Vulgar Auteurs

Heeeeyyy Macarena! Ah hi!

It's more than just fast, it's Furious!! How does a predominantly horror-based genre director get a shot at directing a Fast and Furious movie, AND make it both the highest grossing and highest rated Fast and Furious movie of all time? Well....okay we only know a little bit about all of that, but damn does Furious 7 slap, and while producer Evan is on vacation, Jason and Paco get to talk shop without some weirdo always interrupting and doing dumb impressions and-....he’s right behind me, isn’t he?......mmmmoving on. Join the fellas as they discuss the merits of pulling off death defying stunts, Race Wars (no, not that kind), how to make a badass introduction for a villain, and saying goodbye to an old friend.

What is...truly...Insidious?? Time travel? Dimensional rifts? Cogent plot developments between sequels?? Now wait just uh darn tootin'...

Join the McCullough and Haskins group as they struggle to diagnose a sickly sequel, one with a penchant for the spooky trills, yet tramps upon its successor's coattails, Insidious: Chapter 2, like a muffin bottom to a muffin top. Sorry muffin bottoms, but the tops have more substance.

The fellas talk James Wan’s successor and inadvertent remake of Insidious, The Conjuring. What does this movie have that Insidious doesn’t? *Deep Breath*...religion!! Yaaaayy. Join Jason, Paco and Evan as they discuss Wan’s descent into Hollywood formulas, and how original material often gets poorer ratings than rehashed gobbledygook. As well as drunk Patrick Stewart being Ubered about, and the importance of family and how having approximately 116 children makes for a literally white washed film. Who is McKenzie Foy? A great actor. Which one is she? Who the hell knows? They all look the same.

Weeee're back! And so is James Wan to the horror genre, this time in stricter force with his 2010 spooktacular-spooky-woooo-who's there? film, Insidious. The fellas talk about how a low budget film like Insidious can be as visually stunning as any Hollywood blockbuster if put in the hands of a capable design team, as well as spookiness, and the spooktactular spooks that befall a spooky experience. Astral projecting is brought up, but not long before one of us has to leave the room to do some asstral projecting of our own...Sorry. Had to slip that one in there.

We also want to mention that we thank all of you who have stuck with us during our extended break, and even gone through our back catalogue of episodes. We can't do any of this without your support, and we feel it every week. Thank you!

In our longest episode to date, the boys talk about the semi-official sequel to Death Wish, aptly named Death Sentence. They dish hot Hollywood goss, talk shy dying, and Roseanne Barr. Don't worry. Death Sentence is also mentioned...80% of the time, and for good reason. One of those good reasons: national treasure, Kevin Bacon, who seriously makes this movie. We love you, Mr. Bacon. You can make a lack-luster script come alive. Anyway, listen to Jason, Paco and Evan ramble on about the old-school ideologies of revenge flicks being brought to the 21st century, and how James Wan actually makes this genre of film tolerable even to the most sensitive of viewers, and engaging to boot.

Disclaimer: This episode was recorded in two sessions due to technical difficulties, and producer/engineer Evan did his best to work around these issues...he could have done better, but...don't tell him we said that. Anyway, there may be some continuity issues regarding the content that the fellas refer to, and there are a few moments where the audio quality is not at its finest....it never is. What? I didn't say anything. *Side-eye*

The fellas talk James Wan's second Hollywood flick, Dead Silence..........

.....okay that was it. Did you enjoy it? We certainly had a time. Are they puppets or dummies? Are those two the same? Marionette? What's the deal with these dolls? All we know is that we're the dummies. No, you're the dummy. What is this 1936? We're entertained by some old lady throwing her voice about? Oh, shoot. Now we're marked for Mary Shaw's curse. Oh, well. Better than being cursed to sit through 34 hours of Michael Bay movies....wait....we really are the dummies.

Anyway, Paco and Jason somehow convince Evan that Dead Silence is fun to watch, and, ultimately, establish that James Wan and Leigh Whannell are talented filmmakers, but are set back by the dealings of the Hollywood scene. We believe in you Wan and Whannell!

We branch, now, into the genre of horror and a couple of other films that will eventually give us the necessary respite that Michael Bay could only provide once in a great while. The boy's talk Saw. And as we all know, the sequel should have been titled, Saw(s)...but...whatever. We'll live. Particularly knowing that Saw is only one of the myriad of great horror works that came afterward. James Wan, your work will definitely not go...unjudged...in the best way possible. We swear...seriously.

Just waiting to talk about Aquaman. My man! (That line is never said in the movie...unfortunately...just saying)

This episode is also brought to you by Evan's new favorite TV show, Hannibal. We're Mad about Mads and feel like Dancing over Hugh. We've been Fishing for adequate acting skills and Lawrence delivers, never Burns. Park yourself in Hettienne's excellence, and Rohl over, Beethoven, because Kacey kills it. Do you Care to oLINE yourself with great writing? Look no further. Also Scott Thompson. *Swoon*

At the top: Thank you all for your support and appreciation as we tackled this sojourn through Bayhem. The boys talk in length (and we mean, IN LENGTH) about where this journey has taken us, and how Michael Bay should be highly recognized as a director...and why that's both good and bad. We love you Michael Bay, and at the same time...mmmm...no comment.

Again, none of this would have been possible without a solid platform like Anchor.fm, and one of the most effective remote-recording programs: Zencastr.

Our Sisyphean journey is at an end. The fellas discuss....action...that's about it. Oh! That and the importance of character development and how Michael Bay doesn't really care about that. It's an action flick. What more do you want? Stop asking. But seriously, one last hurrah to set our minds at ease, even if this movie does not. We love you Michael Bay. Just not the way you were probably hoping we would.