VulvaVaginaCervix

Today we're chatting about Seasonal Affective Disorder — Seasonal Depression. Gabrielle Coffey on TikTok mapped out our days and told us we need a plan. 5hahem on Instagram cleared it up,  SAD is seasonal depression. 

Some Symptoms — Persistent low mood, lacking energy, harder to get up in the morning, difficulty concentrating, change in appetite and more.

How are we handling it?

Routines, Supplements - Vitamin D, Movement, Exercise, get as much Sunlight as possible, Music — Dance, Journaling, Therapy, Stay Hydrated, Avoid too much takeout, Got to Sleep — not too much though, Hot showers, baths and saunas, Be Comfortable and Cozy — Hot and spicy foods and beverages, Hobbies, Remember your Friends, ENJOY THE HOLIDAYS — lean into the celebration... make the most of the celebration season, Do some of those winter checklists on Pinterest and Create and Incredible Home you love... make it your favorite place to be!!

xoxoxoxoxo,

Ashlee'

Remembering who TF you are… 

Baby, we been through some things and we have forgotten our joy. We are forgotten how important it is to take up some space!! In this episode we discuss some areas of importance to getting yourself back. We talk about people, our appearance and environment; we discuss getting up and getting out, as well as enjoying time with yourself. And then there are a few things that may me feel great and you can incorporate them too. 

The grief, the move, the breakup happened... we're on the other side of it and we've got to stop looking and feeling like what we been through. Cheers to a fresh start and remembering yourself!

Ashlee'

Hey y'all!! Quick disclaimer: this is not medical advice. You can find all of this information yourself in a textbook, from your care practitioner and on the internet. Here, we're talking about it though.

What is Gestational Diabetes?

When — different question — do you want to screen? (Accepting the risks of undiagnosed gestational diabetes.) If you screen positive, will you do the diagnostic test?

How — using a 50 gram glucose load (Fresh Test, jelly beans, meal, glucola), continuous glucose monitor, or finger prick for 2 weeks.

       One hour screening and

       Three hour test - Lab - fasted.... take 100g glucose load... tested every hour for three hours. Must pass two of the tests for the amount of glucose that should have cleared your bloodstream in that one hour.

Foods to help and foods that hurt - not about blame and eating too much sugar… unexpected foods like oats, bread, pasta. Focus on low glycemic index foods.

What does this mean for you and your pregnancy?

Birth Complications: Prolonger labor, Hemorrhage, Birth injury, Shoulder dystocia, 3rd and 4th degree tearing.

Other complications:Stillbirth,Pre-eclampsia,Hypertension,Polyhydramnios, Preterm birth.

— not necessarily a dietary condition though as Lily Nichols wrote in Real Food for Pregnancy, “blood sugar is highly responsive to lifestyle changes.” — “carbohydrate intolerance in pregnancy.”

Management 

      Early nutrition conversation 

      Great focus on fiber first and protein to fill yourself… 

      High protein breakfast and add healthy fat — is going to be your best friend!! — rather than filling on simple carbs like breads and pasta. 

      Eating more than 3 meals a day… some of us wait and will only eat when we’re really hungry and then we binge. I’m encouraging you to eat every two hours… it will also help with your indigestion. 

      Exercise - I love a 30 minute walk after a meal — 15 minutes out and 15 minutes back.

Sleep - hopefully 9 hours each night — naps... whenever you like.

Reducing stress (get help with other children, cooking cleaning, therapy, laughing and fun activities).

Working with a nutritionist. Working with a maternal fetal medicine specialist. 

Vitamin & Nutrient deficiency - Vitamin D, Magnesium 

Daily kick counts in the 3rd trimester.

Thanks for listening! 

xoxoxox, Ashlee'

Random...put it in the air chat:

Breakfast coffee with a friend

Watching Wednesday 

Halle Berry — WE LOVE YOU

Amanda Seales' debate

Child marriage & the Age of consent

I finally saw The Notebook for the first time!!

xoxoxoxox,

Ashlee

Tips for Healthier Menstruation

In American society, we have normalized painful periods. Normalizing discomfort over HEALTHY MENSTRUATION. It's not normal -- it's common. And we're are working to arrive at healthy. In this week's episode, I share a quick Reddit AITA, discuss some of the below discomforts of menstruation, and what can help.

Recommended Read: The Fifth Vital Sign by Lisa Hendrickson-Jack 

Some Red Flags: 

• Longer days of  bleeding
• Sleepiness & fatigue 
• Mood Swings
• Bloating and constipation
•  Headache
• Breast tenderness
• Nausea and vomiting 
• Pain: abdomen, lower back, asshole
• Changes in sleep
• Changes in appetite
• Weight gain 
• Acne
• Irritability and anxiety
• PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder) -- trouble concentrating, feeling overwhelmed, easily irritated, falling into a "just before your period specific" depression - suicidal ideation, reduced interest in interacting with others

Some Kindnesses Just for Us:

• Allow yourself to slow down - GO TO SLEEP
• Warm feet, warm womb
• Give in to your food cravings after you have had a meal 
• Bananas the week before menstruation
• Menstrual discs, underwear, cups, organic sanitary products - avoid toxic tampons and pads
• Sexual intercourse and self pleasure
• Increase oral magnesium - consider magnesium cream and epsom salt baths
• Good to the bathroom… consistently after ovulation - increased fiber, watching water, bananas, liquid fiber, castor oil on the abdomen
• Red raspberry leaf tea
• Elix
• Oil of oregano and Black seed oil
• Wild yam cream
• Movement throughout the month - give yourself grace before menstruation… please take it easy
• Get your *Go into yourself* care basket together… food (real meals), snacks, feel good blanket or stuffy, great show to watch, pet or loved one

We got this boo! 

xoxoxox,

Ashlee'

In today's episode, we discuss the importance of destigmatizing abortion care. There is so much conversation around female reproductive health and the fact that abortion care is health care. Let's understand why abortion care is health care. Let's understand why this is more than a political conversation about a person's right to choose whether or not to continue in their pregnancy. This is about the health of all persons that can potentially become pregnant people. We have got to start thinking critically and respecting each other. Sometimes, that simply means further educating ourselves. Let's do it!

A million things you didn’t learn in school - a few notes from me and the ladies on TikTok.

Low impact exercises plus high fiber plus great protein

REST and Sleep - 9-10 hours necessary, take a nap in needed.

Medical Gaslighting

Listen to your intuition

Stop feeling bad for being a women

Magnesium every night increases sleep quality and reducing bloating around the time of menstruation

Prenatals are the only vitamin combination that are actually made for women… taking them even when you're not pregnant can be great!

The male body and the female body are not the same

Depression… Anxiety… ADHD… PMS… PMDD… they look similar - THEY ARE DIFFERENT AND HAVE DIFFERENT TREATMENTS.

Humming regulates our nervous system 

Chocolate__Yoga says “I learned this a while back but we’re quite literally designed and meant to be pampered and taken care of / catered to, while on our periods. It’s an extremely spiritual and sacred time. We’re meant to relax and unwind completely.” 

“Being celibate. That’s all I’m gonna say” - hahahahaha

Learn to say "NO," and stop apologizing

Sit in the sun right when you wake up. 

Your body will reject a toxic partner before you even realize it consciously. Your nervous system tells you when a person is bad for you.

~ “Postpartum depression is more than feeling sad. It’s paranoia. It’s rage. It’s ’being suicidal.’ It’s uncontrollable weeping. It’s so much more than just “sad.”

Lymphatic drainage — jumping in the morning — 20 jumping jacks or just jumping up and down 100 times

Suppressing your emotions causes issues in your health

Preserving your fertility - The Fifth Vital Sign, Taking Charge of Your Fertility

"I drink a lot less alcohol and I feel a lot better"

"Abortions are safe… no long term physical or mental health issues"

Eating properly - you need more calories to stay in shape… eating less disrupts your hormones… PROGESTERONE

Antibiotics inhibit birth control from working properly… the birth control bleed is not a period - Everything Below the Waist

Stress and strong emotional responses can make you sick

Live according to your menstrual cycle

CRAVINGS ARE OKAY — I do not believe in food rewards… If you want it, eat. 

xoxoxox,

Ash

Today, we're chatting about sexual intercourse education - a communication with yourself, partner, or many partners.

It took me some time to become comfortable with the topic... and then I came to realize - not all babies are made in missionary position! It would be great for more birth workers coming to terms with the fact that our clients are here because they engaged in sexual intercourse. We must educate ourselves in order to educate, encourage and respect our clients.

We chat about the value in having appropriate sexual exploration and sexual intercourse education. One said benefit is that you are BUILDING CONFIDENCE IN YOURSELF and your own body! 

We discuss SEXUAL EXPLORATION - Curiosity (age appropriate), exploring yourself and your own sexual curiosity vs sexual explorations.

Education can remove some of the shame and fear in Christian American society around sexual intercourse. There is a l ack of education around sexuality, sexual intercourse, anatomy, age appropriateness. This lack of education can be dangerous for us.

Religious abstinence only education is always optimal. It steals from SOMEONE — LGBTQIA+ individuals, people who are not pleased with their partner’s performance or views on sexual intercourse, the shame some individuals carry into marriage because of this teaching. It can be steals from a potentially fulfilling intimate life.

We should also teach about relationships. Speak frankly about what marriage looks and can feel like. Let's learn about red flags and understand what we're getting ourselves into when we decide we can to engage in a casual sexual intercourse relationship.

It starts with knowing yourself. Have a look at your own genitals… your breasts… menstruation… changes in puberty… changes in day-to-day life. I feel like we talk about the facts and do not explore the feelings. Some of these physical changes come with feelings. Hormonal changes come with feelings. WHAT DO THESE HORMONE CHANGES FEEL LIKE AND ADDRESS THEM.

Knowing what YOUR healthy is much more important: your scent, color, ridges, vaginal fluid, cleaning yourself, shaving/waxing… different situations and times of the month - during menstruation, arousal, after menstruation, during ovulation. We have got to be familiar with our bodies during these stages apart from and apart of sexual interaction. Many do not know that the labia minora and vagina lubricate, the clitoris swells, the vagina lengthens, and the cervix softens and becomes more sensitive during arousal.

Well... How can we reframe sexual intercourse education? 

Sexual exploration and Sexual intercourse education — a sexual conversation… sometimes you’re communicating with yourself and sometimes the communication is with another person.

There are various stages of sexual intercourse education… kid appropriate education, preteen and newly teen education, heading to college and adult education. Educating of the potential situations Like: who is involved? what happens... potentially? when to have sexual intercourse for the first time... age... person... relationship... and the concept of virginity? for what reason you want to engage in sexual intercourse? Let's talk about contraception, pregnancy, STIs and safty. What about comfort with your partner? And do I have to have an orgasm? You've got to answer that for yourself.

And lastly, we discuss looking for love in sexual intercourse. Agreeing to a non committal interaction and the settling. Let's shape the sexual intercourse conversation into one of communication and relationship. One that can serve you.

Book recommendations

I: The Girl Guide by Marawa Ibrahim

II: PussyPedia by Zoe Mendelson, Maria Conejo and the Founders of PussyPedia.net

III: Sex Plus by Laci Green

Welcome back to VulvaVaginaCervix!!

I've been a doula these past 12 years and I share a story about my sister. (I am so proud of her!) As I listened to her story of medical mistreatment, I felt helpless because I have not completed my CPM (Certified Professional Midwifery) Certification just yet.

Next, I share a bit about the kinds of conversations you will have with your doula and choosing a great care provider. I mention that reading Plus Size Pregnancy is great for helping one feel better about being pregnant in a larger body. Doulas are able to help you choose the best place to birth for you.

The benefits of hiring a doula: physical and emotional support, education and advocacy, brings you and your partner closer. With your doula, you discuss what you really want for your birth. The book, Natural Hospital Birth by Cynthia Gabriel, has some great exercises. I also share some of what I do in my prenatal visits with clients.

Thank you for listening!!! And I'll see you next week.

Today, we're talking about friendship: the benefits to your health, confidence and life. We discuss what a great and bad friendship looks like. 

We begin with some unhinged social media posts: Hey Blacks!!, Ugly By Proxy and AITA.

The point of today's episode: be open to making some new friends and nurturing the old relationships as well. 

GREAT Friendships: Building confidence, add humor, provide empathy, improve your health. Great friends encourage, listen and provide wisdom. Within healthy friendship, you share emotional experiences, have space to be yourself, experience connection. As  a great friend, you bring additional perspectives, call out the bullshit in a shitty situation and provide a sense of belonging and empowerment.

We talk about different pockets of friends: forever friends, going out friends, common world view friends... Friendship is so important because these are the people YOU have CHOSEN to be apart of your life. It’s okay to have one or two friends. It’s okay to have certain friends for specific areas of your life. 

How to show up for your friends and how do they show up for you? You don’t have to talk everyday… I have great friends that we talk here and there…  and show up when it matters for funerals, weddings, when someone had a hard day. You don't have to be there every second. We all have our own separate lives, but we should prioritize showing up and checking in on our friends, as well.

Toxic Friendships - Insult you… weirdly copy what you’re doing… embrace and befriend people that are not your people. People that make themselves the victim… often, doing things you are not comfortable with, disrespect your boundaries... they are not your friends. Individuals that are not happy for you... you feel drained after interacting with them... you have to lie and embarrass yourself to cover up the friend’s mess, you feel obligated to be their friend... they change when others are around... Those are not your friends. See Braving and putting friendships in appropriate boxes in the episode. 

BRAVING - Trust - Brene’ Brown: Boundaries, Reliability, Accountability, Vault, Integrity, Non-judgement, Generosity

How to be present for friends during pregnancy - are we happy for this experience? If not yet, I'll be happy when you're happy.

How to be present for friends during postpartum - make your friends food and literally just show up.

Thank you for listening. Please get out there and make some friends