What the HELL Were You Thinking?

Episode 516: Red, Red Whine

This week Host Dave Bledsoe woke up brutally hungover behind a trash dumpster in the Tacony neighborhood of Philadelphia meaning a whole New Year has started.  (It’s tradition) On the show this week, we end our hiatus without actually going on hiatus. (Turns out Dave was just sad) We start our generational pivot with the first leg of the tripod that holds up the Baby Boomers, the Red Scare! 

Along the way we discover that Dave isn’t a communist (Turns out their parties are not his kind of parties) then we dive right into the history of international Communism with its bearded Daddy, Karl Marx. We breeze past the first Red Scare and honestly most of the second one, focusing on the major players.  (Oddly, mostly Republicans) We talked about why they were looking for a communist under their beds (because they didn’t like Jews) and why they had to persecute anyone who might be a communist.  (Again, they don’t like the Jews).  Then we take a quick look at the impact of the Red Scare on American society and how it formed the Boomer generation. (It is why so many of them don’t like the Jews)

Our sponsor this week is Your Local Communist Party, there are six of us, how scary can we be? We open with a 50s newsreel about international Communism and close with Kuerdas who prefer reds.

Show Theme: Hypnostate Prelude to Common Sense

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Closing Music: https://youtu.be/K3eobcILO3Q?si=_9vnBoQtYy5gvSjA

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Citations Needed:

Britannica: Karl Marx

https://www.britannica.com/biography/Karl-Marx

Wikipedia: The Communist Manifesto

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Communist_Manifesto

“Enemies from Within”: Senator Joseph R. McCarthy’s Accusations of Disloyalty

https://historymatters.gmu.edu/d/6456

Anti-Communism in the 1950s

https://www.gilderlehrman.org/history-resources/essays/anti-communism-1950s

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What the HELL Were You Thinking is officially on hiatus until mid March 2026 while Dave recharges his batteries (and completes some court ordered personal betterment.) We thank all of you who have been with us for over ten years, you made the journey a joy. Watch this space for further announcements, even if those announcements are requesting the whereabouts of of the host.

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Show Notes Episode 430: Carl’s Worst Christmas Ever and Other Holiday Tales

This week Host Dave Bledsoe tries some amazing eggnog some guy’s brother made with  lighter fluid and starts telling stories. (Again) For our annual “Jesus, is it Christmas already?” episode, we dig into the vaults of Dave’s Brain to bring you lurid tales of Christmas’ gone wrong in every way possible. Be they marital infidelity, public masturbation or a singularly misfortunate ornament mishap, someone is not having a happy holiday. (This is why Dave doesn’t get invited to story hours at the library.) So gather your family around the fire (I mean the adult family, leave kids watching their Youtube or whatever) pour yourselves something from a bottle being passed around and get ready for stories of people having a MUCH worse Christmas than you are!

Our sponsor this week is the Holiday Ornament Safety Council who remind you that decorations go on the tree, not inside you.  We open with a heartwarming family gathering and close with Lord Weatherby who is freaking out.

Show Theme: Hypnostate Prelude to Common Sense

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music:https://youtu.be/T7OBPvc9ddA?si=dtGOwiq-8t-HRzSz

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network! http://seltzerkings.com/

Citations Needed:

18 Christmas Disasters That'll Make You Feel Bad For Laughing

https://www.buzzfeed.com/beckybarnicoat/christmas-disasters

People Tell Us Their Worst Christmas Horror Stories

https://www.vice.com/en/article/jgmm5p/people-tell-us-their-worst-christmas-horror-stories

24 Christmas disasters to make you feel better about burning the turkey, from poisoned guests to 7,000 acres of fire damage

https://www.countrylife.co.uk/food-drink/24-christmas-disasters-make-feel-better-burning-turkey-poisoned-guests-7000-acres-fire-damage-209545

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Show Notes Episode 343: Frosty the Snow Ho (Redux)

This week, Host Dave Bledsoe is basically phoning it in so he can get on with the business of his Christmas Bender.  (You probably won’t be able to notice anything different)  On the show this week, we take a look at some of the bizarre and inexplicable Christmas specials that taught us that sharing special times with family is the true meaning of Christmas.  (And to buy whatever junk they were plugging in the special.)

Along the way we learn that Dave is not only a bad son, he is a really shitty uncle too!  (Shocked?  Don’t be.) Then we dive right into the strange and questionable television offerings that have “entertained” kids for decades.  (Yes, we mention the Star Wars special, but it is hardly the only one out there.)  From Eternia to 75 million years before the Reason for the Season was ostensibly born in a stable, we pick at all the logical flaws and blatant commercialism we can find.  Finally, we wrap up with REAL Holiday specials, with heartwarming themes like gangbags and sodomy!  (Because spending time with the ones you love, or the ones you love for about an hour is what Christmas is really about!)

Our Sponsor this week is the Elvish Liberation Front, from the North Pole to the Keebler Tree, we won’t stop until every elf is free.  We open with Han and Chewie and close with the Universal Robot Band getting funky for Christmas!

Show Theme: https://www.jamendo.com/track/421668/prelude-to-common-sense

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/7NEnSkpbmCY

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network! http://seltzerkings.com/

Citations Needed:

The Gay Subtext of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

https://www.vulture.com/2016/12/rudolph-the-red-nosed-reindeers-gay-subtext.html

The 16 Worst Christmas Specials of All Time

https://www.toplessrobot.com/2011/12/the_16_worst_christmas_specials_of_all_time_1.php

Fright Christmas: 15 Horrifying Kids Holiday Specials

https://www.cbr.com/horrifying-kids-christmas-specials/

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Show Notes Episode 515: Sodas In Spaaaaace!

This week Host Dave Bledsoe got liquored up on orange flavored Metamucil and vodka and got kicked out of a retirement village bingo game. (Again) On the show this week we head back to 1985 when the Cola Wars took off for low orbit because Coke and Pepsi had money to burn.

Along the way we learn that Dave never stood a chance at NASA. (They didn’t make space suits in 5XL) Then we dive right into what the first astronauts ate in space. (Goo, they ate goo.) Then we head back down to the Earth where a Coca Cola executive had an idea that was out of this world, and how it turned into yet another vicious skirmish in the long running and increasingly bitter “cola wars”. We learn how Coke spent a quarter of a million dollars and Pepsi opened their medicine cabinet.  Finally we discover why sodas crashed and burned like a solid rocket booster in chilly weather.  (Too soon?).

Our Sponsor this week is Tap Water, if you’re thirsty get some.  We open the show with Coke in space and close with astronaut Chris Hadfield singing out sitting in a tin can.

Show Theme: Hypnostate Prelude to Common Sense

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/AfEng898uRA?si=JGyjlv-GQ_D-4Q4Z

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Citations Needed:

Fallout from the Unauthorized Gemini III Space Sandwich

https://www.nasa.gov/history/fallout-from-the-unauthorized-gemini-iii-space-sandwich/

How would fizzy drinks behave in space?

https://www.sciencefocus.com/science/how-would-fizzy-drinks-behave-in-space

The First Soda in Space: When NASA Got Caught Up in the Cola Wars

https://www.nytimes.com/2025/07/29/science/coke-pepsi-nasa-space-shuttle.html?unlocked_article_code=1.6E8.TPFd.7B7gLuAuHrDA&smid=url-share

'Space cola wars' at 35: When Coca-Cola, Pepsi tested soda in space

https://www.collectspace.com/news/news-081120a-space-cola-wars-35-years.html

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Show Notes Episode 340: We’re Wall to Wall and Tree Top Tall

This week Host Dave Bledsoe is coming down out of Hog Town in a Thirteen Letter Shit Spreader hauling Go-Go Girls on the Dance Floor bound for Bingo Town, only to discover that no one has a single fucking clue what he is saying when he talks like that.  (Not an uncommon event.) On the show this week, we climb into the cabs of our big rigs and take you back to the days when the Asphalt Cowboys captured America’s heart and everyone had a CB radio in their Pontiacs. 

Along the way we learn that Dave thought he would be a Big Rig Driver because he liked the hats, until he learned he would need to park the damn things.  From there we dive right into the strange cultural moment in the 1970’s when everyone in America talked like a truck driver.  (What a bunch of Bucket Mouths) We find out how a combination of gas prices and not being able to drive 55 made the men (and they were almost all men) on the road big damn heroes because of some commercials for white bread  (Yeah, this story goes in some unexpected directions.)

Our Sponsor this week is Pappy’s Pep Pills, we swear they ain’t speed (wink wink) We open the show with NPR and close with Phil and Shawn talking about BJ and the Bear.

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/pX5XB_MOVfA

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network! http://seltzerkings.com/

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Show Notes Episode 87: Thanksgiving In Hell Total Redux

This week host Dave Bledsoe found himself in Federal Custody after getting shitfaced in an Irish bar and loudly demanding he wants to be deported to Ireland.  (Note, he is not actually FROM Ireland but he thought he would give it a try.) On the show this week we dug deep into the vaults to pull out an ancient but seasonally appropriate show, dusted off some of the references and hope you wouldn’t notice we did it years ago.

Along the way we discover that no one in Dave’s family misses him at holiday dinners at all. (Or any other time of the year.) Then we dive right into how to get through Thanksgiving Dinner without killing a distant relative.  (Weed, the answer is weed.) Then we cover in painful details all the ways to WIN a fight with your relatives at your Thanksgiving Dinner. (Fight dirty.) 

Our Sponsor this week is Distractors, punch the button, stop the fight before it starts. We open the show with a typical American holiday dinner and close with Flula who does not want you to call it a comeback.

Show Theme: Hypnostate Prelude to Common Sense

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/G-VM5wqzhWY?si=bLw7aKYGno689VRx

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Show Notes Episode 259: “We’re Not Gonna Take It”

This week Host Dave Bledsoe puts a Twisted Sister pin on his uniform and drunkenly shouts at himself in the bathroom mirror just to feel like someone else is with him.  (The man is desperately lonely and drinking too much.  You know, just normal Dave stuff)  On the show this week we travel back to 1985 to examine the Parents Music Resource Council, an issue so unimportant and trivial to the modern context that it should distract you for a good half hour from all the crazy shit in the world.  (You’re welcome)

Along the way we meet the White Wives of Washington who decided it was their job to censor artists.  (They were the Karen’s of the 1980s)  We introduce to you to each of the Filthy Fifteen the list of songs the PMRC deemed so vile and offensive that children must be protected from them at all cost.  (God forbid they learned about getting off from Cyndi Lauper!)  We hear from the artists who defended the list, even though some of the Metal songs are just BAD songs. (Not evil, just really  poorly written.)  Finally, we learn why Tipper Gore felt it was SO important we have warning labels on music.  (Hint, it was so parents didn’t need to talk to their kids.)

Our Sponsor this week is Columbia House Records, who want you to know they are back and they are coming for what they are owed.  We open the show with Dee Snider getting real with the Senate and close with Sunkissed Music being adorably rebellious!

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www.whatthehellpodcast.com Give us your money on Patreon  https://www.patreon.com/WhatthehellpodcastThe Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/3fCaxOBBPQo

Citations Needed:

Parental Advisory Forever: An Oral History of the PMRC’s War on Dirty Lyrics

https://www.newsweek.com/2015/10/09/oral-history-tipper-gores-war-explicit-rock-lyrics-dee-snider-373103.html

The Filthy Fifteen: Censorship, Gore And The “Parental Advisory” Sticker

https://www.udiscovermusic.com/stories/filthy-fifteen-pmrc-censorship/

The Tipper Sticker at 30: The Most Entertaining (and Least Effective) Attempt at Censorship in Rock History

https://www.kqed.org/pop/18111/the-tipper-sticker-at-30-the-most-entertaining-and-least-effective-attempt-at-censorship-in-rock-history

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Show Notes Episode 514: Brooks Brothers Riot, Daddy O

Part 2 of the 2000 Election

This week Host Dave Bledsoe tried crashing a corporate mixer for the open bar only to be quickly discovered because he was wearing a neck tie over an "Female Body Inspector” t-shirt. (Again) On the show this week we head back to the 2000 Election and the court case that elected a President.

Along the way we discover Dave thought he might be a lawyer some day! (As opposed to constantly NEEDING a lawyer like today.) Then we dive into a short history of why we have a Supreme Court. (It turns out to make a President into a king 250 years later.) Then we rejoin our election lawsuits already in progress.  We watch the campaigns spend ungodly amounts of money on lawyers as they wind through the judicial system.  We meet the Brooks Brothers Mafia, a group of GOP Nerds who staged a little protest.  Then we head to the place this was always going to be determined, Washington DC for a partisan Supreme Court decision that damned America!

Our Sponsor this week is My Little Lawyer children’s clothing, dress for the job you want them to have when they grow up! We open the show with a recap of the story so far and close with Somesing who wants you boys to break it up!

Show Theme: Hypnostate Prelude to Common Sense

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/FPysALpIQlM?si=OkxNai_AVy9Slkmp

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Citations Needed:

Bush leads Gore by 327 votes in Florida recount, Associated Press reports

https://www.cnn.com/2000/ALLPOLITICS/stories/11/10/election.president.02/

Presidency Hinges on Tiny Bits of Paper

https://cseweb.ucsd.edu/~goguen/courses/275f00/abc-chads.html

So, who really won? What the Bush v. Gore studies showed

https://edition.cnn.com/2015/10/31/politics/bush-gore-2000-election-results-studies

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Episode 513: Ballot With Butterfly Wings

Part 1 of the 2020 Election

This week host Dave Bledsoe got kicked out of an Andrew Cuomo election rally for constantly drunkenly screaming “Andy, let’s go pick up some bitches!” (Again) On the show this week we turn the clock back twenty five years to the election that broke America. (We could have had a Lockbox!)

Along the way we learn that Dave voted for Ralph Nader. (What an asshole) Then we dig into why we have an Electoral College. (Slavery.) From there we meet the men who were vying to lead the country into the 21st Century, one a boring politician and the other a dumbass fratboy with a drinking problem and a famous last name. From there we head to Florida for an explanation of why Florida is like it is. (Weird, filled with old people and alligators).  We discuss the election night faux pas that left the media with egg on its face and shit in their nickers. Then we take a listen to the recently discovered recording of Al Gore’s retracted concession speech to George W Bush.

Our Sponsor this week is Ballot Express, when you need to rig an election fast, you need Ballot Express.  We open with a painfully young Jon Stewart FINALLY calling the 2020 Election and close with Joel Goguen who has anger issues.

Show Theme: Hypnostate Prelude to Common Sense

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/sNYJ5ELTxBM?si=_hmhHHaK-cCTvf4M

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Citations Needed:

THE 2000 CAMPAIGN: THE POLLS; Poll Shows Either Candidate Within Reach of Victory

https://www.nytimes.com/2000/11/06/us/the-2000-campaign-the-polls-poll-shows-either-candidate-within-reach-of-victory.html

The Florida Recount Of 2000: A Nightmare That Goes On Haunting

https://www.npr.org/2018/11/12/666812854/the-florida-recount-of-2000-a-nightmare-that-goes-on-haunting

Contested presidential elections Bush v. Gore

https://millercenter.org/contested-presidential-elections/bush-v-gore

Election night has been a big media event since electric lights first announced the winner in 1892

https://theconversation.com/election-night-has-been-a-big-media-event-since-electric-lights-first-announced-the-winner-in-1892-148413

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