What Excites Us!

In this episode, I’m chatting with Julia Sheldon aka Ask Auntie Julia. She is is a Teen Relationship Coach who helps teens have better relationships with themselves, their bodies, and others, so that they feel seen, heard, and supported. Her goal is to help set them up with skills, tools, and knowledge that will help them for the rest of their lives. We talk about helping parents have hard conversations, how she addresses porn, what teenagers really want, Why she has hope for the future and so much more. There was a lot I cut from this episode! If you would like the raw unedited version, please join the Patreon at the . And if you have questions for Julia and would like me to bring her back let me know on the website, whatexcitesus.com

If you would like to see a picture of Velma the Vulva, or another adorable picture of Julia it's on the episode webpage which you can find at earthlydesire.com/ep24Visit her at askauntiejulia.com
https://www.facebook.com/AskAuntieJulia/
https://www.instagram.com/askauntiejulia/
https://www.tiktok.com/@askauntiejulia

Linda River Valente joins me again to discuss using Tarot and Oracle Cards to guide sexual play with yourself and others. We begin by talking about how the planet Venus in Gemini affects us and inspired this topic because it is happening now, June 22 - July 17. Linda then walks us through some fun exersizes and ways you can use the cards to inspire some sexy times if you are alone or with others. We finish off by talking about some ways to go about buying a deck is you are looking to get your first deck(s) 

Linda is an astrologer, tarot visionary, witch, holistic sexuality educator, burlesque performer, and producer who lives in Vermont with her husband, son, and their handsome and beloved ginger tomcat.

You can learn more about LRV at https://www.lindarivervalente.net/
Or on facebook at https://bit.ly/3nfFtbK
Join her patreon at https://www.patreon.com/LindaRiverValente
Send her an email at [email protected]

She used the Linestrider Tarot Deck https://siolothompson.com/linestrider-tarot
And the Wild Unknown Archetypes Deck https://www.thewildunknown.com/

This episode is my framework for helping you have great sex by keeping it REAL. While I do mean being in your body and the present moment, REAL is also an acronym. R is to encourage you to redefine what you consider sex, E stands for Evaluate what your desired outcomes are for the sex you are about to have, A is to remind you to Align with yourself and your partners, and L is about leaving everything else at the door.

In the episode I talk about how cheesy I am and my new tattoo that emphasizes that. I offer permission to you, and I reference a few folks who have influenced this discussion.

To see the tattoo, get the permission slip, or talk back to me please visit the show webpage whatexcitesus.com

Emily Nagoski and her book Come As You Are is available at:
https://www.emilynagoski.com/home

Here is the list of reasons some folks have had sex
https://psychcentral.com/blog/237-reasons-to-have-sex#4

I think this is the episode of the American Sex Podcast with Sunny Megatron that I reference, but really most episodes of this podcast are fantastic, and certainly the ones with Midori
https://sunnymegatron.com/hotter-negotiation-midori-podcast/
https://sunnymegatron.com/category/podcast/

For more about Midori
https://bit.ly/3z2YsO4

And the video of How to train to Monkey Mind
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4PkrhH-bkpk

Melissa Grove Azzaro RDN LD, The Hormone Dietitian, and I discuss PCOS, which is a prevalent cause of infertility and affects vulva owners in many other ways. We talk about what exactly PCOS is and how it affects you, polyps and fibroids, that there is more than one kind of estrogen, and that sometimes the body doesn’t metabolize it well, why there aren’t more health studies of or even with women, Melissa’s approach to helping you, and more.

You can find Melissa at thehormonedietitian.com and on Instagram at instagram.com/the.hormone.dietitian

Alicia Davon, who you can find at PleasureCourse.com, is my guest in this episode. We talk about extended orgasm, what it is & how to do it. Some ways to bring the spicy back into your relationship, and strategies for moving through mismatched libido. The Davons (Alicia and her husband Erwan) have a bunch of classes coming up, including the 5 Keys for A Successful Relationship on May 21st & 22nd, 2022, and they take coaching clients as well.
For informationabout the upcoming class on May 21 & 22, 2022: https://bit.ly/3Lwrl8C

You can also find her on her Instagram, https://www.instagram.com/davonmethod/
Or skip right to the link tree at https://linktr.ee/davonmethod

The Vendetta by Stefan Kartenberg (c) copyright 2018 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license. http://dig.ccmixter.org/files/JeffSpeed68/58628
Growth in the Garden (Feel Good Mix) by Doxent Zsigmond (c) copyright 2014 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial (3.0) license. http://dig.ccmixter.org/files/doxent/47682

This episode is a tell-all with Aetherius, and she does not hold back. Aetherius is a 35-year-old trans woman. She is a prominent member of a small kink group in northern Vermont, and she says that even though she is newer to the scene she feels like she’s found a piece of herself she didn’t realize was missing. She works in IT, enjoys gaming with her children, and relaxing with her wife and their boyfriend.

In this episode I talk about why pleasure is good for you, going into detail about hormones and the effects on the body. Plus some simple ways to cheat the system.

Bibliography:
https://theconversation.com/what-is-hedonism-and-how-does-it-affect-your-health-78040

https://neurosciencenews.com/pleasure-brain-8909/

https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2020/07/200727114739.htm

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/longing-nostalgia/201903/too-much-pleasure-not-enough-happiness

https://www.healthline.com/health/affects-of-joy#3.-Your-autonomic-nervous-system

http://www.psychedinsanfrancisco.com/the-importance-of-pleasure/

https://www.mdlinx.com/physiciansense/what-do-sex-chocolate-and-exercise-have-in-common-research-explains/

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/15834840/
[Oxytocin, a mediator of anti-stress, well-being, social interaction, growth and healing] by Kerstin Uvnas-Moberg 1, Maria Petersson article found at the NIH National Library of Medicine

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3183515/
The orgasmic history of oxytocin: Love, lust, and labor Navneet Magon and Sanjay Kalra

https://www.healthline.com/health/how-to-increase-oxytocin
12 Ways to Boost Oxytocin by Crystal Raypole as found on Healthline.com

https://www.everydayhealth.com/oxytocin/guide/
What Is Oxytocin? By Lindsey Konkel on EverydayHealth.com

https://toneandsculpt.app/blogs/eat/food-to-improve-your-love-hormone
Food to increase oxytocin: how to boost oxytocin level by Nicole Ramirez on ToneSculpt.com

https://www.everydayhealth.com/sexual-health-pictures/orgasms-for-a-better-life-the-surprising-benefits-of-sexual-pleasure.aspx
Orgasms for a Better Life: The Surprising Benefits of Sexual Pleasure at Everyday Health

https://www.healthline.com/health/dopamine-effects#definition
How Does Dopamine Affect the Body?  Crystal Raypole at Everyday Health

https://atlasbiomed.com/blog/whats-going-on-with-hormones-and-neurotransmitters-during-sex/
What’s Going On With Hormones And Neurotransmitters During Sex Michelle Clarke

https://www.henryford.com/blog/2021/05/how-to-boost-feel-good-hormones-naturally
How To Boost Feel-Good Hormones Naturally On the Henry Ford Health Center page

https://www.sclhealth.org/blog/2019/06/the-real-health-benefits-of-smiling-and-laughing/
The Health Benefits of Smiling on the SCL health page

https://badgirlsbible.com/why-does-sex-feel-so-good Why Does Sex Feel Good? Bad Girls Bible Blog

https://www.maxim.com/maxim-man/why-sex-feels-good-2016-11 Science Has Finally Discovered Exactly Why Sex Feels So Good ZEYNEP YENISEY

https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/why-does-sex-feel-good-sexual-pleasure Why Does Sex Feel So Good, Anyway? KASANDRA BRABAW

https://teachmeanatomy.info/pelvis/other/pudendal-nerve/ The Pudendal Nerve from Teach Me Anatomy

Angel Rowe is a professional sex coach, this is his personal story of living with chronic pain from CRPS (Complex Regional Pain Syndrome) as well as some professional insights as well. We talk about his strategies for coping when first diagnosed and struggling, ow using his non-dominant hand has helped him reframe touch, breathwork, sensate focus, how practice helps, his dogs and being a dog trainer and so much more. One of the things I’m taking away from this conversation is that even if you don’t believe that everything happens for a reason, that engaging in the reframing that Angel has done helps tremendously.

Sensate Focus in Sex Therapy: The Illustrated Manual by Linda Weiner & Constance Avery-Clark.
The app Angel was talking about is called Breathwork.
You can find Angel at albertasexcoach.com or if you are on tiktok, follow him and his dogs as wolfyrain.

This episode is a conversation with my dear friend Shahn about his sexual journey beginning as a young queer kid growing up in Vermont, to where his identity lands now. It is raw and honest and is not for delicate ears.
Outright Vermont - An organization dedicated to helping youth who identify as LGBTQIA+. They hold regular programs, a summer camp, peer groups, and have a whole bunch of educational info for kids and parents too. www.outrightvt.org
While talking about what to name this episode Shahn went down an internet rabbit hole and found this article, and we thought it was interesting and useful to share https://xanwest.wordpress.com/2014/03/09/what-is-stone/

Music notes: Opening Theme - The Vendetta by Stefan Kartenberg (c) copyright 2018 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license. http://dig.ccmixter.org/files/JeffSpeed68/58628
Coaching Ad - Harmony by PolyPlus (c) copyright 2021 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution (3.0) license. http://dig.ccmixter.org/files/polyplus/63962
Patreon Ad - Let me talk, Carol (instrumental) by Josh Woodward - Found on FMA The Free Music
Archive End music - Shahn aka 1nterupt on Sound Cloud - https://soundcloud.com/1nterrupt