Waiting 4 Wrath

In This Week’s Show, episode 279, we’ve lost a host - if temporarily - and our joie de vivre for the podcast - if intermittently.

Now, grab a beer and help us test the god hypothesis — because, while iTunes hasn’t struck us down yet, we are trying its patience!

Shea’s Life Lesson

This week I learned that some employers are banning the use of the phrase “Ok Boomer,” so here are some helpful alternatives to sprinkle in your busy work week; Okey dokey about to croaky, 10-4 Dinosaur, Very well sir old as hell, eat my ass mr old as grass.

But before we get to all that, let’s have a beer!

This Week’s Beer

Day Trippin’ Session IPA by Swamp Head Brewery

by Travis

* BA Link: https://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/21154/127950/

* BA Rating: 87 - 3.87

* Style: American IPA

* ABV: 4.5%

* Aaron: 8

* Shea: 7

* Steve: 6

This Week’s Show

Round Table

The round table this week starts with iTunes reviews. One kinda shitty, and two kinda wonderful!

To Sweet Pea Brown, sorry for all the toilet humor a few weeks back. Well, ok not sorry in the contrite sense, more in the Canadian sense. Soory it wasn’t to your liking but to be honest, when has this show ever shied away from messy jokes. For what it’s worth, we’re working on something that will be much less of that.

To Dave and Rebel Ox, thanks for your 5-star reviews! We appreciate you doing your bit to push the 1-star reviews down the list. That really made our day!

And speaking of legendary woes that turned out not to be glow-worms, Jenn is still pretty ill but on an upward trajectory. We’ve been a bit hesitant to dive into it but with Jenn’s permission to sate your curiosity here are some of the blanks filled in. Jenn had a terrible cold, as is her way, but unfortunately, it turned into pneumonia, or as I believe it’s called in medical circles - milk lung. Dealing with that for a few weeks eventually Jenn’s doctor gave up and drunk-texted his retirement to the hospital. Something about “damnit” and being a “Doctor, Jenn” not a miracle worker. Sadly, Jenn’s health did not improve and her new doctor found pleurisy in her left lung. For those unfamiliar, that’s when your milk lung curdles into Alveoli du mont des cats, or yee-horrible kitten-cheese air-tube as it’s known in America. She’s been in quarantine for some time but we did manage to visit last week. Sadly my ramen did not cure her. Luckily for us all the doctors are feeling positive and if all goes well she’ll be released to work and have visitors as this episode is released.

So if you want to help in Jenn’s speedy recovery … hit up the Facebooks or Twitters and send her a message! Ha, you thought I was gonna beg for iTunes reviews didn’t you? Nope, Jenn’s board and there’s only so much Netflix to watch or bad jokes in Slack to read, so your well-wishes, meme’s, and unsolicited dick pics will go a long way toward keeping her in good spirits.

And from there I'll simply say, that for a buck a show you’ll get more show, extra shows, and soon a sneak peek of the new thing we’ll talk about in more detail next week.

Patreon Story

ET Press Start To Continue

* https://www.cnet.com/news/success-atari-e-t-games-found-in-new-mexico-dump/

ET didn’t go home, he fell into a hole in Alamogordo New Mexico.

It turns out that Zek Penn, the director of filmographic vomit like X-2 is making another film, this one, about the world’s worst video game. Upshot - at least this is supposed to be terrible.

ET was a box office smash but more than that, it was anticipated to be a box office smash which meant the pressure was on for toys, memorabilia,

In This Week’s Show, episode 278, we queue the patrons I’s, before FIFO-ing our Coronas, after trimming some wonderful ladies beards.

Now, grab a beer and help us test the god hypothesis — because, while Shea’s beard hasn’t struck us down yet, it might be what ruined Jenn’s lungs!

Shea’s Life Lesson

This week I learned that Ariana Grande is actually not a font or a size at Starbucks.

Jenn’s Actual Lesson

[cough] [weeze] [cough] KHAAAAAAAAAN!

Jenn's condition continues to change. Pneumonia, pleurisy, and weight lifting neck. It's not great but she's got a new doctor and we hope is on the path to feeling better.

We'll talk more about Jenn's situation next week but for now we'll just say that if you want to send well-wishes, I'm positive she'd greatly appreciate the distraction!

~Aaron

But before we get to all that, let’s have a beer!

This Week’s Beer

Happy Friendsgiving - Citybuilt Brewing Company

From Steve E.

* UT Link: https://untappd.com/b/city-built-brewing-company-happyfriendsgiving/2927901

* UT Rating: 3.85

* Style: Sour - Berliner Weisse

* ABV: 3.8%

* Aaron: 7

* Shea: 9

* Steve: 7

This Week’s Show

Round Table

Email from Dustin of Atheist Nomads regarding out talking about closed roads in Wyoming being commonplace.

“I almost dropped out if the SDA seminary after my first semester. However, I would have had to drive across Wyoming in December to get back to Oregon from Michigan. I considered driving down to Texas, across I-10 and then up I-5 but that would have have been a really long trip, so I decided to power through another semester to avoid the Wyoming winter.”

Listener Jon pointed out that we misused poisonous vs venomous… Damnit :(

We know the difference, we promise, but in the heat of the moment you just never know what we’re likely to spout.

If you bite it and die it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die it’s venomous. If you bite it and it likes it, it’s kinky.

Patreon Story

As we continue to fight the plague that has taken over Wrathful studios I’ve again had to dive directly into the development of a dose of QI duplication.

For today’s show, we’ve done the maths and the numbers don’t quite add up,

He’s shown his work but Yeti division is surprisingly short, Shea!

He’s statistically significant even if his “p” value doesn’t rise to the occasion, Steve!

Starting our lengthy list at the least, it’s 0!

Patient 0, that is. And no, I don’t mean Jenn.

Panel, where did the term patient 0 originate?

"Patient 0" actually never was. During the 1980's AIDS epidemic the term patient 0 was commonly understood to mean Gaetan Dugas, a man diagnosed with AIDS early in the epidemic. He would soon thereafter be propagandized by the San Francisco Chronicler as the main vector for the disease and it's rapid spread.

Unfortunately, that was all a typo.

The term "Patient 0" hadn't really been invented yet. Medical forms at the time often added details about patients in shorthand. In Dugas's case, he was marked as "Patient O" or a "patient outside of California." Tragically for him, at some point, the "O" was mistaken for a "0" and the label stuck. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Index_case

Incrementing away from AIDS to something that’s just about as fun, taxes! Panel, what’s a rule of taxation our listeners probably haven’t heard the first thing about?

It turns out that 1's are far more important to your taxes than 0's. While we all might want more 0's involved... depending on the directionality of the cashflow I suppose...

In This Week’s Show, episode 277 I get my soul sucked out through a hole in a Japanese bathroom… by a scary old woman… who made Steve watch…

Now, grab a beer and help us test the god hypothesis — because, while the Yokai haven’t struck us down yet, we are trying their patience!

Shea’s Life Lesson

This week I learned that ancient Greeks did not know what french fries are, which may account for their physical fitness… And my lack of it.

Jenn’s Actual Lesson

Jenn sent us a recipe for her homemade Sizzurp which has been helping her with the milk lung, and with enough reviews she might be back next week!!

But before we get to all that, let’s have a beer!

This Week’s Beer

River Falls Red Ale - Thomas Creek Brewery - Greenville, South Carolina

Mr. Bible Pants

* BA Link: https://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/2454/7594/

* BA Rating: 82

* Style: Irish red ale

* ABV: 6.2

* Aaron: 6

* Shea: 4

* Steve: 4

This Week’s Show

Round Table

Many thanks to Steve E for providing yet another round of fabulous beers for us to review. BGJ has received them and we’ll get them into the lineup asap.

We have a sad update to a story we’ve followed for a while now. Our favorite crazy, daredevil, flat earther Mad Mike Huges, died crash landing his steam powered rocket over California while attempting to get to 5000ft. His parachute deployed only seconds after launch and was torn away giving him no way to land safely.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-51602655

Thanks to listener and tweeter Cody for telling us, Sunday February 29th is Rare Disease day. Rare Disease Day is an observance held on the last day of February to raise awareness for rare diseases and improve access to treatment and medical representation for individuals with rare diseases and their families. NORD, National Organization for Rare Disorders has been raising awareness since 2008.

https://web.cvent.com/event/28255629-6178-43b3-8a2a-880dde92fe44/summary?i=E958C9A2-A054-4C5C-8E2E-65C3692EAB01&tm=SGiz71wNP_8xJ9z22dVgK8G-vJ29-ggf3zluChYdDyw

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https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/59737/10-horrifying-demons-and-spirits-japanese-folklore

Scary Stories of Japan’s Scorned Ladies

Rocky and Bullwinkle "or"

Terrifying Tales of the Typical Treatment of Women.

Ahh Japan.

A beautiful land filled with natural wonders and ancient traditions.

Home to some of the world’s most amazing food, innovations, and bigotries — they’re absolutely killing it in the fields of misogyny and transphobia!

We covered the latter some time ago, so today, let’s look at the former…

Because Shea trolled us into telling tall tales of terrifying trickery I present to the patrons a plethora of preposterous parables — all with the same lesson: don’t be a woman, and especially, don’t be an old, unwed, woman!

Seriously, it’s bad for everyone else’s health.

For example, the monk Anchin.

Our story begins with Kiyohime, a young woman who, apparently, was far more into Anchin than he was into her. Realizing that her lover was losing interest she did what any woman not yet properly diagnosed with hysteria would do: she started stalking him. Until one day while he was doing yee-oldie Japanese boat stuff, she followed him out into the river and since swimming + vagina = cursed, she turned into a fuck’n river serpent ya’ll. Because fuck it why not. Terrified by the horney swamp monster trying to m...

I’m the amazing, ailing, Aaron, and in This Week’s Show, episode 276, we are all unwell…

He looks absolutely beastly, it’s Shea!

Prone to telling long Tales From The Crypt, it’s Steve!

And, unfortunately, unable to join us — but in our thoughts are:

The delightfully distasteful, Big Gay Jim,

And our very own patient zero, the perpetually plagued, Jenn.

In their honor — and because I was sick and needed a quick template to follow — I present a silly and shameless, shambles of a QI shakedown.

Now, grab a beer and help us test the god hypothesis — because, while Nergal hasn’t struck us down yet, we are trying his patience!

Shea’s Life Lesson

This week I learned that masturbating while getting high isn’t called masturblazing, weed whacking, or highjacking, it’s actually called disappointing your parents.

Jenn’s Actual Lesson

Aaron channeling Jenn: Nergal is a Mesopotamian god who was worshiped from Akkad to Babylon. He’s a god of sickness, often finds himself fighting John Constantine, is one of those pesky other gods mentioned in the Hebrew Bible (2 Kings, 17:30), and his name means “poopy-dick.” The More you know.

Seriously, "dunghill cock", from the Dictionary of phrase and fable: giving the derivation, source, or origin of common phrases, allusions, and words that have a tale to tell by Ebenezer Cobham Brewer - 1900 - p268. Of course it’s an awkward yee-oldie name for a middle-eastern rooster, but whatever, my version is funnier.

But before we get to all that, let’s have a beer!

This Week’s Beer

Extra Special Red by O’Dell’s Brewing Ft. Collins, CO

* BA Link: https://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/267/33503/

* BA Rating: 88

* Style: Imperial Red Ale

* ABV: 8.7%

* Aaron: 7

* Shea: 3

* Steve: 7

This Week’s Show

Round Table

… I don’t think we have anything so… fuck it?

http://patreon.com/w4w 

Patreon Story

Snip Snip

* https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2020/02/17/mandatory-vasectomy-alabama-proposal/4791335002/

Alabama has widely been known as a progressive state, especially since the tolerant and accepting House Bill 314 voted in, late last year. For those who don’t know, HB314 is an Alabama statute enacted on May 15, 2019, that was set to impose a near-total ban on abortion in the state starting in November 2019, due to a federal judge the ban has been put on hold, but law makers still are fighting.

Representative Rolanda Hollis is tired of fighting for her autonomous rights so has taken it upon herself to "neutralize" the Human Life Protection Act, HB314. Hollis has authored a bill that would require each man to undergo a vasectomy at age 50 or "after the birth of his third biological child, whichever comes first." And to twist the knife men also would have to pay for the procedure themselves. Hollis explained her reasoning for the bill

"Many have seen HB-314 as an outrageous overstep; yet, year after year the majority party continues to introduce new legislation that tries to dictate a woman's body and her reproductive rights. We should view this as the same outrageous overstep in authority," she said.

"Just as I would turn to my doctor over my state legislator to make recommendations when deciding whether or not to have a surgery, or whether or not to take a certain type of medicine -- it is my doctor with whom I -- or any of my loved ones -- should consult when it comes to making the incredibly difficult decisions related to my personal reproductive rights," she said.

The bill has drawn criticism from outside the state, including from Sen. Ted Cruz, R-Texas.

"Yikes,

In This Week’s Show, episode 275, we dwell on all the fun options nature has to deal with its human infestation problem.

Now, grab a beer and help us test the god hypothesis — because, while Covid-19 (Coronavirus) hasn’t struck us down yet, we are trying its patience!

Shea’s Life Lesson

This week I learned that you can turn your ordinary sofa into a sofa bed by simply forgetting Valentine's day...

Jenn’s Actual Lesson

(cough, cough, cough)

But before we get to all that, let’s have a beer!

This Week’s Beer

Red Sunshine by Lucky Bucket Brewing Co. LaVista, NE

Donated By: Brendon

* BA Link: https://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/19241/350137/

* BA Rating: 3.63

* Style: American India Pale Ale

* ABV: 6%

* Aaron: 6

* Shea: 9

* Steve: 2

This Week’s Show

Round Table

Jenn is still fighting off the wee beasties in her system which are trying to sap her of her precious bodily fluids.

I visited her this week and I have to say, “Girl, you take care of yourself. You ain’t well, Coughy McCougherson.”

Dustin Williams wrote to us this week regarding the Even More Jesus beer which Aaron and Steve had nothing good to say about.

Stories

What was that again?

Find out at http://patreon.com/w4w right now!

Remember the old brain on drugs commercial where the father figure cracks an egg into an overhot skillet which ruined it for eating? He also said some bullshit, but all I really remember is him destroying that perfectly good egg. You’ve got to be careful about the amount of heat you use or you completely scorch the bottom making it rubbery and/or crunchy. Gross… What were we talking about again?

Oh right, I was going to talk about how being high on the devil’s lettuce can make you overly susceptible to “false memories”. According to the study author Johannes Ramaekers, professor of psychopharmacology at Maastricht University in the Netherlands, as little as one hit of weed doubled study participants number of false memories from a VR scenario. Defining our terms, a false memory a recollection of something that didn’t occur or different that what did occur.

Study co-author, Elizabeth Loftus, said that it’s actually quite easy to distort memories for the details of an event. In many studies over the decades it’s been shown that when witnesses are given misinformation about something they saw, they will remember things that were only suggested not witnessed. She also studied implanting false memories in the 1990s such as making people believe that they had been lost in a mall when they were young and had to be rescued and reunited with family. She said also, that it takes much more effort to plant this type of memory vs distorting details of an actual event.

The current study also found evidence that smoking the good shit can increase the number of false memories of several different types (recalling false details of a scene, being in a VR scenario where they become a poor student who steals a purse, and being asked to recall words they had never been given). Not sure why this happens, the researchers suspect that cannabis activates receptors in the hippocampus (memory center of brain) which produce “fragmentation of thought, loosening of associations and heightened distractibility. (side note: no shit. It’s like these researchers never actually got high on their own supply to learn the normal effects of consuming the green).

The takeaway for now is that it’s probably a good idea for investigative interviewers (ie the fuzz) to minimize questioning of high witnesses and wait for them to come down.

In This Week’s Show, episode 274, we cook up a banquet of delightfully realish treats to tempt even the most discerning crypto-palet.

Now, grab a beer and help us test the god hypothesis — because, while The Chiefs haven't struck us down yet, we are trying their patience!

Shea’s Life Lesson

This week I learned that Vikings covered their roofs in grass so enemy aircraft bombers couldn’t see them.

Jenn’s Actual Lesson

Jenn didn’t want to drink this week's beer.

But before we get to all that, let’s have a beer!

This Week’s Beer

Even More Jesus from Evil Twin Brewing Stratford, CT

Donated By: Steve E.

* BA Link: https://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/24300/81067/

* BA Rating: 4.31

* Style: Imperial Stout

* ABV:  12%

* Aaron: 1

* Shea: 1

* Steve: 1

This Week’s Show

Patreon Story

Fantastic Beasts and How To Eat Them

* https://blogs.bl.uk/digitisedmanuscripts/2012/04/unicorn-cookbook-found-at-the-british-library.html

* http://www.universalleonardo.org/work.php?id=438

* National Geographic London Book of Lists. https://books.google.com/books/about/National_Geographic_London_Book_of_Lists.html?id=-z-OAwAAQBAJ. Accessed 1 Feb. 2020.

“Taketh one unicorne” is how this begins. Because we’re roasting mothafuckn unicorns y’all!

Being a bit of a foodie I thought that, before Shea treats us all with a beastly quiz, I’d wet our appetites with one of best yee-olde recipes I could find; Roast Unicorn!

Unfortunately, Jenn isn’t here to restore herself with unicorn blood, but hey, we’ll try to save her some left-overs.

From the British Library’s Medieval Manuscripts Blog, comes a tail as old as the kitchen. Kind of… at least that’s what I’m going with. Professor Brian Trump - hereafter referred to as Brian for obvious reasons - of the British Medieval Cookbook Project described the find as near-miraculous. "We've been hunting for this book for years. The moment I first set my eyes on it was spine-tingling."

Like all great cookbooks Geoffrey Fule’s book features the best of illustrations. Check out your phone for a diagram that’s supposed to show a unicorn being cooked, but, more accurately, depicts a unicorn getting his nails done on a bed made of sausages.

Detail of a unicorn on the grill in Geoffrey Fule's cookbook, England, mid-14th century (London, British Library, MS Additional 142012, f. 137r).

Experts like Brian or Tim Jepson & Larry Proges who wrote National Geographic’s London Book of Lists: The City’s Best, Worst, Oldest, Greatest, and Quirkiest, believe that the cookbook was compiled by Geoffrey Fule, who worked in the kitchens of Philippa of Hainault, Queen of England (1328-1369). He was known for mixing odd flavors and as such one British scholar called him “the Heston Blumenthal of his day” - for those of us who don’t speak the Queen’s English, that’s kind of like calling him Gordon Ramsey or Emeril Lagassie.

Anyway, back to the unicorn roast.

First, one must catch a unicorn. A difficult task without the help of he who shall not be named. Luckily for us Leonardo Da Vinci took a break from leaving esoteric clues for Tom Hanks to find and accompanied his Young woman seated in a landscape with unicorn, late 1470’s pen and ink, with instructions on their acquisition.

First, because unicorns are, apparently, symbols of sacred and profane chastity, you’ll need a hot virginal maiden. Next, ditch her in a field to spend her day being a Disney princess until a unicorn appears, “the unicorn…because of its intemperance, not knowing how to control itself before the delight it feels towards maidens,

In This Week’s Show, episode 273, we go questing for lost hosts and dig up a big’ol treasure chest of Jenn… chest joke.

Now, grab a beer and help us test the god hypothesis — because, while Khrysos, Greek god of gold, hasn’t struck us down yet, we are trying his patience!

Shea’s Life Lesson

This week I learned that the best way to deal with the Corona virus is Lyme disease and some salt.

Jenn’s Actual Lesson

Did you know that there is more steel created per hour than there has been gold dug up throughout history?

But before we get to all that, let’s have a beer!

This Week’s Beer

Maple Pecan Brown Ale by Brickway Brewery Omaha, NE

Donated By: Brendon

* BA Link: https://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/33943/254786/

* BA Rating: 3.83

* Style: American Brown Ale

* ABV:  5%

* Aaron: 8

* Jenn: 7

* Shea: 5

* Steve: 3

This Week’s Show

Round Table

Love and wishes for a speedy recovery to Jim

* https://twitter.com/biggayjim

Happy upcoming 100 episodes for Ginger Snaps!

* https://www.facebook.com/thegingersnapspodcast/

* https://twitter.com/Gingerspod

Thanks to Mr. Biblepants!

Patreon Story

Beale's treasure

* http://bealesolved.tripod.com/id10.html

* https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beale_ciphers

* Beale papers 1855- http://www.unmuseum.org/bealepap.htm

The story goes, back in 1820 Thomas J. Beale made his way to sleepy little Bedford County, Virginia where he stayed at a small inn called Buford's Tavern but before he disappeared he intrusted a small box to Robert Morriss, the innkeeper. According to the story, the innkeeper, finally, opened the box 23 years later and found three encrypted messages. Robert spent decades trying to solve the blocks of numbers but no no avail. Before his death, Robert entrusted the ciphers with a close friend who then spent 20 years of his life trying to solve them, eventually solving only the second message and learning what the first message will lead you to…

“I have deposited in the county of Bedford, about four miles from Buford's, in an excavation or vault, six feet below the surface of the ground, the following articles, belonging jointly to the parties whose names are given in number three, herewith:

The first deposit consisted of ten hundred and fourteen pounds of gold, and thirty-eight hundred and twelve pounds of silver, deposited Nov. eighteen nineteen. The second was made Dec. eighteen twenty-one, and consisted of nineteen hundred and seven pounds of gold, and twelve hundred and eighty-eight of silver; also jewels, obtained in St. Louis in exchange to save transportation, and valued at thirteen thousand dollars.

The above is securely packed in iron pots, with iron covers. The vault is roughly lined with stone, and the vessels rest on solid stone, and are covered with others. Paper number one describes the exact locality of the vault, so that no difficulty will be had in finding it.”

This equals 2921 pounds of gold, 5100 pounds of silver, and $1.5 million of precious jewels—together valued at approximately $60 million.

The backstory of Beale’s treasure has been re-hashed countless times: Beale was a 19th century adventurer who supposedly discovered gold and silver on a hunting trip near the modern New Mexico-Colorado border. He lugged the riches home to Virginia and buried them, reportedly concealing the details—the location, contents, and heirs of the treasure.

This message was solved using a copy of the United States Declaration ...

In This Week’s Show, episode 272, Steve and Aaron record a buddy-show, because our other buddies bailed on us…

Now, grab a beer and help us test the god hypothesis — because, while Haribo hasn’t struck us down yet, we are trying it’s gummy-patience!

Shea’s Life Lesson

Dance a jig for Sheaster who couldn’t be here.

Jenn’s Actual Lesson

Sing a song for sicky.

But before we get to all that, let’s have a beer!

This Week’s Beer

Banana Bread Beer by Well’s Brewing

Donated By: Mr. Bible Pants

* BA Link: https://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/664/5488/

* BA Rating: 3.56/5

* Style: Fruit and Field Beer

* ABV:  5.2%

* Aaron: 1

* Steve: 2

This Week’s Show

Round Table

Quick note from Jenn: “I apologize if parts of my cavern story were unclear, but history seems to agree that Kincaid and Jordan were made up, so no one try to find Kincaid’s first white man life history in Idaho.”

Patreon Story

Don’t be a Dick… Grayson.

Hear about it now — and get yesterday's new 4 More Beers — right now at http://patreon.com/w4w

https://www.cbr.com/batman-burt-ward-robin-abc-penis-shrinking-pills/

DC fans will know what I’m talking about. Holy massive-mullet Batman! Also he’s kind of a douche. Young Justice gave him a more worthy… until season 3 that is… demeanor but from the start Dick has been… well… a dick. Even back in the golden ear (not technically) of Batman live with Adam West, Dick had penis problems.

Burt Ward, who played Dick in 1966, was recently interviewed because of a Hollywood Walk of Fame star and of course, the subject was dick. Not the one he portrayed, the one he tried to hide. His dick. Apparently, back in the day, ABC was worried that Robin’s tighty-geeny bulge would get the show censored. Bruce’s young ward wore overly snug briefs which drew the ire of the Catholic League of Decency. I can only assume they were outraged that someone would praid so much young hero meat before them without giving them access to the millionaires cave of secrets, so to speak. "They thought that Robin had a very large bulge for television," the actor said in an interview with Page Six. As Ward tells it, the issue became such a concern for ABC that the network had him go see a doctor, who prescribed pills "to shrink me up."

Apparently he reluctantly took them for about 3 days before realizing they would probably sterilize him. So he stopped. "I stopped doing that and I just used my cape to cover it." Which is why Robin is so awkwardly holding his cape in front of, what I had always just assumed was a Yavon Craig induced boner.

Following the show Burt saved us all the trauma of giving life to Dick’s angst-ridden Titan years. Because, you know, “fuck Batman” and all.

Show Stories

Picking stocks by watching cows

* https://www.ft.com/content/563d61dc-3b70-11ea-a01a-bae547046735

* https://threadreaderapp.com/thread/1218146789947334667.html

Aaron, do you have a stock portfolio and if so, do you follow professional stock “experts” for recommendations? I personally only have some indexed investments so I don’t spend a ton of time on keeping close track and this story shows that may very well be a reasonable approach.

This is a bit dated since it happened in 2016, but still germane today. A Norwegian TV program decided to do three month comparison of several different stock pickers and the shittiest results didn’t come from the actual shit. I’ll explain. They set up a little competition where they pitted a pair of professional stock pickers against an astrologist, a pair of beauty bloggers and a cow shitting in a field.

In This Week’s Show, episode 271, we walk like Egyptians… right into a nearby hospital-temple because even the Early Dynastic Period had better healthcare than America does today.

Now, grab a beer and help us test the god hypothesis — because, while Buddha hasn’t struck us down yet, we are trying his most infinite patience!

Shea’s Life Lesson

This week I learned that the only part of your reflection you can lick is your tongue.

Jenn’s Actual Lesson

Did you know that Buddha never visited the Grand Canyon? Nor did any Egyptian pharaohs. More groundbreaking information to come.

But before we get to all that, let’s have a beer!

This Week’s Beer

Screamin’ Reels - Saltwater Brewing - Try again later!

Donated by Travis

* BA Link: https://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/33611/109306/

* BA Rating: 3.6

* Style: American IPA

* ABV: 7%

* Aaron: N/A

* Jenn: N/A

* Shea: N/A

Something was wrong with the can…

This Week’s Show

Round Table

Plug for Accused Season 3, if you didn’t get enough ‘big business pretending that having their employees work with highly radioactive materials is FINE’, then good news!

From their website:

“In 1984, a father of three disappeared while working at a mysterious Cincinnati plant. It turned out he’d met a gruesome fate: Pieces of bone, his eyeglasses and walkie-talkie were uncovered inside a vat that reached 1350 degrees Fahrenheit. Two months later, the Fernald Feed Materials Production Center was revealed to have been processing uranium – and polluting the region. The dead man’s children believe their father was murdered because he intended to expose how the plant had been releasing millions of pounds of uranium dust into the atmosphere. We’re hoping to figure out: Did 39-year-old David Bocks kill himself, as Fernald officials alleged, or was he more likely killed?”

Check it out at: https://wondery.com/shows/accused/

Patreon Story

It’s time for another yee-oldie medical qwest!

And to celebrate Jenn’s return to the show and good health, it’s vagoo based.

Generally, these stories are us laughing at the ridiculousness of long-dead quacks — and this will certainly be that — but it’s also worth noting that like ancient China, the early Egyptians were actually well ahead of the medical curve. Sure, they had their fair share of witchcraft mixed in for good measure but they had an official, state-run healthcare system (yeah, let that since in - we’re actually worse off from a medical administration standpoint that 4000-year-old Egyptians.) They had official institutions of medical education called Per-Ankh, the House of Life, a kind of library/school attached to a temple. Students were scribes for years, transcribing and duplicating medical texts until they graduated and became swnw (swu-nu), or doctors.

The earliest recorded physician in the world, Hesy-Ra, practiced in ancient Egypt. He was "Chief of Dentists and Physicians" to King Djoser, who ruled in the 27th century BC. There are some ideas about older Sumerian medical practitioners but they were decentralized and unregulated, so we’re going with Hesy-Ra.

The lady Peseshet (2400 BC) may be the first recorded female doctor: she was possibly the mother of Akhethotep, and on a stela dedicated to her in his tomb she is referred to as imy-r swnwt, which has been translated as "Lady Overseer of the Lady Physicians" (swnwt is the feminine of swnw).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2rvLEJrQm7g

A day in the life of an Egyptian doctor - Ted-Ed

In This Week’s Show, episode 270, we sit down and hold onto our asses for king, country, and the promise of beers yet to come!

Now, grab a beer and help us test the god hypothesis — because, while Kim Kardashian’s arse hasn’t struck us down yet, we are trying its patience!

Shea’s Life Lesson

This week I learned that your customer service voice is just baby talk for boomers.

But before we get to all that, let’s have a beer!

This Week’s Beer

Omniscient Signal - Public Access Liquids, Boston, MA

Donated By: Steve-E

* BA Link: https://untappd.com/b/public-access-liquids-omniscient-signal/3287265

* BA Rating: 3.89/5

* Style: IPA - Imperial / Double New England

* ABV: 8%

* Aaron: 8

* Shea: 7

* Steve: 6

A OK Always Oktober - Gruner Brothers Brewing, Casper, WY

Donated By: Lonely Wyoming

* BA Link: https://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/54696/385326/

* BA Rating: 3.81

* Style: German Märzen / Oktoberfest

* ABV: 5.5%

* Aaron: 7

* Shea: 9

* Steve: 7

This Week’s Show

Round Table

4MB recording on Sunday Jan. 12th watch the socials or your inbox for a patron link!

Donations of Beer!

* Brendon

* Steve-E

* Mr. Bible Pants

"We have companies with a lot of money backing us, you are nobody; we are going to fry you with legal sues"

That was the threat to sue them to oblivion that the Spanish National Homeopaths Assembly used to harass the Spanish Association to Protect the Sick against Pseudoscientific Therapies and they have now sued them for damaging their public image and APETP is asking for help with the legal costs: https://www.gofundme.com/f/defensa-contra-hostigamiento-jud…

APETP had a hand advising the Spanish health ministry in the creation of the list of techniques officially designated as pseudo-therapies: https://elpais.com/…/02/28/actualidad/1551356928_946157.html

And they are also promoting an EU manifesto agains pseudosciences https://pseudoscience-manifesto.apetp.com/

Share if you can... Lets see if we can pull it up like in Britt Marie Hermes case

Patreon Story

Demon Scheme'n

https://heavy.com/news/2020/01/tracy-milanovich/

Boston based psychic Tracy Milanovich didn’t see it coming when she was arrested last week. Ms. Milanovich stole $71,000 after convincing a mother that her daughter was possessed by demons, cops said. She did this by telling mom her daughter was “dead in God’s eyes” and had “something inside of her that was bad.”I feel like these are the same ways anti vaxxers tell if your kids have been inoculated. The Somerset PD said that Milanovich, 37, had been charging the woman in exchange for exorcising the demon. In addition to the cash, Milanovich is also accused of getting the victim to buy household items for her, such as bedding and towels. Because reasons, I guess.

The victim/best customer ever told police that she initially paid $1,000 cash in November for a “‘Candle Lighting’ for the past, present, and future, to keep her daughter free from demons that are in her,” according to the filing. Well I feel like that didn’t work at all.

Days later, Milanovich told the woman that the demons were worse than she originally thought and asked her to bring her nine towels, 10 rolls of paper towels, two sets of bed sheets, and one jar of water. The mother would later bring her several other items as well,