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Another rehearsal room guitars + effects jam with Jamatar.

Really like how this one turned out.

Also really need to fix how noisy my guitar is...

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Last night, my sister and I took part in a World Record Relay attempt to fundraise for brain cancer research which involved running around Princes Park for an hour each at 1am - 3am. It was surprisingly peaceful and nice running at that time of night, but today has felt a bit of an off day because my body does not like its sleep schedule disrupted.

This week has been... good? I can't remember. I went to a workshop for design week where we got to make sandals and a bag out of recycled materials which was fun. I burnt my fingers while burning the end of some string to stop it fraying and that hurt like hell for the whole evening (I still had fun though), and has made playing guitar this week a bit interesting.

I spent Thursday night feeling very sorry for myself. I guess I just felt a bit unlucky and frustrated about certain parts of my life (although I acknowledge I am VERY lucky on the whole). I'm very much equipped to manage my own thoughts but nevertheless we all sometimes get in a bit of a sad mood and that's okay. I cheered myself up with some chicken shop takeaway and a nice long phone call with my Mum. I also exchanged voice notes with a friend of mine who was going through an existential career crisis. It was nice to share these thoughts and help each other carry the load of them.

I guess that's where the hook from this song comes from. Just this feeling of wondering whether maybe I'm not good enough for some people? Maybe I'm not cool???? I've never really been "cool". I'm a big believer in doing things my own way and finding those who think similarly, yet every know and then I look at people who seem to fit in so seamlessly with the trends and I feel a bit of envy. Don't get me wrong though, I'm very happy with who I am and the way I do things, it just makes an interesting feeling to explore in a song.

Today I went to another Melbourne design week event (lots of VERY COOL people there) about small apartment living and making the most of small spaces. It was hosted by the founder of the youtube channelnever too small. I left with this dream of finding a nice small mid-century apartment somewhere and renovating it into a space that I could make the most of. Perhaps a dream it will stay. They did discuss an interesting thought though - that these apartments shouldn't be thought of as forever homes. People change. Life demands different things. People grow. People may start families. I've been considering moving for a while, somewhere closer to the city rich with culture and vibrancy, but nervous to do so as that probably wouldn't be sustainable for a long time. Maybe it doesn't have to be. Maybe now is the right time in my life to do so and make the most of those things while I still can?? Who knows. Big thoughts. I must digest on them for a bit I think.

Oh yeah, I also had some vocal technique breakthroughs this week maybe? Learnt a bit more about getting my voice out of my throat and resonating in the room. Moving the sound to the nasal palate, front teeth, and lips. It's hard to do, but there's sections throughout this where I think it has made a big difference. Keen to practice more.

CGDGCE tuning on this one too.

a knot of muscles binds my neck

from whispers dealt behind my back

looking over my shoulder

I see where I want to be

am I not cool?

am I not cool?

though I want to be like them

I sit outside of the fence

my tongue is dry, my mouth is sour

bleeding from my tasteless sense

am I not cool?

am I not cool?

and maybe I'm on the outside

but maybe that just means I'm free

and maybe what I taste isn't sweet

but maybe what I taste is me

am I not cool?

am I not cool?

am I not cool?

am I not cool?

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And now for something very different!

A few weeks ago, I had to recycle a high-energy track that I couldn't arrange the way I wanted. Well this week I came back to it and tried my best. It's far from perfect but it sort of works. Depending on the feedback I get, I might come back to it again to try to improve it.

I made this one exclusively on the Synthstrom Deluge (no added effect except for the light compression and spectral balance from the mastering), taking advantage of the new automation framework.

I ended up with something that could speak to the body but also sounded spiritual. That's why I chose this title.

I don't have a lot of experience in this genre (although I made many unreleased dance tracks in the past) and I understand that this is could be considered unconventional, but at the same time, it sounds very much like me and I wonder if this is a path I should keep exploring.

Anyway, thanks for listening.

Have a great week!

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In a way, the dance-y culmination of a set of unintentionally related pieces, borrowing instruments and motifs from my week 11, 12, 13, and 20 pieces, among others, transforming them from ambient into boogeyable. Self-referential without shame! The motivation for the piece is pretty explanatory from the title, running along the Sisyphean treadmill in a long series of close calls in the full understanding that your failure is eventual and inevitable - but for how long can you keep running?

Given more time, would balance the mix out better - some of the clutter and mess was desired, but not all of it. Also hell yeah, got to bring back the cat purr kick.

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The colors were less distracting than the knowledge of what it would do it you if it got a hold of you.

Modular and MPC One

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Pretty Happy with this one. I spent most of the week playing with the OXI E16 to create instruments on the M8. It is a lot of fun cause I can modulate several parameters at the same time while the loop is playing and get the sound I want "by ear" since I have no idea what most of the parameters do. I tried to perform with the OXI and record, but was hard to nail the volumes and not overdo it, so I took what I learnt from those performances and applied in the M8 using effects. This is starting to be lots of funs, I was missing the OXI to make things more playful.

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Someone mentioned the MLS FM packs on the M8 Discord, which led me to their lovely handpan samples.

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Aims for this week

No notes - just noisy or rhythmic sounds.

That was it!

Read more

There's process notes on my blog, as usual.

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21. gee baby, ain't i good to you

hhuwoa on soundcloud - 21. gee baby, ain't i good to you

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made with my selfmade program for playdate (introduced here: https://weeklybeats.com/bufaw/music/paralysed  and example videos how I made the song in week 16: https://youtu.be/7UwAGvMbD1g https://youtu.be/ZoSO6G0w67s https://youtu.be/7UwAGvMbD1g )

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