This season finale has it all! God opens with some more misogynist rules, and then quickly pivots to violence, sending the Israelite army out for an epic battle against the Midianites. Led by everyone’s favorite javelin-wielding badass, Phineas, the Israelites utterly destroy their enemies and discover the shocking identity of a traitor (or should we say “trait-hur”?) in their midst. Moses then succumbs to the power of the dark side as he puts a black bucket on his head and goes full Egypt on some innocent women and children. We wrap with not one but five weddings, which are mostly an excuse to get God drunk, show off the costume department’s love for neutral colors, and keep the inheritance within the family. (Numbers 30:2–36:13)

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