley, everywhere. So today, we handed the mic to you: the passengers. We asked what flight attendants do that drives you nuts, and wow… you did not hold back. From safety announcements you swear are unintelligible, to overhead bin drama, to call bells, credit card pitches, bad perfume, and everything in between—you told us exactly how you feel, and we’re diving right into it.

Of course, it wouldn’t be a Two Guys episode if we didn’t get sidetracked ranting about our own recent flights, telling wild stories from the aisle, and laughing at the absolutely unbelievable stuff people do at 35,000 feet. And yes—we even squeeze in a round of galley gossip that may or may not involve a cowboy hat, Stampede Week, and a full-on swan dive in an airport arrivals hall. Buckle up… this one gets chaotic.

Join the conversation over on Threads!

Watch this episode on YouTube!

Episode Highlights:

[0:02] Opening the conversation: what you hate about flight attendants
[1:22] Drew’s chaotic week: strollers, messes, and aisle-walking mayhem
[4:37] Rich’s “is that the last bag of chips?” galley encounter
[6:00] The guy who straight-up ate Drew’s salad
[7:10] Your complaints begin: announcements no one can understand
[8:54] Half cups of water and why it might be your doing
[10:39] Credit card pitches—love them or hate them
[12:14] Babies in the aisle and why bumps happen
[13:43] Overhead bin accusations: are we lying?
[15:44] Call bells: why we don’t always see them right away
[18:30] Trash collection etiquette and “you missed me!”
[20:03] Peanut allergies and misunderstood “lectures”
[22:01] Handling rude passengers when airlines won’t back us
[23:44] Bag lifting: what we legally can’t do for you
[25:17] Yes, you are interrupting our break in the galley
[27:02] Sweat, perfume, and the reality of polyester at 35,000 feet
[29:41] The gin-and-tonic eyebrow raise—when alcohol becomes a concern
[31:21] Bulkhead bins and why crew bags sometimes go there
[33:27] No photos of the crew—please stop doing that
[34:27

Support the show

✈

This episode was brought to you by StaffTraveler, the #1 non-rev app! If you travel on standby and are looking to make your journey easy and stress-free, check out StaffTraveler for free in the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.

Download StaffTraveler

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Have a funny, wild, or heartwarming travel story from a flight that you’re dying to share with us? Submit your story at the link below and we could feature your story on an upcoming episode of the show!

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We love people and we love to travel... no, seriously! Want to join us on one of our upcoming group trips? Check out the link below for current trips!

Travel With Us

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In this episode, we’re diving headfirst into the chaos, comfort, and absolute craziness of spending the holidays as flight attendants—and we brought two of our favorite people along for the ride. We’re joined by our friends and fellow crew members, Bre ane Caleb, who have somehow managed to turn missed holidays, graveyard-view hotel rooms, and granola-bar “Christmas dinners” into some of the most magical traditions we’ve ever experienced.

Together, we talk about the wild layovers that shaped us, the unexpected friendships that kept us sane, and how creating our own traditions—like our now-annual Christmas market trips—has turned some of the hardest moments of the job into the ones we cherish most. Grab your glühwein, buckle in, and get in the holiday spirit with us.

Want to join us on our next Christmas Market trip!? We’re going to Latvia, Estonia, and Lithuania in 2026! Tap here to learn more!

Watch this episode on YouTube!

Episode Highlights: 

[2:01] Caleb’s legendary “baby gun” passenger story
 [4:22] Bri’s unforgettable mid-flight wetsuit moment
 [7:54] How we all randomly met (and re-met) in Budapest
 [9:42] Champagne in coach & the accidental birth of a friendship
 [12:18] Caleb & Rich trauma-bond on a truly awful layover
 [13:44] Holiday layovers from graveyards to granola-bar “dinners”
 [15:21] A senior mama turns Fourth of July into pure magic
 [17:12] The Christmas dinner that wasn’t free… until it wasn’t
 [19:16] How Caleb & Bri started their Christmas market tradition
 [20:55] Why slowing down at holiday markets keeps us coming back
 [23:04] The first market trip we crashed—Drew becomes obsessed
 [25:21] Caleb’s bar-fight scar (and why he earned it)
 [26:55] Keeping traditions alive even as seniority shifts
 [28:29] This year’s destination reveal: Innsbruck, Austria
 [29:58] Why small-town Christmas markets feel like instant community
 [31:31] Tips for junior crew spending holidays away from home
 [33:22] Drew’s go-to holiday hack: pack your favorite dish for a galley feast
 [35:40] BIG announcement: Our 2026 group Christmas market trip
 [37:15] Lightning-round cross-check with Caleb & Bri
 [41:05] Final thoughts & where to find more behind-the-scenes chaos

Support the show

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This episode was brought to you by StaffTraveler, the #1 non-rev app! If you travel on standby and are looking to make your journey easy and stress-free, check out StaffTraveler for free in the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.

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✈

Have a funny, wild, or heartwarming travel story from a flight that you’re dying to share with us? Submit your story at the link below and we could feature your story on an upcoming episode of the show!

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We love people and we love to travel... no, seriously! Want to join us on one of our upcoming group trips? Check out the link below for current trips!

Travel With Us

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Ever wonder what it’s like to fly the skies on a whim, hopscotching from one city (or country!) to another without a confirmed seat in sight? In this episode, we’re diving deep into the wild, wonderful world of non-rev adventures — the ultimate flight attendant perk. From unexpected detours to last-minute jaunts across the globe, we’re sharing our favorite standby travel stories and tips for how to navigate the chaos with humor and heart.

We’re spilling all the tea on the perks (and perils) of standby flying, including how we once jet-set to Paris for a croissant and how an Uber across state lines helped Rich hit his 50th state just in time. Whether you're a seasoned staff traveler or just curious about how flight crews make the most of their benefits, this episode is packed with laughs, travel inspo, and a healthy dose of galley gossip.

Watch this episode on YouTube!

Episode Highlights:

[0:21] Why we became flight attendants (hint: free flights)
 [1:09] The chaos of holiday travel and how to survive it
 [2:15] Drew’s uncle gets a rude awakening about buying standby tickets
 [4:48] Rich’s unforgettable birthday flight to San Juan and why crew love crew
 [7:45] The beauty of reciprocal travel agreements among airlines
 [8:39] Drew’s Boston-to-Vegas pivot: why winter weather can't stop a standby trip
 [13:01] Winning the non-rev game: rerouting through Vegas to beat the crowd home
 [14:50] How StaffTraveler saved our Minneapolis concert plans
 [16:21] The breakfast-in-Paris trip that almost derailed our wedding planning
 [18:50] Rich’s epic quest to hit all 50 states — including an Uber across the Dakotas
 [22:46] Our whirlwind 7-country vacation and why Egypt blew us away
 [24:03] Pro tips for newbie non-revs: buffer days, backup plans, and bathroom couches
 [25:00] Galley Gossip: The “cloud” coming from the engine that wasn’t

Support the show

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This episode was brought to you by StaffTraveler, the #1 non-rev app! If you travel on standby and are looking to make your journey easy and stress-free, check out StaffTraveler for free in the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.

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Have a funny, wild, or heartwarming travel story from a flight that you’re dying to share with us? Submit your story at the link below and we could feature your story on an upcoming episode of the show!

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We love people and we love to travel... no, seriously! Want to join us on one of our upcoming group trips? Check out the link below for current trips!

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In this special Veterans Day episode, we sit down with the incomparable Keturah Johnson—combat veteran, flight attendant, and International Vice President of AFA-CWA. As the first queer woman of color and veteran elected to serve in this powerful union role, Keturah shares her extraordinary journey from the tarmac to the battlefield to the picket lines. She opens up about her military service during “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” her fierce advocacy for trans rights, and the fight for visibility and equity in aviation.

This conversation is full of heart, truth, and power. We dive into what it means to wear the uniform—both in the military and in the skies—as a queer person of color, and how union activism is helping change the future of the flight attendant profession. Keturah brings receipts, realness, and the kind of candid insight that will leave you inspired (and maybe a little fired up). You don't want to miss this one.

Watch this episode on YouTube!

Episode Highlights:

[0:21] Introducing Keturah Johnson and why she’s the perfect Veterans Day guest
 [1:20] That time Keturah met Joe Biden at the airport—aviators and all
 [2:42] From catering planes to the National Guard—Keturah’s journey into the military
 [5:00] Deployed to Afghanistan: surviving combat under “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”
 [7:04] “Don’t clap for veterans—vote for them.” Keturah gets real about systemic neglect
 [10:57] Growing up in Kenya and how that shaped her global worldview
 [13:20] Losing her locks in the military and reclaiming identity through union activism
 [21:57] Fighting for uniform choice and pushing back from day one
 [24:22] Union leadership 101—stepping into power and demanding representation
 [27:44] Why diverse leadership matters and the power of being unapologetically visible
 [30:50] The importance of visibility through pins, pronouns, and showing up
 [32:47] Becoming the first queer woman of color elected to high AFA office
 [35:06] Dealing with respect and disrespect—how Keturah keeps going
 [38:24] Speaking up at work: real advice for taking action and using your voice
 [41:07] Building union power and the HRE committee’s biggest wins
 [44:43] Advice to new flight attendants: wear your pin and speak up
 [45:15] Keturah’s go-off moment—protect trans folks, respect veterans, and support women’s sports
 [46:29] Cross-Checked lightning round—window or aisle, Philly pride, and G F

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This episode was brought to you by StaffTraveler, the #1 non-rev app! If you travel on standby and are looking to make your journey easy and stress-free, check out StaffTraveler for free in the Apple App Store or Google Play Store.

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✈

Have a funny, wild, or heartwarming travel story from a flight that you’re dying to share with us? Submit your story at the link below and we could feature your story on an upcoming episode of the show!

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Have you ever wished there was a school for airplane passengers? Well, class is in session! In this episode, we're diving headfirst into the do’s and don’ts of airplane etiquette, straight from the galley to your ears. From overhead bin blunders to bare feet horror stories, we’re breaking down everything that makes us cringe—and laugh—when flying the friendly skies. And yes, we’ve got thoughts on your speakerphone convos and tuna sandwiches too.

We’re sharing real listener stories, our own in-flight drama, and hilarious personal experiences that highlight the bizarre (and sometimes brilliant) behavior we see onboard. If you’ve ever flown—or plan to—you won’t want to miss this crash course in sky manners. Bonus: You might just walk away knowing the true rules of the armrest game.

Watch this episode on YouTube!

Episode Highlights:

[0:39] We kick off class—welcome to the school of airplane etiquette.
 [1:26] Rich shares a passenger meltdown over a tight connection... and poor decision-making.
 [4:58] Andrew's “everything went wrong” trip, complete with delays, storms, and missed trains.
 [9:04] We react to your listener-submitted etiquette gripes—starting with bare feet on bulkheads.
[10:50] Armrest rules, manspreading, and who controls the window shade—welcome to Sky Law.
[14:44] Speakerphone sagas, juicy convos, and when it's okay (maybe) to listen in.
[17:01] PSA: Stop yanking seatbacks to stand up—your seatmate’s neck will thank you.
[18:04] The overhead bin shuffle—get what you need before sitting down!
[19:25] Safety demo respect, headphone etiquette, and who deserves your “thank you.”
[22:02] Don’t poke the flight attendant... or touch us anywhere else either.
[23:06] The great overhead bin debate—move my bag? Drew says yes. Rich says... ask first.
[26:24] The etiquette of bathroom use—just don’t. Unless you must. Then spritz, please.
[28:01] Whispered convos, stinky food, and should you snore?
[29:26] Lavatory habits and tray table horror stories—we see (and smell) it all.
[33:29] The myth of “your” overhead bin and how to stop the tantrums.
[34:39] Don’t run to the front. Stay seated. The airplane is not a race track.
[36:30] Diaper duty belongs in the lav—not on the tray table.
[37:29] Galley Gossip: Eli’s panicked passenger and the mysterious “engine smoke.”

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