The U.S. has ended medical visas for child amputees because it raised the ire of a woman currently being deposed about genital sandwich jokes. The newest moral panic involves taking flamethrowers to dolls to defeat an ancient Mesopotamian demon. Finally there’s a Congressman who’s trying to set himself up as an international weapons trafficker, kind of like the Floridian Merchant of Death, except of course stupidly and failing at it.

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