Oh, the Adam Levine of it all! In this episode, Simone is joined by Mel Zee to discuss aggressive monogamy, dating after death, being single in Vancouver, and the current state of online dating profiles. We meet several Catfishes, a man who serenades his date in the weirdest way possible and a guy who's obsessed with CrossFit (and talking about himself). Mel and Simone critique online dating profiles and cap off the episode with a rapid-fire game of FMK.

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I never knew root beer would taste so good...on meat! In this episode, Simone is joined by writer Kate Kaput to discuss some of their most hilariously bad dating experiences, books, and reality TV and Kate's brief appearance on Top Chef. We learn that Kate is afraid of puppets and Simone is afraid of wizards. We also meet a man with very questionable alcohol choices and a guy who visited a surgeon to become a jew. Also: more stories from that summer camp for single adults! The pair cap off the episode with a rapid-fire game of FMK: Dawson's Creek Edition.

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You don't get a 14th chance with me! On this episode, Simone Paget is joined by travel writer, Lynn Brown to discuss the current state of men and dating in New York City. What's the deal with men who come on strong and then disappear? Simone and Lynn swap ghosting horror stories and examine what makes an interaction go from awkward to creepy. Simone shares the story of a guy who would rather open new businesses than discuss his feelings and another that puts the "D" in D-list actor. All of this begs the question are men okay? The pair wrap up the show with a rousing game of FMK (Disney edition!) where they ponder what it would be like to be in a throuple with Mickey and Minnie Mouse.

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Who wants to date a toaster? Not me! In this episode, Simone is joined by Amber Adrian, a writer, intuitive healer, moon with, and all-around internet fairy godmother. They discuss healing in long-term relationships, overcoming a scarcity mindset when it comes to love and money, and breaking up with meat. We learn that Simone keeps a "love spreadsheet" and feels like she's been personally victimized by a combination of 90's R&B songs and rom-com. They end the episode by putting the bachelors of Sex and the City to task with a rapid-fire game of F*ck, Marry, Kill.

Got a crazy dating story? A wild breakup tale? Something else you'd like to get off your chest? Email: [email protected] to be featured on the show.

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No, you can't pee on me, but thanks for asking! In this episode, Simone is joined by Rochelle Latinsky, a digital strategist and veteran internet person. Simone and Rochelle enter the sexual vortex that is the app Feel'd and compare notes on ghosting. They discuss Beyonce's album Renaissance, ethical non-monogamy, sex positivity, lucky girl syndrome, and whether or not Harry Styles is marriage material. 

Got a crazy dating story? A wild breakup tale? Something else you'd like to get off your chest? Email: [email protected] to be featured on the show. 

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In this episode, Simone is joined by Elizabeth Bull, a former fashion editor, and fellow Beyonce enthusiast. Elizabeth and Simone discuss dating in Vancouver as a plus-sized woman, perfumes from the 1990s, and Matchmaker Maria's 12-date rule. Elizabeth recounts a first (and last) date with a cross-eyed cowboy and a second date with a man who burst into tears after taking seven shots. Is height a dealbreaker? The pair discuss. Simone recounts dating a man who resembled a garden gnome and a dysfunctional ex-boyfriend who lacked gift-giving etiquette. The episode wraps up with a rapid-fire game of F*ck, Marry Kill: problematic date edition. 

Got a crazy dating story? A wild breakup tale? Something else you'd like to get off your chest? Email: [email protected] to be featured on the show. 

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Oh, the fart of it all! This episode, Simone is joined by Treena Orchard, a writer, professor and all-around dating app scholar (Simone's words, not Treena's!) Simone and Treena discuss what it was like dating in a time before dating apps, the inherent issues with online dating and how we can date & mate better. Treena discusses a date with a flatulent suitor. Is poor footwear a dealbreaker? What about socks with sandals? OR JORTS? We think yes! Simone shares a play-by-play of several dates, including a penniless weirdo with a dead guinea pig and a sartorially challenged alcoholic. The episode wraps up with a rapid fire game of F*ck, Marry, Kill: Degrassi High, Original Recipe Edition.

Got a crazy dating story? A wild breakup tale? Something else you'd like to get off your chest? Email: [email protected] to be featured on the show. 

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It's a very special holiday edition of We're Never Doing This Again! In this episode, Simone is joined by writer, John Drake. They discuss their favorite sex clubs, what the buffet situation is like at a nude resort, dating during a pandemic, holiday-themed sex toys and so much more. Also in this episode: a man "falls" on a Christmas ornament and a nurse gets an interesting surprise. The episode wraps with a rousing game of f*ck, marry, kill, featuring a very special guest, SANTA CLAUS!

How does this even happen?! This week, Simone is joined by guest @valorie_clark to discuss a series of dating interactions that defy explanation. Simone and Valorie discuss navy blue 'guy sheets,' dating while sober, and an apartment so dirty, it's mindblowing. Also in this episode: a fly-by-night Romeo confesses his feelings and then flees the city and an ex sends a break-up package full of...mixed CDs? The pair wrap up the episode with a rousing game f*ck, m*rry, kill that begs the question, is a filthy home the secret to a good marriage? 

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Small towns make you do crazy things! In this episode, Simone is joined by Peter DeWolf to discuss the peaks and perils (okay, mostly perils) of dating in a small town. Simone shares a story about a man with an unhealthy (?) interest in the Food Network and the time she went on a date with a real-life Mr. Dress Up. Simone and Peter also discuss erotic audio stories, the romantic viability of anyone who wears wrap-around sunglasses, how to avoid dating your cousin, and whether re-runs of the West Wing are the key to true love. The pair closes out the show with a rousing game of F*ck, Marry, Kill which begs the question: is Guy Fieri the ultimate libido killer? 

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