What the HELL Were You Thinking?

Show Notes Episode 295: Big Lizards In Our Backyards!

This week Host Dave Bledsoe attempts to discover if Reptilian Aliens have taken over the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network when they refuse to fund his “research materials” (He means liquor) On the show this week we talk about the REAL Reptilians, the ones controlling EVERYTHING including your local Burger King!

Along the way we learn about why Dave is still afraid of Sleestaks (It’s the vinyl of their costumes, very squeaky) Then we dive in the history of Draconians, who they are, how they came here, what the want, and why the drove that dude to blow himself in Nashville over Christmas. (Ironically, it was slow 4g LTE coverage not the 5g nonsense.) Then we “explain” the REAL motives behind the Lizards and their minions, our precious Orgone Energy! (No, that is not a real thing.)

Our Sponsor this week is Glaxxor and Glaxxor Interstellar Attorneys at Law, got a problem with the Greys, take ‘em to court with G&G! We open the show with Enik in the Lost City and close with the Dead Milkmen who have lizard problems of their own.

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www.whatthehellpodcast.com

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music:https://youtu.be/5k68Uz3w3x8

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network! http://seltzerkings.com/

Citations Needed:

Feds probing whether Nashville bomber believed in lizard people conspiracy

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/girlfriend-nashville-bomber-warned-police-he-was-building-explosives-2019-n1252536

Map of the Lost Lizard City under Los Angeles

https://web.archive.org/web/20171019052609/http://bigthink.com/strange-maps/443-secret-caves-of-the-lizard-people

Reptilian conspiracy theory

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reptilian_conspiracy_theory

WHAT DO REPTOIDS LOOK LIKE?

http://www.reptoids.com/Vault/phydes.htm

Beyond Duality Quotes

https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/1966766-beyond-duality-the-art-of-transcendence

Metatron on Reptilians and Orgone

http://channelingpapaeli.blogspot.com/2017/07/metatron-on-reptilians-and-orgone.html

orgone pucks, illuminati reptilians making mammals jump through hoops for cash flow

https://kroabot.wordpress.com/2011/07/02/orgone-pucks-illuminati-reptilians-making-mammals-jump-through-hoops-for-cash-flow/

Rohan Connolly on Twitter

https://twitter.com/rohan_connolly/status/1346602188672438272?s=20

Uncited Additional Reading:

https://www.gaia.com/article/eisenhower-meets-aliens-holloman-afb

https://www.inquisitr.com/2939994/grey-aliens-signed-treaty-with-eisenhower-in-1954-after-u-s-government-rejected-overtures-from-nordic-or-pleiadian-aliens/

https://www.wearethemighty.com/articles/airman-claims-kidnapped-taken-moon-reptile-aliens/

https://www.theatlantic.com/national/archive/2013/10/how-spot-reptilians-runing-us-government/354496/

https://u.osu.edu/vanzandt/2018/04/18/the-world-is-controlled-by-a-group-of-elite-reptiles/comment-page-1/

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Episode 294: I’m Drinking 2020 Goodbye

This week Host Dave Bledsoe looks back at what he’s done to his body and soul this long and painful year and decides to get drunk. (Again.) On the show this week we look at everything that happened in 2020 and what Dave drank to get through it. (If you are looking for deep insights on the year, this ain’t it.)

Along the way we learn about Chicago's cute little prank it likes to pull visitors by making them drink battery acid with a sprig of catnip in it. Then we go around the world in a dozen or so liquors so powerful, so disgusting, so terrible that only a desperate alcoholic or a man with literally nothing left to lose would drink them. (Fortunately for us, Dave Bledsoe is both!) From India to Ireland, from Italy to China Dave explains how as things got worse in 2020, the levels he stooped to in the liquor cabinet went lower and lower. (Honestly we do NOT know how he is still alive!) Then we wrap up with simply the most vile concoction to ever be bottled and sold to teenagers who didn’t know any better! (Poor, simple fools!)

Our Sponsor this week is Fast Eddie’s Quick Vax for when you are right and don’t want to wait your turn. We open the show with Jim Gaffigan getting us pumped for 2020 and close with Nine Pound Hammer coping with loss.

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music:https://youtu.be/vhUuyYtyTJs

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network! http://seltzerkings.com/

Citations Needed:

MCDOWELL’S NO.1 RESERVE WHISKY

https://somewhiskybloke.com/2019/01/30/mcdowells-no-1-reserve-whisky/

McDowell No 1 Whisky Reviews

https://www.mouthshut.com/product-reviews/McDowell-No-1-Whisky-reviews-925008057

Coronavirus Makes Polish Liquor Fly Off the Shelves as Hand Sanitizer

https://www.wsj.com/articles/coronavirus-makes-polish-liquor-fly-off-the-shelves-as-hand-sanitizer-11587147054#

A Guide to Chinese Alcohol

https://www.lostlaowai.com/guides/basics/guide-chinese-alcohol/

Is Southern Comfort Any Good???

https://southerndrinkingclub.com/blogs/the-buzz/is-southern-comfort-any-good

Uncited Additional Materials: 

https://theculturetrip.com/europe/united-kingdom/articles/warning-these-are-the-worlds-13-most-dangerous-spirits/

https://www.thedrinksbusiness.com/2016/12/worlds-most-disgusting-alcoholic-drinks/

https://www.quora.com/What-are-some-of-the-nastiest-alcohol-products-you-have-ever-drunk

https://medium.com/@jacksonhraw/ranking-every-type-of-alcoholic-beverage-ive-ever-tried-from-worst-to-best-c34491b84eab

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/gross-alcoholic-drinks_n_4059712

https://twistedfood.co.uk/these-are-the-8-most-horrible-shots-you-can-order-at-a-bar

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Episode 293: This Is the Last Worthless Christmas That You’ll Have to Spend

This week Host Dave Bledsoe goes on his annual Christmas Bender, so Producer Gavin St. James FINALLY gets his big shot at the microphone!  (By which we mean we are doing a clip show but Gavin comments on the clips.)  

Along the way we learn about why Gavin can’t go home for Christmas this year.  (The perfidy of the French) Then we dig into the clips from previous years episodes carefully curated by Gavin randomly grabbing some audio files, slapping some Creative Commons Music underneath it and dropping into the file.  (Producers all nod knowingly)  Then we wrap up with the UK Christmas #1, which is a thing that happens in the UK every Christmas and this year has a REAL interesting contender.  

Our Sponsor this week is Krampus.com, providing the power of Krampus to American parents.  We open the show with Frank Constanza and close with Kunts Christmas who have some thoughts on Boris Johnson. 

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: http://borisjohnson.info/

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network! http://

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Show Notes Episode 292:  Finger Licking Good Times

This week Host Dave Bledsoe has his rejection to be named an Honorary Kentucky Colonel due to his love of bourbon rejected with prejudice.  (Again.) On the show this week honoring the 40th Anniversary of the passing of an American legend (And notorious fuckboi)  we talk about the life and times of Colonel Harland Sanders.  (Dude was HORN-EE!)

Along the way we discover the secret of raising children in the 1980’s. (McDonald's six nights a week, KFC on Sunday.) Then we dive right into the life of man who is much more than a white suit and a secret recipe!  (He also swore so much it impresses Dave!)  From his humble beginnings in Indiana (yeah, the Colonel wasn’t even FROM Kentucky!) to working on the railroad and pretty much every other job you can imagine before he became a fried chicken magnate.  We also learn how he lost so many of those jobs.  (Turns out, you do not FUCK with the Colonel, he WILL put you down!)  Then we chart his rise in the world of chicken sales from humble entrepreneur to world striding titan to the breaded bird arts, and perhaps even to becoming the object of a religion. (Praise his breaded goodness!) Then we brazenly reveal the REAL Secret Recipe!  (Come at us Big Chicken!)

Our Sponsor this week is General Slander’s West Virginia Fried Chicken,  who wants you to know yeah, we got a GENERAL!  We open the show with Mister Mac Kenzie’s conspiracy theories and close with Southern Culture on the Skids roadside cuisine choices.

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www.whatthehellpodcast.com

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/BCCqeHm5VDY

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network! http://seltzerkings.com/

Citations Needed:

Colonels of Truth

https://www.damninteresting.com/colonels-of-truth/

Colonel Pleasures A new Lifetime “mini-movie” gets one thing right about the KFC founder: his horniness.

https://slate.com/human-interest/2020/12/colonel-sanders-lifetime-mario-lopez-horny.html

Colonel Sanders Wikipedia

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colonel_Sanders

Kentucky∼Fried

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/1970/02/14/kentucky-fried

KFC recipe revealed? Tribune shown family scrapbook with 11 herbs and spices

https://www.chicagotribune.com/travel/ct-kfc-recipe-revealed-20160818-story.html

Uncited Additional Background 

https://www.theverge.com/2016/7/5/12096466/colonel-sanders-kfc-meme-life-story

https://vault.fbi.gov/Colonel%20Harlan%20Sanders/Harland%20%28Colonel%29%20David%20Sanders%20Part%201%20of%201/view

https://www.vice.com/en/article/7k94md/kfc-lifetime-movie-colonel-sanders-recipe-for-seduction

https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/venessawong/the-real-colonel-sanders

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Show Notes Episode 291: The Ruror Furor

This week Host Dave Bledsoe tries to recreate his Grandpa’s White Lightening recipe only to get arrested by the NYPD for trying to set up a still in Central Park. (Again) On the show this week are talking about the Rural Purge, which has nothing to do with the myriad election lawsuits and everything to do with Beverly Hillbillies. (You are welcome!)

Along the way we learn what the early pioneers of television dreamed of their new creation being and how that was NEVER going to happen. Then we take a tour through the early history of television shows, from their origins selling cigarettes in the 1940’s through their adolescence selling cigarettes in the 1950’s and 60’s to the end of it’s selling cigarettes in the 1970’s. Are we saying that banning TV cigarettes ads in what became known as the Rural Purge? (We don’t THINK not being able to sell cigarettes ads for TV actually caused the Rural Purge, but we are not ruling it out!) Finally, we look at the shows the Purge made room and how it changed the face of television, for a minute or two.

Our Sponsor this week is the Hooterville Chamber of Commerce. When you are ready to say goodbye to city life, why not say Hello Hooterville? We open with Jenna Maroney’s new movie and close with Roy Clarke snarking about Hee Haw being canceled.

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www.whatthehellpodcast.com

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/hV85sDCRGkE

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network! http://seltzerkings.com/

Citations Needed:

Co-Bro Andrew Walsh

https://twitter.com/andrew_walsh/status/1334050319924228096?s=20

Rural Purge Wiki

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rural_purge

American Rural Comedies of the Sixties Part Six

http://mercurie.blogspot.com/2013/09/american-rural-comedies-of-sixties-part_23.html

All In the Family Wiki

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All_in_the_Family

Mobituaries Podcast The Rural Purge: Death of the Country Broadcasting System

https://www.mobituaries.com/the-podcast/the-rural-purge-death-of-the-country-broadcasting-system/

Uncited Background Reading

https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/UsefulNotes/TheRuralPurge

https://decider.com/2017/05/10/trial-error-and-the-revenge-of-the-rural-purge/

https://medium.com/@ChrisXMorgan/remember-tvs-rural-purge-b0a115c2a2b2

https://bittersoutherner.com/the-weird-history-of-hillbilly-tv

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Show Notes Episode 290: That Loser Who Shot John Lennon

This week Host Dave Bledsoe runs into what he thought was a crazed fan trying to kill him only to discover it was just an angry bar owner trying to collect on a bar tab.  (That happens a lot) On the show this week we mine the 40th anniversary of John Lennon’s death for all the clicks and downloads we can with the backstory of the fat stupid loser that killed him.

Along the way we learn that Dave’s Mom would totally fuck Elvis, and honestly so would Dave.  Then we dive right into the early years of total dweeb Mark David Chapman.  We follow him through is highly mediocre childhood, through his unimpressive teens, into his unexceptional young adulthood and watch Mark steadily fuck up everything single thing he puts his hand to.We mean this fucking guy is just a total waste of space. (He makes Gavin seem impressive!) We tried to get the Little People on the record for this show, but they now deny knowing this second rate criminal shitbag. (That will make sense, we promise)

Our Sponsor this week is Todd Rundgren who regrets any unpleasantness his words may have inadvertently provoked.  We open with Howard Cosell on Monday Night Football and close with The Cleverlys with an ode to Mark’s whinging..

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The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

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www.whatthehellpodcast.com

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/6BbyNFonwBI

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network! http://seltzerkings.com/

Citations Needed:

Mark David CHAPMAN

https://murderpedia.org/male.C/c/chapman-mark.htm

The Death and Life of John Lennon

https://nymag.com/news/features/45252/index3.html

Mark David Chapman: The Man Who Killed John Lennon

https://web.archive.org/web/20150210044824/http://www.crimelibrary.com/terrorists_spies/assassins/chapman/2.html

Last Podcast on the Left Episodes 315-316

https://open.spotify.com/episode/1HlELLJZRibPXprghn5Azv?si=vmpL2wxAQx6ZZuSWjBMInQ

https://open.spotify.com/episode/2tlLUe8es2HbYCZB3uCSGI?si=2TojKuRPTy-q3pY_kffZ4g

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Show Notes Episode 289: Reverend Jones, You Better Watch Your Speed

Part Two of the Early Life of Reverend Jim Jones

This week Host Dave Bledsoe mixes up a mean punch of Flavor Aid and Everclear calling it the Jonestown Surprise and gets kicked out of Friendsgiving.  (again) On the show this week we wrap up with part two of Jim Jones the early years much to our surprise.  (We really thought he would run a best of show this week! But again, IS there really such a thing?)

Along the way we track the rise of Jim Jones in California from Midwestern Cult Leader new in town to a mover and shaker in California politics! (He was Rosalyn Carter’s pen pal!)  We learn how the Peoples Temple got small town California to accept them (money) and how Jim Jones got big city politicians to embrace him.  (votes).  Then we see the slow spiral that leads Reverend Jones and his followers to their ends in a snake infested jungle compound by off brand fruit drink and cyanide.  (Never say we aren’t a fun podcast for the kids!  Actually, ALWAYS say that!)

Our returning sponsor this week is Second Hand Messiah, for your budget messianic needs!  We open the show with Jim doing a little faith healing and close with Claudia Hoyser urging Mr. Jones to just slow down.

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/N3QyI-snfDA

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network! http://seltzerkings.com/

Citations Needed:

Neighbors in California Say Cult Members Were Helpful

https://www.nytimes.com/1978/11/24/archives/neighbors-in-california-say-cult-members-were-helpful-helping.html

Raven: The Untold Story of the Rev. Jim Jones and His People

https://www.amazon.com/Raven-Untold-Story-Jones-People/dp/1585426784

The Road to Jonestown: Jim Jones and Peoples Temple

https://www.amazon.com/Road-Jonestown-Jones-Peoples-Temple/dp/1476763836/ref=pd_bxgy_img_2/137-2242446-4094263?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=1476763836&pd_rd_r=63d3f343-9ab6-45cc-8c32-a3e479a615fb&pd_rd_w=ANlQk&pd_rd_wg=Sv7Y5&pf_rd_p=f325d01c-4658-4593-be83-3e12ca663f0e&pf_rd_r=8CZF983ZPN3CZ4FCEG80&psc=1&refRID=8CZF983ZPN3CZ4FCEG80

Peoples Temple Wikipedia

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peoples_Temple

Madman in Our Midst: Jim Jones and the California Cover Up

https://www.webcitation.org/5vybRwHQX?url=http://www.rickross.com/reference/jonestown/jonestown43.html

Nation: Paranoia And Delusions

http://content.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,919897,00.html

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Holiday Bonus: Episode 35 Jesus, Uncle Dave Is Already Drunk (Redux)

This week the show is “enjoying” a socially distant Thanksgiving, meaning Dave is alone in the studio naked from the waist down rubbing his bare ass on Gavin’s microphone. (So, pretty much a regular week for him, and Gavin.) Don’t worry, the regular show will be in your feed Monday morning!

We are breaking out this bonus edition for you Thanksgiving listening from November 2015. It is re-recorded because our first year recordings are REALLY awful. (As opposed to now?) 

So enjoy this Bonus Edition and have a Happy Thanksgiving, hopefully you are not killing your relatives. (Unless, of course, you really don’t like them or stand to inherit a lot of money. We don’t judge!) 

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/g_qUZ_QjIo8

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network! http://seltzerkings.com/

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Show Notes Episode 288: Pass Me A Bottle, Reverend Jones

This week Host Dave Bledsoe feels the power of the spirit move him as he finishes off a bottle of grain alcohol and passes out on the street in front of his building. (again) On the show this week we mark the 42nd Anniversary of the Jonestown Massacre with our trademark brand of good taste and compassion. (Meaning very little of either)

Along the way we look back to the childhood of the biggest mass murderer in American history and tell you all the GOOD things he did in his life! (No really, he did them and we tell you about them!) We learn a lot about why Dave yells so much on the show. (Turns out, genetics!) Then we dive deep into the early days of the Peoples Temple, Reverend Jones’ travels and his fervent belief in Communism. (Again, it was really doing some good when it began, later not so much!) Finally answer the question on so many people’s minds about how Jim Jones was able to get people to follow him like they did. (If you are a regular church goer, you will NOT like the answer.) Finally we wrap up part one of this two parter with Pastor Dave passing around the offering plate. (Tiny bottles of liquor are perfectly acceptable in lieu of money.) 

Our Sponsor this week is Flavor Aid who are perfectly cool with you saying “drink the Kool Aid”. We open the show with local news of the massacre and close with Drew Hale hanging with Mister Jones. 

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/g_qUZ_QjIo8

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network! http://seltzerkings.com/

Citations Needed:

The Road to Jonestown: Jim Jones and Peoples Temple

https://www.amazon.com/Road-Jonestown-Jones-Peoples-Temple/dp/1476763828

Last Podcast on the Left Episodes 300-304

https://www.lastpodcastontheleft.com/episodes/2018/1/12/episode-300-jonestown-part-i-everyone-in-the-world-is-my-friend

KGO San Francisco News Scene 1978 Jonestown

https://youtu.be/OapPeL-69Ns

Wikipedia Jim Jones

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Jones

Alternative Considerations of Jonestown & Peoples Temple

https://jonestown.sdsu.edu/

NINE PLACES TO HIDE

https://classic.esquire.com/article/1962/01/01/nine-places-to-hide

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Episode 287: The Witch of November

This week, Host Dave Bledsoe lies when he tries to convince the bartender he was a sailor on the Edmund Fitzgeral and should not pay this bartab, only to learn the 23 year old NYC bartender has no idea who this “Edmund Fitzwhatever” is. On the show this week, we mark the 45th anniversary of the loss of the Pride of the American Side with a whole new theory on what happened to The Fitz. (Hint: corporations=bad)

Along the way we learn that a young Dave was very bad at playing guitar. (Shocking!) From there we jump into the history of SS Edmund Fitizgeral with everything you newer thought you wanted to know about the big ship and origins. Then we sail along her ill fated final voyage into the teeth of a hurricane west wind! (Are there Gordon Lightfoot lyrics sprinkled throughout? You know it!) Finally, we examine the failures and blame shifting of everyone involved in the tragedy from the Coast Guard to the corporate masters of the Might Fitz. We also learn that you should never Google “Toledo Express”. (Don’t say we didn’t warn you!)

Our Sponsor this week is the Columbia Transportation Division, Oglebay Norton Company of Cleveland, Ohio who wants you to know we were just a shell corporation for the big player! We open the show with NBC news coverage from 1975 and close with Headstones ringing the church bell 29 times. 

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The Show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/TheHell_Podcast

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www.whatthehellpodcast.com

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The Show Line: 347 687 9601

Closing Music: https://youtu.be/Y8LBkYjniTU

We are a proud member of the Seltzer Kings Podcast Network! http://seltzerkings.com/

Citations Needed:

NBC Nightly News December 11th 1975

https://youtu.be/z7tzntwy0_8

Wikipedia SS Edmund Fitzgerald

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SS_Edmund_Fitzgerald

What sank the Edmund Fitzgerald? 6 theories on what caused the shipwreck

https://www.mlive.com/news/2015/11/what_sank_the_edmund_fitzgeral.html

Forty years after the sinking of the Fitzgerald, untold stories emerge

https://www.duluthnewstribune.com/news/3878323-forty-years-after-sinking-fitzgerald-untold-stories-emerge

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